by Gun Brooke
“Only if you think so. An agent takes care of your interests and makes sure people like me pay you the best money possible. They do take a certain percentage for their services, though.”
“Then I don’t need an agent. I have Dominic and you. That’s enough.” Hayden’s certainty made me smile tenderly.
“Want to have some coffee on the roof or in the TV room?” I asked as I rose to clear the table.
“The TV room. I like watching television with you. If you have time.”
“I do.”
“I’ll go check out the listings.” Hayden hurried toward the TV room.
I took care of the dishes while the coffee brewer produced strong Gevalia. Pouring milk in our mugs to mellow the taste a bit, I carried the mugs to Hayden, who had already curled up on the couch. After I placed them on the coffee table, I sat down next to her. “What are we watching?”
“NCIS. Do you like it?”
“Yes.” I took my mug and sipped my coffee. Hayden followed my example but also lifted my free arm and wrapped it around her shoulders. Resting her head against me, she sighed contentedly and drank from her mug. I smiled into mine as the show started. Hayden felt warm and soft against me, and I let my hand play with her hair. She tipped her head back and smiled up at me. I kissed her lightly. “Who knew you were a snuggle-bunny?”
“I didn’t. Nobody does. You’re the first person I’ve ever snuggled with.”
“I’m very lucky.” I meant it.
“Me too.”
We watched NCIS and then an old episode of CSI, but then I noticed Hayden becoming suspiciously heavy against me. “Are you falling asleep, Hayden?” I murmured against her hair.
“Mmm.”
“Why don’t we go to bed? We have to get up early tomorrow. India will fetch us at eight.”
“Mmm.”
“Hayden?” I laced my fingers through her hair and gently scratched her scalp. “Wake up. It’s time to go to bed.”
“That doesn’t make sense,” she murmured but sat up, looking at me through her eyelashes. “Tired.”
“I can see that. Come on.” She did look dazed. I helped her up, and she stumbled toward her room and closed the door. I waited a few moments, knowing she’d open it again, and she did. “Good night, Greer. Sleep well.”
“You too, Hayden.” I walked over to her and kissed her forehead. To my surprise, Hayden flung both arms around my neck and kissed my lips with a sudden onset of passion. I found myself pressed against the door frame, her hands cupping my cheeks gently as she explored my mouth.
“You make me shiver,” Hayden whispered huskily against my lips. “You make my body react in so many different ways. When we kiss I…I ache inside. It’s like pain, but not in a bad way. It makes me want to continue this until the ache goes away, but I also don’t want it to end.”
“That sums it up for me too,” I said, holding her close. “You make me ache too, in the best of ways. It’s at times like this when all I want is to take you to bed and make love to you all night.”
“Why don’t you? It’s what I want too.”
I could hardly breathe. Her words, so honest and easy to believe, made her twice as hard to resist. “Because it’s too soon.” I tried to explain, but it was hard when my entire system screamed for me to take her word for it. “So many new things are happening to you right now, Hayden. Once we’ve been to Chicago and you feel more settled in, we’ll revisit this.”
Tilting her head, Hayden frowned. “And if Chicago isn’t the success you expect? Am I still of interest to you then?” Her eyes grew bigger. “Is the Chicago showing an audition for more than my art?”
Shocked at how her analytical mind reached these conclusions, I realized I had only myself to blame. By assuming she understood some things that she didn’t, and by not being direct enough about my expectations and intentions when it came to our deeply personal relationship, I had left enough space for her to guess. Her questions were as logical as they were heartbreaking.
I held her close and looked into her eyes. “Listen, darling. I know you’ll succeed with your art, but that has nothing to do with the fact I want you here with me. I won’t insult your intelligence and claim your amazing talent doesn’t factor in when it comes to how I feel about you—after all, it was your paintings that sparked my interest to begin with. Your art is part of you. But you keep my interest, you as a person. When we kiss, I forget about everything else, and that won’t change, no matter how your career turns out. You’re not going to Chicago for me to find out if you’re good enough to be my potential lover, my…partner. It’s the truth. I promise.”
