by Nicole Burr
Esra nodded, still bewildered as she stared at the woman with the long face and dimpled chin that reassembled her own. This was it. The moment Esra had been waiting for her whole life. And yet she wasn’t quite sure how she felt. The tension of anticipation and the sudden release as the moment arrived had overwhelmed her. She was ill-equipped to sort out her emotions for much smaller occasions, let alone something of this magnitude. Esra noticed that Talitha sat with her back in a rigidly straight line, and wondered if she always had such impeccable posture of if she too were nervous at their meeting. A brief look of uncertainty passed over her mother’s face as she continued.
“Adonis, your father, wanted nothing more than to be here, you see, but he was sent away on a matter of the greatest importance. It killed him that he had to go now, after almost twenty years of longing to see you. But you know all about the state of LeVara. Cane tells me you bring confirmation that Kiran Brae has been taken over by Tallen. It is unfortunate that our meeting must be under such disastrous circumstances. That is also why I was so upset that I was not here when you arrived. You must forgive me again for that, and for coming to see you at such a late hour when you should be resting.”
“No, it’s alright.” Esra sputtered, regaining some of her composure as she began to process the information. So that was her father’s name, Adonis. “To be honest, I was very nervous to meet ye and so tired I may have fainted.”
“I’m glad at least Cane was there to greet you,” Talitha sighed. “He is a wonderful man. That is one of the reasons we felt it bearable to leave you in Sorley, knowing your grandparents and Cane would be right there.”
“Why didn’t Tallen find me through Cane?”
“Cane was actually not his name before he moved to Sorley, he was known as Zariq. And he was able to maintain his secrecy with some cloaking and influence spells. It also helped that he was pretending to be an eccentric, removed old man, which is not so far from the truth.”
“How long has he been here at the Stronghold? How old is he? When did he become a Great Keeper?”
Talitha laughed at the steady barrage of questions. “Very long, very old, and also very long ago. So how is Meshok?”
“Ye know about Meshok? Did Cane, I mean, Zariq tell ye about her?” It was strange to think of Cane being anything except Cane.
“Not exactly. And don’t worry, Cane prefers his current name, so you needn’t refer to him as Zariq. Cane was the new name he chose for himself, which means “scholar”. Very fitting. Do you remember how you found Meshok on your eighteenth birthday? It was your father and I who had arranged for you to find her, as a gift. She was a pup from a Great Wolf that often stays near Adonis and I.”
Her mother got up and began pacing the floor, twisting her hands into the folds of her skirt. “We didn’t think we could do it, leave you like that. But I knew that it was for the best, that the Kingdom was in danger, and that to keep you with us would put everything at risk. Tallen would have stopped at nothing if he had found out there was a child. It is amazing he did not find out sooner. Only the last year has he had any suspicions. Luckily you had not been using any sorcery and Baelin was able to watch over you. All could have been forfeit, including your life. But your father and I gave up twenty years of our only child’s life, forced you to give that up. Please forgive me.”
The woman buried her face in her hands and Esra sank lower into the bed. The tension in the air was so distinct it seemed to reverberate throughout the room.
Esra thought long and hard about all the times she had wished for her parents, of the pain it had caused her. She was torn between accepting this woman and her sad tale and being angry that she was even being asked to consider accepting it. There had been no time to digest this information. Why couldn’t they have just tried harder? Fought to keep her no matter what? Who gives up their only daughter? Hot tears gathered in her eyes as she tried to control her frustration. Why couldn’t her childhood have been normal? Great Keepers and secret armies, it was all ridiculous. And they had lost so much time together. Could they now go on living like a family when so many secrets were in their past?
But a part of Esra knew that Talitha spoke the truth, or that at least they had done their best with what life had dealt them, which was an unfair situation for a young couple in love. She stared at the graceful woman who now stood in her room trembling with vulnerability. Esra decided that even though she didn’t understand everything just yet, she was willing to meet her mother half way to try and forge a relationship. She had many things to fight in the upcoming weeks. She did not want this to be one more of them.
