* * *
“Would this one like to discuss what she just saw?” Shanvi asked Aly on the way back from walking Catty home that evening.
Aly shook her head.
“Again, he shall be fine, dearest. The lad’s wounds were severe, yet manageable. You are fortunate that Teacher is your sparring priest. He did quite well.”
Aly still didn’t say anything, and Shanvi was worried he’d have to monitor the Little One for trauma. Still, she looked okay. Beyond the initial shock, she and Catty both took the unexpected event remarkably well. So, he figured Aly was just in one of her more typical moods.
“Regardless, I hope you do not become fearful of such things like the Evaluations,” Shanvi said. “And what is more, that be a clear example of why being-control is not an issue to take lightly.”
“Very good, Pappai. Thus is why I am not worried.”
“Oh? How so?”
“If I may, have I not been training myself to avoid getting hit by a beam for years?”
Shanvi laughed and hugged the Little One. She was going to be fine, after all. Silence came between the two of them again, however, moments later.
“Then perhaps we best discuss something with a lighter note, yes?” the master said. “Why not school?”
“If I may, I would rather not.”
Shanvi swore in his head, frustrated that his sly attempt to make her open up about what was really bothering her failed. He always tried to get her to talk about her school problems, but she simply said she had other pressing things on the mind. And that was what worried him the most. What on Gooliun could possibly be so pressing for an eight-year-old that even the sight of a severely wounded boy wasn’t as important?
“Have the girls given this one any trouble again?”
“Nay, there be no trouble from them.”
Aly was a terrible liar, but Shanvi didn’t want to press the issue. He knew she was getting tired of it, probably more than he was.
“Good. Be that as it may, if I need to talk to Teacher or Master Slew, truly, just let me know.”
“Indeed I shall.” Aly’s tone still said otherwise. “And even if it were not, having you defend my case would only make matters worse.”
“Truly? I cannot see how.”
Of course you cannot, his Little One thought. Shanvi wondered if he was talking in circles, and it tore him apart. Why Aly couldn’t be straight with him, he had no clue. He thought the adolescent years were supposed to be the trying years.
“Beyond astronomy, did you learn anything else of interest?” he asked, seeing there wasn’t a point in forcing the mastra to talk about the bullying.
“We learned how to use past-tense verb usage in the Universal dialect a little more near the end of learning sessions. Beyond that, nay. I fear there was not much else.”
“I see. Then, what of sparring? Was that well?”
Shanvi watched Aly’s lips tighten. Her nostrils flared and he knew her palms were getting sweaty. She looked like she suddenly had the urge to hit something, anything. As long as it had a face, she’d more than likely break it.
“Actually,” Aly eventually said, steadily, “nay, I was slightly unsettled in that regard, to be honest.”
“Ah.” Finally. She could open up on something! Pappai to the rescue. “Very well, then. What be the matter?”
Aly messed with one of her tents. “I fear my being the lowest ranked in physical health has finally cost me dearly. For I was not permitted to take part in some of the workout routines with the class this afternoon.”
“Oh. I see. Yet I am sure Teacher explained to you why, yes? He spoke with Lord Quongun and I and described what he had to do. Apologies, dearest, yet that be the way of things.”
“And I shall abide by them without quarrel, as I am expected to do so.”
“Goodness. ‘Abide’ and ‘quarrel,’ you say. Your vocabulary is becoming quite articulate. Very well, then. You shall honor the rules, which I must applaud, yet I understand you must still feel some sense of disappointment, yes?”
Aly slowed down and nodded. “Be that as it may, I am more troubled by what Teacher told me. He was to say that perhaps I am not good or skilled enough to be a combatant.”
Shanvi placed a hand on Aly’s shoulder and pulled her in close. “Ah, thus I see what your issue be. You wonder why Teacher could say such a thing.”
“Precisely, Pappai.”
Shanvi felt trapped in a corner that didn’t provide an escape route. At such a fragile age as this, he knew his Little One didn’t necessarily need the reality of her possible limitations. It was a child’s obligation to dream.
Then again, he wasn’t sure what could be worse. Did he have to break Aly’s heart by opening her eyes to the truth of life – that people, in all actuality, were finite in their potential? Or should he lie to his very own daughter and let her think that she had control over all her desires, only so he could watch her slowly crumble under her own demise because he was too much of a coward to tell her otherwise? When was a parent supposed to lie in order to protect the child he loved, and tell the truth to give her unpleasant wisdom?
“Thus, why trouble yourself over one silly matter like sparring?” he said. “Truly, did this one not want to be a bakery priestess anyway? You shall be the best at that, instead, if you wish.”
Shanvi quickly looked away because Aly’s glare was too much to handle. The look spoke for itself. It told him how disappointed she was to think that he, her own pappai, didn’t even believe in her. It said he should’ve known how much harder she worked at being the best she could be not only for herself, but for the tribe, just as any honorable Goolian was supposed to. And in that instant, Shanvi knew he was the worst parent in the world.
“Very good, Pappai,” Aly said, crossing her arms since an unknown voice whispered that Shanvi was probably the one she needed to hit. “I shall just be a bakery priestess then.”
Aly was a terrible liar, but Shanvi knew that better than anyone else. Again, he didn’t press the issue. With all that had happened in those few hours, he wasn’t sure if he understood his child’s concerns anyway. Worse, maybe he didn’t know her at all.
And as Shanvi lost his confidence, he knew Aly’s was more assured. How dare he. How dare he and the rest of them say that no matter how hard she tried, it wouldn’t be enough. If that was how they felt, Aly would do everything possible, just to be the last one standing in the Evaluations, even if it killed her. She’ll show them. She’ll show them all.
* * *
Evaluations of the Tribe - Prossia Book 0 : A Coming of Age Space Opera Page 12