by Gia Riley
She was one of the few girls our age who made glasses hot. Hers almost fell off her nose as she tried to get her arm free from the twisted mess.
“Do you want help with that?” I asked her.
She turned her head so fast, the glasses I admired tumbled off the tip of her nose and slid across the floor.
“Shit,” she said again, with more determination than the first time she spoke. Her swearing only made me like her more.
I bent to pick them up and smiled when I glimpsed at her sneakers. She wore the same Chucks as me, only in red.
“Nice shoes,” I told her as she took her glasses from my hand. Our fingers brushed and that was enough to make my heart beat double-time. That’s when I noticed she wasn’t wearing a bracelet like most of the girls in our grade.
“Thank you, Dylan.”
My name slipped from her lips. It was unexpected and caught me off guard. “Didn’t realize you knew my name,” I blurted out like the excited idiot I tried not to be.
“I’m the manager,” she said with confidence. “It’s my job to know the entire roster.”
“Makes sense.” I tried to keep the disappointment out of my voice, but it was impossible. As much as I didn’t want her to be like all the other girls, I wouldn’t have minded her trying to flirt. I could have used a sign that she might have been as interested as I was.
“I’m glad something makes sense,” she said as she yanked her hand through another section of the netting. “I’m still wondering why I thought managing was a good idea. Sports aren’t my thing.”
“You don’t like volleyball?”
“Not really,” she admitted, not even trying to pretend she enjoyed the sport I played. “I’m here because it’ll look good on college applications. And in case you’re wondering, it’s as selfish as it sounds.”
I sat down on the pile of mats next to her, thankful she didn’t tell me to get lost. “It’s okay to be selfish from time to time, especially when you have a goal in mind.”
“It is?”
“Sure. You have good intentions, and from the looks of it, the only person you’re really hurting is yourself. Is your arm okay?”
“I’m fine, just got myself a little tangled up.”
She was so pretty, I risked embarrassing myself. “Can I tell you a secret, Zoe?”
“How’d you know my name?” she asks softly.
“Because you stand out in a crowd. When I first saw you, I had to find out who you were.”
“Oh,” she whispered. “You must have me mixed up with my sister. I’m a twin.”
“No, that’s not it,” I told her.
“Oh,” she said again. I liked that she was at a loss for words. When she looked at me the next time, she had a shy grin on her face. “Are you going to tell me your secret or what, Dylan?”
I nodded and my words got lost as her voice mesmerized me. When I stopped tripping over my tongue, I told her, “Between you and me, I only play volleyball because it’ll look good on college applications.”
“Really?” I loved that I surprised her.
“Well, that and I’m tall for my age. I sucked at basketball, so here I am.”
She eyed me from head to toe, and seemed to agree with my height, but said nothing. I had never met a girl of so few words.
It was now or never; I knew there wouldn’t be another chance like that one. Even if I crashed and burned, I had to go for it. “Did you take your bracelet off?”
Zoe glanced at her bare wrist. “No, I don’t have one.”
“But you’re helping clear out the gym for the dance tomorrow night, right?”
Avoiding my eyes, she nodded. She was embarrassed about the bracelet. “Yeah, Coach Kelly said everything had to go.”
She set me up perfectly, but I’d never asked a girl out before, not one like Zoe. “I was wondering if you’d like to go to the dance with me.”
“Me?” she questioned as her cheeks turned a cute shade of pink. God, she was adorable.
“Why not you?”
“Um, I don’t know. I’ve never been to a dance before.”
“Go with me. Let me be your first.”
Playing with the netting in her hands, she blushed. And even though she was hesitant to give me her eyes, she smiled. “You really want to take me?”
“I do.”
The invitation wouldn’t have been official without the bracelet, so I reached into my jeans and pulled out the string of candy that had been burning a hole in my pocket all day long. I had waited for a moment like that one.
