by Jennifer Ann
“The cops are on their way, JD,” a deep voice says behind me. “Let them handle it.”
Then someone is pulling on my arm, dragging me away from the man.
Soon I find myself stumbling toward Sharlo’s body. There’s an earth-shattering howl that rips through the warm evening air as I fall to my knees at her side and take her limp body in my arms. So much blood…
“You shouldn’t move her!” a woman cries.
“Don’t even try stopping him,” someone tells her. “The ambulance said they’re five minutes out. She’s gonna be okay.”
Face pressed into her blood-soaked hair, my heart seizes when I can’t find her vanilla scent.
“Come on, Shar, wake up. You can’t leave me. Come on, baby, open those beautiful eyes.”
A string of meaningless words continue to fall from my lips as my heart rips in two.
“Why haven’t we heard anything?” I ask no one in particular, continuing to pace the tiled floor.
It’s been three fucking hours since we arrived, and we haven’t gotten a single fucking update. The antiseptic smell of the emergency room does nothing to calm my nerves. When I told the EMTs in the ambulance that Sharlo was pregnant, the already tense atmosphere in the claustrophobically small space became dire as they exchanged a worried glance. It was hard to miss the look of sympathy the female technician gave me.
“They’re focused on helping Shar right now,” Evelyn says in a gentle voice, setting her hand on my arm. “She’s going to be okay, JD.”
I jerk away from her with a flare of anger coiling inside my gut. “No one has told us she’s going to be okay.”
As she shrinks away from me into her husband’s arms, her eyes red and tired from crying, I kick myself for being a dick. She’s just as upset as I am, and she has every right to be.
When they wheeled Sharlo away for surgery, I was in a haze of shock and didn’t notice who all had joined me in the ER until the police came to question Sofia and then me before promising to keep us updated. They didn’t have much information other than the asshole’s name. I was too worked up to remember it two minutes afterwards and only recall them saying he was from California.
The place has been unnaturally quiet since we arrived. The only other patients to come through have been an old lady who fell, and a 10-year-old kid who had a firecracker go off in his hand. The lady’s elderly husband and a set of freaked-out parents are the only other people waiting, and they’ve each thrown me dozens of uneasy glances since they arrived. Nolan, Sofia, Evelyn, and Charlie look various stages of worried when I take a sweeping glance at each of them. I just want everyone to leave me the fuck alone.
“Can we get you something?” Charlie offers, rubbing Evelyn’s shoulder with one hand and tugging on his ratty old baseball cap with the other. He’s always so paranoid about being spotted in public, but I think he forgets he’s made my sister nearly as famous. “Maybe you should go to the bathroom and clean up.”
Glancing down at Sharlo’s dried blood covering my hands and shirt, I’m struck with another crippling wave of fear. The woman I love is fighting for her life, and I can’t do a goddamned thing about it. “Go back to the party,” I tell them all. “It’s what she’d want you to do.”
“I’m not leaving you here alone,” Evelyn insists, folding her arms over her stomach.
Charlie hugs her from behind. “And I’m not leaving her.”
A small sob comes from Sofia when she says, “It’s my fault she’s here. I can’t leave until I know she’s going to be okay.”
Nolan, sitting at her side in one of the plastic chairs, slings an arm around her shoulders. I almost do a double take when she leans into him, crying into his chest. Guess my stone-cold sister still has some feelings under that icy demeanor after all.
I still don’t fully understand what took place that had Sharlo chasing Sofia down the street or why the old man who hit her was blubbering about making some guy pay. Everything happened in a fucked-up blur, and my mind struggled to keep up. All I know is that I was listening to the band when I should've been looking for her sooner. I failed to protect my family.
“Shar’s dad booked a flight that leaves San Jose in a couple hours,” Evelyn reports, looking down at her phone. “It’ll be early morning before he gets here.”
Fucking-A. Can’t wait for that conversation. Sorry, sir, for getting your daughter knocked-up and then letting some drunk asshole almost succeed in killing her. I may as well tuck my balls between my legs right now and head back to Minnesota.
