It had been years since she’d thought of the young man who’d been a patient during her internship, and remembering it now made her all that more determined to do whatever it took to keep Tucker from what had happened to Jeff.
She took a deep breath, certain he would rebuke her for her effort, but she had to try. “Are you willing to give therapy a try again?”
That got his attention. “Why?”
“Why do you think? Do you understand that without it, you could lose the use of your leg?” Memories swamped her, only making her more determined to help him.
“I’m not going back to the VA.”
“The VA isn’t the only place.”
“There aren’t any physical therapists in Desperation, so how do you propose I go about it?”
“I’ll check around, if you’ll agree to see it through.”
His laugh was cold and without humor. “Considering how packed that waiting room was, I’m sure you have all the time in the world.”
His sarcasm stung, but she ignored it. “I have some free time.”
He was silent for a moment while he stared at her. “Helping out a cripple, huh?”
It was like a slap in the face, but instead of wrapping her arms around herself, she shrugged. “If that’s how you feel, forget I offered.”
“I will.” He turned the doorknob and jerked the door open.
“Do you think the only person you’re hurting is yourself?” she asked, keeping her voice low.
“I’m not hurting you, that’s for sure.”
“You’re hurting your family. Don’t you care?”
“I hardly know my family.” There was bitterness in his voice, but he made the mistake of glancing at her, and his eyes betrayed him.
He’d taken one step out the door when she spoke. “And what about your son?”
The question stopped him in his tracks. Turning back, his cold gaze met hers. “Thanks for the prescription.”
Before she could say anything else, he was out of the room, and she watched him walk down the hallway to the waiting room. She’d heard war was hell, and Tucker O’Brien was living proof of it.
“DID YOU SEE THE DOCTOR?” Jules O’Brien asked as she set the table on the patio for dinner.
Tucker had been trying to think of how he could help, but his sister-in-law’s question left him staring at her. Nobody could read him so well, except for his sister, Nikki, and he barely knew either of them. “Yeah, I saw her. How did you know I was going to?”
Jules shrugged and concentrated on laying the plates on the table. “You asked about her once or twice.” She looked up at him with a sly smile. “And you left a paper with a date and time on the kitchen counter one morning, next to the open phone book.”
“And here I thought you were some kind of great detective,” he said, hoping to keep the conversation light. He’d rather there was no conversation, but it hadn’t taken him long to understand that Jules was always looking for a way to include him in everything, even conversation.
“Being observant is part of being a psychologist.” She flashed him a smile. “I can’t help myself.”
He nodded, but said nothing. He’d told his family only a little about his injuries and the eight months he’d spent in the tiny, primitive prison in Somalia, but it had been enough for Jules to put two and two together without asking questions.
“So what did you think of our doctor?” she asked.
Thankful that he could pull his thoughts from a past he wanted to forget, he considered her question and how he should answer it. Should he mention that he hadn’t expected a woman doctor? Or one so young and pretty? Jules would probably make something of that, so he decided to avoid that one. “She’s all right.”
“Trish and Kate raved about her, and even Rowdy has been impressed.”
He had to do some thinking to remember who all these people were. Rowdy, he knew from his childhood. The O’Briens’ Rocking O Ranch foreman had been like a surrogate father after Tucker’s dad was killed while bull riding. But Tucker hadn’t stuck around for long after that. Four years later, he was traveling the rodeo circuit on his own. It had been a foolish decision, but he couldn’t change the mistakes of his past.
Once again he had to force his mind from the past and focus on what he needed to remember. Trish was Trish Rule, wife of the local sheriff and the sister of Kate McPherson, who was the wife of his brother’s partner in a rodeo stock company. Jules and Tanner talked about the families often. Too often, as far as he was concerned.
Jules stood on the opposite side of the table, watching him. “But you did like the doctor?”
