Loyalty and Lies

by L A Cotton

  "How do you know all of this?"

  "I'm local. Not Chastity Falls, but next town over. The Donohues are well known in these parts."

  My filter stalled, the words spilling out before I could stop them. "So, what are they, like the mafia or something?"

  Just what I needed, being a target of the local mafia's prodigal son.

  Her eyes narrowed and she drew a small breath. "Or something. Let’s just say that you don't get on the wrong side of Marcus Donohue. Or Braiden. And now he's star QB for Chastity Fallen; all hell will break loose this year."

  Just perfect. Not only was Ice eyes Braiden Donohue, but he was set to be the most freaking popular and intimidating guy at the academy. He was a god as far as the masses were concerned. My only saving grace was that someone like him, as popular as him, wouldn't look twice in my direction. And he had already looked once, so I was off the hook. Right?

  "... the dark-haired one in the navy jersey is Dennis. White tee, that's Kyler, we hooked up the other night and trust me when I say that he looks just as fine without the shirt." The girls laughed, hanging off Talia's every word. "Checked shirt with the boots, Shaun, he's from Texas. The black one is Travis. And Pierce is missing."

  "Pierce?"

  That name, I remembered that name. Pierce had saved me from Braiden at the party.

  "Braiden's best friend and star linebacker. He prefers the background to the limelight. Cleans up after Braiden, keeps him in check."

  What in the hell kind of place was this? I had picked CFA for its quiet, small town appeal.

  I watched Braiden through my downcast lashes. He moved with the poise of someone important. The other guys gravitated around him, and girls lingered in the wings waiting to be granted permission for an audience with him. A brunette approached him, her boobs spilling out of her barely there blouse. He snaked a hand around her waist, pulling her close, and she squealed with delight, tipping her head back to grant him access to her neck. He walked his fingers along her bare skin, sweeping his hand into her hair and dipping his mouth to her ear. Then he whispered something to her and she smiled like he just answered all her prayers. The lust in her eyes was obvious, even from my concealed spot in the booth. She was offering it up on a plate to him, and by the looks of it, he was more than willing to partake.

  "Seriously, Ana, stop staring. You don't want to get involved with Braiden. He would eat you alive." Elena watched me.

  "What? I, hmm, no. God, no. I just can't believe how people act around him."

  "Chica, did you do no research on Chastity Falls before applying? Everyone knows Braiden. Everyone knows the stories about this town. About Marcus Donohue."

  I groaned. "Apparently not everyone."

  Talia laughed. "Don't look so worried, girl. Stay out of his way and you have nothing to worry about."

  Too late.

  "Yeah, I guess you're right."

  The sick feeling in my stomach told me that she was wrong. I only hoped that she wasn't.

  Chapter 4

  Something caught my attention out the corner of my eye, and I couldn’t help the smile from spreading over my face when I realized that it was another note.

  How is your first week going?

  Jackson sat relaxed in his chair, his attention focused on Professor Shacks, giving nothing away.

  I scribbled back a reply and dropped it onto his table. Thirty seconds later, he held out the note for me, a grin breaking over his gorgeous face. As I reached for the slip of paper, our fingers brushed, and the flutters I fought so hard to ignore every time I was close to him exploded.

  So, about that coffee. Are you free after class?

  I gulped down the breath lodged in my throat. It was my last class of the day. Elena was going out with Tyson, so I had the dorm to myself to study... remember... break down. Or I could go drink coffee with Jackson. I could try to be normal.

  Maybe.

  He replied right away.

  You're going to make me beg, aren't you?

  I didn't reply. I didn't know how to reply. I was too busy trying to calm the emotional storm sweeping through me. Thankfully, Professor Shacks started outlining our first paper, a good excuse for me to remain focused on her and not the note burning a hole into my table.

  As soon as she dismissed the class, Jackson spoke. “So, about that coffee?"

  The compartment I fought so hard to keep locked started to rattle; the memories trying to force their way out. "Hmm, I- I, hmm-"

  Sensing my hesitation, Jackson held up his hands and said, "Hey, look, no pressure. It's just coffee."