Hayden was still cupping my cheeks, and now she ran her thumbs across them, beneath my eyes. Only then did I notice I was crying.
“I didn’t mean to make you cry, Greer,” Hayden said, looking stricken. “I had to know what to expect as I want to be your lover. Partner. If I fail at that, I don’t know what that would do to me. Someone I knew once said I wasn’t girlfriend material. I didn’t understand at first what that meant, but when I looked it up, I knew he was right. Considering what young couples do while dating—traveling, attending parties, movies, and the theater, and shopping…I wouldn’t cope very well with that. As you’re much older than that boy, I hoped you already knew this about me and would still accept me.”
I hid my smile against her forehead at her bluntness about my age. “I do. I know all that, and we can work around it. And besides, I hate shopping—especially for clothes.”
“Yes. Good.”
“And now, it’s time to get some sleep.” I kissed her lightly. “Don’t worry about anything. India’s taken care of everything, and I think we’ll have a good time in Chicago. We’ll take lots of pictures and show Isabella.”
“Yes.” Brightening, Hayden turned to walk back to her room. As I began to close the door, she stopped me. “No. Leave it open. Please.”
“All right.” I decided to do the same. No more closed doors or walls between us. The symbolic act might be lost on Hayden—but then again, it might not.
As I got ready for bed, I thought of how Hayden, complex and challenging, had intrigued me from day one. What I hadn’t counted on those first days was how quickly and completely she’d captured my heart. The idea of not having her in my life was too painful to even go near. I wasn’t superstitious, but I feared if I gave voice to the fear of losing her, I would irreparably jinx everything.
Chapter Eighteen
Logan Airport was as busy as always. People waited in line to check in and go through security, and I found it interesting how many people always over-packed or needed to debate the luggage fees.
India had taken care of everything. Erica dropped us off at United’s entrance, and Hayden and I stayed by the car while India went to locate the woman in charge of assistance. We were already checked in—another thing India had fixed online—and only had carry-on luggage.
Hayden was pale but composed. Gripping the brushes in her jacket pockets, she studied the busy travelers with both anguish and interest.
A cab pulled up next to us and a woman in a business suit jumped out, furiously tugging a carry-on roller bag from the backseat. She pressed a computer bag down on top of the extendable handle and hurried toward the entrance. As soon as I saw her shove her way through a group of teenagers, I knew our first challenge was here, as a young girl lost her balance and staggered backward, toward Hayden.
I stepped forward and caught the girl with both hands. “Whoops,” I said merrily. “Busy lady.”
“Yeah, did you see that?” the girl said, glowering. “And they say kids today are rude. Ha!”
“Indeed.” I helped her back to her friends and returned to Hayden. “See, it’s going to be crowded in here, but I’m by your side, and soon we’ll meet the woman who’ll guide us on a special route. We still might bump into people, though. Remember what we talked about this morning?” I wasn’t being condescending. Hayden looked like she needed to remind hers
elf of our game plan. Flanked by India and Erica, she wasn’t focusing but had started to breathe faster.
“If I get upset, I’ll grab hold of you. You’ll take care of it.” Her voice was staccato and monotone.
“And when we go through security?”
“I’ll be on my own going through the metal detector and the body-scan. You’ll go through first.”
“And I’ll watch you the whole time, all right? You’ll be fine.”
“Okay.” She took a deep breath and gave me her polite smile, but it was better than nothing.
“Hayden Rowe?” a woman asked, approaching us with India. “I’m Maryanne Thompson. I’m going to assist you and help you aboard the plane.”
“Thank you.” I introduced myself and then motioned at Hayden. “This is Hayden. If you can find a route with the least amount of people, that’d be great.” I wasn’t going to tell this woman anything about Hayden she didn’t need to know. She might think Hayden was agoraphobic, and that was fine with me as long as she did her job well.
