by Ivy Smoak
I was happy with my decision. The only thing that prevented me from being all in was the fact that my mom was so upset with me. I called her right after I signed the papers and she wouldn't stop crying. But I refused to feel guilty about enlisting. I needed to do this for me. It just sucked that an act that seemed selfless was maybe actually selfish on my part. If anything did happen to me, my mom would be alone. And I hated the thought of leaving her. I tried to focus on the road.
"Why didn't you feel like doing anything?"
This girl was starting to drive me crazy. "I think you mentioned that you wouldn't talk at all if I wanted that?"
She pressed her lips together. "Fine. I won't say another word." She hit the button for the radio and rap music blared loudly through the speakers. She didn't turn the volume down or ask to change the channel. Instead she just folded her arms across her chest and looked out the window.
The loud music made the car shake slightly. When I first left New York, I had been depressed. I had listened to old love ballads and sang at the top of my lungs like a little girl. But now? Now I was pissed. I was pissed for wasting so much time. Hailey was right. Nothing in life was certain. And I had thrown all my eggs into one basket like a fucking idiot. So I had turned to rap music because it seemed just as angry as me. But it didn't help soothe my soul. I was sick of being sad and I was sick of being angry. I just wasn't sure if I remembered how to feel normal anymore.
I sighed and turned down the volume. "I didn't mean that. I just don't want to talk about why I'm here. And I won't ask you. Deal?"
"Deal."
But we didn't start talking again. We drove in silence for hours until my eyelids started to grow heavy. When I saw an exit sign with a motel, I hit my turn signal.
"Are we stopping?" she asked.
I jumped a little when she spoke. I thought she was sound asleep. "Yeah."
She yawned and stretched her hands over her head. "You're sure you don't want me to just drive?"
"I'm sure."
We pulled into a gravelly parking lot and I put the car into park.
"Home sweet home," I said as I climbed out of the car. The night air was crisp, despite the fact that it was the middle of summer. I looked up at the stars. For some reason, they made me feel grounded. No matter how far I drove, the stars were always the same. They made me feel like one day I could be the same too. The way I was before Penny. Before she ever crawled under my skin. I opened up the back door and grabbed my two bags along with Hailey's duffel.
"I can get that," she said.
"It's fine." I pulled it over my shoulder. "Let's go check in."
She quickly followed me into the entrance. There was an old man sitting behind the desk sleeping. I cleared my throat and his eyes immediately opened. A smile spread across his face.
"Welcome to the Indy Inn. How many nights will you be staying with us?"
"One night. And two rooms please."
He looked back and forth between me and Hailey. "Alrighty." He grabbed two keys from behind his desk. "Room 202 and 203. Are adjoining rooms okay?" He set the keys down on the counter.
"That'll be fine."
"Are you paying separately?"
"Yes," Hailey quickly said from behind me.
"Okay, I just need a method of payment for your room first then," he said to me.
I pulled out my wallet and handed him my credit card.
He slid the card into the reader. "Alrighty, Mr. Stevens. I hope you enjoy your stay. Check out is at 9 a.m."
"Great. Thanks." I picked up one of the keys off the counter and stepped to the side to wait for Hailey.
"And I'll need a method of payment for you as well, ma'am," he said.
"Of course." She rummaged around in her purse and pulled out a wallet. "You can go ahead, Tyler."
"It's okay, I can wait."
"No, it's fine. I left my phone in the car anyway so I have to go back and grab it."
"I can go get it for you while you check in."
"No, really, it's okay. It's late. Go get some sleep."
I wasn't going to fight with her. She was right, I was exhausted. I pulled the duffel bag off my shoulder and set it on the ground. "See you in the morning, then, Hailey."
"Mhm."
I walked back out into the parking lot. I hit the button to unlock the car and made my way up the stairs to my room. Before I went into my room, I looked back over my shoulder. She hadn't come back out yet. I went into the room, switched on the lights, and closed the door behind me.
