by Lucy Clark
An hour later Hayden stirred and they continued to swap every few hours to ensure they stayed refreshed. As night began to fall, weariness began to set in. Hayden was driving the last leg as he knew the way to his parents’ house.
‘Talk to me, Annie. Keep me alert.’
‘OK.’ She thought for a moment before asking quietly, ‘Who was driving your car when it was in the accident?’
‘Interesting topic of conversation.’
‘I did warn you I had some probing questions. Are you going to answer them?’
It was a test and he knew it. ‘My ex-wife,’ he replied eventually.
‘She had this car?’
‘For a while.’
‘I was under the impression the two of you had been divorced for quite some time now.’
‘Almost eight years.’
‘And you still have contact?’
‘Let’s just say she…borrowed it, without my permission, while I was overseas at a conference before Christmas.’
‘She stole it?’
‘Yes but not technically. She still had a key and…I didn’t press charges.’
‘So she stole your car and then smashed it?’
‘Yes.’
‘Was she hurt?’
‘No.’
‘Were you?’ Annie shifted in her chair to look at him.
He was silent for a moment and she wondered if she’d pushed too far, too fast.
‘I wasn’t in the car.’
‘Don’t be obtuse, Hayden.’
‘Her…vindictiveness hurt, yes.’
‘Will you tell me about her?’
‘Why the sudden interest?’
‘It’s not sudden, Hayden. These questions and a lot more have been buzzing around in my mind for a while.’ When he didn’t say anything, she took a deep breath and plunged right in. ‘There’s something…amazing happening between us, Hayden, and denying it or saying that we’re going to be just good friends is ridiculous.’
‘I suppose you want to know about my daughter as well.’ His tone was indignant.
‘Yes.’
‘Why? Why can’t we leave it in the past?’
‘There are some things that can’t be left there if you’re going to get on with your life.’
‘I’m alive, aren’t I? I’ve continued to live.’
‘Are you really living, or merely existing?’ she asked. She knew she had him riled now and was sorry because she hadn’t meant to. ‘I’m not criticising,’ she added hastily.
‘No?’
‘No. Our pasts make us who we are today. It’s what we do with that knowledge, that emotion, that experience, which counts.’ The knuckles of his hands were almost white as they gripped the wheel. ‘I know you feel as though I’m criticising you, but I’m not. Honestly.’ She shifted uncomfortably in her seat and sighed. ‘I’m actually criticising myself.’
‘Meaning?’
‘Meaning we all have our problems. I haven’t had the best life but it’s something I try to figure out, without dwelling on it, and make the best of. I’ve been unlucky in love more times than I care to admit but, still, I keep coming back for more. I need my head read.’ She mumbled the last but he heard.
‘So why do you?’
‘Keep coming back? It’s not a choice. I met you, didn’t I? I didn’t ask for this attraction to be there between us, but it is, Hayden. The point is, I’m trying to make the most out of my life.’
‘And if you don’t end up getting married?’
‘Then I don’t end up getting married.’
‘Wouldn’t that break your heart?’
‘Yes, but I know the people around who love me would help me through. Look, sorry to sound all philosophical and all that, but as far as I’m concerned, we’re all just a dash.’
‘Just a what?’
‘Just a dash. You know, on tombstones there’s the date you were born, then a dash and then the date you died. Life is that dash, Hayden, and I want to make sure it means something.’
Hayden turned right off the main road and into a suburban street. He turned left, then right and Annie felt herself calming down. He slowed and indicated, bringing the car to a stop in a tree-lined driveway outside a double-storey colonial home.
He cut the engine, undid his seat belt and turned to face her. Annie held her breath, desperately trying to gauge his mood, but it was dark and she could hardly see his face.
‘I’ve heard what you’ve said and…maybe I do need to open up. It’s just not something I’m good at.’ He reached over and stroked a finger down her cheek. ‘You’re right, Annie. There is something…unique between us.’ He cupped her face and urged her closer.