“Even though it has been the most…shocking revelation of my life to know that ye are both alive, I can’t honestly say now that I regret the news. It may take a while to get used to all this, but I am going to try.”
Talitha stood for a moment longer as she wiped a tear from her cheek and kissed her daughter on the head. “Thank you. I had dared to hope you would not be entirely resentful, at least not for long. And you must assure me that if you ever feel uncomfortable or if things become too much for you to handle, please just let us know. Adonis and I cannot even begin to try to understand what you are feeling right now.”
“I must admit, to say all this was a surprise would be a vast understatement.”
“Yes, and I’m sorry we had to lie to you. But if you knew we were alive, would you have tried to come find us? Never given up until you had the truth?”
Esra thought about that for a moment. “Aye, I would have. I would have wanted answers. Besides, I’m not sure that thinking I was abandoned would have been much better than thinking ye were dead.”
“True,” her mother agreed sadly, taking a seat at the desk again. “I am so proud of you. You are in a new world now, one filled with magick and Keepers, Tallen, the Stronghold, the four races. Learning these things cannot be easy.”
“It hasn’t been,” Esra admitted. “I just worry that I will not be what ye need, that I will prove to be no more able at sorcery than Meshok. I don’t know what ye think I have been doing fer the past twenty years, but it has not been sword fighting or casting spells.”
“And that was just how we intended it to be,” Talitha leaned over to pat her hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry. You needn’t be anything besides yourself. I know that people may look up to you or expect certain things, but I will love you even if you decide to become a cook for the Great Hall. And we intend to defeat Tallen either way.”
“Trust me, ye do not want me anywhere near a cooking Fire.”
“Oh?” Talitha raised her eyebrows questioningly.
“Um…I’m a little clumsy,” Esra admitted shyly. “Actually a lot clumsy. And after seeing how gracefully ye carry yerself, I’m assuming I got this trait from my father?”
Her mother’s high pitched laughter trickled throughout the room. “Oh dear, I daresay you have. He can barely mount a Horse without a mild disaster.”
Esra pictured her own recent Skycatcher mounting encounters and smiled to herself in amusement.
“Well, I must let you get some rest,” Talitha declared, rising from her seat. “Your father will be here tomorrow for the celebration feast and you could probably sleep until dinner.”
Nervousness twitched again in Esra’s chest at the thought of her father. She tried to gain courage from this brief but promising reunion with her mother.
Pausing in the doorway, Talitha looked upon her daughter’s face for the first time in twenty years and tried to take every detail in. The thick, dark blonde hair that fell in wild cascading waves down her back. The pale skin and high cheeks, her thin lips which curved into an endearing smile, the soft blue eyes that would surely turn an incandescent color like the purest spring Water when they caught the light. The Great Keeper of Destiny decided right then that of all the wondrous things she had seen in her lifetime, this was by far the best.
XIX
As her mother predicted, Esra did not stir until well aft
er noonmeal the next day. She awoke momentarily confused by the strange smells and sights around her, then remembered that she had indeed made it to the Stronghold and was safe and sound in her new room. She would have probably been able to sleep for longer was she not driven by an intense hunger that forced her out of bed. After a quick visit to the washroom, she went to Nadia’s room to see if she was still there. A note on the door greeted her before she had a chance to knock.
Good afternoon Esra!
I slept late myself. I’m meeting with some of the other Keepers for a quick discussion about our journey and what Maeve has told us. If ye go around to the front of the main hall where ye saw Cane, there is another large dwelling to the left of it. In there is the Dining Hall. Come get something to eat when ye feel ready.
Nadia
Her growling stomach guided her towards the door without any further thought. Jogging down the porch stairs and over the lush Grass, she was once again taken aback by how vivid The Gardens were. She noticed the tangles of ivy whose vines enveloped a good portion of the dwellings, easing their shape into the green backdrop of Plants. Sprinkled between the dwellings were beautiful stone fountains that towered over Esra’s head, displaying Skycatchers, Birds, and many other Animals perched in threatening or regal positions. To her left was a towering carving of what she guessed was a Shendari, a subdued smile resting beneath the three small slits resembling a nose on their strange, flat face. Everything seemed to take on a renewed beauty in the bright light of day.