Unwilling to say exactly what he thought about Dr. Miles, he shrugged his shoulders. The truth was he thought the good doctor, in spite of how pretty she was, had a lot of gall asking him so many questions and acting like he was some kind of addict. He wasn’t yet ready to admit that she was doing everything she was supposed to. He wasn’t too fond of anyone in the medical profession. Experience told him they couldn’t help him, so what did it matter?
“Looks like there’s going to be a crowd,” he said, when she placed the last of the plates and glasses on the table.
“Ten of us, not counting the little ones.”
Ten? Who the hell was going to be there?
But he knew that wasn’t fair. It wasn’t his home, although he had grown up and lived there until he was fifteen. He didn’t have any right to question who she and Tanner invited to dinner. If it had been up to him, he would have skipped it, but both of them, along with others, hadn’t given him the chance. They expected him to be a part of the family.
His sister and their Cherokee grandmother were the only family he’d seen after leaving home. His grandmother had helped him make his way to the Marine Corps. After arriving at the VA in Oklahoma City a few months ago, he’d called her to let her know he was alive. She’d been the one who told him he’d fathered a child, almost nineteen years ago. The news had gotten him on his feet and on the way home. He’d seen his sister when he’d visited their grandmother, all those years ago, although they’d never spoken. Somehow she’d remembered him and had been the first to recognize him when he arrived at her wedding reception, nearly three weeks ago.
“I haven’t heard from Nikki lately,” he said. “Will she and Mac be here?”
“No, but I expect to hear from them soon.” Jules moved toward the house. “Even though they’re touring as many equine assisted psychotherapy programs and ranches as they can—” She stopped and chuckled. “Nikki is thirsty for knowledge, but I doubt she wants to be away from Kirby and the other boys very long.”
Nodding as if he understood, Tucker waited until she’d gone into the house, and then he leaned heavily on his cane. The pain meds he was taking again, thanks to the doctor, did the job they were supposed to, but they left him weak. Not just his leg, which he’d accepted would never be normal again, but all of him. For someone who was a special ops marine, weakness was almost worse than pain. He’d rather not have either, but he hadn’t been given a choice.
Not knowing where he would be sitting at the table when the time came to eat and unable to carry much of anything with one free hand, he leaned against the rough bark of a nearby tree and waited. He didn’t mind the solitude. In fact, he welcomed it. After spending months in hospital with nurses and doctors poking at him constantly, and the early barrage of questions from his family immediately after he returned to the Rocking O Ranch, being alone, if only for a few minutes, was a relief.
It wasn’t long before he heard voices, and he pushed away from the tree just as Jules returned. Her hands were full of dishes of delicious-smelling food, and she was followed by a woman with long auburn hair, who held a baby.
“Go ahead and sit down,” Jules told him, nodding toward the chair at the end of the table. “You know Kate, don’t you?”
He turned his head toward the woman and nodded in greeting, remembering she was Tanner’s partner’s wife.
&
nbsp; “It’s good to see you again, Tucker,” the woman said with a pleasant smile. “I hope you’re enjoying your family as much as they’re enjoying having you here.”
“Thanks,” he replied, hoping that would end the conversation.
Shifting the sleeping child in her arms, she turned to Jules. “I didn’t see Wyoming.”
“Tanner is bringing him down. More than likely, he’s giving his daddy trouble,” Jules answered, laughing.
At least Tucker knew that Wyoming was Jules and Tanner’s two-year-old son. The rest? Only time would solve the problem of keeping everyone straight.
“If you’ll tell me where I can put Tyler and Travis,” the redhead was saying, “I’ll have Dusty put up the playpens and baby monitor so I can help you with the food.”
“I was thinking the family room would be perfect,” Jules said, bustling around the table. “We’ll be able to see them and, with the monitor, hear every little whimper, if there should be any.”
Kate laughed, and then immediately quieted as she glanced at the baby. “Have no fear. Once Travis wakes up, we could hear him from the barn, without the monitor.”
