This Broken Beautiful Thing

by Summers, Sophie

  “I seriously don’t know what the fuck your problem is! I stayed with Jesse and Anna knew about it?” I say moving away from him but he grabs my arm tightly.

  “Jace get your hands off me. Now.” I say through gritted teeth staring at his chest in front of me.

  “Jesse? You were with him this whole time? No one fucking told me! Why didn’t you tell me? I don’t want you with him. You don’t sleep next to anyone besides me, do you understand?” he roars once again, when I don’t answer he grabs my face and pulls it close to mine, “I said, Do. You. Understand. Me?” His voice is menacingly soft but still harsh, I can feel his breathe on my face.

  “Yes! I understand you! Okay?” I shout and shove him off me.

  He walks right past me and I stand there quietly as he leaves the room. The house is so quiet that I can even hear the shower as he turns it on. After ten minutes when the shower goes off I start to panic, I don’t want to have another screaming match with him. As I’m about to leave his room, he walks in zipping up his jeans, I avoid looking at his shiny muscular chest and turn to look out the window again.

  “Where’s everyone?” I say.

  “Your father had a meeting and Annalie went with him, the guys who didn’t go with are at home with their families.” he says and I hear the bed squeak as he sits on it.

  I don’t say anything but that doesn’t stop him from talking.

  “That shit you pulled last night can’t happen again, understand me?” he says again in that harsh tone.

  “What shit?” I say flatly knowing full well what he’s referring to.

  “Playing superwoman, hitting one of my brothers with a bat? It’s not on Harley, do that again and you will regret it. You may be Grimm’s kid but no one fucks with our boys… not even you.” he spits out. I feel smaller than I already am.

  “What I said last night I meant it, if I see “one of your boys” forcing themselves on someone that doesn’t want it, I won’t sit and watch. I don’t care whether you agree with it or not.” I walk closer to him and I know he’s already fuming by the way he clutches the bedding in his hands. I need to say these words to him, I need him to know I don’t agree with the way they treat woman.

  “Harley, I’m going to say this once and I’m not going to repeat myself. You will not do what you did last night again, do you hear me? You are a woman and you belong to this club but you need to know your place.” he says pulling me onto his lap so that I’m straddling him.

  I struggle to get off but he won’t budge as he holds me tightly against him. We are at eye level as I speak with venom.

  “What exactly is my place Jace?”

  “At my side…with me, I can only do that if you listen to what I say. I have to keep you safe, your father agrees with me. You don’t know how it is to be part of this life but I’m going to show you.” Jace says, his voice is softer and his hold on me loosens. He looks sad and exhausted, my heart hurts for him, melting away at the ice queen role I’m trying play. I want to wrap my arms around his much larger ones and comfort him.

  “My father agrees with the way you treat me?” I ask raising an eyebrow confused.

  “Yes, he trusts me with you and he knows I’m the best person to keep you safe. He knows what my intentions with you are.” He says looking down at my chest now very openly; the sleeve of my shirt hangs off once of my shoulders and the top of my pink bra is sticking out along with a lot of cleavage. I watch as he looks at my body lustfully and he bites his lip.

  “And what are your intentions Jace?”

  “I want you baby…all of you and I’m not going to let anyone stop me, not even you.” He looks up at me intensely.

  “Really Jace? You want me? Last night it looked like you wanted Rachelle? So which is it? And while we’re on the topic of her…” I bend down and put my lips near his ear. “Did she get to wear your colours last night Jace?”

  I let my lips linger near his neck. I feel his shoulders bouncing and laughter starts coming from his mouth. The idiot’s laughing at me.

  “Jealous baby?” he says pulling my head back to look into my eyes.

  “Oh shut up.” I push him down onto the bed and attempt to move off him but his hands go firmly on the undersides of my knees making sure I can’t move. I’m straddling his lap while he lies on the bed laughing at me. When I felt his arousal against me through his jeans I jump forward, I stop myself from falling into his chest by putting both hands on the bed next to his head. Now I’m leaning over him, his eyes on mine now more serious as he whispers, “Not jealous baby? Not at all?”

