by L. S. Scott
“Liz,” I said, “Hi, Janna asked me to bring this to you. She got tied up in the kitchen.”
“Oh, thank you dear. You didn’t have to do that.”
“It’s no problem,” I smiled.
“And you are,” she quizzed.
“Natalie,” I answered. I could feel Chad’s eyes locked on me.
“It’s nice to meet you Natalie, this is my son Chad,” she said proudly, squeezing his arm.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I said politely. Before I could excuse myself, she continued.
“Chad plays baseball at the University of Arkansas,” she doted.
“Mom,” Chad said, rolling his eyes.
It was Liz’s intention to give us something to talk about, us being close in age and her unaware I was there with Jaron. And I, clueless as usual, didn’t put two and two together. All I could think about was the fact that he was in college, at the U of A and I found myself interested in spite of Jaron, waiting for me.
“A Razorback? That must be awesome,” I said, smiling.
“Yeah. It’s a great school. Where do you go,” he asked, assuming I was his age and assuming I was in his social class, where everyone attends college.
“I’m still in high school. I’m a junior,” I said, slightly embarrassed.
His brows shot up. “Wow, you look more like a junior in college,” he said, unable to keep his eyes from darting to my body for a split second. Damn, sweater, I thought to myself.
“I get that a lot,” I laughed nervously.
Liz had excused herself from our company and was mingling, which I suspected was her end game all along. I completely got side tracked talking to Chad about ACT scores and majors and asking general questions about the campus. He was very friendly and easy to talk to. It wasn’t until I felt a heavy arm across my shoulder that I realized I had lost track of time. Chad’s face went blank as he looked from me to Jaron then extended his hand.
“Jaron, nice to see you,” he said politely.
Reluctantly, Jaron reciprocated. “Can I steal her for a minute,” he said, forcing a smile.
“I need to go say hello to Uncle Greg,” Chad said bowing out, “It was nice to meet you Natalie,” he smiled before retreating.
His arm still tight around my shoulder he ushered me into the house, down a hallway off the living room and into a darkened bedroom, lit only be a small scented plug in.
He shut the door behind us before turning to me, “What the hell Natalie,” he said hatefully.
I blinked, “What?” I asked, raising my hands to the side.
“All over college boy that’s what,” he growled.
“I was not all over him, Jaron. I was just being friendly, having a conversation.”
“I’ve never seen you so, bubbly,” he said sarcastically.
“I’ve always been bubbly. This is just the first time you’ve actually took me anywhere that there’s people,” I snapped, bobbing my head.
He stepped up, to get in my face, his nostrils flaring. I pushed him back, “Get out of my face Jaron. You’re being a jerk.”
He grabbed my wrists and pulled my arms up behind my back. He glared down at me, his eyes darting back and forth, searching mine.
“What?” I said smartly.
He stared at me for a bit longer, “If you don’t want me to fuck that attitude out of you right here, you better drop it,” he warned.
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want to have to go back to the dinner party fucked and flustered after an angry bang session, but I couldn’t control the clenching deep in the pit of my stomach. And it was hard to tell if he was really angry or flirting, in his own screwed up way. But, me talking and laughing with another guy, I’m sure had him agitated.
“I’m sorry,” I said, submissively. He loosened his grip on my arms. “But I don’t know how I’m supposed to act. Should I not speak to anyone? Should I walk around behind you with my head down? What do you want me to do?”
He smirked a side-ways grin that held no humor, “Just stop being a flirt.”
“I wasn’t flirting. I was just being friendly until I could exit the conversation,” I said, not being entirely honest.
I had been very interested in the information he had about the university. Until I met Jaron, the University of Arkansas had been at the top of my wish list, but it was hours away, and I knew it was completely out of the question now.
“Yeah whatever. Just stay with me. Okay?” he said his mouth hovering over mine.
“Okay,” I whispered before he kissed me.