  You can do this.

  "Okay." My voice sounded so small that I was surprised he had even heard me, but the way his eyes softened told me that he had.

  "Great, I know just the place. Meet me around the back of the building in two minutes." His eyes shifted around us as if he was on edge or nervous.

  My eyes followed Jackson as he scanned the room once more, and then pulled on a baseball cap. He brushed past me and ducked out of the room into the hallway. Things just keep getting weirder. Was I just supposed to find my own way there? Was it some kind of joke? Curiosity got the better of me and I followed the line of students outside and onto the sidewalk. Everyone seemed to be heading in the direction of the student center, but I took the path snaking around the back of the building. There was a small parking lot at the end, and I heard Jackson before I saw him, as he stepped out from a hidden alcove in the wall.

  "Do you mind riding in my car?"

  The word hit me like a brick wall, the impact almost painful. My knees buckled and I winced as the color drained from my face.

  "Is everything okay? You look like you've seen a ghost."

  The torrent of tears kept at bay but the dam that I had spent months constructing started to weaken under the pressure of the moment. Breathe, just breathe, ten, nine, eight, seven...

  "Ana?" His emerald eyes watched me.

  You can do this. YOU CAN.

  I closed my eyes, finished my countdown, and reinforced the dam walls. When my eyes opened, Jackson was still watching me with a look of confusion on his face. "Sorry, I get a little claustrophobic... small spaces." The lie easily rolled off my tongue. "I'll be fine. Lead the way."

  "Are you sure? We can always do it another time."

  "Now is great." I started walking toward the lot, hoping he would follow. I needed to move, to do something, do anything to distract me from the panic gnawing at my insides.

  He slow jogged beside me, pointing out a fancy, sleek, black sports car. "That's mine." It looked expensive, and that usually meant safe. Didn't it?

  "Nice ride," was all I managed to choke out.

  He laughed and my body relaxed slightly, as he opened the passenger door and motioned for me to get in.

  "Wow." My eyes devoured the plush leather seats and futuristic looking console as I shakily climbed in, fighting hard against the rising panic in my chest. The whole car oozed money. Lots of it.

  Jackson shrugged, settling into the driver's seat. "It's just a car."

  "It's not just a car. You must know that, right?" I chuckled, surprised by how good it felt to do something so simple. Jackson had a way of calming me. "So, isn't there anywhere on campus that has coffee?"

  He gunned the engine and the car roared to life. It had the sound of something sporty. The kind of cars Danny and his friends watched from afar back home. Danny. The thought made my heart crack, but I focused on pushing down the memories.

  "Nowhere does coffee like Blacks." Jackson started reversing the car out of the lot, and I noticed a small access road leading toward the forest instead of the one road in and out of the campus.

  "Blacks? Am I supposed to know what that means?"

  "You'll see. Hold on."

  Hold on?

  Before I could ask, Jackson stepped on the gas and the car lurched forward, forcing me back against my seat. My heart was beating so fast that I couldn't think straight and couldn't find my w
ay through my emotional whirlwind. I was scared—terrified. But part of me felt alive. Being in the car with Jackson was awakening an old, dormant part of me. As if facing my fear was breathing new life into me.

  "Hey, everything okay over there?" Jackson turned to me, taking his eyes off the single traffic road following the edge of the forest.

  "More than okay." I smiled.

  A real, genuine, honest-to-God smile. Call me weird, sick, twisted, masochistic... none of that mattered. Not the voice in my head telling me that this was wrong, telling me that I didn't deserve to feel like this. I was smiling, something I hadn't done for just over sixteen months. The moment wasn't just significant—as Dr. Simmonds would say—it was freaking huge.

  Jackson laughed and refocused on the road, which started to turn into the thick of the forest. It was a sight to behold. Giant firs encased the road, standing tall to attention like leafed soldiers, granting us access through their world. Yesterday's rain had lifted, leaving only a fine mist in the air. The particles glistened in the light seeping through the dense fir canopy.

  Jackson noticed me taking it all in. "Something else, isn't it?"

