‘Why?’
‘Spears against guns? There aren’t many of them, either. Can’t help feeling sorry for them. It was their place, now we’re pushing them out.’
‘And my uncle?’
‘Some people are making a lot of money over there. Whaling, building, forestry: a lot of money. Your uncle’s one of them.’
‘Does my uncle have a family?’
‘My understanding is he’s a bachelor. Got a grand house, though, on the high ground overlooking the river. Why do you ask?’
‘Just interested,’ Emma said. ‘What are your plans when you are well again?’
‘To rejoin my regiment.’
‘In Van Diemen’s Land?’
‘If it’s still there.’
They drank the last of the wine.
‘Tell me, Miss Tregellas,’ Captain Dark said. ‘What are your plans?’
‘Last night your aunt said she had arranged a marriage for me with Mr Naismith.’
‘It’s none of my aunt’s business.’
‘Except that Mr Naismith agrees with her.’
‘I didn’t ask his opinion either,’ Captain Dark said. ‘I’m interested in what you think about it.’
Emma’s eyes met his. ‘I am under age, Captain Dark. Mr Naismith is my guardian. I am not permitted to have thoughts.’
‘I doubt that stops you having them, though.’
‘Perhaps not. But I have learnt one thing in life, Captain.’
‘Which is?’
‘To keep my thoughts to myself.’
‘Even if it means marrying Mr Naismith?’
A teasing smile. ‘Would that be such a terrible fate?’
‘For you, I think so.’
‘That is a most improper thing to say, Captain Dark.’
‘I do not believe a woman of your spirit would ever be content as the wife of a man who would crawl through mud if my aunt told him to.’
‘Then what would you have me do?’
‘I would have you be true to yourself. If you believe Mr Naismith is the man for you then I apologise for my remarks. But I do not think a woman of your courage and strength could believe that.’
Emma stretched her eyes very wide at the captain’s words. ‘Courage and strength? Come now, Captain Dark.’
‘I do not withdraw a syllable. It took both strength and courage to stand up to my aunt.’
‘She didn’t thank me for it.’
‘She is a woman who has had her own way all her life and has forgotten what it is to have anyone, especially another woman, stand up to her. She is a bully, Miss Tregellas, and will make your life unbearable if you put down roots in this district. And I am sure you are under no delusions that Mr Naismith will raise a finger to help you. Your life will be a war, constant and unending.’
‘Perhaps I would win the war? If I have the courage and strength you attribute to me?’
‘It would be impossible for you to win. My aunt holds all the cards. And do not imagine she would not use them.’ He took her hands in his. ‘I cannot believe you could contemplate such an existence.’
Emma looked at him. Her inclination was to trust this man but for the moment she remained cautious. She freed her hands. She said, ‘A shortage of funds can limit one’s choices.’
‘How well I know it,’ he said.
‘But you are a man. For a woman, Captain Dark, the choices are few. If I do not marry what options are available to me?’
‘You can live.’
It was aggravating that he was so slow to understand. A man could be a soldier or even turn highwayman, if he were sufficiently desperate. There were a hundred things a man could do. For a woman there was nothing.
‘To live, you say? Pray explain how I am supposed to do that,’ she said. ‘Give myself to a protector? Someone like you, perhaps?’ She saw that she had shocked him by mentioning the unmentionable and that stoked her anger. ‘Should I perhaps become a harlot and sell myself on the streets?’
‘Have you considered becoming a teacher?’
Emma’s shoulders slumped. She saw he really was concerned for her and was ashamed of the way she had spoken. ‘I have no training, no experience with children and I suspect no aptitude. But I thank you for the suggestion.’
‘Vicar’s wife or not, my aunt will eat you up if you stay here. She will not tolerate a rival.’
Despite herself Emma had to smile. ‘In what way could I possibly be a rival to Lady Raedwald?’
‘You are young. You are beautiful, if you will pardon my saying so. She would not tolerate youth or beauty in another woman. She would regard you as a deadly rival, I assure you. She does so already.’
‘Why then does she wish me to marry Arthur Naismith?’
‘Because then you will be in her power. Also she believes it unseemly that the vicar should remain a bachelor.’
‘But why me?’
‘Perhaps you are the only candidate for Mr Naismith’s hand?’
‘And if I decide to leave how can she prevent me?’
‘Believe me when I say she would do whatever was necessary to stop you.’
‘She could hardly kidnap me.’
‘I would not put that past her for a moment.’
She saw he was serious. ‘That would be monstrous!’
‘In defence of what she considers her own interests my aunt is a monster. I am surprised you did not know that. If you plan to leave here, Miss Tregellas, I would counsel you to get as far away as you can as quickly as possible, for she will surely send men after you to bring you back.’
‘I find that incredible.’
‘Might is right, Miss Tregellas. It is a doctrine my aunt has pursued all her life. She would not hesitate.’
That night Emma sat in her room and considered her situation. It was clear that Lady Raedwald was determined she should marry Arthur Naismith. If she did so she would have a respectable if modest position in life. There would be few financial worries. She would have a measure of respect within the community. She would no doubt have children whom she would be expected to bring up in accordance with her husband’s wishes. She would live a worthy non-life until the day of her death.
