by J. L. Drake
“Mmm, Cole,” she whispers, still half out of it. She tries to turn, but he stops her.
“Sleep, baby, I just need to be in you.” He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to control himself. She’s so warm. The moment he’s inside of her, nothing matters but her and him. He lies back down, positioning himself so he can stay inside of her as he drifts off.
Something soft brings him out of a dead sleep. Holy shit, it’s hot, wet…it feels amazing. A moan fills the room. His eyes are so heavy he can’t open them, so instead, he reaches out and grabs a fistful of her hair. Her hum vibrating down her tongue makes him buck his hips, pushing deeper. She sucks long and hard, then swirls around him like a cyclone. Three repetitions of that, and he’s jetting down the back of her throat. She doesn’t pull away, just continues until he’s finished.
Still trying to catch his breath, she climbs up next to him and tucks herself into his side.
“What was that?”
“Shh,” she whispers. “Go back to sleep.”
He grins, still euphoric from what she just did. “You’re never leaving this bed. You know that, right?”
“Okay,” she yawns, falling back to sleep.
The next time he opens his eyes, the bed is empty, and there’s no head between his legs. No, in fact, his bathroom door is shut, and he can hear her getting sick. The toilet flushes as he scrambles out of bed and across the cold wooden floor. He raises a hand to knock when he hears a bunch of pills hit the tile.
“Shoot,” she mutters.
He knocks gently. “You all right, baby?”
There’s a pause. “Yeah. I’ll be right out.”
The door opens after a minute. She’s pale, and her eyes are bloodshot.
Cole shakes his head and reaches for his cell phone. “I’m going to call Dr. Rice. You need to get looked at.”
“I saw my doctor three days ago,” she says as he reads a text from his phone. “Cole, umm…”
“Shit!” he curses as his phone vibrates in his hand, seeing Frank is coming to the house this morning. “I gotta get going.” He turns to look at her. “Savannah, promise me, call Dr. Rice.” His head’s spinning. He doesn’t want Frank to do this today.
Her face drops a little but quickly recovers. “Yeah, all right.” She smiles and reaches for her bag.
“I’m sorry.” He rubs his face and gives her a quick kiss on the lips. “I just worry about you.”
Savannah drops her eyes to his chest. “It’s fine, don’t worry. I will call. I’m going to go say hi to everyone, then I need to head back into town. I work tonight.”
“Don’t leave without saying goodbye. I don’t care if I’m busy. Interrupt, all right?” She nods but still won’t look at him, and he glances at the clock. “I need to get ready.”
Savannah
I watch him head into the bathroom then quickly dress as doubt creeps up on me. I can’t say anything; it would only bring him more stress.
Abigail is in the kitchen feeding Mark’s bottomless pit of a stomach. I slip onto the stool next to him and feel my pill kick in. The last thing I want is Abigail or Sue noticing my behavior is off and guess at the pregnancy.
“Hey, Savs.” Mark grins, holding a forkful of waffle. “Hungry?”
“Muh.” I reach for his wrist and steal the waffle off his fork. “So good.” I grin, and he glares at me.
“You dare come between me and my food?” He laughs, spearing another bunch and drenching it in syrup.
My jaw drops as I look over his shoulder. “Umm.” He turns to see what has my attention, and I snag his fork, jamming another mouthful of his waffle in my mouth.
“You went dick deep with that move, Savi. You just asked for it!” He pushes away from the island and wipes his mouth. “I’m going to give you a five-second start be—”
I don’t wait for the rest of the sentence. I take off and head toward the living room but see Cole coming down the stairs. “Cole!” I shriek, running over to him and laughing so hard I can barely breathe. “Help!” I wrap myself in his arms as Mark comes running over.
“Give her up, Logan.” Mark holds out his hand then rubs his forehead with a dramatic sigh, but I see the amusement in his eyes. “She stole my food, man.”
“You made it so easy.” I grin, holding Cole tighter.
Cole’s laugh makes me want to hear it again; it’s so playful and fun. “What do you plan to do to her?”
“The snowbank is looking mighty fine.” He smirks.