Esra thought then about her meeting with her mother and tried to determine her feelings about the situation. She always needed to make a concerted effort to sort through her emotions, as they were often confusing and convoluted. She could grasp intellectual concepts with ease, but judging her true mood was more difficult. Feeling the looseness in her shoulders and the absence of a knot in the back of her stomach was encouraging. Sorting through her mind was more difficult than reading the signs of stress in her body, but she knew the two were inextricably connected, so it was a good sign that she felt a release of physical stress. Esra tried to look into the depths of her being, organizing her feelings like she would a drawer full of mismatched goods. There didn’t appear to be any lingering deep resentment, but there was still a loose fog of apprehension hanging over her thoughts. She decided that it was a good first meeting overall, but that only time would tell if they would be able to have a true relationship. Her adaptability to change would help alleviate the transition but there was no guarantee. She would just have to wait and see.
In her musings, Esra barely noticed when she passed the place where Nadia said the Dining Hall was and had to double back to the large curved entryway. Passing through two grand double doors, she entered into a tall, luxurious foyer. To the right was a room that appeared to be a library, and on the left the foyer opened up into the Dining Hall. All the woodwork and various stone statues had elaborate carvings of every imaginable picture and symbol. Everywhere she looked, it was like an artist had imbued their craft over every inch of the room. The beautifully polished marble floors had varying colors of green, white, and grey, and shone like the surface of Water. Centered between the two rooms was a large stone fireplace in a deep green shade with curling grey accents. Looking up, she noticed that the underside of the Shendari scales which made up the roof looked just like the inside of an Oyster shell. The colors reflected in the Sun made the ceiling look as if there was a sky full of shimmering gemstones. The amount of time and skill it must have taken to make such things made her head spin.
Esra turned towards the now empty Dining Room, which contained five rows, each of which was five tables long. They weren’t kidding about liking the number five, she thought. The tables and chairs were made out of a wood so dark it was almost black. Esra had never seen such craftsmanship. No two chairs carried the same design, but yet they all seemed to complement each other. It was as if they were telling a story, from the beginning of time, for all of the races. Through their struggles and triumphs, until the creation of the Stronghold and the unity of the Kingdom. She noticed that the floors in here were almost exclusively light grey and purple, which brought out the color of the tables expertly. Once again, the light that reflected off of the high ceiling cast a mesmerizing glow over everything.
“Don’t worry, Es, I saved ye some.” A head popped out of one of the doors at the far back of the hall.
“Fynn!” She walked over to greet her friend, who was setting out a small feast for her at the end of one of the tables. “Thank goodness, I’m starved.”
“I thought ye might be,” he said, handing her a spoon. “Unfortunately we were all out of Brengard stew so I had te use Meshok. Gives new meaning te ‘Wolfing’ something down, doesn’t it?”
Fynn sat down in a chair across from her as Meshok ironically trotted in from the foyer.
“Oh no! My secret ingredient has escaped!” Fynn feigned distress as the Wolf yawned at him, circling the floor. Esra shook her head and laughed as she started in on the first dish, which seemed to be some type of broiled Fish. It tasted strange and light, almost as if the texture was but a figment of the imagination that dissolved upon hitting your tongue. It seemed to Esra that all her meals with her Assembly thus far had tasted as such. The Vegetables were hearty and full, but the meat was always lighter, almost like a dream. The flavor was real enough and fulfilling, but the weight of it was evasive.
“This is the false meat Nadia was talking about. She said that Keepers did not eat Animals, but rather were able to replicate meat by magick.”
“Aye, it is a strange thing, I know. But once ye become more familiar with our Laws, ye will understand why we do so. It’s a difficult piece of magick, one that took a Keeper decades to figure out. So how are ye finding yer new quarters?”