  I nodded, too entranced to speak. It was worlds apart from the sunny, warm climate that I had left behind—the beaches and shopping malls, the parks and huge condos with pools.

  We rode in silence. The radio played in the background, and Jackson hummed along to more than one song. Ten minutes passed, then twenty. I was beginning to wonder where he could possibly be taking me when the trees started to thin and the ocean came into view. The coastal road was almost at the cliff’s edge, but Jackson navigated it like he could drive the route with his eyes closed.

  I grew up by the beach, but not like this. This dark sea was angry and thrashing against the rocks. Ferocious, white horses rolled on top of the current, their journey ending at the cliff’s face. It was nothing like the golden sands and crystal blue waters where I had enjoyed my summers.

  "It’s rough out there."

  "Yeah, it looks so fierce," I replied, considering which sea I preferred now...since everything had changed.

  Jackson pulled off the main route and followed a dirt path down the cliff. At the end sat a hut. Or at least that was what it looked like to my eyes. A whitewash, wooden hut, its sign flapping in the wind with a single word scratched into it. Blacks.

  Jackson cut the engine and came around to open my door. "Okay, so it doesn't look much, but I promise it has the best coffee in a twenty-mile radius." He helped me out. His touch sent unfamiliar, forgotten sensations rippling through my body, and his hand stayed pressed on the small of my back as we walked into the hut together.

  The place might have looked like a beat down shack from the outside, but the inside painted a different story. It wasn't the simple wooden booths, the odd tables, or the single counter in front of a service hotplate. It was the walls. Some kind of memorabilia—newspaper cuttings, framed black and white photographs, box framed trinkets and souvenirs—decorated almost every piece of visible wall. The place was like the Aladdin’s cave of the history of Chastity Falls. My eyes strained to read some of the headlines, and more than once, I saw the name 'Donohue'. The detective in me was ready to scour over every piece of information, but now wasn't the time.

  An old man with dark wrinkled eyes and dark weathered skin greeted Jackson, pulling him into a hug, like old friends. When he looked up and caught my eye, he said, "And who here is this pretty lady?"

  Jackson cleared his throat and stuttered, "This is Ana. We have a couple of classes together. I-" He coughed, clearing his throat. "I promised her coffee."

  I peeked over at him through my lashes, sure that I could see evidence of him blushing a little. But I had to be wrong. Surely?

  The old man regarded me for a second before his thin lips upturned in a smile. "Welcome, Ana, classmate of Jackson. Any friend of Jax is a friend of mine. What can I get you, girl?"

  I scanned the handwritten menu board. It was simple: coffees, shakes, a few subs, and homemade pie. "I'll have a banana shake and a turkey sub, please."

  Jackson clutched his heart. "No coffee? Be still my beating heart."

  A small laugh escaped my lips, and I could feel the old man's eyes watching us. There was a hint of something in them... Sadness? Happiness? Wistfulness? I couldn't place the emotion.

  "Usual, Jax?"

  "Sure thing, Otis."

  Jackson led me to a booth in the corner of the small hut and waited until I was seated before taking the bench opposite me. "So, how do you like it?"

  "It isn't quite what I imagined, although I guess I just imagined a Costa coffee."

  He chuckled and I said, "It's great. So close to the sea. Otis seems nice."

  "He's as good as family; we go way back. Like me in diapers back. He knew my dad..." Jackson hesitated, fidgeting with the napkin in front of him. "Anyway, what about you, Ana Parry? What's your story?"

  My body went rigid, and my eyes darted away from the table. Away from Jackson. Noticing my change, he reached out across the table and took my hand in his. It was different to the couple of occasions when he had accidentally touched me. This was deliberate. Purposeful. And it calmed me, when I had expected the opposite. I expected his touch to cause me panic, or repulse me, or wind me. But it didn't. It felt... it felt nice.

  "My story? It’s far too boring for coffee with Shakespeare."

  He waited for me to continue, his green eyes burning into me, questioning me. When I didn't answer, he dropped it. I released the breath that I had been holding, thankful for the momentary reprieve.