“You wouldn’t!” I turn to look up at Cole and give him the best bedroom eyes I can muster. “How much time do you have before Frank arrives?”
“Oh, you play dirty.” Mark lets out a loud ha and holds up his hands. “You owe me a cheesecake for this little stunt.”
“Deal.” I look up at Cole, who’s shaking his head at me. “What? You were going to hand me over.”
“Never.” He smacks my ass just as the doorbell rings. “I gotta go.”
“What does Frank want, anyway?” I ask, heading to the door with him.
He doesn’t answer as he opens the door and lets Frank inside.
“He’s close,” Frank says, then stops when he sees me. “Hello, Savannah.”
“He? Who’s close?” This may not be my business, but the look on Cole’s face is telling me it is.
Frank glances at Cole for help. “Let me talk to Frank, and once I know all the details, we’ll let you know what’s going on.” He steps forward and kisses me on the head. “Please, baby.” I nod, reluctant to step over anyone just because of who I’m dating. I know Cole is walking a thin line with having me in his life the way I am. But something doesn’t feel right.
I watch them walk off before I hear his voice from the living room. “Chocolate with a strawberry glaze.” Mark grins and tosses an apron at me. “And I’ll know if you made it with love or not.”
I roll my eyes and head to the kitchen.
Keith emerges just as the cheesecake is put in the fridge. He pinches the bridge of his nose. I’m guessing he’s tired from his late night of playing poker.
“Is Frank still here?” I ask, hoping he’s gone by now.
“Yes, still in the office.”
“Any idea what’s going on?”
“No.”
“And if you did?”
“Then I would know.” He smirks down at me, trying to be intimidating, but it doesn’t really work anymore. “You work tonight?”
“I do. May I borrow a car to get back to my apartment?”
He laughs. “I’ll drive you home.”
I pull out my cell phone. “You know I’m perfectly capable of driving myself back to town.” I send a quick text, and moments later Cole comes into the kitchen.
“You leaving?” he asks, nodding to Keith.
Keith leans against the counter with a devious grin “She wants to borrow a car to drive herself home.”
Cole puffs out a breath. “Sorry, baby, that wasn’t in the agreement.” I start to argue but see him rub the back of his neck roughly, and I decide it’s best not to.
“Fine,” I sigh, stepping up on my toes to give him a kiss goodbye. “Anything you wish to share?”
“Not yet,” he says, resting his chin on my head and holding me close. “I’ll call you later. I’ll stop by if I can.”
“I love you.” I’m teary-eyed. Sweet Jesus, Savi, grow a pair.
“Hey,” he says, pulling back to stare down at me, “what is going on with you?”
Keith leaves the kitchen, saying he’s going to get the car ready.
Frank walks into the kitchen with a phone to his ear. “Logan, round up Blackstone. José’s trying to get into Guatemala. Be ready in thirty.”
José! Everything around me starts to look funny. I step backward, feeling like I’m falling. Sounds are mixing together. I can’t separate them. I don’t feel Cole pull me to him, I just know he has me around the wrists, trying to get me to look at him. Mark appears, but his voice is funny, and black spo
ts mar my vision. Then, suddenly, everything comes rushing at me. I start to panic, my breathing erratic. This is my biggest fear. Cole going to fight. That’s why I got in the way with his plans to get recaptured last time. I wasn’t prepared for José to reappear.
“Savannah! Look at me.” Cole’s voice cuts through my panic. “It’s an easy trip, I promise. He’s alone, and we’re just going to pick him up and drop him off in Washington. It’s—”
“No.” I grip his sweater like he’s trying to get away from me. “Please, Cole, send someone else! Don’t leave me!” I’m crying now, and he goes blurry as my tears spill over. His eyes pop open with the fact I went from zero to ten in a matter of seconds. “If it’s such an easy trip, send someone else.”
“Baby, it’s going to be fine.” He lowers his voice to calm me, but it doesn’t work. I wiggle free, holding on to the counter. “Mark, please!” I turn to him for help. He looks so sad but doesn’t say anything.
“Ready!” John yells from the other room.
