by Susanna Carr
3
HE SHOULDN’T BE DOING THIS, Sean thought as he deepened the kiss. He lacked control when he was with Isabel. He would go wild and show no self-discipline.
But this time would be different, Sean decided as his heart pounded in his chest. This time he wouldn’t be caught by surprise.
Sean grabbed Isabel’s jaw with both hands, tilted her face up and plunged his tongue into her mouth. Isabel’s murmur vibrated inside him. He loved hearing her moans and mewls, her grunts and groans. He wanted to learn the nuances of every one of them.
Sean bunched her dress in his hands as she returned his kiss with wild abandon. Isabel slid her hands along his back, her nails dragging against his shirt as her pelvis cradled his erection.
He trembled as the desire rushed through him. How did she do it? How did Isabel get him this hard, this fast? He needed to slow down. He wanted to savor every moment, every touch.
Sean gasped against Isabel’s mouth when he felt her pulling his shirt free from his jeans. Her eagerness matched his, Sean noticed as his abdomen muscles contracted under her touch. She showed no hesitation, no caution, in the face of his raging desire. She wasn’t going to hold him back...although she should.
She hastily unbuttoned his shirt and tore it open. As she slid her fingers through his chest hair, he grumbled with pleasure. Isabel smiled under his mouth before she tried to shove his shirt off his shoulders.
Sean grabbed her wrists and flattened her hands against the wall. He leaned in, his body trapping hers. He couldn’t stop noticing how enticing her curves were. How much he wanted to sink into her softness and drive into her welcoming heat.
He pulled his mouth away from hers and she opened her eyes. Her face was flushed and her parted lips were red and swollen. Her eyes glittered. Lust softened her features—lust and something else. Something close to adoration, something that pulled and twisted at his heart.
“Turn around,” he said, his voice raspy and low. He couldn’t stop staring at her face. He couldn’t stop believing that this was something more for her than sex. Sean knew better, but one look in her eyes made him believe what they shared could last forever. That, more than anything, was making him lose control.
She blinked a few times. “What?” she asked in a daze.
“Face the wall, Isabel,” he said softly, his words slurred as the sexual hunger pounded through him.
Isabel slowly turned around and Sean immediately felt the loss of the intimate connection. He wanted to watch every emotion chase across her face as he claimed her. Wanted to see her expression when she claimed him. And that scared him.
She raised her arms and flattened her palms against the wall. He quickly unzipped her dress, momentarily relieved that she couldn’t see the tremor in his hands. The sound of metal dragging against metal was loud to his ears. Her dress sagged open, revealing a strip of her white lace bra.
That teasing glimpse made him break out into a sweat. He had to see more of Isabel. All of her. Right now. Sean slid his hands inside her dress and hissed when he touched her soft, warm skin. As Isabel dipped her head forward, her hair falling to the side, Sean kissed the back of her neck and tasted her delicate and scented skin.
His hands felt big and clumsy against Isabel’s curves. When he skimmed his fingers along the lace edge of her panties, Isabel shivered. She was trying her best to hold back as he freely explored her body.
Isabel suddenly lowered her arms and reached for the front of her dress. She pushed it off her, allowing it to fall into a red gingham pool at her feet. She leaned back, resting her head against his shoulder as he covered her breasts with his hands.
“More,” she pleaded with a low groan and arched her spine.
He liked that she wasn’t hesitant or shy about her requests. She wasn’t going to ask for permission or follow his lead. In public she usually hid her true thoughts and desires with a polite smile and the right words. Now she was revealing what she really wanted.
Sean turned her around and covered her mouth with his. His kiss was hot and unrefined. No matter how much he wanted to slow this down, he knew now it was going to be as fast and crazy as the last time.
Isabel boldly palmed his erection. He felt big under her delicate fingers. Sean shuddered as he tried to hold on to his control. But before he knew it, she had unzipped his jeans and shoved his clothes down his legs.
She knelt down before him and grasped his penis with both hands. He desperately wanted her to continue but it was dangerous. He would be enslaved to her touch.
His gasp rang out as she wrapped her lips around his penis. Sean shoved his hands into her soft hair, cupping the back of her head as she licked him. He watched, breathless, as Isabel drew him in deeper. She teased him with her tongue and mouth, instinctively understanding what he wanted before he could form the words. He bucked hard when she moaned with pleasure.
He wasn’t going to last. He felt the kick in his blood as his heart raced. He reluctantly pulled away and pushed off the rest of his clothes. “Where’s your bedroom?” he asked. He barely gave her a chance to point at the door before he gathered her into his arms.
Sean rushed to the bedroom and they fell onto the bed. Isabel’s fingers fumbled as she tried to strip off her bra and panties, as if they were scalding hot. He placed his hands on hers, stilling her movements. “Let me,” he said.
Isabel pulled her hands away and stretched out her arms over her head. He peeled off her bra and panties before he knelt on the floor between her dangling legs. Sean placed his mouth on her sex.
Her response was as uninhibited as he had expected as he licked the wet folds. He tasted her with an insatiable hunger as she grabbed his hair with her fist.