  Otis brought over our drinks. Jackson's hot chocolate looked delicious with its foamy cream and marshmallows, but my banana milkshake looked good enough to eat, complete with a banana slice and sprinkles.

  After licking the cream off his spoon, Jackson said, "So, how do you like CFA?"

  I shrugged. "It's okay, I guess."

  Something flickered in his eyes, their emerald tone from earlier deepening to a dark green. "Not what you expected?"

  "You could say that. I was expecting quiet. I get the feeling it's anything but."

  The words lingered between us, and Jackson's face twisted with an unknown expression. The same expression he’d had back in class. He looked torn, like he wanted to say more, but didn't know if he should.

  Otis appeared again with our food, cutting the tension between us like a knife. We chatted about safe topics. Jackson gave me the five-minute rundown of the town. He was born and raised in Chastity Falls, which was pretty much comprised of the academy, a high school, police station, movie theatre, a couple of bars, and a handful of stores. I talked about my class schedule and Elena. He leaned into the table, really paying attention to my every word, but I noticed the way his eyes kept discreetly glancing at the door and checking his watch. I even caught the shared look between him and Otis. I didn't know why, but Jackson was on edge.

  After finishing my sub, I pushed the plate to one side and said, "So, is Dead Man's Cove around here? Elena mentioned a party."

  Jackson coughed, slamming his fist against his chest. "Ye- yeah. Not far from here," he stuttered, whipping his cap off and dragging a hand through his hair. "It's usually a bust, though. Probably a waste of time to make the trip, especially with the forecast."

  My stomach dipped and I wanted to take back my words. "Oh. So, you're not going? I thought it was some kind of freshman thing?"

  He glanced around the hut again. "Nah, I doubt it."

  Jackson didn't say anything else on the matter, and I didn't ask.

  As he paid the check and said goodbye to Otis, the sinking feeling in my stomach didn't leave. Something had changed between us and I didn't know what. Or why.

  "I have a couple of things to take care of in town, so I'll drop you back at campus?"

  "Sure."

  Jackson's voice was cold. It was as if the person I had arrived with was gone. I was so confused. He had pushed for coffee, not me, but now it was li
ke he couldn't wait to get rid of me.

  We drove back in stifling silence. A couple of times Jackson cursed under his breath, once when a rabbit ran out across the road and the other when a car passed us on the opposite side of the road. I kept my head turned to the window, watching dusk fall over the forest, only making it seem even more alien.

  Before I knew it, the car ground to a halt outside the front entrance of the campus. The main buildings were a good five-minute walk and McGinley at least another ten. Tiny drops of rain hit the windscreen and trickled down into oblivion. Perfect, what a shitty end to a shitty date. Coffee, I mean coffee. I pulled my hood up and reached for the door handle. "Thanks for the shake. See you in class."

  I didn't want to look back for fear of my face betraying me. So, I ducked out of the car in a hurry.

  "Ana, wait," Jackson's voice called. I turned to find the passenger window rolled down. "Thanks for coming. See you in class."

  I nodded and watched as he reversed, spun the car around, and sped off into the distance.

  There was definitely something up with this place.

  ~

  As I followed the stream of students into the auditorium, my weary eyes searched for Jackson. I had hardly slept, my dreams vivid and confusing. My own screams woke me, the sheets strewed around my trembling body. For once, luck was on my side and Elena hadn't returned to our dorm, so I escaped her third degree.

  I spotted him sitting next the redhead again and my heart sank. Not that I had expected anything else after the way he left me outside CFA after our coffee. But it didn't make seeing him with her any easier. It’s only what you deserve, the little voice scolded.

  Professor Gardner started his monotonous lecture. He was about as interesting as watching paint dry. Thirty minutes in and his voice became the drone it had three days before and I tuned out.

  My eyes flickered to Jackson. He was leaning forward slightly, his head dropped down like he was looking at something on the table or in his lap. Noticing, the redhead laid her head on his shoulder and snuggled against him, causing a pang of jealousy to shoot through me. They seemed close. Familiar. He didn't shrug her off but didn't encourage her either. He just kind of accepted that she was there.