  I shake my head unable to move my eyes from his.

  “What if I had to tell you that I let her wear my patch...all... night… long? That it was worth what she did to me while people watched... that she suck-” I interrupt him by shoving one of my hands over his mouth and squeeze my eyes shut.

  “I don’t want to hear about it… I can’t.” I shake my head breathing heavy, full of sadness and jealousy.

  He manages to pull my hand away, I hear him say, “I knew it.” Suddenly his one hand grips my hair roughly and he tugs my head down to meet his. His lips are hard and forcing against mine, mine are equally determined as his. I’m lost in this nirvana he brings me, forgetting all he’s done.

  I turn my face from his but he continues to press his lips against my neck and collarbone, I say breathlessly, “Jace stop, I can’t do this. Not after you and Rach-”

  “No.” he says and goes back to kissing me.

  “No?” I’m confused.

  “No.” he repeats.

  “What do you mean, no?” I pull away from him again yet this time he rolls me over with him now looming above me. I push at his chest.

  “What are you saying Jace? I don’t understand? I’m telling you to stop. So Stop.” I push him again and he chuckles shaking his head then dives in for another kiss. I bite his lip and he flinches back, checking his lip if it’s bleeding and luckily it’s not.

  “No, as in I didn’t do shit with that whore. No, as in I’m not going to allow you to overthink this and no as in I’m not letting you throw away whatever is going on between us. It’s going to happen and no, I’m not getting off you. Now wrap those pretty little legs around me.” This time it’s me who grabs his hair and forces his lips to mine.

  He drops his body to mine and I wrap my legs around his hips like he asks, he pushes against me one more time and I moan into his mouth feeling his body move against mine. His tongue enters my mouth finding mine, he’s slow and gentle, caressing my tongue with each stroke. He moves his body against mine. After a few more minutes he pulls away and leans his forehead on mine letting out a deep breath, his minty breathe combines with mine.

  He moves away and pulls me with him so that I’m back to straddling his lap as he sits on the edge of the bed.

  “I was so worried about you last night baby, don’t ever do that to me again. I need you here Harley…I need you with me. Do you understand?” he whispers the last words and I know he wants me to answer. He looks miserable so I drop the wall I’ve been trying to keep up as I place my hands on either side of his face moving the damp hair from his eyes. I look into his eyes then I kiss his cheek. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold him. His chin rests on my shoulder and mine on his, I turn to whisper in his ear, squeezing him tight as I do this.

  “I understand Jace.”

  “I can’t sleep without you, I need you next to me…I told you I can’t sleep without you and you weren’t here last night. I was alone and I couldn’t sleep, I needed you … I missed you.” He says in a husky voice against my ear making me shiver.

  “I’m sorry Jace. I missed you too.” I pull from his embrace and look at his beautiful sparkling eyes, I turn my attention to his lips and give him a soft peck. When I release him and move off his body, I notice how dejected he looks but I need some distance before I do something I may regret…like make use of that bed he’s sitting on.

  “Where did you go with Jess
e last night?” he says as he clears his throat and gets comfortable on the bed, leaning his head against the pillows watching me.

  “He found me at the park and took me to his place. I stayed with him.” I say as I start looking inside my bag for clothes.

  “What?” his voice rises.

  “Jesse from the bar? I stayed with him at his apartment. I already told you this.” I repeat myself.

  I hear the bed squeak and hear his loud footsteps come up behind me, I ignore him and place my clothes on the desk in his room, then search for the medicine the doctor issued.

  “What do you mean you stayed there?” he asks again as if in disbelief.

  “Jace? Really? I’m not repeating myself a third time.” I say walking past him, he grabs my arm roughly.

  “You sleep in his bed?” he asks angrily glaring at me.

  I swallow down remembering that I did and I clearly remember him climbing in bed beside me. He held me most of the night. He clears his throat and raises an eyebrow.