A severe-looking older woman in blue scrubs and a matching paper hat comes charging out of the swinging doors they took Sharlo through. From her washed out expression, it looks as if something drained her of all energy. “Nolan Zimmerman?” she asks in a grave tone.
My eyes dart over to Nolan as he rises to his feet. “That’s me.”
“Come with me, please,” she tells him, gesturing with her hand.
Nolan has started to grow on me since that day at the gym when he pulled me off Freddie, but I’m suddenly jealous he’s Sharlo’s go-to person. If anyone should have the right to know what going on, it’s the father of her child.
Nolan stops dead in his tracks, pointing my way. “He’s her fiancé.”
I’ll be damned. The white lie makes me want to hug the guy and even kiss his fucking cheek.
The woman’s lips tighten like someone who has sucked on a lemon. “You’re the only one listed as her emergency contact.”
“I just proposed to her this morning,” I blurt, all at once wishing the lie was true. Christ, I would’ve married her the minute I came back to the city had I known this shit was going to happen. When the woman gives me a skeptical look, I add, “Please. She’s everything to me.”
She gives in with a deep sigh. “Alright then. Both of you, come this way.”
Nolan hurries to my side, clapping me on the shoulder. “She’s gonna be okay, man.”
The boulder in my gut prevents me from answering. I’m on auto-pilot when we follow the woman into a small, sterile room with a set of chairs. The low buzz of the lights over our heads sets my teeth on edge. Is this the room where they break the news to families that their loved ones have died? I make a point of standing in front of the chair and crossing my arms, letting the woman know I have no intention of sitting.
“I’m Doctor Lewis, general surgeon,” she tells us with a small bob of her head. “Miss Rockford has suffered several serious injuries. She fractured her pelvis and her right femur. We operated on her leg, but her pelvis will simply take a considerable amount of time to heal with bed rest. We had to remove one of her kidneys that was punctured in the accident, although as you may know, it’s perfectly normal for a healthy adult to function with only one. We’re most concerned about the blood collecting between the layers of tissue that surround her brain.”
As the news sinks in, I swear to fuck the floor drops out from underneath me.
“The sudden blow to her head tore the blood vessels that run along the surface of her brain. It’s called an acute subdural hematoma. We put her in a medically induced coma to keep the pressure from increasing in her skull. We’ll have to monitor her closely with CTs to determine whether or not it’s necessary to operate in order to relieve the pressure.”
Nolan sets his hand on my shoulder and squeezes. “Are we talking brain surgery?” he asks.
“Like I said, we’ll have to monitor her condition closely before we make any decisions.”
“The baby…” I bite out, already knowing the answer before she speaks. If her pelvis was broken and her kidney had been punctured, the little guy wouldn’t stand a chance.
Looking me straight in the eye, the surgeon’s lips turn downward. “I’m sorry. There weren’t any heart tones when she arrived.”
Pulling in a sharp breath, my fingers curls into fists. Sharlo wasn’t on board with the motherhood thing in the beginning, but had started to change her mind in recent days. Just yester
day there was a glowing light in her eyes when she showed me an article online saying our baby was the size of a kumquat. If the blood pushing on her brain doesn’t kill her, the news that our baby is gone easily could.
When I turn to leave the room, Nolan says something and pats me on the back. The woman’s voice drones on as I stumble my way back out to the waiting area, almost colliding with Evelyn and Sofia.
“What’d she say?” Evelyn asks, digging her fingers into my arms.
The lump in my throat is too large to swallow, making it feel like I’ll choke to death before I can breath again. I push past my sisters, drawn to the exit by some invisible force. Shuffling through the dim-lit parking lot, I continue on without any idea what I’m doing or where I’m going.
We lost the baby.
If Sharlo doesn’t make it either…
My chest contracts so hard with the thought that I think I might be having a heart attack.
I’m a ways down the block when I hear the pounding of footsteps on the pavement behind me. Before long a hand grabs my shoulder. I whip around, ready to beat the living shit out of something or someone. Charlie ducks as I throw my fist, narrowly escaping the blow.