When the caterer delivered the prepared food, I helped Janna transfer it to fancy serving dishes and set it all out on the table. Everyone picked a seat and dined family style. It was like having dinner with the biggest family ever. Jaron sat between me and Janna and they chit chatted quietly through-out dinner. Margie had sat next to me and kept my ear hot the whole time. I smiled and nodded and tried to hold up my end of the conversation. Jaron would nudge me with his knee from time to time and smile over at me. Once I looked up and caught Chad smiling at me from several chairs down. I smiled and looked away quickly.
After dinner and dessert and drinks, people finally started shaking hands and leaving, except for family, which included Greg’s sister and nephew. Jaron and I sat on the loveseat, his arm draped over my shoulder, watching as the stranger’s took their leave.
“Thank god,” Jaron mumbled, as the room cleared out.
“Jaron,” Greg called from the entry and lifted his chin, summoning Jaron to join him in the office.
He turned to me, “I’ll be right back,” he whispered, kissing my temple. “Be good,” his tone held the hint of warning.
I got up and went to the kitchen. I busied myself, rinsing dishes and putting them neatly in the dishwasher.
“Oh, sweetie, thank you,” Janna said, setting down a stack of dirty plates.
“No problem, Jaron has deserted me,” I joked.
Janna disappeared, gathering more dirty dishes and utensils. When I packed the dishwasher full, I bent down looking under the sink, searching for the soap, unaware that Chad was leaned on the kitchen counter, propped on his elbows, watching me.
It was a big beautiful kitchen, but just like every other kitchen, the cleaning products under the sink were unorganized and hard to see. I pilfered through for a couple minutes before stumbling onto the cascade. I stood and took a few steps to the dishwasher, filled the dispenser, closed it and turned it on. When I turned around, I first saw Chad staring at me, then swallowed hard when I saw Jaron staring at Chad. Chad smiled, unaware he was being watched, until Jaron moved in behind him and spoke.
“Enjoying the view,” he hissed, as he sauntered by, rounding the corner to stand in Chad’s eye line.
“Um, I,” Chad stuttered.
Janna’s timing was impeccable when she came breezing back in the kitchen with another arm load, oblivious to the tension between the two. Jaron turned his attention to her unburdening her load and smiling. Chad took advantage of the distraction and disappeared around the corner.
Liz and Chad finally left, leaving Jaron and I as the last of the dinner guests. The four of us lounged on the comfy sofas, talking and laughing. Jaron was relaxed for the first time all night, drinking a glass of expensive whiskey with Greg.
“Thank you guys for coming and be so understanding,” Greg said, lifting his glass to us. “I know that’s not the Thanksgiving dinner you’re used to Jaron.”
“You’re welcome, thanks for the invite,” he said nodding slowly and sipping his liquor.
“And thank you for all your help Natalie,” Janna said, reaching over and patting my knee. “I would still be cleaning if it weren’t for you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“So, your nephew, Chad,” Jaron said to Greg. My heart stopped, where was he going with this and why couldn’t he just drop it? “He in college now?”
“Yeah,” Greg answered, “U of A. He plays baseball.”
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“Hmm,” Jaron said, nodding.
The clock on the mantle chimed, signaling it was eleven o’clock. Jaron looked its way, downed the last of his whiskey and stood, pulling me to my feet.
“We better head,” he said, reaching for Janna as she stood and giving her a big bear hug.
“I love you baby brother,” she said, squeezing him tight. It was really sweet, the connection they had and it made me miss Jake terribly.
“I love you too,” he reciprocated. He let her go and extended his hand to Greg, the two leaned in, bro hug style. I hugged them both and we headed out the door.
Jaron seemed distant as we rolled down the highway toward home, his elbow propped on the door, running his thumb across his bottom lip. I laid my head against his shoulder and pretended to fall asleep. Once we were home, his demeanor didn’t change much. It was killing me wondering what was up, but I was afraid he was mad at me for some reason and if he was choosing to be silent rather than explode, I didn’t want to set a match to the powder keg.
