by Di Morrissey
‘G’day, Jenni.’ Tango looked at the fairhaired girl with interest. She was small and shapely and very attractive.
‘Nice to meet you, Tango. I’ve heard a lot about you.’
Snowy joined the group, sitting in a chair next to Jim. Suddenly there was a shriek and running steps echoed along the wooden verandah as Saskia belted along its length to fling herself at Tango. ‘Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?’
‘Spoil the surprise. How ya doing, kid?’
‘Good. How’s Guneda?’
‘Coming along great guns.’ He glanced over at TR. ‘I’ll tell you all about it later. So any news from Mum?’ Tango picked up his cup of tea and sat on the edge of the verandah leaning against one of the posts.
‘Not yet,’ said Millie, handing a plate of fruitcake slices to Saskia to pass around. ‘Wish she’d get back here then we’d have all the family together again.’
‘Well, nearly everyone,’ said Saskia, thinking of Colin. She turned to Tango. ‘So is Mick holding the fort at Guneda?’
‘Yeah, he’s doing great. I think he likes a spell in the office away from the track.’ Tango turned to Jenni. ‘He’s our jockey, works with all the horses and helps with the training. He rode our Melbourne Cup winner, Bill.’
‘I remember the story. Sweet William, is he there too?’
‘Yes, he won a few more races then got a bit of leg trouble so he stands at stud and is a winner there too. His old trainer Bobby always said to us to quit while we’re ahead. So we didn’t want to push it and maybe wreck him. He did good by us, hey, TR?’
TR nodded, but it was obvious he didn’t know the story. ‘Speaking of jockeys though,’ he said, ‘what are the chances of finding a job for a kid who needs a bit of a hand?’ TR turned to Jenni, ‘I was thinking of young Dennis’. She nodded as TR continued, ‘He’s in the hospital learning to get together again like me. He had a promising career as a jockey and took a bad fall, not his fault from what I’ve been told, but he won’t ride again. The kid lives and breathes horses and some sort of job around them would probably save his life.’
‘Is he mobile?’ asked Tango.
‘If he knew he had a chance of being around horses he’d crawl over broken glass,’ said Jenni earnestly. ‘He’s just got into a wheelchair but it’s been hard to get him motivated. Patients need some sort of kick-start to get them on track and willing to make the effort to get on with their lives. Some never do and stay bitter and so don’t progress as well physically as they could.’
‘But it’s up to you, Tango; you know Guneda and what it could offer him,’ said TR.
Tango looked at his father. ‘Well, I can’t see why not. It’s fine by me.’
Millie chuckled. ‘That’s the spirit, Tango.’
Jenni interjected. ‘That’s wonderful. He’ll be immobilised for a while, but in the long run he’ll walk with a bad limp, might have to use a cane, but he’ll be good as gold. I guarantee he’ll work his fingers to the bone for you if you give him this chance.’
‘That won’t be necessary. If he’s bright we’ll put him to work in the office, there’s always paperwork to be done, but he could still spend time with the horses. Come to think of it, there’s a straight path down to the stables, he can whizz his wheelchair down there whenever he likes. Okay, that’s settled. What’s next on the agenda?’
Saskia suddenly spoke up. ‘Well, I wasn’t going to say anything till I’d spoken to Mum, but I’ve dropped out of uni.’
With a clatter Millie dropped her cup in its saucer. ‘You’ve what?’
‘Your Mum isn’t going to like that,’ said Jim quietly.
‘Saskia, are you crazy?’ Tango stared at her.
Saskia looked at TR and grinned ruefully. He smiled back. ‘Well, that seems to be a bit of a bombshell. Maybe you’d better elaborate.’
Saskia took a deep breath and adjusted her position on the arm of Millie’s chair. ‘I think I might have mentioned to some of you that I haven’t been all that thrilled with the idea of becoming a vet. I know I thought it a good idea three years ago,’ she said, touching Millie’s arm as she went to protest and make that same point, ‘but it’s not till you get into something that you start to understand what’s really involved. I love animals and I don’t want an office job, but I like horses best of all and when I did some temporary assisting with a vet in the holidays he spent most of his time neutering pets and putting unwanted ones to sleep.’