“Whoa! It’s me!”
The near-hit felt good. I don’t know how to deal with the dark emotions surging through my chest other than to hit it out with my fists. I look away from Charlie, unable to speak.
“Nolan told us,” he explains. “I’m sorry about the baby. I can’t fucking imagine what you’re feeling right now, man. If that was your sister in there…” He stops short, shaking his head. “Jesus, I can’t even think about it without wanting to bust something. Look, bro, I get it, you don’t want to talk. That’s cool with me. But Sharlo’s gonna need you to keep your shit together once she’s awake. And she is going to wake up because we both know that feisty woman is strong as hell.”
He grabs the back of my neck, waiting for me to look him in the eye. “She’s gonna be okay. You hear me?”
Clenching my jaw together, I feel a tear roll down my cheek.
Later I return from washing the blood off my hands in the men’s room to find Evelyn quietly snoring in Charlie’s lap and Sofia resting on Nolan’s shoulder. The rest of the small waiting room is empty. I don’t have a chance to sit before a nurse comes over. She’s young and pretty, probably just out of nursing school by a year or two.
“Are you James?” she asks. When I nod, her lips bend with a sincere smile. “They’ve moved your fiancée to ICU.”
“Can I see her now?” I ask, surprised by the sound of my voice cracking.
“I’m sorry, but visiting hours are over. You can see her first thing in the morning. In the meantime, go home and get some rest. Your fiancée has a long road ahead of her.” Then she spins around to leave.
A second later I’m hot on her trail down the hallway, unwilling to accept her answer.
“Where are you going?” Charlie calls after me. As a nurse’s station comes into view, he hurries to my side. “You heard what she said. They’re not going to let you bend their rules.”
“I’d like to see them stop me.”
He hangs back, grumbling to himself when I approach the nurse as she’s stepping behind the pod. When I clear my throat, her long, dark lashes flutter. “Did you need something?”
“I need to see her,” I grumble, running a hand over my head. Jesus, even my hair hurts. It feels like a week has passed since we were at my sister’s beach house and everything was okay. My bones ache worse than than after a fight from carrying so much stress. “I know you said it’s past visiting hours, but—”
Her head tilts and her lips curl with a smile that feels too condescending. “I’m sorry. Hospital policy—”
“I don’t give a shit about your fucking policy!” I snap. “I have to see her! Now!”
She holds her palms up and glances over her shoulder, probably looking for someone to back her up against the giant psycho. “Sir, please calm down or I’m going to have to call security.”
“That won’t be necessary,” Charlie butts in, stepping around me. Smiling, he sets both elbows on the desk to give her an eyeful of his inked sleeve, and removes his baseball hat. “He didn’t mean to snap at you,” he adds in a sappy voice. It only takes the woman a second of staring at his face before her mouth drops and she quietly gasps.
Normally I’ll throttle him for openly flirting with another woman, but he’s already working his magic. Batting her eyelashes, her smile grows. It reminds me of the way Ivy used to look at me when I was sparring in Cupp’s shed, only Charlie’s able to work his charm ten times faster. I’d be impressed if he wasn’t married to my sister.
“I’m sure it sucks you were scheduled to work on a holiday,” he continues. “It’s been an all-around shit day for my brother-in-law. The woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with was hit by a car. You can imagine how badly he wants to see her. Can you just look past the policy this one time? Neither of us would tell anyone if you were to bend it.”
The woman glances over her shoulder, licking her lips and twirling a strand of curly hair around her finger. Then she turns back to us and stands, leaning uncomfortably close to Charlie. If she makes it any more obvious how badly she wants him, I’m going to wake Evelyn and fill her in on the situation. “Let me take a picture with you and I’ll let him sneak in there, but he has to be gone when the next shift starts. I can’t lose my job over something like this.”
“Of course not,” Charlie says with another charming smile. “Thanks, sweetheart.”
“It’s Veronica,” she answers, giggling. Looking at me, she points to a door no more than thirty feet away. “She’s in there.”
“Want me to come with you?” Charlie asks.