India and Erica kissed my cheek, and then India did the same with Hayden. I would’ve thought that was unadvisable, as she was so jittery, but it seemed to help her refocus. “Have fun now, Hayden. That’s the most important part. Don’t think about anything else but the fun part of it all.”
“Okay.” Hayden smiled a real smile toward my friends, who were becoming her friends as well. “Thank you for driving us.” She shot me a triumphant glance at remembering the niceties, and I winked at her.
After making sure we had our boarding passes, Maryanne led the way through a part of the airport where hardly anyone stood in line. A wheelchair symbol suggested this section was also for anyone needing special assistance. As we wound our way through the roped-off area, Hayden right behind me, I kept scanning what was ahead. Only two people in wheelchairs were before us in line at the security check, which was a blessing.
As we’d planned, I went through first. I was putting my watch back on when it was Hayden’s turn.
“You have to put your jacket in a bin, ma’am,” a man said, and approached her with an empty one.
Hayden looked at me, panic beginning to stir in her darkening eyes. I knew immediately what she was worried about. Her brushes. She was clutching them.
“Hayden. Just take your jacket off. It’ll go through in a minute, and you’ll have it back and your items too.” I spoke slowly, making sure she was looking at me. “It’ll be okay. Just do it as quickly as you can.”
Hayden tore off her jacket, bunching it up and shoving it into the bin. Then she hurried through the metal detector and stopped in the body-scan machine. Glancing down, she placed her feet exactly in the outlined foot symbols on the floor.
“Arms out from your body, please.” A young woman handling the machine spoke gently. “That’s it. Thank you. You’re done.”
I was ready waiting with her jacket, and I don’t think I’ve seen anyone put a piece of clothing on so fast before. Hands pushed deep into her pockets, her face relaxed as she found her brushes. After that, Maryanne guided us to an electric cart and we climbed onto it. At this point, I realized I was tense as well and forced myself to relax. Hayden sat pressed tightly against me, holding on to her carry-on bag with one hand and her brushes with the other.
“You’re doing really well, darling,” I murmured. “We’ll be at the gate soon. It’s time to board the plane when we get there, I believe.”
The gate staff pre-boarded us as soon as we stepped off the cart, and I made sure Hayden got the window seat. Slowly, she began to relax, and I was so proud of her I could sing it from the rooftops. The woman who feared crowds and unknown territory had braved a damn airport, and now all I could do was pray that maneuvering through O’Hare would go just as well.
The two-and-a-half-hour flight was initially uneventful. Hayden was sketching in her ever-present sketch pad, and when the flight attendant served us beverages and offered us magazines, she declined the magazines, but of course asked for mineral water, glaring at the poor woman. We didn’t talk much, only a few words every now and then, but it was a comfortable silence. I couldn’t have imagined the flight going any better until we started to descend.
Turbulence hit us out of nowhere, and the flight attendants had to take their seats. This was something I hadn’t counted on, which of course was ridiculous as turbulence was a common occurrence. Casting a glance at Hayden, I saw she was calm and unaffected. I, on the other hand, wasn’t. I didn’t have a problem with flying, but I hated turbulence and what it did with the plane, with a passion. As the plane shook and made everything loose around us rattle, I gripped my armrests tightly, digging my fingers into the leather.
“Greer?” Hayden took my hand, actually prying it off the armrest. “What’s going on?”
“Just turbulence.” I spoke through clenched teeth. “It’s all right. We’ll be fine.”
“I know. Why are you so pale?”
“I’m not too thrilled with it. To be honest, it frightens me.”
“The planes are built to handle it.”
“It’s not an entirely rational fear, I know.” I took some deep breaths. “I’ll be fine.”
“Yes. You will. So will I.” Hayden studied me for a moment, then leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Nothing bad will happen. I’m here.” She smiled slowly, as if testing to see if what she’d said was okay.
“Thank goodness for that,” I said and squeezed her hand, returning her smile.
The plane leveled out as we descended below the clouds. I kept hold of Hayden’s hand until we were on the ground. It felt far too good to let go.