Her breathing increased and she leaned towards him, the seat belt stopping her. She quickly undid it and tilted her head back to accept his lips. The anticipation of their warmth, the trembling she would feel, the way his fingers would tighten imperceptibly in her hair…Everything. She wanted it all and she wanted it now.
She closed her eyes, her impatience growing with each passing second, and just as his mouth brushed lightly across hers he jerked back, severing the contact immediately. She opened her eyes and gazed out into the darkness of the car. ‘Hayden?’ she whispered, and then heard his door shut. He’d left?
Then she heard voices outside and realised his mother had come out to greet them. Annie closed her eyes and took a deep breath before climbing out of the car, a smile pasted in place.
‘Welcome, dear. I’m Eloise, Hayden’s mother.’
‘Mum, this is Annie Beresford, a colleague of mine.’
Eloise took one of Annie’s hands in her hers and squeezed it affectionately. ‘We’re delighted to have you. Come along inside and meet the rest of the family.’
The Robinson family had stayed up specifically to welcome them, and after a cool drink Annie pleaded fatigue and Eloise showed her to her room. After calling Natasha to let her know they’d arrived safely, Annie tried to settle down.
She’d been instantly envious of the close family atmosphere, never having experienced it herself. Her father was a workaholic and her stepmother was definitely not interested in anything other than what Annie’s father’s money could buy.
Here, although she admired the way the Robinsons had stayed up to greet one of their own, it made her feel like an outsider. Not wanting to intrude, she lay awake for at least the next hour, listening to the muted sounds of the family below.
What if she didn’t end up marrying and having a family of her own? It was a valid question and one she’d tried hard not to consider. She guessed she would survive…somehow. She drifted into a restless sleep, positive she could actually hear her biological clock ticking.
Annie opened her eyes to the brilliance of morning sunshine peeking through the lacy curtains around the window. She frowned, wondering when she’d hung lacy curtains. They certainly weren’t her style.
Slowly she eased herself up and glanced around the room, realising it wasn’t her apartment. She was sleeping in one of Hayden’s sisters’ bedrooms at his parents’ house. Annie flopped back onto the pillow for a moment, closing her eyes.
Knowing she couldn’t sleep any longer, Annie climbed out of the fussy pink single bed and walked over to her bag. She’d been shown last night where the bathroom was, and as the clock beside the bed said it was just before six, Annie thought she’d take the opportunity to use the bath room before other people woke. She had no idea how many guests were in the house but guaranteed, with the wedding today, the bathroom would soon be in high demand.
As she took out a fresh set of lacy underwear she remembered it was her birthday. Not just any birthday, but her fortieth. ‘Happy birthday,’ she whispered, and then laughed at how forlorn she sounded.
She had hoped that spending the day with Hayden would be a good present to herself, but after their discussion in the car and how she’d pressured him she wasn’t sure what type of greeting she’d get from him this morning.
�
��One way to find out,’ she mumbled, as she pulled out a short skirt and singlet top. The humidity in Sydney had been stifling last night, worse than she’d thought. She wanted to get out, go for a walk to clear her head before the rest of the day progressed.
She crept across the hall to the bathroom, locking the door after her, and proceeded to shower. Afterwards she towelled herself dry and had just finished putting on her underwear when a door opened and Hayden walked in, wearing only a pair of boxer shorts, rubbing his eyes.
‘Hayden!’
His eyes snapped open, his hand dropped back to his side as he stared at Annie. She was vainly trying to clutch her clothes in front of her but as neither garment was long, they didn’t hide much. He could still see her russet red lacy underwear quite clearly, as well as the rest of her gorgeous figure.
‘Hayden!’ she said again, momentarily glancing behind her at the door she’d come through from the hall.
‘Uh…there are two doors.’ He motioned to the one he’d just come through. ‘One off the hallway so the girls had access and one from my bedroom. Weird remodelling project my father did,’ he explained vaguely, and then yawned. ‘Sorry. I didn’t know you were in here.’