I want to puke. I want to scream. I want to crawl out of my own skin, I’m so frigging scared right now. A loud sob escapes me, and I grab my mouth in an attempt to contain the rest.
I’m losing it.
Mark holds up a hand to Paul, who is coming in the kitchen.
“Savi, you need to hear me. Everything is going to be fine.”
“Like last time? When you left and—” I hold my rolling stomach.
Cole takes a step closer. “I’ve been doing this a long time. What happened last time was—”
“Our baby needs a father, Cole!” I blurt. He freezes as his gaze drops to my hand holding my stomach.
“You’re…”
“Just over seven weeks,” I say softly, seeing his eyes crinkle in the corners, then a huge smile appears. He leaps forward and wraps me in his arms.
“Oh my god!” he whispers into my neck. “I love you, Savannah, I love you so damn much!”
Oh, hell, did I just admit I’m pregnant?
“Don’t leave me, Cole. I won’t be able to handle it, not now, not again!” I shake, unable to calm myself. I need to hear him say it.
“I’ll talk to Frank, see what I can do.” He pulls back, drying my cheeks with his thumbs.
We both turn when we hear Mark shuffling around, doing some kind of dance. Keith comes in, and his brows are squeezed together in confusion. “Fuck me sideways, brother! Hand it over. Fifty big ones! Damn! I have one hell of a horseshoe stuck up my ass.”
Keith’s jaw drops when he sees Cole’s hand on my stomach. “Really?” He beams. “I’m going to be an uncle?” He hugs me with a laugh. Then he turns to Mark. “The missus is pregnant. You know what that means?”
“Bubble wrap and a helmet,” Mark jokes, and Cole laughs.
“Means more trouble for all of us. You imagine if they have a girl? Another Savannah?”
Mark’s face falls. “Shit, we’re all screwed.”
I roll my eyes. “Right, so be nice, or I’ll sic our little one on you.”
Mark comes over and gives me a huge hug. “Congrats, Savi!”
“Thanks, Mark.” I sigh and try to get a handle on what I just spilled. “Let’s keep this between us right now.”
“Do I wanna be Uncle Mark? Or Uncle M?” Mark thinks aloud as he leans against the counter.
Frank returns, and Cole leads him into the living room. I take a seat on the stool as my head spins. What if Frank doesn’t agree to let him stay behind?
“Either way,” Mark says, setting a glass of water next to me, “we won’t be gone for more than fifteen hours.”
I sip the water and think this is how it’s going to be whenever he leaves. I’m always going to wonder if he’ll return to me and our baby.
“Frank’s team is going to step in and help out Blackstone,” Cole says, addressing Mark and Keith, then he looks at me, “since I’ll be staying behind this trip.”
I drop my head to the cool counter as the weight of the world rolls off my back. The men quickly leave, and the house becomes quiet. Cole walks them to the chopper pad, giving instructions. I stay inside. Taking a seat on the large sofa, I curl up under a blanket when I feel my ear being nuzzled by a little pink nose.
“Hey, big guy.” I reach up and pull Scoot onto my lap. He snuggles down into the fleece blanket with me and purrs a soothing rhythm. My eyes soon grow heavy, and I drift off.
Chapter Eight
Cole
Cole slips his phone into his pocket and heads into the living room where Savannah is lying on the couch. He lifts her legs and rests them on his lap then places his hand on her belly. “You awake?” he whispers.
“Mmmhmm.” She opens her heavy eyes. Scoot is not liking his nap being interrupted, and he shoots Cole a rather rude look.
“I spoke to your doctor,” he says, gently rubbing circles. “You’ve known for about four days?” She bites her lip, and her chest feels heavy. “Okay,” he sighs. “She tells me you need to be careful with stress. So, what happened earlier, is that going to be an issue every time I need to go away?”
She sits up, lowering Scoot to the ground, and pulls her knees up to her chest. He recognizes it as her defensive move, so they clearly have a bump in the road here. “Baby, I have to be able to do my job, but I have to know when I leave, you’re going to be okay with it too. Maybe you need to talk to the doc about this. Maybe—”
“Oh my god, Cole, no more doctors!” She stands and moves over to the fireplace, picking up a model car from the mantel. “I’m so tired of talking to people. Bottom line is you have no idea what it was like for me when you were taken.”