She would be a nothing at her husband’s side, a creature of duty and obedience with no voice of her own. She would be patronised by the lesser gentry and humiliated by Lady Raedwald, who would be satisfied with nothing less than the utter negation of her personality and will. Forever.
What about her feelings for Captain Dark? She knew it was futile to feel anything for a man who in local opinion was so far beyond her reach but the feelings existed and were not to be denied.
Marriage to Arthur would be to reject the life force that ran in her veins, but how could she avoid the fate that had been planned for her?
When she went to bed she was as low as she had ever been, but in the night she woke upon a thought so outlandish she knew she must put it out of her mind at once. She did not; when she rose to face the day it was still there, as potent as ever.
Captain Dark had told her she was a woman of courage but was she courageous enough to risk the humiliation of failure? Was she up to handling the unknown challenges she would face?
She had no answers. She knew nothing about the real world. She told herself to settle for her lot in life and be thankful, as the Bible enjoined. She would stay where she was and accept the limitations of a life that would be its own reward.
She bent her head over the dusty papers and got on with her work.
After an hour she took a break. The sun shining through the window cast rectangles of golden light across the floor. She went to the window and looked out. Beyond the slope of the roof she could see the wooded park where fallow deer were grazing and the drive running between ancient elms to the high wall that marked the property’s perimeter. The Yarmouth road lay on the far side of the ornate drive gates with the gatekeeper’s cottage beside them and beyond the road the waters of Betty’s Mere shone golden in the sun.
&nbs
p; She stood by the window, staring and thinking. Freedom… She had told herself the matter was settled, that she’d made up her mind to accept her situation, but now she listened to the staccato beating of her heart and knew that nothing had been settled at all.
The days passed, with Emma still having no idea what she could do to secure a future better than the bleak one her cousin and his patron had mapped out for her. To begin with she did not venture beyond the park gates. After a couple of weeks she decided she would explore further but when she tried a pugnacious man emerged from the gatekeeper’s lodge and told her his instructions were that she was not to be let out alone.
‘Why is that?’
‘Wouldn’t want you gettin’ lost, now, would we?’
She went back to the house and complained, not to her ladyship – who was unavailable – but to the housekeeper.
‘Am I to believe I am a prisoner?’
Mrs Hadgwick had not forgotten their earlier conversation. Now her smile would have put the sourest lemon to shame.
‘You must believe what you wish,’ she said.
‘What I wish,’ Emma said, ‘is to be able to go for a walk outside the park. If you will not authorise it I shall ask her ladyship’s nephew to speak to her about it.’
‘Captain Dark is away in London,’ said Mrs Hadgwick.
‘But will return,’ Emma said. ‘I wonder what he will have to say when he discovers his aunt’s housekeeper has taken it upon herself to imprison a guest of this house?’
Mrs Hadgwick’s mean eyes flashed red but two days later she told Emma Lady Raedwald had approved her request to walk outside the park in the company of a sub-keeper.
‘Her ladyship is too considerate of your safety to allow you to roam the countryside unescorted.’
‘A walk is hardly roaming the countryside,’ Emma said. But saw that was the limit of the concession she would be granted.
Every day when the weather permitted she walked, with one or other of the two sub-keepers strolling behind her. One of the men was friendly, the other not. Occasionally she talked to the friendly one, asking him about the birds whose bubbling cries echoed across the marshland.
‘They’s curlews, them,’ he said.
‘And the others?’
‘All sorts. Some stays all year round. T’others they’s what you might call birds of passage, them.’
Like me, Emma thought. She liked the wild birds of the empty places, the curlews’ lonely cries, the honking of the geese. In time she might have come to think of this as home but as things were that was impossible. Her spirit was oppressed by the dowager’s unseen presence and by the image of Arthur Naismith waiting in his narrow house. Then the freedom of the marshlands seemed more like a prison.
The second keeper was a skinny creature with red hair, a cast in one eye and a permanent scowl. Only once did they converse – if you could call it conversation.
A track led off the road, flanking Betty’s Mere and heading towards the sea.
‘What’s down there?’
‘Mud.’
‘It must go somewhere.’
‘Nay.’
‘I have a fancy to explore it,’ Emma said.
But he stood between her and the path. He might not be big but was determined and did not give way. ‘Best keep to path,’ he said. ‘Spoil tha fancy clothes down there. ’Ell to pay, I let thee do that. Like I say, there’s nowt down there but mud.’
Perhaps he was right. She did not make an issue of it but noted the track’s existence and locked it away in her mind. Another day, perhaps…
She did not like the thought of asking anyone for help, even Captain Dark – do that and she’d be a hostage to betrayal – but she had no choice. Even with help it would be hard; alone it would be impossible. Once or twice she considered giving up the idea; then she visualised what it would mean to be married to Arthur Naismith and knew she must at least try to escape. If she failed she could console herself with the thought she had done her best; give up without trying and she would deserve every moment of the dismal future that would then face her.
She took a deep breath and went looking for Captain Dark.