Isabel chanted his name between pants and told him exactly how he made her feel. He dipped his finger inside her and her flesh gripped him tightly. She wrapped her legs over his shoulders as he pleasured her. Her hips rocked and twisted as the tension inside her built and built. As her demands grew more fervent.
Isabel climaxed hard. He felt the ripples of her satisfaction against his tongue. She cried out his name as her body undulated on the bed. Sean continued to stroke her, wrenching every drop of pleasure from her until she went lax, her muscles twitching in the aftermath.
He stood up, his body shaking with need, and stared at her. Isabel was naked and flushed, spread out on the bed, waiting for him. He had to have her more than he had to take his next breath.
But first he needed to protect her. “Condom?”
She motioned at the bedside table. He pulled open the drawer and grabbed a foil packet. He felt Isabel’s gaze on him as he put it on. He looked at her and paused when he saw the gleam of anticipation in her eyes.
Sean craved that anticipation. He also craved the trust and the love that softened her features. But it wasn’t real. He had to remember that this was all because she had read that erotic diary. He was an experiment for her and nothing else.
Instead of crawling onto the bed and settling on top of Isabel, Sean reached for her legs. He cupped the back of her thighs and lifted her hips off the mattress. Isabel’s eyes widened with surprise. He watched her chest rise and fall with each choppy breath and he knew she felt vulnerable. She was at his mercy.
He entered her with one long thrust. Sean groaned as her wet heat enveloped him. He tossed his head back, clenching his teeth, as he struggled for control. He almost lost it when Isabel wrapped her legs around his waist, drawing him in deeper.
“Wait...” he said in a growl.
She gave him a look of disbelief and rocked her hips experimentally. Sean bit down an oath. His knees almost buckled when her flesh gripped his penis.
“Isabel...” he warned.
But Isabel didn’t want to wait. She moaned deep in her throat as she glided her hands along her chest. She rocked her hip
s restlessly as she squeezed her breasts.
Sean’s fingers dug into the back of her thighs as he watched her slide her hands down her stomach. He loved watching Isabel put on a show. He wanted her to demonstrate what she was feeling. Tell him what she needed and wanted. She could ask for anything and he would give it to her.
“Keep going,” he said roughly.
She stopped her descent and returned one hand to her breast. He met her heated gaze as she rubbed and pinched her tight nipple. Sean swallowed and licked his lips as he imagined taking the peak of her breast into his mouth and teasing her nipple with his teeth.
“More,” he said.
Isabel arched her spine and moaned as she played with her breast. His heart pounded in his chest, his body begging for release, as her hips twitched with need.
“Show me what you want,” he said.
She closed her eyes and splayed one hand against her sex and her core clenched. Sean wanted to bury himself deep inside Isabel.
“Don’t be shy with me,” he urged as he gave a shallow thrust. Shy wasn’t the same as surrender. He never wanted Isabel to be uncertain around him.
Isabel caressed her swollen clitoris. The shiver that ran through her triggered something inside him. His shaky control snapped and he plunged into her. Isabel’s eyes flew open, her mouth split into a wide smile as she grabbed on to the bed. He thrust into her again and again as her legs tightened around him.
Sean barely heard her splintered commands and incoherent encouraging words. Isabel gasped and went rigid as her orgasm tore through her. He felt as if his heart was going to leap out of his chest as he watched her wrestle with the intense pleasure.
His pace grew faster and unpredictable as the need clawed through him. The only time he’d ever been this wild was when he’d first made love to Isabel. That troubling thought dissolved as quickly as it had formed. Sean gave a hoarse shout before he found his release and succumbed to the blinding hot sensations that stormed through him.
* * *
SHE’D DONE IT AGAIN...
Isabel lay on her back, sprawled across the bed. Her chin stung from being scratched by Sean’s stubble. Her skin was slick with sweat and her hair was plastered against her head.
She stared at the ceiling wondering how she could feel exhausted and yet vibrantly alive. She tried to ignore the fact that the aftermath of their wild lovemaking was quiet. Subdued. The only thing she heard was her heart pounding in her ears and her unsteady breath when she gulped in air.
Once again, she had shown a part of her true self to a man who had too much power over her. Why did she do that with Sean? When had she started trusting him?
She couldn’t keep her hands off him. She had told him what she wanted and demanded to have it happen right that minute. She had no idea what had come over her. She had never been that vocal or that demanding in bed.
How could Sean want something comfortable instead of this?
She turned her head and saw Sean next to her. He was lying on his stomach, his masculine body at odds with the white floral sheets. His blond hair was tousled and his eyes were closed. Isabel noticed that he wasn’t breathing hard and she wondered if he had fallen asleep. How could he be sleeping when she was so jittery from the joy rushing through her veins?
Her gaze traveled from his wide shoulders and strong back to his tight ass and powerful thighs. She was tempted to reach out and caress Sean. Wake him up, turn him over and explore his body with her mouth.
Sean’s eyes suddenly opened and he captured her gaze. It was as if he could read her mind. Isabel wanted to look away. She knew her eyes expressed the hunger and the happiness she felt. She wanted to share it with Sean, but at the same time, she couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
Was he going to bolt out of bed and act as though it had never happened? Say it was a mistake never to be repeated? She was tempted to drag the bedsheet over her body as a way to protect herself.