Before I opened the plastic wrapper, I checked for any signs she would stop me. When I saw nothing other than happiness, I continued. “Zoe, will you be my date to the Sweetheart Dance?”
Her eyes dropped to the candy, and though she looked like she wanted it more than anything, she still hesitated. I hadn’t read her wrong. I saw it in her eyes. She wanted the bracelet.
“I wasn’t planning on going to the dance. My parents encourage me to focus on school. Boys really aren’t an option in our house, even though my sister sneaks around without them knowing.”
I had a couple classes with her twin sister. But she wasn’t the one who caught my eye, Zoe was. “Do you wanna go to the dance?” I asked her, hoping she said yes.
“I do, but I don’t even have a dress.”
“Tell your parents you’re going with a friend.” Even if I had to demote myself from potential boyfriend, it was worth it.
“Are we friends?” she asked with a hopeful gleam in her eyes. From what I’ve noticed, she didn’t have many. “We just met.”
“We’re friends, Zoe.” I stood up so I could put the bracelet on her wrist. Because once I asked her, I wouldn’t allow her to come up with any other excuses, especially since she wanted to go with me.
She let me put the candy around her wrist. Once it was in place, she brought the bracelet closer to her face, eyeing it like I gave her diamonds instead of a bunch of chalky sugar pieces on a string—the school’s tradition.
“Wear whatever you want to the dance, sweatpants even. I just want to dance with you, Zoe Allen.”
She bit her lip and nodded. “I need to ask my parents, but since we’re friends, maybe they’ll let me go.”
She definitely friend-zoned me, but I didn’t care. I didn’t intend to stay there for long. I’d make her my girlfriend someday, even if I had to wait until she turned eighteen and didn’t have to worry about her parents’ approval.
“Thank you, Dylan. You surprised me.”
“I’ll surprise you for as long as you’ll let me.”
“What does that mean?” she questioned with a confused expression.
“It means whatever you want it to mean. Right now, it means I’m taking my new best friend to the dance.”
I tapped the tip of her adorable nose with my finger before I turned and walked away. We had just officially met, but I’d watched her from a distance since August. Six months was forever in teenage years.
I knew I’d never get enough of that girl.
After the great netting rescue, our friendship never wavered, and neither have my feelings for Zoe.
The dance was a typical high school event with lots of glitter and awkward slow dancing. It was the best Valentine’s Day I’d ever had. I had Zoe to myself for three whole hours.
Almost seven years later, I’m still biding my time, hoping we’ll somehow happen on our own when the time’s right. But now that we’re already a couple months into our senior year of college, time is running out. Before Zoe fades away, I need to make her fall.
She’s gotten more complicated as the years have passed, and it’s not her parents keeping us apart anymore. She’s old enough to date, only she doesn’t want to. Much like when her mom was alive, she’s very regimented and sticks to her schedules. When I met her, she had blinders on, her sole focus being on her grades. The blinders are still in place, only her attention is shifting toward grad school.
Her bea
utiful brown eyes are on the finish line, and while I hope to be crossing it with her, I want to do it as her boyfriend. I crave more of Zoe. I always have, and I always will.
As far as I know, she still thinks Keely’s going to seduce me today. That’s why I’m done waiting for the universe to align and do the work for me. I need to show Zoe how much she means to me, and how much I want her in my life.
Starting now, on the walk to her last class of the day, I’m planning on telling Zoe that I broke up with her sister.
She’ll still be in full nerd mode after class, but I don’t care. Like any other Friday afternoon, while most of her classmates are ready to party, Zoe will be one of the last to leave the building. When she does, she’ll be itching to tell me all about the lecture she sat through, reciting it almost word for word.
Most girls thrive on gossip and guys, but Zoe gets her kicks in class. The more facts tumbling around in her brain, the better she feels.
I love that about her. That she doesn’t have her head in a Solo cup every night of the week, drowning herself in cheap beer and mixed drinks. Parties are fun, but Zoe has priorities and goals. And I want to be by her side as we achieve them together.