Jaron was already in bed by the time I washed my face and brushed my teeth and hair and slipped into a long tee shirt. He had his hands clasped behind his head looking up at the ceiling, still contemplating something. I slid in beside him, intent on snuggling in and going to sleep, with hopes that whatever this dark cloud was would be gone by morning.
“I don’t see any reason for you to go to college,” he said, breaking the silence.
“The reason, is because I want to,” I said in disbelief.
“Why,” he shrugged, turning his head to look at me.
“Because I don’t want to grow up to be a waitress like my mom. I want a career. I want to be able to take care of myself.”
“I will take care of you,” he said pointedly.
“And what if something happens to you, like it did my dad, then what? You don’t exactly live a risk free life Jaron.”
“It doesn’t matter. I will make sure you’re taken care of.”
I shook my head and rolled my eyes, “I want a degree. I want to know that I can take care of myself. I want to accomplish something in my life, be somebody.”
“You are somebody. You’re mine,” he said, dead serious.
I sat up, blinking rapidly, shaking my head, holding my hands up, “Do you even hear yourself? My whole life cannot be defined as Jaron Blake’s possession. Why don’t you just admit that you don’t want me to go to college because you’re jealous and you don’t trust me?”
“Alright, fine! I don’t trust you!” he shot back. “Tonight is prime example of why. First college boy you come across and in two seconds you’re practically creaming your panties, all giggling and smiling. What are you gonna do when there’s a room full of ‘em staring at your tits and your ass.”
“You are not making this decision for me Jaron. I am not skipping college because of your insecurities, so you better grow up between now and then,” I said huffily.
I threw back the covers and swung my legs out of bed. My feet barely hit the floor when I was pulled back and slammed against the mattress, my arms pinned above my head. I struggled to get loose. I had never resisted him before and I never spouted off so boldly. But this was my life, my future and it was not going to be decided by an insecure little boy with mommy issues.
He reached to the night stand and grabbed the leather belt, cinched it around my wrists and tied it to the spindle of the metal bed.
“Let me go Jaron,” I demanded, feeling a little panicked. He didn’t respond, only sneered down at me.
My breathing sped up as my heart thumped against my chest. He pushed his thigh against mine, spreading my legs, staring me in the eye. I searched the blue depths and underneath the agitation was a familiar storm. Just to be a shit, I bent my knees and dug my heels into his thighs and pushed, trying to push him away. He slapped them away, and put his right hand behind my knee, pushing my leg up toward my chest. He pressed into me and despite my agitation, my hips lifted to meet him.
“You’re the only one I cream my panties for asshole,” I said hatefully.
His lips drew up in a wicked smile. He sat back and pulled my panties off, stopping to run his thumb across the damp crotch and smiling before tossing them aside and tossing his shorts along with them.
“You’re not gonna be able to distract me with sex forever,” I closed my eyes and gasp when he slid two fingers inside me.
“Maybe I’ll just keep you tied up then,” he said, his voice a half whisper, his hand working me over making it impossible to respond.
My hips lifted and I clenched around his fingers. His free hand cupped my ass and pushed me further upward to meet his lips. He held me, suspended in the air as he licked and sucked me into oblivion. I cried out and shuddered, pulling against the leather around my wrists until it burned. By the end of the intense and brutally pleasurable screwing that followed, my hands were numb from pulling.
Jaron lay on his back; my naked body draped over his, my head on his chest and rubbed the red ring around my wrist softly.
“I hope it don’t bruise,” he said, lifting my hand from his chest and eyeing it. “You shouldn’t have pulled so hard.”
“I couldn’t help it,” I said shyly, blushing at the memory. “Are we putting the Christmas tree up tomorrow,” I asked randomly.
“Why would we put a Christmas tree up tomorrow?”
“We always put the tree up the day after Thanksgiving,” I explained.
