by Desiree Holt
“She’ll be fine,” Tara reassured him. “You heard the doctor. You got her here in plenty of time; she’s got a full medical team taking care of her. Please stop beating yourself up. Children survive worse things.”
“I love her, Tara.” His eyes were bright with unshed tears, and the hand holding hers shook. “I love both of you. I’m going to spend the rest of my life showing you just how much.”
“Loving us is all we ever asked of you, you know.” Her voice was soft, and she squeezed the hand holding hers with what strength she had.
“What agony that woman put us all through.”
Even in her weakened condition, Tara found the strength to silently curse Maggie. “She wanted to strike back at you, hurt you the only way she knew how. She saw how much you loved Molly and knew that was where she could strike at you to cause the most pain.”
“How can I ever make it up to Molly?” He visibly fought the tears now, his throat muscle working reflexively.
“Children know things, Cole. They sense things. It will be fine. I promise you.”
Tara wanted to say something else, but she couldn’t make herself think straight any more. The nausea was coming in waves, swamping her and receding. She wished someone would come back with her test results so they could give her something to keep it at bay.
Cole, fidgeting in the chair, glanced through the curtain toward the door. “Can I leave you for a minute, sweetheart? Are you okay here? I’m sorry. I just have to know how she’s doing.”
“She’s doing fine.” Dr. Moreland came through the curtain before Cole could move. “She’s out of surgery and doing very nicely.” He made some notes on one of the charts he held. “She had no adverse reaction to the anesthetic, but she’s got quite a lot of stitches in that arm. I’d prefer to keep her for a couple of nights, just to monitor her and give her some IV antibiotics.”
“Of course,” Cole said, standing up. “Whatever’s best. Can we see her?”
“As soon as they get her set up. Right now, she’s in pediatric recovery, and I need to discuss with you where we’re going to put her.”
“I don’t understand.” Cole was instantly alert, ready to take command. “Is there some problem?”
“No. There are just a few other things we need to address.” He made one last note on the second chart then flipped it closed.
“What things? And what about my wife? What have you found out about her? Can’t you do something for her?” His voice rose as the worry he’d been battling surged to the forefront. “She’s had this virus or whatever you want to call it for five days now and doesn’t seem to be getting much better.”
The doctor nodded and opened the chart again. “Mrs. Cassidy, have you ever been told you have a major hormonal imbalance?”
“Yes, I know about that. I had a miscarriage several years ago, and my hormones haven’t been right since then. I used to take a low dose of birth control to try and straighten it out, but the pills made me sick. Why?”
“I’m sure that’s the reason you’re having such severe nausea. You don’t have the flu, my dear. You’re pregnant.”
Tara and Cole stared at him as if he’d grown an extra head.
“Pregnant?” Tara managed to croak. She had a sudden urge to laugh hysterically.
“Yes, your lab tests confirm it. About two months, I’d say. I always run the test before we medicate, just in case. Don’t want any problems, you know. But the hormone imbalance has exacerbated what we usually call morning sickness and also made you drowsier than normal. So.” He closed the chart and smiled at them. ”I’m assuming this is good news.”
Tara was the first to find her voice. “Yes, doctor, thank you.” She clung to Cole’s hand with a fierce grip. “It’s very good news.”
“You’ll need to see your own obstetrician as soon as possible. With your condition and history, you should be monitored carefully. Meanwhile I’m going to keep you for a couple of nights, too. You’re severely dehydrated from all the vomiting, and your blood pressure’s a little low. We discussed it and thought you might want your daughter set up in the room with you.”
Cole swallowed several times before he finally managed to speak, although his voice was barely recognizable. “Yes, we’d appreciate that very much. Thank you.”
“All right, then. The nurse will give you something for that nausea now, Mrs. Cassidy and set up an IV. Then they’ll come and get you as soon as the room is ready.” He shook hands with Cole and left the room.
Cole lowered himself back into the chair beside the bed, still clutching Tara’s hand, still unbelieving. The tears he’d been trying to hold back were now rolling down his face and his throat was so tight he couldn’t say anything. The look on his face made Tara’s heart ache.
“A baby,” he said. He was having trouble taking everything in. First the news about Molly. Now this. “I don’t deserve all this good fortune.” His voice was thick with emotion.
“I think everything was meant to happen the way it did.” Tara managed to summon a smile. “We are truly blessed.”
He raised his head, and they looked at each other, stunned by it all.
They were still trying to absorb it all when the nurse came in carrying a tray with several items on it.
“These shots should make you feel better real quick. And I’m going to start an IV drip, so we can get some fluids into your body. That will help a lot, too.”
Cole moved out of the way until the nurse was finished then he was back at Tara’s side in an instant. He laid his hand over her lower abdomen.
“That night right before our anniversary.” His voice was quiet, loving. “I knew there was something different when we made love. I swear that’s when it happened.”
“I think so, too. My periods have never been regular since the miscarriage so I didn’t suspect anything unusual. I just thought this was the flu,” Tara told him. “Everything happens for a purpose, you know. We can put the past behind us now once and for all. Life is good.” She grinned weakly. “And I’m even starting to feel a little better.”