When he didn’t move, she said forcefully, ‘Well, would you mind leaving so I can finish getting dressed?’
‘Uh…sure.’ He spun around and went back the way he’d come. Annie stared at his retreating frame, her fingers itching to smooth themselves over his gorgeous naked torso. As he shut the door she forced herself to take a few deep breaths, knowing that without them there was no way she’d be able to finish dressing.
A minute later she was more suitably clothed and had combed her hair. She gathered up her belongings and knocked on the door Hayden had disappeared through. ‘I’m finished,’ she called, and waited for his reply. Nothing.
Slowly she opened the door and peered into his bedroom. He’d opened the curtains and sunlight seemed to be flooding in from all angles. He was lying on his stomach with his pillow over his head. Should she disturb him? If she didn’t, he might think she was still using the bathroom.
‘Hayden?’
He threw the pillow off and sat up in one swift motion. He stared at her, his eyes dark pools of desire. She felt her breath catch in her throat and tingles slide up and down her spine. Neither of them seemed capable of moving, both trapped by the invisible bonds which were binding them closer and closer together.
Annie’s heart rate increased. Her lips parted to allow the rush of breath to escape. Her head started feeling light as she tried to hold firmly to reality. Say something, her brain demanded. She swallowed, slipped her tongue between her lips in order to help her throat and vocal cords to work smoothly. But as she was about to speak Hayden merely groaned and closed his eyes.
It was then Annie noticed his hands were clenched into tight fists, that every muscle in his body was taut, and she knew she either had to get out of there or do something to relax him.
She hesitated.
‘Go, Annie,’ he ground out between clenched teeth. ‘Just go.’
Annie did as she was told and headed back into the bathroom, closing the door firmly behind her. She headed to the other door, fumbling with the lock but finally managing to get back to the safety of her room.
She dumped her PJs and towel onto the floor, burying her face in her hands, forcing herself to take deep, calming breaths. She shouldn’t have come—was the first thought that entered her head. She shouldn’t have allowed Hayden to bring her into the bosom of his family.
She shook her head, realising it wasn’t a matter of should or shouldn’t. She was drawn to Hayden. She needed to be near him. If he’d asked her to go to Timbuktu on a camel, wearing a superhero costume, she would have done so.
Her hands dropped back to her sides as she stalked over to the mirror. The eyes that looked back at her were wild with repressed passion, repressed hunger…and repressed love. How could she have been so careless?
Sure, she knew the infatuation had definitely started, but she’d thought she’d been able to control it—the long, painless slide into love. Now, though, it needed no more control, neither was it painless. She was already slap-bang in the middle of it and it was tearing her apart.
She was in love with Hayden Robinson.
The air in the room became more stifling than before and, after quickly pulling on her running shoes and hat, she lunged for the door. Quietly she opened it and peered around. The coast was clear. Silently she went down the stairs and was soon out the front door, trying not to sprint down the footpath.
By the time Annie returned an hour later, the house was well and truly awake. Hayden’s mother was surprised she’d been out so early but then reminisced that Hayden was exactly the same. There was no sign of her son as Eloise ushered Annie into the kitchen.
‘Sit down, dear, and let me get you some breakfast.’
‘How’s the bride this morning?’ Annie asked politely.
‘Jittery.’ Eloise laughed. ‘Just like her sisters were when they got married. In honour of the occasion I’m making fresh pancakes, so how many would you like, dear?’
‘One’s fine, thank you.’
‘There’s also nice, warm croissants in that basket on the table. Help yourself.’
‘Thank you.’ The table had been set as though it were a restaurant.
‘Coffee?’ Eloise asked her.
‘I’ll get it, Mum.’ Hayden walked into the room and kissed his mother’s cheek. ‘Good morning, mother of the bride.’
Eloise giggled and then sighed wistfully. ‘This will be the last time I get called that. Mother of the bride.’