‘It’d be different being a bush vet,’ broke in Tango.
‘If I was lucky enough to get work in a rural or farm practice, but even that doesn’t excite me all that much.’
‘What do you want to do then?’ asked TR.
‘I want to work with horses, but I don’t want to rush into anything. I want to have a break and think it through.’
‘You could come and work at Guneda, couldn’t she, TR?’
Saskia broke in. ‘Thanks, but I want to prove I can do it on my own.’
‘Why throw away all the years of study?’ asked Tango.
‘Look, it’s actually not as drastic as it sounds. My grades have been really good. So I went and talked to the head of the department and I have taken leave for twelve months, just deferred for a year, that’s all. So if I can’t find what I really want to do, I’ll go back, do the last year, get my degree and look into vet jobs.’
‘Well that sounds better,’ said Millie, ‘but what is your mum going to say? She has enough to worry about at present.’
‘I’ll deal with that,’ said Saskia, then glanced at Jenni. ‘Welcome to the family forum.’
‘It’s not really my business I know, Saskia, but for what it’s worth, I do understand how you feel. In fact, it’s kind of what I’m doing. You get to a point where you have to assess your real goals in life. And I’ve known doctors and nurses who’ve done what you’re doing and they either went back and finished or found another direction. You might change your mind in a couple of months.’
‘It’s a tough old world out there,’ added Jim.
‘Well, Snowy, what do you reckon?’ asked Saskia. ‘You might as well throw your twocents’ worth in!’
Snowy looked at her. ‘You listen to your heart, your spirit fella will tell you. You’ll know what’s right. Don’t worry ’bout what this lot say, Sas.’
This pronouncement was greeted with a round of applause and defused the discussion. Millie began gathering up cups as the phone rang indoors. ‘Ruthie’ll get it, she’s closest.’
Ruthie was chattering happily on the phone. ‘Millie was jist sayin’ you should be here, all the family is here . . . well, TR, Sas, Tango . . . yeah, yeah, TR. He’s here. Miss Jenni is lookin’ after him. Oh. Okay, I’ll get her.’ Ruthie dropped the phone calling through the house, ‘Millieeee . . .’
Millie came in with a tray. ‘Ssh, Ruthie, what is it?’
‘Phone. Missus is on the phone.’
‘Oh! Here take this.’ Millie thrust the tray at the startled girl and rushed to the phone. ‘Queenie? That you, luv?’
Millie listened for a moment. ‘Yes, he’s home. Jenni and me got it organised when we couldn’t git to talk to you. We’ve been dying for you to call. No, but he’s walking on crutches pretty good. Still using the wheelchair. Jenni works with him every day, so he’s comin’ on real good. But when you comin’ back home, Queenie luv?’
Millie chewed her lip as she listened. ‘Queenie you reckon you gonna find them bulls? You get here, TR needs you . . . Okay, I’ll get him.’
Jenni helped TR to his feet and he tucked his crutches under his arms and moved inside. ‘Take the phone in there, luv.’ Millie pointed to the small sitting room and left him alone.
TR picked up the phone. ‘Queenie?’
Queenie was standing in the shade of some trees by the side of her LandCruiser; she held the two-way radio handset in her hand and when she heard TR’s faint voice, her heart lurched. She lifted the handset close to her mouth. ‘TR? How are you?’
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br /> ‘I’m more mobile. I’m walking on crutches so they chucked me out of the hospital.’
‘How are you doing with Jenni?’
‘Good. Having her work with me every day has meant faster progress, I guess.’ TR changed the subject. ‘Any lead on the missing bulls?’
‘Possibly, but it could take a little while to check it out. I’m so happy you’re home. I wish I was there. Shall I come back now?’
‘No. Don’t rush back on my account. Jenni has everything under control as far as I’m concerned. And Millie is great.’
‘I see. Have you remembered anything? Have you looked over all the house?’ She wondered if he was back in their bedroom.
‘I can’t manage stairs yet, Queenie,’ he said quietly. Queenie didn’t answer. ‘You must finish this job, you can’t leave if you’re close to finding those bulls. They’re valuable and, Queenie, I’m fine, Jenni says . . .’