“Go back to your wife,” I say. “I need to do this alone.” I catch Veronica pouting before I head off toward the room.
Stopping to brace myself, I purposely don’t look through the glass windows of Sharlo’s room. I know what I’m about to see could very well be the fucking end of me.
Chapter 21
JAMES
A small hand squeezes my shoulder, drawing me from a deep sleep.
“Hey, it’s me,” Evelyn whispers.
Bolting upright from the side of the bed, I wipe my exhausted face with both hands. My little sister stands at my side, her eyes heavy with worry.
I’m still in the chair at Sharlo’s side in the ICU room. Her chest rises and falls with the aid of the ventilator as machines blip and beep with her vitals. Seeing her unconscious, almost dead-like with half her body wrapped in bandages, did some weird shit to my head. Without a smile on her now pale lips or seeing her big blue eyes shining with mischief, it feels like her spirit has vacated, leaving an empty shell behind. I must’ve begged her for an hour to open her eyes and call me a “wanker” for not taking better care of her and our baby. I half expected her to sit up and laugh, confessing this was all some stupid fucking prank.
I must’ve passed out some time in the night while I was stroking the only spot on her arm free of road-rash. My body’s uncomfortably stiff, aching with worry from the day before. Evelyn looks equally exhausted, still wearing her wrinkled 4th of July clothes. At some point she took her long brown hair out of the handkerchief she was wearing and it sticks up around her head in a way that would’ve been comical before shit went down. Her weary eyes appear to see right through me when she speaks.
“The day nurse that checked in this morning wasn’t happy that you were here all night, but Charlie convinced her to let you stay. I think she was scared security wouldn’t be able to remove you anyway. I was surprised to find you still sleeping since they’ve checked in on her a few times in the last couple of hours.”
I clear my throat, still thick with sleep. “What time is it?”
“Almost seven.” The way she stares at Sharlo, face pale and lips quivering, I wonder if this is the first time she’s seen her friend since the accident. She looks ready to faint
when she reaches for my hand. “Her dad is here. You should come out and meet him, then give him some time alone with her.”
Pressing my lips together, I rub my sweating hands over my knees. It’s the moment of truth, the meeting I’d do anything to avoid. Looking and smelling like shit, I’m about to stand face-to-face with the first man to have Sharlo’s heart.
“Give me a minute,” I tell Evelyn, nodding.
When she nods back, tears spill from her eyes. “She’s going to get through this, JD. She’s too strong not to.”
“Yeah,” I answer quietly, wishing I felt as confident. With the sound of the door clicking shut behind my sister, I stand and press my lips to Sharlo’s forehead. “I won’t be far, little butterfly. You work on healing so we can start the rest of our life together.”
I try not to let it upset me when she doesn’t even so much as flinch in response. I try to hold my shit together as I shuffle out of the room, feeling like a traitor for turning my back on her when she needs me more than ever. I try like hell to convince myself I’m sweating like I just finished a match because it’s unnaturally hot in this hospital and not because I already know I won’t live up to Teddy Rockford’s standards.
What do I have to offer his daughter? He’ll know I don’t have the means to support the lifestyle he’s given her. He’ll know I’m a fucking failure for letting this happen to his daughter.
A man who could easily be in his late 40s paces beyond the nurse’s pod, rubbing and twisting his hands with his gaze locked on the tiled floor. His slacks and dress shirt are rumpled and there’s a dark suit coat draped over one arm. Based on his thick frame and light brown hair, I wouldn’t have picked him from a crowd as being Sharlo’s dad. Then his head jerks in my direction, and I’m looking into a very familiar pair of ocean-blue eyes, lit with pain and despair.
“James?” he grunts.
I actually consider bolting as he starts my way, jaw clenched and neck corded. Even though he’s fairly tall and looks to be in great shape, I still tower over him in height and width. But it’s not like I’m about to fight him if that’s what he needs to get past this. I deserve whatever retribution he feels a need to deliver in the name of his beautiful baby girl. The moment I’m convinced he’s going to deck me, his arms encircle around me and he claps my back.