Hayden poured two cups of black coffee and carried them to the table. He sat down next to Annie and smiled. ‘Just what you need. A nice, hot mug of real coffee.’
‘Oh, you don’t drink that instant stuff at home, do you, Annie?’ Eloise asked in alarm.
‘I’m afraid she does, Mum,’ Hayden replied, and reached for a croissant.
‘Well, buy her a real coffee-maker, Hayden…unless you’re planning to share yours with her on a permanent basis?’ Eloise looked so hopeful Annie almost laughed.
Hayden chuckled. ‘Let’s get Rowena’s wedding out the way before you start planning mine.’
‘Well, you didn’t give me the opportunity to be the mother of the groom so why shouldn’t I plan your wedding? Fancy eloping. Annie, don’t you dare let him elope again or I won’t be held responsible for my actions.’
‘Did you enjoy your run?’ Hayden asked, trying to deflect his mother.
He must have seen her leave the house. ‘Ah…no. It was too humid to run and as I’d just had a shower…’ She faltered, remembering the burning desire she’d seen in his eyes. By the look of him, he was remembering as well. Annie cleared her throat, conscious of the fact that Eloise was listening to their conversation. ‘Uh…so I went for a walk. There’s a nice little park down the road. Had a seat under a tree all to myself.’
‘Yes, it is a lovely little park, dear.’ Eloise chattered on about how her children used to play there when they were younger. ‘Then there was the time Hayden broke his arm. How old were you, dear?’
‘Fifteen.’
‘I couldn’t believe he’d been so careless.’
‘What happened?’ Annie smiled at him, delighted to watch him squirm a little.
‘He fell out of a tree!’ Eloise hooted with delight. ‘Fifteen years old, had been climbing trees for years, and then—snap, the branch broke and down he came.’ A call coming from upstairs had Eloise rushing out of the kitchen to see what was wrong.
Annie laughed. ‘Don’t be embarrassed. I broke my nose when I was fifteen.’
Hayden reached out and gently ran his finger down the small, bumpy contour of her nose. ‘That’s right. I remember you saying something about that before. How did it happen?’
‘I was protecting Monty’s honour.’
‘Brenton?’ Hayden smiled. ‘I’d hardly
think he’d need protecting.’
‘Don’t you believe it. He went to an exclusive boys’ school and I went to the girls’. We had mixers every now and then and that’s where we first met. There was nothing—no spark or anything—between us from the start and we became friends.’
Hayden had guessed as much and he was surprised at the relief he felt to hear her say it.
‘Anyway, Valma Tucker, a…vindictive—for want of a better word—girl, started mouthing off about how Monty was trying to pressure her into sleeping with him. I was stunned and appalled so asked him straight out if it was true. He vehemently denied it. I then found out she was only trying to make her current boyfriend jealous. She was smearing my friend’s reputation just to tug at the heartstrings of some bozo.
‘It all came to a very exciting climax at one of the mixers where she spouted those rumours to a bunch of girls who were interested in Monty. Well, I’m sorry but I take my responsibility to my friends seriously and stood up for him.’
‘What did you do?’
‘I gave her a piece of my mind. She retaliated by connecting her fist with my nose.’
Hayden chuckled. ‘Did you get into trouble?’
‘Suspended for two weeks for fighting.’
‘But she hit you.’
‘She hit me first,’ Annie replied.
Hayden let out a burst of his amazed laughter. ‘You didn’t.’
‘I did. She had the biggest shiner of a black eye for weeks. It was worth it.’
‘And Brenton? What did he do?’
Annie’s smile mellowed. ‘He’s given me the gift of his unfailing friendship for the past twenty-five years.’
Hayden reached out and squeezed her hand. ‘You’re quite a woman, Annie Beresford.’ Their gazes held and she sighed with longing. Hayden looked down at their hands before slowly pulling away. ‘By the way, I’ve been meaning to ask you. Why do you call him Monty?’
‘Brenton James Montague Worthington the third!’