The women laughed softly together as they left the room, and once they were gone, Tucker pulled out the chair Jules had indicated and settled onto it. He felt out of place at the table and would have preferred being anywhere else. But he wouldn’t beg off on attending this little get-together. He wouldn’t do that to Jules. She somehow always managed to make him feel welcome without questions. He appreciated that. At least his brother had found a good woman.
“Here, let me take that.”
Tucker looked up to see a dark-haired man with his hand extended, and he realized the man was offering to dispose of his cane. “Thanks. Sometimes it’s a nuisance.”
When the cane was leaning against the tree and out of the way, the man gave him a smile. “Morgan Rule,” he said, introducing himself.
“Desperation’s sheriff,” Tucker replied with a nod and tried to smile.
Morgan shrugged. “It keeps me out of trouble. Anything I can get you?” When Tucker stiffened, the sheriff settled on a nearby chair. “I may not have been in the service, but I was a police officer in Miami for a time. There are places there that sometimes resemble a war zone.”
“I’ve heard it’s rough in some spots.”
“My partner was killed in a drive-by shooting, if that gives you an idea of how bad it can get. I came here six months later.”
“There’s a little bit of hell everywhere,” Tucker said, keeping his voice low, as others began to wander into the dining room.
He’d always found it easier to talk with someone who understood, even if they hadn’t served in the armed forces. Morgan’s understanding of the kinds of hell in the world and the insanity it caused made him feel less isolated.
Family and friends began to gather in the room, and Jules directed them to their seats. When he felt someone press a hand on his shoulder, he looked up to see his Aunt Bridey and offered what he hoped was a smile.
“I’m glad you decided to join us,” she whispered, before moving on to the other side of the table at the opposite end.
He’d never planned to return to the ranch, until he’d learned he had a son. When he arrived, Jules and Tanner had insisted he stay. He hadn’t felt he had a choice when he learned Shawn would be graduating from high school in two months. There wouldn’t be a lot of time for them to get to know each other, especially with Shawn’s plans to be gone for the summer, before college in the fall. Tucker wanted to be able to say each day was getting easier with his family, but he couldn’t honestly say it was, even though some were better than others.
His heart soared with pride when Shawn came out of the house to join them, laughing and joking with Kate, but he also felt the shame that snaked its way through him at the thought of not knowing he’d fathered a child. At least he’d returned in time to get to know his son, if only he knew how to do that.
“Wonderful! I was afraid you weren’t going to make it,” he heard Jules say from behind him.
“Nothing could have kept me away,” a woman answered.
Tucker didn’t have any trouble recognizing the voice of Desperation’s new doctor. And he wasn’t especially happy that she was joining them.
Chapter Two
“You’ve met Tucker,” Jules said as she indicated the chair between Tucker and Morgan Rule. “And Morgan, too.”
“Yes,” Paige answered, smiling at Desperation’s sheriff and giving a brief nod to Tucker. It wouldn’t do any good to smile at him. He’d probably growl at her.
As soon as the thought entered her mind, she ducked her head, ashamed that she’d allowed her emotions to rule. He had more than enough to deal with, considering the pain his leg probably caused him. But he wouldn’t be getting rid of that pain if he didn’t get the therapy he needed. She feared he wouldn’t.
Needing to put aside her concern for someone who didn’t welcome it, she took her seat at the table and turned to the man on her right. “How’s Krista getting along, Morgan?”
His smile was wry as he shook his head and chuckled. “All she wants to do is stand. I think the only time she doesn’t is when she sleeps or Trish feeds her in the high chair.”
“She’s how old now?” Paige asked, quickly calculating. “Eight months? Is she cruising the furniture? Hanging on to it as she walks?” When he nodded, she smiled. “She’ll be walking on her own, in no time.”
Morgan laughed. “And then nothing will be safe.”