‘TR, I’ll be home very quickly and then I’ll be able to look after you,’ cut in Queenie.
‘I need specialised treatment, I don’t expect you to be my nursemaid.’
Queenie felt sharp tears sting her eyes. ‘TR, I want to help you, I want to look after you. I love you . . .’ It was a cry of anguish.
‘Queenie, please. It will be all right. This is hard for both of us. Don’t rush things, don’t worry and good luck.’
‘Yes, all right. Get Millie again for me. Take care, TR.’ The tears were now running down her face.
Millie was swiftly on the phone. ‘You okay, luv? What’s going on?’
‘You tell me, Millie. What do you think of Jenni?’
‘She’s nice. She . . .’ Millie hesitated, she didn’t want to upset Queenie by telling her that the bond between TR and Jenni bothered her. ‘She is getting TR walking and back on his feet and that’s the main thing, luv. You just get home safe and sound as soon as you can.’
‘This is very hard for me, Millie. I feel like TR and I are strangers. I want my husband back.’ Alone in the bush, so far away, trying to come to terms with the knowledge her husband didn’t remember her, that he was back in their house, being helped and supported by some other woman, was terribly painful and she could barely speak.
‘Is Saskia there?’
Millie heard the tearful voice and not wanting Saskia to upset her further by maybe blurting out her own news, Millie said swiftly and firmly, ‘She’s down at the stables with Tango. We’re all here looking after TR. But tell me your news, luv. Where are you?’
‘In the scrub, headed for some bloke’s property. I’ve met up with a few people who’ve been helpful.’ The line crackled and faded but Millie could hear the tired sadness in Queenie’s voice.
‘Sounds like you might be gettin’ somewhere then. You jist do what you gotta do, luv.’
‘All right, Millie. I’ll call again.’ Queenie replaced the hand-piece and leaned against the vehicle, sobbing loudly.
Millie stood staring at the phone as Tango and Saskia rushed into the room. Millie turned to them. ‘She had to go. She sends her love, said she think’s she’s onto them bulls.’
‘Why did she have to go?’ ‘I didn’t quite understand, Sas. And the line was bad,’ she added quickly. ‘You told her about TR? She spoke to him?’ asked Tango.
‘Yep.’
‘Is she coming back?’ Saskia looked worried; she could tell Millie was holding something back.
‘Not just yet. TR told her to keep going as she had some good lead on them duffers.’
‘What is it, Millie, you look upset,’ said Tango putting his arm around the plump, grey-haired housekeeper who had been responsible for bringing him back into the fold of his family.
‘Your mum is upset too . . . it’s just that she misses TR and was hoping for better news. You know, when she heard he was here she thought mebbe he got his head back.’
Tango and Saskia exchanged a half smile above Millie’s head. ‘I suppose she was disappointed. And what did she say about the missing bulls?’
‘Jist she had some ideas from some people. She’s goin’ to some old place. Come on, let’s go back to the others.’
Tango stood on the verandah watching TR push himself across the lawn in his wheelchair. He caught up with him. ‘You going anywhere in particular?’
‘No, bit of a shortage of paths. I was just getting some fresh air, thought I’d sit in the shade. What are you doing?’
‘Looking for you. Want to take a spin down to the stables?’ Without waiting for an answer, Tango grasped the wheelchair and sped off at a fast run with TR tilted back in the seat hanging on as Tango zigzagged across the grounds, calling an imaginary race, before screeching to a halt by the top stables.
‘You’re bloody mad,’ said TR placidly.
‘I can be a kid here. Got to be on my best behaviour at Guneda, seeing I’m the temporary boss.’ He was out of breath and leaned against a stable door. TR looked at the tall sandy-haired boy with the brilliant sapphire eyes that matched his own. ‘How’s it going down there?’
‘Good. When are you coming down to see us?’
‘I don’t know, Tango. I’m having a hard enough time adjusting to life here without going to my other life where everyone knows me and I haven’t a damned clue who anyone is or what’s going on. I’ll get around to it eventually.’
‘You’ll have to be re-educated, like the Cultural Revolution,’ grinned Tango, unlatching the bottom half of the stable door then holding out his hands to TR.