Or was it going to be worse? What if he considered this comfortable sex? Her stomach twisted at the thought. She knew she wasn’t as experienced as he was but she’d had plenty of satisfactory and adequate sex in her lifetime. This was not it!
“Give all the power to me, huh?” he teased in a rough voice.
She felt her face turn bright red. “I tried but I couldn’t help myself. I didn’t hear you complaining.” In fact, he had encouraged her. The excitement shining from his eyes made her grow more daring. “I’m sure with more practice...”
There was an awkward beat of silence and Sean looked away. Oops. Isabel pressed her lips together as she refrained from adding to her words. She had gone too far and made too many assumptions.
She had felt safe enough with him to express her fantasies and she’d hoped he felt the same way. But his fantasy was the opposite of hers. He wanted her to hide her sensual nature from the rest of the world, assuming it would save her some trouble.
Sean shifted to face her. He didn’t seem in a hurry to leave her bed as he glanced around her small bedroom. “I should have guessed that your place would look like this.”
“Oh?” She glanced around, wondering how he saw it. Sometimes she wondered if the soft yellow walls, white bedding and simple wood furniture were too sedate. If this meant she was too sedate. And yet, she didn’t want to change a thing in her room.
“It’s feminine and refined. Just like you.” Sean reached out to brush her damp hair from her face as if he couldn’t help himself. As if he needed to hold on to some physical connection, no matter how small. “It’s not at all like the room you have in your father’s house.”
“I didn’t pick anything in that room,” she said. “My mother decorated it.”
“Really?” he said as his hand trailed down her jaw.
Isabel chuckled lightly as she understood his surprise. “She designed the room she never had. She always wanted a canopy bed and she loved the color pink. I was always envious of my friends’ rooms, even if they had to share it with their sisters. Those rooms reflected their personalities.”
He brushed his thumb against her reddened lips. “You could have changed it.”
“No, after she left, the room was something to remember her by. I didn’t want to erase that.” The room was girlish and innocent, completely at odds with her mother’s reputation. In some ways, it helped Isabel remember that Charlene Bennett was more than the rumors and scandals she had left behind.
“You’re very forgiving,” he said as he drew lazy circles against her lips with his thumb. “Most kids would have been angry and hurt if their mother suddenly left. They wouldn’t keep anything to remember her by.”
Isabel realized he was talking from personal experience. “It took me a long time to forgive,” she admitted. “But it wasn’t a surprise when she decided to leave that day. Even at twelve, I could tell she felt stuck.”
And lately, she’d felt a kinship with her mother. That scared her. It was the one thing she had fought against for years, the biggest fear that her father had. While she wouldn’t make the same choices as her mother, Isabel also didn’t want to cause anyone pain because of her transformation.
Isabel tried to shake off the feeling and dismiss the ideas in her head. She didn’t want to think about that. “What did your room look like when you were growing up?” she asked him determinedly. “I imagine something dark with posters all over the wall.”
His hand skimmed down to her throat. “No, I didn’t have a room of my own. Or a bed,” he added with a frown.
“Why?” she asked.
“My mother always shipped me off to a relative when she decided she couldn’t take care of me,” he explained as he watched his hand drift down her chest. “They never had room for me so I usually slept on the couch or the floor.”
She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t think he wanted h
er to say anything. Sean didn’t look at her as he stroked her breast.
“My relatives would take care of me for a little while but I was always acting out,” he said with a sigh. “Always getting into trouble around town. When one relative decided she’d had enough, she’d send me back to my mother. And she would dump me onto another relative. Eventually she ran out of people who would take me.”
He dropped his hand and splayed his fingers against her stomach. His touch felt possessive. Protective. “You’re very fortunate that you have a family and a town that wants what they think is best for you.”
“I know,” she whispered. She was grateful for what she had and at times felt guilty for rocking the boat. Life was good, so why didn’t she do what was expected of her? But the life she had didn’t quite fit the woman she was becoming. She couldn’t go back to the woman she used to be, even if she tried.
“I’m not the woman that Seedling wants me to be,” she confessed. “I can’t fit into the role they’ve assigned me.”
“Sure you can,” Sean insisted as he caressed her stomach. “You’re just going through a late rebellion stage.”
Isabel swallowed back her disappointment. That wasn’t what she wanted to hear from Sean. “What are you talking about?”
“Most people have this stage during their teen years. Did you get into any trouble with the law when you were a kid?”
“Of course not!” Isabel said. “I’ve never had so much as a parking ticket.”
“What about when you went to college?”
“I lived at home and worked part-time at the library.” She had been fine with that choice. She didn’t believe she’d missed out on anything. “I didn’t do a lot on campus.”
“Name the craziest thing you’ve done.”
Fall in love with you. Her heart lurched and she bit her lip. She’d been guarding that information for a while but she knew better than to reveal it now. “Well,” she said hoarsely, “it’s kind of difficult to find trouble in Seedling when the gossip travels faster than the car taking you home.”