  “Yeah. What’s your problem Jace? He’s gay.” I say brushing him off and attempt to get passed him again.

  “You sleep next to him?” he asks again flatly glaring at me. This part of Jace scares me, I can’t even bare to look at him in the eyes.

  “Jace…he’s gay.” I say admitting to him.

  “Fuck it Harley. I know he’s gay. Don’t mean shit to me. You sleep beside another man in his bed and that man isn’t me…we got a problem.” He turns and heads for the door, opens it…then stops and looks back at me then crushes me with his last parting words.

  “You carry on acting this way and I'ma treat you exactly how whores should be treated.” Then he walks out. I stand there frozen as I hear his fading footsteps down the stairs, the door slams and then I hear the rumble of his bike as he speeds away.

  I stand there completely numb, although my body is shaking I’m not sure whether its fear from how angry and terrifying Jace was or whether it’s the hurt that’s flowing through me from how he just spoke to me after he kissed me the way he did.

  I make my way to the shower with my clothes in hand. I wash my hair and body and sit under the hot water rubbing my tummy. I can’t believe how he spoke to me. I don’t deserve that. I can’t wait to get the furniture for my room, we need space and I need distance from him, even if it’s the room opposite his.

  After showering and dressing, I decide to do a load of washing; I only have a few clothes, not enough for a full load. I pick up clothes that are lying around the apartment, all of which is Jace’s since he throws his clothes wherever he tends to be during the moment.

  I do the washing and clean around the apartment trying to keep myself busy. I’m not used to this place being so empty and quiet. After folding the washing and placing all Jace’s folded clothes on his bed I hear a honking downstairs, looking out the window I spot the furniture delivery truck. I run down the stairs excitedly and show the guys which room to place all my things.

  After the guys have delivered and assembled everything, they leave. I make my bed and place all my clothes in my new drawers and cupboard. I fill the adjoined bathroom with all my toiletries thankful to have my own space.

  I lie back on my new bed and sink into the coziness of comfort.

  CHAPTER 12:

  I wake up to the sound of the loud bass coming from downstairs, I don’t feel well at all, my head is pounding and I’m nauseas. I’m usually only nauseas in the mornings so I really hope I’m not coming up with something. The windows are rattling and the floor vibrating beneath doesn’t help the headache. I look at my phone and see that it’s already after seven in the evening, I slept the day away.

  “Shit, I’m late for work.”

  I notice a text message from Anna and I open it:

  ANNA AT 01:36PM: Hey Babes, we’re still at the meeting, weather is bad this side and things are running late so we’ll be staying here tonight. Don’t worry about work, the Bar is closed tonight. Only a few of the boys will be there. Love you lots see tomorrow!

  HARLEY AT 07:47PM: Have a safe trip. Love you guys.

  I know I should type more but my head hurts so bad, I can’t even concentrate.

  I make my way to the bathroom and wash my face. I’m still wearing a pair of jeans and a Blink 182 band shirt. After washing my face, I make my way to the kitchen to see if I can’t find any headache tablets. Finding some in the cabinet, I take two and down them with cold water. I don’t take notice of the various people around the apartment but they take notice of me and say their hellos, I nod my head not in the mood to start conversation.

  I rest my head on my arms over the cold counter.

  “Decided to join us?” Hunter says in his deep voice.

  “Mmmhmm…”I mumble enjoying the coldness of the counter on my warm cheek.

  “You okay Princess?” he asks sounding more concerned.

  “Yeah…just a little dizzy, haven’t eating much today. I just need to get my medicine and I’ll be hundreds.” I stand up and look at his concerned face.

  “You want me to get you something to eat?” he asks seriously.

  “No thanks Hunter, I can do it. Thanks though.” I say and rub his arm as I walk passed him weakly.

  Making my way back to my room to get my medicine, I lean against the wall in the hallway as spots blur my vision. The door to one of the spare rooms is a little open and it’s a foot from where I’m standing, but I can see everything that’s happening.