As it turned out, when we landed at O’Hare, two people were waiting for us and whisked us through the airport. We had to go on one of the trains, but clearly Maryanne had called ahead, and the two men made sure we had an entire section to ourselves. When we reached the domestic-arrival area, I spotted a sign saying Landon-Rowe immediately. Seeing our surnames together like that made me smile as my heart did its now familiar twirl where Hayden was concerned.
“This is our ride.” I placed my hand at the small of Hayden’s back and walked over to the tall woman holding the sign. “I’m Greer Landon,” I said. “This is Hayden Rowe.”
“My name’s Tyra. Welcome to the Windy City, Ms. Landon, Ms. Rowe. Let me take your bags.”
“No.” Taking a step back, Hayden held on to her roller bag. She looked at me and then back at Tyra. “Thank you.”
“No problem, ma’am. This way.” Tyra looked as congenial and polite as before and led us out to where the limousine was waiting. Long, sleek, and black, it provided us with an air-conditioned and calm environment. “Just to double-check, it’s the Whitehall Hotel, right?”
“Yes, thank you.” I relaxed into the backrest and closed my eyes briefly. I’d come close to buying a condo in Chicago many times, as I came here often, but I liked the Whitehall, and it was conveniently located on the same street as the gallery.
I kicked off my shoes. First part of this trip done. Tonight was the big opening of the remodeled Chicago Landon Gallery. It had been six months since it closed temporarily. I checked my watch. Twelve thirty. I’d have to head over to the gallery around five p.m. to make sure everything was all right. The exhibition started at seven and would continue until midnight. I’d received good news about the status of all the artwork, including Hayden’s, whose shipping I’d overseen myself.
Now I regarded Hayden more closely. She wasn’t pale and didn’t seem stressed. “How about we order a light lunch from room service and then have a nap?”
“Yes. I’m thirsty.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? Here’s a whole fridge with different drinks.” I opened the lid to a long, narrow refrigerator. “Don’t tell me. Mineral water?”
“Yes.” Hayden greedily reached for the small bottle and unscrewed the cap. Drinking in big gulps, she emptied it in a few moments. It reminded me that she hadn’t had much to drink on the flight, as th
e flight attendant had somehow managed to intimidate her. That or simply annoy her, I wasn’t sure.
“Better?” I said, and smiled. Her lips glistened from the moisture lingering there, and she looked stunning.
“Yes.” She hesitated and then scooted forward and knocked on the partition. She waited for it to lower and then wiggled the empty bottle. “Thank you.”
Blinking, Tyra then grinned. “You’re very welcome, Ms. Rowe.”
“My name’s Hayden.”
“Then you’re welcome, Hayden.” Tyra kept her eyes on the road but nodded in a friendly manner at Hayden via the rearview mirror.
The Whitehall desk clerk recognized me on sight, which made the check-in procedure quick and painless. They had my information and credit card on file. Hayden stood glued to my side as our bellhop fetched our keycards. He wheeled the cart into the elevator, and I made sure Hayden was on the other side of it. After riding up to the eleventh floor, we stepped into the large hotel room holding two queen-size beds. I’d offered Hayden her own room, but I couldn’t persuade her even if the room had been an adjoining one.
“I don’t know this hotel. I’ve never stayed there. Please, we can share. I’ll be very quiet. I won’t disturb you.” It had bothered me greatly how young and girlish her voice had become as she’d practically begged me to share a room. Of course, I’d reassured her we could get a room with two beds instead. It was only for the weekend, after all. Two nights.
Now, Hayden was unpacking already as I tipped the bellhop. She shook her clothes out and refolded the ones going into the dresser, only to repeat the same thing with the clothes to be put on hangers. Her clothes traveled well, so nothing looked like it needed ironing.
I followed her example, and once I hung my clothes next to her, it dawned on me how right that looked. Her clothes to the right, mine to the left. As I turned to see what she was up to, I saw she was already fiddling with the remote, looking excited at the prospect of exploring the channels.
“What do you want to eat, Hayden?” I asked as I sat down at the desk, opening the information binder.