“They’re great,” Esra admitted sincerely. “Everything here is so unimaginably beautiful. And I’m glad to be rooming with Nadia, even though I’m sure everyone here is very nice.”
“Then I must say I’m quite jealous,” Fynn sighed, “because I have been attempting te be Nadia’s roommate fer more than a few Moons. She keeps refusing me, the stubborn beauty. Good thing I like te spy on people. And now that yer there, there’s twice the loveliness te violate with mine eyes. Ye don’t mind, do ye? ”
Esra laughed, choking on the piece of bread she had just bitten off. “Oh, Fynn. So what are the plans fer the day? I hear there is going to be a celebration feast tonight.”
“Did yer mother come te visit ye, then? I’ve never seen the woman so untied. She’s normally the most practical, graceful woman ye’ll ever lay eyes on. Besides my Nadia, of course. Now ye can see the similarities tween yer mum and yer grandparents, so orderly and composed. But Talitha was very nervous te meet ye, she was.”
“Yes, she came briefly. And I think it went fairly well. Or as well as it can go fer meeting someone ye thought was dead fer a couple of decades.”
“True,” Fynn conceded.
“What are yer parents like? Do ye have a family?”
“Aye, four sisters,” he smiled. “And I daresay my father was not a happy man when I left him alone with all them women.”
“Did some Keepers come to get ye?”
“Baelin, actually. He said that there were three already in his Assembly, including twin Elves, and that the Great Keeper of Destiny had a dream that I was te be the fourth.”
“What did ye say? I mean, did ye know that ye were going to be a Keeper?”
“Not in the least. My family and I lived in the far northeast Kingdom, in a small town near Bynthia. We were fairly poor, having five grown children and none of us yet married. The town we lived in was a poor one, so it was not something I was embarrassed about. My sisters were so scrawny that they were not much good fer working the fields, and my mother was sickly so she needed looking after. So it was up te my father and me te take care of most of the planting and harvesting. I have te admit, though, te say that I had an unusually strong affi
nity fer the fields would be a drastic understatement. Everything I touched seemed te grow twice its normal size and our crops were never less than overflowing despite long droughts or drowning rain. Many times it was the only way my family and the other townsfolk survived. It was normal fer our neighbors te come harvest portions of our crops fer storage. We didn’t mind, as it was just my father and I and otherwise the food would go te waste if there was no one te gather it. I had also become the official Herbalist of the town, giving cures fer sickness and relief from pains.
“As I was a Human and did not know much about the Keepers, the appearance of the Tur rash did not disturb me. It irritated me that I couldn’t cure the itchy mess, but I liked the challenge. When I began te hear the voices of the plow Horses I was brushing or the neighbor’s dog that I was petting, that was a different story. I went te the town elder te see if I was indeed going mad, but she could offer me no explanation except te wait and ‘see if I was summoned’. Of course, that cryptic answer did not sit well with me, especially when a few days later a seven foot tall Baelin appeared at my door. I remember sitting at my kitchen table, offering him a cup of my delicious brewed tea as he told me about the Stronghold and the Jade Gardens. I was fascinated, especially at his description of the Plants and Animals that I had never even heard of, let alone had the opportunity te see. But I knew that I could not leave my family or my town, that if I were gone the crops may not be enough te feed them. In fact, knowing that I had this skill with the Earth only proved te me how much I was needed there. So I thanked Baelin and told him that although I would love nothing more than te come with him, I could not.
“My parents, who had been not-so-secretly listening in the next room, burst in and said that it was nonsense, that they would find a way te make everything work, that I could be of more use elsewhere. That is one of the things I am always grateful fer, that my family taught me that no matter how little we had, there was love and happiness and we always had what was needed. We stood there arguing fer a few minutes until Baelin politely interrupted. He said that there were some spells he could cast te improve their crops and increase the yield of the harvests. Then he offered them livestock, enough fer three of our towns. He also said that the Stronghold would be happy te assist in any other way fer my services, and all they need do is ask and it would be taken care of. ”