“I love you so much, Tara.”
He leaned over to kiss her, wanting to hold her but afraid of dislodging something.
“Mr. Cassidy?” The nurse was at the curtain again. “You’re daughter’s doing fine. It will be just a few minutes now, and we’ll get both her and your wife upstairs. There’s a young lady out here in great distress, though, who wants to see you. Is it all right to bring her back here?”
“It must be Nicki,” Cole said. “Yes, please. Go and get her.”
It was a tear-stained and shaken Nicki, who appeared, with her mother behind her.
“I told her everything would be all right, but she’s been a wreck,” Mrs. Varner said.
Cole went to her and took her hands in his. “Nicki, if it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I was right there and wasn’t paying attention.”
Tara wished she could hug the unhappy, scared teenager. “Molly’s fine,” she told her. “Accidents happen. Please don’t keep blaming yourself. You take such good care of her. We trust you, honestly. And she’s doing fine. They’ve already finished stitching her up. They’ll keep her a couple of nights as a precaution, but I promise you she’s okay.”
Nicki burst into tears again. Cole looked at Tara helplessly then put his arm around Nicki and moved her over closer to his wife.
“You’d better pull yourself together because we’re really going to need you now,” Tara smiled, reaching for Nicki’s hand. “We’re going to have a baby.”
Nicki looked up through her tears. “Honest? A baby?”
“Yes and we need your help before it comes and afterwards. You’d better get in shape for this.”
“She was so worried you wouldn’t want her to sit anymore,” Mrs. Varner said. “I told her it’s all right. She should know about accidents. She and her brothers and sisters kept the emergency room in business when they were younger.”
When the orderly came t
o get Tara, Cole sent Nicki and her mother home. He walked along beside his wife, still clutching her hand, as they rolled her toward the elevator.
In minutes, Tara was settled in the hospital room, her IV checked and her vitals taken once more. When the nurse had finished with her, they rolled in a hospital crib with Molly in it. She looked so white and still both Tara and Cole panicked.
“She’s fine,” the nurse assured them. “She woke up from the anesthetic with no problem. She’s sleeping normally now. We’ll be checking on both of you throughout the night. Doctor wants regular reports. I’ll be back after a while.”
Cole stood at the crib, motionless, his eyes fixed on Molly. She looked so small, so fragile. Her dark curls were tousled around her pale face. Her left arm was bandaged from wrist to shoulder and an IV needle was taped to her right hand.
Why hadn’t he looked at her more closely before? Now he could see his own features stamped on her tiny face, only softer. He saw the same dark eyes and thick lashes, the same straight nose and high cheekbones. He’d been so blinded by anger and rage he’d seen nothing except his love for this child ripped from his heart by hateful words.
His eyes moved to Tara, drowsy from the medication, her eyes closing as she drifted off. What an incredible woman she was. He’d hired her as if employing a servant, and she’d stepped in where others would have fled. She was a loving mother to the daughter he’d refused to acknowledge, and she’d given her heart to him willingly, despite how little of himself he’d given back to her. When he’d turned to her for love, she had accepted him without reservation.
He thought agonizingly of all the time that had been wasted, time when he and Tara could have had a real relationship. Time he could have spent as Molly’s father. He was more fortunate now than any man had a right to be. He would spend the rest of his life making it up to both of them and to the new little life that he and Tara had created.
He watched them until he was sure they were both sleeping then tiptoed from the room to find a place to use his cell phone. He needed to call Jake and Lindsey as well as Tara’s parents. He was sure the McKees, in particular, had called the house and been worried when no one answered.
Ellen McKee burst into happy tears at the news then handed the phone to her husband who had a hard time controlling his own emotions. Jake and Lindsey could barely contain their excitement. Cole told everyone, when they asked, that they could check on his family in the morning. His family! What a nice ring that had to it.
Both Tara and Molly were still sleeping when he returned to the room. Torn between finding a place next to his daughter or his wife, he finally solved his problem by moving the crib even closer to Tara’s bed. Situating himself in the chair, he reached out one hand to touch Molly and placed the other on Tara’s arm. He sat for a long time, his heart so full he thought it would burst. At last, the specter of Maggie had been chased away.
* * * *
When Tara opened her eyes, light was pouring in through the window, the sun casting shadows against the wall. She turned her head and smiled at what she saw. Cole was slumped in the chair between the bed and the crib, rumpled and unshaven. One hand rested on her arm and one of his large fingers was clasped tightly in Molly’s tiny ones. The little girl was still sleeping, but Tara could see her breathing was even and regular and her color much better.
She shifted a little, and Cole came awake at once.
“Are you all right?” He lifted his hand from her arm and rubbed his eyes. “How do you feel?”
“Better, I think. How’s Molly?”
“Pretty good. She woke once during the night. I think her arm was bothering her, so they gave her some baby aspirin. That’s why she’s still sleeping now.”
“Not any more. Take a look.”
Molly had her eyes wide open and was trying to sit up. Cole bent over the crib and lifted her gently.