“Oh, well, I guess we can if you want to. But I don’t have any decorations.”
“Do you not put up a Christmas tree?”
“No. Not since Grandpa died. Their old decorations are probably still in the attic. We can look or we can just go buy new ones, you can pick out whatever you want,” he ran his fingers through my hair.
“Really? You haven’t put up a tree in five years?”
“No. Why would I? It’s just me. It’s just not a big deal to me,” he said shrugging.
“Well, I like it, so we are putting up a tree.”
“Whatever you want baby,” he said, kissing my head.
I lay there wishing he was that agreeable about everything. Once again he had derailed the conversation about college, but at least I had spoken my mind and stood up for myself, and survived. I was pretty pleased with that. Maybe it would get a little better every time and by the time graduation rolled around, I would have him worn down.
A brand new tree with twinkling lights, shiny new ornaments and a star on top stood in the living room by nightfall. We sat on the couch in the glow of the tree and the fireplace. Jaron drank egg nog with a strong shot of Crown and I sipped on hot chocolate. It was times like these that I would always remember. When things were quiet and calm and Jaron was at peace.
“You know that I love you, right,” I whispered, not wanting to disturb the sweet silence too much.
He set his cup on the table, then took mine and set it down too and pulled me into his lap. He pulled the pony tail from my hair and massaged the back of my head.
“I do, I just don’t know why,” he whispered back, kissing my earlobe.
“Have you ever looked in the mirror,” I asked playfully.
He smirked, still playing with my hair. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, breathing deep as my body relaxed.
“You look like a Greek God,” I mumbled.
I raised my head and placed my lips near his ear, whispering extra quiet. “And the things you do to me, mmm,” I pressed my lips to his ear and exhaled slowly. I felt his chest heave.
“So that’s it? I’m good looking and good in bed?” He looked at me disappointed.
I tilted my head to look in his heaven colored eyes.
“I don’t know the why. I just know how I feel and I go with it. And this, it feels really good.”
“Yeah, it does,” he agreed and kissed me sweetly.
I started to move in for something a little more, when my phone sounded from the entry table.
; “Is that your phone,” he asked, his brow furrowed.
“Yep.” I hopped up to answer it.
“Who is it,” he frowned.
“My brother,” I said, holding the phone up as proof. “Hey Bub,” I answered chipper.
I really did miss him, especially around the holidays. Jaron propped his head on his hand and watched me closely as I stood across the room.
“Hey Nat. How’s it going?”
“Good. You have a good Thanksgiving?”
“Not really. I wanted to come home for a few days and visit, but I only got yesterday and today off, going back out on the rig tomorrow. How bout you?”
“We had a big dinner at Jaron’s sister’s house.”
“Why didn’t you see Mom?”
“I did Jake. She wouldn’t talk to me,” I answered, a little taken aback by his scolding tone.
Jaron summoned me to come back to the couch with a finger. I crossed the room slowly and plopped back down on the couch beside him.
“She said you went over there with Jaron.”
“He drove me, but he sat in the truck,” I explained.
“I can’t believe you’re choosing that thug over your own mom,” he said, his tone becoming more tense by the second.
Jaron turned his head and stared at me, his jaw clenched.
“I didn’t choose Jaron over mom, Jake. She chose Bill over me. Jaron wasn’t over there trying to force himself on her,” my voice started to become shaky with hurt feelings.
“Hang up the phone,” Jaron ordered.
“Tell your boyfriend to shut up and mind his own business. It if wasn’t for him we wouldn’t be having this conversation,” Jake retorted after overhearing Jaron.
“This is not Jaron’s fault. It’s Bill’s.”
“Hang up the phone,” Jaron repeated.
“Is that really what happened? You sure you didn’t exaggerate a little?” Jake questioned and I felt the lump straining my throat as it grew.
“You think I’m lying,” I asked in disbelief. Jake had always been on my side. I could always count him.