As expected, she’s beaming when she spots me, hurrying over with mittens on her hands and the fuzzy hood on her winter coat framing her face. Her deep brown eyes sucker punch me in the gut, and all I want to do is pick her up, throw her over my shoulder, and haul her back to my bed.
Before she rambles about the laws of physics, even though it’s killing her to keep it inside, she still takes the time to ask, “How was your day?”
“I broke up with Keely.” It’s not at all how I planned on having this conversation, but seeing her in front of me, I can’t let her believe I’m in a relationship for another second.
Zoe pauses, as shocked as I expected her to be. “Why’d you do that? She must be pissed after buying all that stuff.”
“I don’t care about the stuff. And pissed isn’t the word I’d use. Not that it matters.”
“Oh, it matters,” she says like she’s envisioning Keely going ballistic.
I shrug it off. “I only care what you think of me.”
Zoe’s said more times than I can count how happy she was for the two of us. Considering Zoe doesn’t lie about anything, it pissed me off. I didn’t want her making observations or having opinions about me and another girl—ever.
“Dylan, what does it matter what I think? If you didn’t like my sister, you shouldn’t have been with her. So, I guess you did the right thing. I just hope you didn’t break up with her because of what I said this morning.”
I want to tell her it had everything to do with Keely’s plans, but that’s not the whole truth. It had everything to do with Zoe.
“Keely’s not the girl for me. It was wrong to date her in the first place,” I tell Zoe as I slide her bag off her shoulder, hoisting it onto mine.
She tries to take it back but her mittens stop her from making any progress. “That’s heavy, Dylan. You don’t have to carry my books.”
“Yes, I do. It’s a long walk back to your dorm.”
She glances at the parking lot, searching for my car. It’s there, but I’m not about to use it. Not when I can spend thirty minutes walking her across campus, talking and laughing.
“Why are we walking then? You’re the one with the car.”
“Maybe I like walking with you.”
Smiling, she shakes her head and pulls the strings of her hood a little tighter. “So, about the breakup. How can you know Keely was wrong for you if you were only together for fourteen and a half days?”
Zoe thrives on details, making sure each one’s categorized in her mental filing cabinet where she’ll never forget it. The girl has a freakishly strong memory, and I love that she’s been keeping track of the length of my relationship. It means there’s a chance it bothered her more than she realized. “Let’s just say you two are nothing alike.”
“But you already knew that.” She tugs on my arm, pulling me off the walking path. As we stand in the crunchy grass, she gives me a look that’s hopeful yet so full of uncertainty. “Why did you end it, Dylan?”
Because I’m in love with you. “It’s simple, Zoe. It takes Keely four hours to figure out what she wants to eat for dinner. If I plan on taking her to a restaurant, I have to ask her what she wants by noon, or we won’t eat until ten o’clock at night. I can’t live like that.”
I hate that I took the easy way out instead of telling Zoe how much I care about her. If I wasn’t so lame, I’d have laid it all on the line and prayed she’d jump into my waiting arms. But I’m not as confident as she thinks I am. Despite being done with the games, I’m still so scared I’ll lose her if I try to open up and tell her how I feel.
“Dylan,” she says. “You’re a foodie, so I see why this would be a problem, but you worry about the strangest things. When you like someone, it doesn’t matter if you skip meals or eat at midnight. You’re together.”
“Then I guess it wasn’t meant to be, Zoe. Because it bothered me.”
Her eyes dance with amusement, like she can’t wait to say, I told ya so.” She doesn’t. And she never would. “What else bothers you about my darling sister?”
“She sheds like a damn cat. Her hair is pretty and all, but yours doesn’t do that. She showered at my place twice, and I had to call the plumber to snake the drain. He said it was the worst he’s seen in a long time.”