‘Don’t joke, Jenni has already told me that’s next.’
TR took Tango’s hands and let him pull himself out of the chair.
‘You rely on her a lot, don’t you?’ Supporting TR, Tango took slow steps into the stable.
‘Yeah, she’s been incredible. Tougher than a bloke sometimes, but also very understanding.’
‘I hope Mum doesn’t think she’s usurping her position,’ said Tango bluntly.
‘Quite different things,’ said TR and quickly changed the subject. ‘Hey, who have we here?’ He stared at the dark stallion who’d been standing quietly at the back of the stall. TR was supporting himself by holding onto the door frame as Tango untied the halter. The horse swiftly lifted his head, its ears twitching, and TR said admiringly, ‘That’s a fine looking horse’. As soon as he spoke the horse moved straight to him, pushing his head into his chest. Hanging on to the door with one hand, TR rubbed the horse’s head. The horse smelled him and nibbled at his shirt. TR grinned. ‘Friendly fella.’
Tango held the horse steady as TR was in danger of losing his balance. ‘This is Starlight Sky, known as Star.’
TR suddenly felt a surge of affection for the beautiful stallion and reached out and touched him again, then looked at Tango. ‘He’s my horse, isn’t he?’
Tango nodded, unable to speak for a minute as he watched TR fondle the horse and the horse respond to the master who’d been absent so long. ‘Do you remember him? Remember anything?’
TR shook his head. ‘No. I don’t remember anything, but it was like my body responded. I had a feeling of closeness with him. He certainly knows me though.’
‘Won’t be too long and you’ll be out riding him again.’
‘I don’t know.’ TR suddenly looked scared. ‘We’ll have to see what Jenni has to say about that.’ He turned away and limped out of the door, holding onto the wall.
Tango slipped the halter from Star and latched the door, then helped TR back into his wheelchair. Star hung his head out the top open half of the stall door and whinnied in annoyance.
‘Sorry, mate. I’ll take you for a ride later,’ said Tango as he turned the wheelchair back towards the house. TR was silent and Tango realised his father, the superb horseman who was once a famous rodeo star, was frightened of getting back on a horse.
Chapter Eighteen
Queenie drove slowly, her vision blurred by tears. Honey was back in the horse float but she kept her nose lifted to the high gap at the front of the float so she could
smell the fragrances of the passing bush. Queenie had ridden back from Walshie’s place to get the Toyota and float, leaving Maud and the kids to their lessons. Good to her word, Maud had told Queenie where she thought her missing bulls might be.
‘Just an idea, mind you. But sometimes I get a special feeling for tings, and I’m generally right. I know ’bout Mitchell and his place, and not all of it good — he has a pretty shonky name. But I reckon if you got pricey cattle, Mitchell’d know. Worth a look at his place I reckon, but be careful.’ Queenie planned to drop Maud and the kids along the track and head over to Mitchell’s property to check it out.
Once she’d arrived back at the LandCruiser Queenie had raised Tingulla on the two-way radio, but now she wished she hadn’t. The call had upset her. Perhaps she was being unreasonable — she had, after all, set it all up — but she wished she was there and caring for TR and not out here in the wilderness on a wild and risky hunt.
Hearing TR’s voice had caused anguish in her heart and soul. Their physical and on his part, mental, separation was hard to bear. The more she thought of him, the more her feelings of love intensified and threatened to overwhelm her. TR was part of her; their love and closeness sustained her, made each moment of each day one of joy. How often he had held her in his arms and whispered, ‘We are part of each other, we are the two halves that make the whole, my darling. How lucky we are.’ Knowing how they loved each other had given both of them the strength to face any challenge, to tackle any mountain. But now the very foundation of Queenie’s life had been shaken. She was feeling vulnerable and was threatened by the idea that some other woman was caring for TR. Jenni might be a professional but no living person could give TR the depth of care and love that she could.
In the distance Queenie saw the first of the sheds and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. She had to get herself together. Auntie Maud and the kids were waiting for her.
She spotted Zero first, his shock of frizzed hair standing out against his dark features. He stood and watched her impassively as she drove up.