Trish, Morgan’s wife, was sitting on the other side of him and leaned forward. “We’re so glad you could join us, Paige. I know how busy you are.”
“It was nice of Jules to invite me,” Paige answered, always happy to spend time with Jules and her friends. If only Jules hadn’t put her next to Tucker, she wouldn’t feel so uncomfortable.
“Hey, Uncle Tanner, did you hear?” Shawn asked from the other side of the table. “Dusty’s going to help Kate with the food for senior class night.”
“Is that so?” Tanner replied, looking down the length of the table at his business partner.
“Kate is going to make her barbecue sandwiches,” Shawn continued, “like she always does, but this year Dusty’s smoking a turkey, too.”
“In a smoker,” Dusty said, “not rolled up like a cigar.”
Kate passed a plate piled high with corn-on-the-cob. “He’s getting good with that smoker.”
Beside her, Dusty took the plate from her. “When you’re married to the best cook in the county, it looks bad if you can’t make a decent sandwich. Never thought I’d enjoy cooking, but that smoker has me hunting for new recipes.”
“Where’s the party being held?” Paige asked.
Shawn looked at Jules and grinned. “Uncle Tanner said we could have it in the workshop building. Some of us are making a list of things we need to do to get it ready.”
Morgan held the platter of grilled steaks for Paige as he spoke to everyone. “I heard Hettie agreed to allow the school to use the big barn at the Commune for the prom,” he said.
“Shawn talked her into it,” Trish explained. “Or at least that’s what Hettie told Aunt Aggie.”
Hettie Lambert and Aggie Clayborne were both Paige’s patients and lifelong residents of Desperation. Hettie had given over her family home for use as the Shadydrive Retirement Home, commonly referred to as the Commune. As for Aggie, Trish and Kate’s aunt, most everyone knew that wherever Hettie went, Aggie was close behind.
“It was Hettie who talked the school board into agreeing to it,” Shawn explained. “Having it at the high school wasn’t going to work out, and we wanted someplace different.”
“What about the after-prom party?” Jules asked.
“It’ll be there, too,” Shawn answered. “And Ernie volunteered Freda to cook breakfast.”
Paige listened as the conversation at the table continued. She’d been approached to act as chaperone at the prom and knew Tanne
r and Jules had been, too, along with others she knew, including Ernie Dolan, who managed the Commune, and Freda, his cook there. Hearing about the people who’d become her patients and others in Desperation was enjoyable. The stories and chitchat always made her feel closer to the community.
Before she knew it, dinner was over, and when Jules started to clear the table, Paige jumped up to help. She followed her into the big kitchen, where Bridey stood at the sink, rinsing the serving dishes.
“All three babies are sleeping,” Kate announced with a big smile as she walked into the kitchen.
Trish, right behind her, sighed. “All of them at the same time. It’s a miracle.”
Working together, cleanup went quickly. With the warm afternoon awaiting them, Jules suggested they return to the patio and join the men. As expected, the talk of sports came to a stop when the women stepped out onto the flagstone. Once again, Paige found herself seated next to Tucker, but this time, she was determined to be sociable.
“How are those pain pills working?” she asked him, keeping her voice low.
“Fine.”
Unwilling to let him shut her out, she continued. “Have you given any more thought to my suggestion?”
“What suggestion is that?” He turned slowly to look at her. “Oh, the PT. Sure, a little. It isn’t for me.”
She wasn’t going to let him do this to himself. She was a doctor, and allowing a person to harm himself wasn’t something she could do. “I’m sorry you believe that.”
“Are you?”
“What is it that gave you this distrust of doctors?” she asked, stinging from the sarcasm in his voice.
As he stared straight ahead, a muscle in his jaw jumped.
“I wish you’d give it some thought,” she urged. When it appeared he had a curt reply at the ready, she hurried on. “Oh, I know, you did, but try it again.”
He turned his gaze on her. “Why would I do that?”
“Because I really believe it can help you.”
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