  I see the body of a man sitting on the corner of the bed, his pants down to his ankles, I can’t see his face yet but I hear his grunting and the girls fake moaning. I watch as the girl between his legs bobs her head up and down in a rhythm. I see her face clearly now as she moves away and uses her hands before placing her mouth back on him and it’s the girl I defended last night, Rachelle. I stand there frozen as Jace’s face comes into view. He pushes the girls head down harder onto his manhood. I can’t stand there any longer as I run the rest of the way into the bathroom. It’s as if the entire Caleb situation is on re-run but this time I see it with my own eyes, I witnessed it. I was so stupid to think Jace was any better. I don’t have the energy for any of this.

  I’m disgusted in Jace and I’m regretting ever standing up for that girl or letting Jace ever touch me, I know we don’t have a relationship but the way he explained to me that I was his, I thought the feeling was mutual. I guess I am his but he isn’t mine and never will be. By the way he touched me and kissed me this morning I really thought he cared about me. “I’m so stupid. So stupid.” I say out loud.

  I continue to throw up even as I hear the door open and close behind me. Tears that shouldn’t be there are rolling down my cheeks and I want to tell whoever is behind me to go away but I can’t speak.

  “Here’s some water babe, I’ll go find Jace for you.” Hunter says placing a glass of water next to me on the counter.

  “No! Don’t!” I stutter through coughs. “I don’t want him near me.” I hear him as he lets out a huff.

  “He cares a lot for you Harley, I know it doesn’t seem like it but that’s just how we are. He cares about you, he just doesn’t know how to show you, I know he does though.” He says in a softer more soothing tone as he bends down next to me and leans against the door.

  “Getting the girl that I defended last night to suck him off shows that he cares about me? Well Damn…if-” I start to say sarcastically.

  “What?” Hunter interrupts me in disbelief. I throw up again and curse because this is so damn embarrassing. He continues to sit there calmly while my head is facing the toilet bowl. He doesn’t seem fazed at the fact that I’m throwing up, he doesn’t even seem disgusted.

  I finally get a break to breath and I quickly get the words out before I’m hunched over the toilet again. “Yeah…tell him next time he should shut the fucking door.”

  “I’m going to fucking kill him!” Hunter roars and steps up, ready to leave. I panic and quickly grab his pants above his knee, I
can’t see anything as I’m facing the toilet but I watch out of the corner of my eye, where my hand is holding onto his jeans.

  “No….don‘t go…Please.” I say through coughs, there’s nothing left in me to come out.

  He tenses but I don’t let go, his body relaxes and he leans into me. I flush the toilet and move my body from the toilet now panting, fully exhausted. He picks out a clean cloth from the cabinet and wets it then pulls me into his body as I’m sitting between his legs on the floor with my head and back against his chest. Slowly but soothingly he wipes my face clean.

  “I’m sorry Princess.” He says quietly.

  I let out a deep breath my whole body is weak and exhausted from getting sick but I find the words I need to say.

  “Don’t be sorry Hunter, you’re sitting here helping me. I guess I can’t even be mad at Jace for whatever’s he’s doing now.” I say sadly thinking that they’re probably hooking up by now.

  “We aren’t dating or anything, Jace only feels protective over me because of the accident and that. It’s cool, I’m good. I think it’s best if I just keep my distance from him for a while.” I say more trying to convince myself than him.

  I move my body from his and wash my face and brush my teeth. I’m still a bit shaky but I need to get out of here.

  “Thanks for everything Hunter, I know you don’t think I belong here and I promise you if I had somewhere else to go I would…I just don’t.” I say avoiding his eyes.

  “Princess, I said that because you are too good to be around people like us.” He chuckles, “But after the show you put on last night, I think you belong here just fine.” He laughs again remembering the events of last night.

  “You did good last night. Proud of you, you have balls hitting a dude as big as Tom Cat.” he chuckles again. “Don’t let anyone change that Princess, not even Jace.”

  He pulls me in for a quick hug and gives me a quick squeeze before releasing me. I smile at him and make our way out the bathroom.