“They showed me how to hold her,” he explained. “The bandage on her arm is so big because they want to protect all the stitches. But they took out the IV early this morning, so she can move around better now. They took yours out, too. They said you were pretty well re-hydrated, and you could now take medication by mouth. They want another twenty-four hours, though, to see if you can keep food down.”
Cole settled Molly on his lap, taking care with her arm and showered her face with soft kisses. He couldn’t take his eyes away from her. He touched her hair, her cheeks, her tiny mouth, kissing her over and over again.
Molly, reveling in the attention, giggled and reached up to pat him with her good hand.
Tara felt tears gathering in her eyes and blinked them away.
“I called Lindsey and Jake and your folks,” Cole informed Tara. “And Sean. I figured Nicki’s mother would have passed the word on the Varner grapevine. And I didn’t want your folks to worry when we weren’t home, knowing you’d been sick.”
“Did you tell them we’re fine now?”
“Yes. They said they’d probably come by later today. I expect to see my partner and his wife this morning, though and maybe even Sean.”
A nurse’s aide bustled in, carrying a tray that she put on the bed table. “Breakfast for the ladies,” she called out. “Mrs. Cassidy, your orders say you should try some weak tea and dry toast. How’s the nausea this morning?”
“Much better,” Tara told her. “And I don’t feel quite so dizzy.” She didn’t. The room had settled around her, everything staying in one place even when she moved.
“Good.” This from the nurse entering the room. “Here’s your morning meds and baby aspirin for your daughter. She’ll need this for a few days until the worst of the soreness is gone. Doctor will send you home with some medication for the nausea, Mrs. Cassidy, but he wants you to see your obstetrician as soon as possible.”
“We’ll take care of it right away,” Cole stated, his voice firm.
“I’ll let you get started on your breakfast.” The nurse smiled at Molly. “I’d say you need a highchair to feed this little angel. I’ll send one in right away.”
Cole shook his head. “I’ll hold her on my lap and feed her.”
* * * *
The doctor had put a rush on the preliminary DNA test the night before, and the day seemed to drag by while they waited for the results.
“I’m convinced it’s positive,” Cole said at one point. “Not a doubt at this point.”
“Even if it’s not,” Tara pointed out, “it won’t make a difference.”
“It will be positive.” Cole’s voice was firm and confident. “I just know it.”
He helped Tara eat and fed Molly. Then, while Tara dozed, he held the child on his lap, crooning to her, until she, too, fell asleep. He knew he should put her back in the crib, but he couldn’t get enough of holding her.
The nurse arrived with the evening medication, and the doctor walked in right on her heels.
“First things first,” he said. “I have the results back on the preliminary DNA test.” He grinned. “Good thing you said cost didn’t matter because I think they charged through the nose to rush it. However, there’s no doubt you’re Molly’s father, Mr. Cassidy. I hope that pleases you.”
Cole could only nod, so gripped by emotion he couldn’t speak.
“Well, everyone seems fine here. I’ll just check my patients over, but I think both can go home tomorrow.”
Finished with his exam of mother and child, he made notes on the chart then told them he was writing discharge orders for the next day. He wanted the two of them there one more night, but they could all go home in the morning.
Cole collapsed back in the chair, still amazed by the turn their life had taken.
Tara, feeling immeasurably better, grinned at him. “Life sure is good, isn’t it, daddy?”
“Better than I deserve.” He leaned over and kissed his wife firmly on the lips then picked up Molly and sat back in the chair. Nestling the little girl against his chest, he reached for Tara’s hand and twined his fingers through
hers.
And that’s how they were, Cole feeding Molly and Tara sipping at her tea when Jake and Lindsey appeared in the doorway. Tara looked up and saw them and waved them in.
Lindsey came over to the side of the bed and hugged her. “Cole called last night,” she said.
“I figured he would. We’re fine. Honestly.”
“He told us the good news, too. Oh, Tara, we’re so very happy for you. For both of you. It’s a shame it took this kind of an emergency to turn things around, but I knew everything would work out sooner or later.”
“The best news is we had another DNA test done, and it proves without a doubt that Cole is Molly’s father.” Tara beamed.
“Oh, my god,” Lindsey gasped. “That is just too much.” She kissed her friends soundly, while Jake shook Cole’s free hand. Emotion was very thick in the room.
Tara turned her head and looked at Cole, cuddling his daughter. Then she looked at Jake, with his arm around Lindsey, glowing with her own pregnancy. Two of the best friends in the world.
Their marriage might have begun as a bargain, but it had certainly turned out to be a good one for both of them. Tara touched her abdomen where the baby was growing, the child she and Cole had conceived with their love. A new home, a new child and a new life.
And she smiled.
Epilogue
The scene could have come straight from a painting. The blue Texas sky, dotted with puffs of cloud, was a backdrop for a golden sun. A soft breeze fluttered the leaves on the oaks and sycamore and drew ripples in the little stream. Next to the barn, in a paddock fenced with white split rails, four horses nickered gently as they nuzzled one another. The aroma of hay and horseflesh drifted on the air.