“Don’t I?” He leans forward and rests his arms on his legs. “If I recall, you pranced off to New York to find answers, only to get yourself taken. Seems to me I’d have an idea of what you went through.”
She puts down the car and whirls to face him. “Really? Did you see me held hostage, kneeling on the floor while a machete sliced through my neck? No. You were at most a day away from me, working on the actual hunt to get me back. I had to stay put and wait while everyone tiptoed around me, not wanting to stress me out.” Her voice drops a bit, and he sees a painful flinch flash across her face. “Not that it helped any.”
He sighs, knowing she’s still hurting from that day; they both are. “So, where does that leave us? I can’t not travel, Savannah. Blackstone is my life.” As soon as the words leave his mouth, he regrets them, and he sees her withdrawing. “I mean, it’s all I’ve had for so long, I’ve built my life around it. I can’t give up a family business just so you won’t worry. I could drive to town and be hit by a semi.”
She runs her hands through her hair and lets out a long breath. “I have to get to work.”
He stands and raises his hands. “Seriously?”
“Cole, it’s a little different, me working at a bar and you doing some crazy G.I. Joe manhunt for a guy who beats women within an inch of their lives and has killed men for looking at him the wrong way.”
“I don’t like you working when you’re pregnant, Savi.”
“Well, then, I guess we both don’t like each other working, but neither of us is going to stop, right?”
“Savannah…” His voice has an edge to it.
She grabs her bag then turns to look at him. Her face is so different. “I don’t want to fight with you, Cole. This is not how I saw this moment going. I think we both need space to think.”
He hurries to block her path. “Think about what, exactly?”
She drops her head and lets her hair make a curtain around her face. She takes a moment to gather herself, then looks up at him with red eyes. “Everything.”
“Ready?” Mike asks from the entryway.
“Yeah.” She waves. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Savi,” he barks, grabbing her hand and hauling her back to him, “don’t you dare find some reason to pull away from me. You can’t tell me you’re pregnant and then withdraw. I don’t know what’s goin
g on with you, but you better start talking soon. I’ll see you later tonight, so be prepared to talk then.” He grabs her face and kisses her. She fights it for a moment then gives in. He gives her belly a little pat before he lets her go.
“Mike, call me the moment you drop her off at home, and wait and drive her to work. I don’t want her walking in the snow,” he warns as she shakes her head toward the door.
“No problem, Logan, I will.” Mike smiles at her and offers to take her bag.
He watches them leave, then pulls out his phone to call Frank when June appears from the kitchen. Her smile tells him she knows about the baby. Good thing about June, she can keep a secret, even from Abigail, if need be. She comes to his side at the window and gives him a pat on the back.
“She’s scared, honey,” she says quietly, not looking at him. “It was truly horrific what she went through here. That poor woman shut down and wouldn’t let anyone in, but it’s how she survives. When she saw that video and then lost the baby all in a matter of minutes, oh, Lord, it was…” She puts her hand over her mouth and shakes her head. “It was a nightmare. It scarred her. She still isn’t right. I can see it in her eyes.”
Cole nods, knowing she’s right. “I can too. But I can’t not work, June. I just can’t. It’s what I do.”
“I know, Cole, and she does too, but I think this job is especially painful because it has to do with her. It’ll take some time, but she’ll come around. I bet you anything when you see her tonight, she’ll be better.”
He rubs his aching head, wishing he could just pack up her shit and move her back home. “Let’s hope.”
“Congratulations, by the way.” She smiles. “I promise I won’t breathe a word.”
“Thanks.” He lets himself think about the little one growing in her belly. “You think you could help me with something?”
“Anything.”
Savannah
I’m tired and just want to hibernate in my little apartment. All afternoon, I’ve felt like crap over my conversation with Cole. Never once did I plan to tell him I was pregnant and then get into an argument. Of course, I’d never ask him to leave the Blackstone team. It’s just with José, if anything happened to him, it would be my fault again. I feel like crying, but Jake bumps me in the hip, making me move so he can ring in his order.