‘He’s gone riding,’ a maid called Polly told her. She didn’t quite say What’s it to you? but it was close; the servants knew everything and were well aware of Emma’s lowly status at Raedwald Hall.
‘When will he be back?’
‘Didn’t say.’
A toss of the head – Don’ you go puttin’ on no airs wi’ me! – and Polly took off, duster in hand.
Emma walked on to the terrace. The air was warm; beyond the road the sun shone on the rippling waters of Betty’s Mere; a clamour of rooks circled above one of the elms; water from the fountain in the ornamental lake blew like silver mist in the breeze. She felt a pang at the thought of turning her back on all this and the security it offered, but she knew that at best it would be the security of the grave; at worst a loveless marriage with a man in thrall to an autocratic woman of whom nothing good could be said.
A rider on a chestnut horse turned in at the park gates. Her heart jumped as he came trotting down the drive. Careful not to run, Emma walked down the flight of steps from the terrace and crossed the grass to meet him.
Captain Dark reined in and raised his hat, smiling down at her. ‘If I had known you were about I would have suggested you come with me.’
Knees weakened by that smile, Emma looked back at him. ‘I have just come from the library. How do you manage to ride with that foot?’
‘With difficulty.’
‘Then why do it?’
‘Because I won’t have many more opportunities. I leave for London on Monday. Sir Edmund Wilkes is examining my wretched foot the following day.’
‘And then?’
‘Cut it off, perhaps.’
She disliked flippant talk about such an important matter; it might bring bad luck.
‘I trust not,’ she said.
He laughed. ‘So do I. I’d like to get back to my regiment as soon as possible and I doubt a one-legged officer would have much future in a foot regiment. So Monday it is. My aunt’s carriage will take me to Yarmouth where I’ll board the London Flyer. All being well I should be in London about eight in the evening.’
She had not expected to have to act on her decision so soon. She took a deep breath but still could not utter the words.
He looked at her strangely. ‘Miss Tregellas, are you quite well?’
Finally she managed to speak. ‘I need your help.’
She had done it. With those four words she was committed. Once again her heart was pounding with nervous tension. She was spinning the wheel of fortune, placing her future in this man’s hands.
He had remained on horseback; now he dismounted. ‘I’ll walk with you.’
‘What about your foot?’
‘I’ll manage.’
They walked along the drive towards the stables that lay at the back of the big house.
‘You say you need my help,’ Ephraim Dark said. ‘I shall certainly help you if I can. But how?’
‘I have decided to follow your advice. I am going away.’
‘Going where?’
‘Far away.’
He touched her arm. ‘I would give you money if I could but my aunt is the rich one. How will you manage without?’
They reached the stables, the horse’s hooves clattering on the cobbles, and he handed the reins to a groom. They walked towards the house.
‘It is not money I want but advice,’ Emma said. ‘I am a prisoner here. I want you to advise me how I can get away.’
‘You have definitely made up your mind to go?’
‘Definitely,’ Emma said.
‘Then you mustn’t delay or it may be too late. Last night I overheard my aunt talking to Mr Naismith in the drawing room.’
They were standing in the lobby that led from the back door into the main part of the kitchen.
‘My aunt finds it unacceptable
that you should keep the vicar waiting so long before marrying him.’
‘I told them why. It is out of respect for my father.’
‘They don’t believe you. They intend to apply for a special licence.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘A special marriage licence means they don’t have to wait for the banns to be read. It means you can get married straight away.’
‘Not if I don’t agree.’
‘Theoretically that’s true. But my aunt is a determined woman.’
‘You think I would not be able to resist her for long?’
‘I think she will make life very unpleasant for you if you try.’
‘Does Mr Naismith have no say in this?’
‘Quite apart from your other… attractions? Apparently there’s been some problem over the Reverend Arkbit’s appointment so the archdeacon’s position may still be open. But the bishop is insisting it can only go to a married man.’
‘Then Arthur would certainly agree,’ Emma said. ‘What do you suggest I do?’
‘I am saying you must clear out while you can. Where are you planning to go?’
She drew a deep breath and spoke the words that had been fermenting in her mind since she’d read the letter Barnsley Tregellas had written to her father. ‘To my uncle in Van Diemen’s Land.’
He looked at her strangely. ‘And you trust me with this?’
She heard her voice stripping her naked. ‘With this and everything.’
On Saturday night Emma and Ephraim Dark were upstairs in the library.
‘I said I would help you and I shall,’ Ephraim said. ‘But I hope you will forgive me if I try to protect my own interests at the same time.’
‘Meaning?’
‘Meaning I don’t want to fall out with my aunt if I can avoid it. I doubt that will be possible if she suspects me of helping you escape. I am leaving the day after tomorrow. If you wait a few days before you go there may be a chance Aunt can be persuaded I had nothing to do with your departure. Not very heroic, I am afraid.’
‘It is only sensible,’ Emma said. ‘But how shall I manage if you’re not here?’
‘I have already arranged it. Go to Raedwald hamlet. I’ve spoken to a fisherman who lives there. Josiah Yarm will take you to Yarmouth in his fishing smack. You can take the London Flyer from the Bugle Inn.’
Land of Golden Wattle Page 4