Zoe tries to muffle her laughter with her wool mittens, but they can’t hide my favorite sound. “Anything else?” she asks with a smile on her face—my second favorite thing. She’s enjoying this.
“Her taste in movies sucks. She’s seen none of the classics. Sometimes I wonder how you’re even sisters, let alone twins.”
“I ask myself that question all the time. But as annoying as she can be, she has good qualities, too. Sometimes they’re just overshadowed by the annoying ones.”
Now would be the perfect time to tell Zoe what I love about her. How nothing she does could ever annoy me and that even if she clogged the drain, I’d still think she was perfect. But I say none of those things. I just stare at her.
Zoe’s a million miles away, so she doesn’t notice I’m staring. I’m not sure where she goes when she zones out, but when she snaps out of it, she always loses some of her energy.
“What’s wrong?”
Staring into space, she says, “I thought that’s what guys liked about Keely. She does what she wants when she wants. She’s the epitome of a free spirit. And way more appealing than all my schedules and spreadsheets.”
“Zoe, your sister is so spontaneous I bet she farts in her sleep.” Zoe giggles again, and this time it takes every ounce of willpower to keep my hands to myself.
I need to get moving before I grab her hand or tell her how much I want her.
Nodding toward the dorms, I tell her, “Come on. Let’s keep walking before you freeze to death out here.”
She reaches for my arm and links us together. For a brief second I feel like we’re a real couple. But Zoe’s not thinking about our bodies touching or what it would be like to kiss me. She’s still focused on her sister.
“In Keely’s defense, nocturnal flatulence is a fairly common problem. You could even run into it with the next girl you date, so it might not be fair to count that one against her.”
Like a schmuck, I get turned on by her doctor talk. “If it were you, Zo, I wouldn’t care.”
Did I just encourage her to fart in front of me?
“Good to know, but I’ve stayed over enough for you to know that’s one trait we don’t share.”
“And I’m thankful.” Real smooth, Dylan. Now every time she passes out on my couch, she’ll be thinking about gas. How’s that for romance?
I need to do better if I want to get her attention.
I have to do something big—something she won’t be able to doubt or walk away from.
Something permanent
.
Zoe
By the time I get back to the dorm, I have five missed calls from Keely. I need to make sure she’s okay, but what do you say to your sister when your best friend is the one who broke up with her?
I can’t hate Dylan.
I can’t even dislike him.
He did this for a reason. Whether it’s because she sheds too much or she takes too long to make decisions, it was his choice, and there’s nothing I can do about it.
Keely won’t have a problem finding another guy to date. She could have several knocking down her door already whereas Dylan’s the complete opposite. I’m sure lots of girls would jump at the chance to date him, but he’s so selective it’s hard to figure out what he wants.
For as long as I’ve known him, he’s only had a couple relationships, none of which lasted more than a few weeks. Just like today, he can ramble off a list of infractions he can’t seem to overlook. I don’t know why he agrees to go out with them in the first place.
Whatever it is he’s looking for, I hope he finds it. He’s too good of a guy to end up alone. I’d be okay if it took him some time to figure it out. Because once he commits, he won’t have time for me anymore.
I dial Keely’s number and as expected; she answers on the first ring. “Are you okay?”
With a voice as light and airy as cotton candy, she surprises me. “Of course, I have a date tonight.”
“That didn’t take long.” It’s not unlike her, but I’m disappointed. The breakup should affect her. “You’re not even a tiny bit sad about losing Dylan?”
“I didn’t lose him, Zoe. He lost me. Not that it’s my fault he’s gay. I may be excellent in bed, but there’s only so much I can do.”
I spit a mouthful of water all over my comforter and pillow. “Dylan isn’t gay, Keely. Not even a little.”
“He didn’t come right out and say he’s gay, but that’s the impression I got. Plus, there’s no other explanation. I mean, after you told him what I had planned for tonight, a heterosexual male would have been knocking down my door. Why didn’t Dylan?”