It looked like any other motel I had ever been in. A little dingy and a little musty smelling. It was becoming homey to me. I pulled my toothbrush and toothpaste out of one of the plastic bags and quickly got ready. Before I climbed into bed, I stared at the door between our adjoining rooms. I opened up the door on my side. Hers was still closed.
I wasn't exactly sure what I was doing. But it felt strange not saying goodnight to her. I tapped on the door. "Hailey?"
There was no answer. She must have already fallen asleep.
"Goodnight," I whispered to no one in particular.
***
I knocked on her door again. "Hailey?"
I had tried her when I had come back after my run to let her know I'd be ready to get going again soon. But she had still been sleeping. Check out was in ten minutes now. I knocked on the door a little louder. "Hailey?"
No answer.
I'd try again in a few minutes. I carried my bags down the stairs and walked over to the car. And that's when I saw her. She was curled up in the back seat of my car, her head resting on her duffel bag. It felt like I was seeing something I wasn't supposed to see, like I was intruding.
She had slept in the car? I scratched the back of my neck. Shit. I had let her spend the night in the car.
I thought back to when I had told her she should just fly to California. She said she didn't have the money. Why hadn't I offered to share a room with her? What was wrong with me?
Chapter 7
Hailey
Saturday
A tapping sound made me open up my eyes. I wiped the drool off the side of my face. For a second I forgot where I was. I looked out the window of the car to see a handsome face with the most breathtaking blue eyes staring back at me. And then I remembered where I was. And I remembered who that face belonged to. Crap. I quickly sat up and ran my fingers through my hair.
Tyler opened up the door. His lips parted like he was about to say something, but he immediately closed them again.
I plastered a fake smile to my face. "It took you long enough," I said with a laugh. "I was hoping to get on the road early."
"What?"
"I came down here hours ago hoping you'd be ready soon. I must have fallen asleep waiting."
He frowned. "Hailey, if you..."
"What?" I laughed again. "Now I know you like to sleep late. Give me one second, though, I need to use the bathroom before we head out."
He didn't say anything as I stepped out of the car. I felt my cheeks burning as I quickly walked toward the entrance of the motel. He knows. It was all over his face. And despite the fact that I had done some quality acting, he didn't seem to believe me. I didn't need his pity. I could afford to stay in a motel if I really wanted. But it wasn't just about me. Money was literally the key to life and death right now. I wasn't going to waste it on some crappy room in a motel that was just as good as the back seat of a car.
The man behind the front desk lifted his head as I made my way inside. "Was he happy that you ended up wanting to share a room? I'm sure he was glad you changed your mind."
I was so relieved Tyler hadn't followed me in to hear the lie I had told the owner last night. "Yup," I said. "Do you have a restroom I could use?"
"Second door on the left."
"Thanks."
I hurried into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. My reflection gave it all away. My makeup was smudged and my hair was a mess. I splashed water on my face and pulle
d my toothbrush out of my purse. I needed to be more careful next time. Tyler was already driving me across the country. I didn't need him to give me any more handouts. Maybe I'd offer to pay for breakfast just to prove I had money. That was a solid idea. I flushed the toilet and washed my hands. I applied a little makeup and then made my way out of the restroom.
"Have a good day, ma'am," the man at the front desk said.
"You too." I made my way back outside.
Tyler was leaning against his car with his hands in his pockets. He looked up at me as I approached. "You could have told me." He pushed himself off the car and stared at me. There was something accusatory in his gaze. He had no right to accuse me of something he knew nothing about.
"Told you what?" I climbed into the car and closed the door before I could hear his response.
He sat down in the driver's seat, but didn't start the car.
"I really don't know what you're talking about," I said.
"Hailey..."
"Look, I'm starving. Let's go get something to eat. I'm paying."
"I would have paid for your room."
"Jesus, Tyler, get over yourself. I'm not asking for your help, okay? I'm not a charity case. Please can we just go eat?" I bit the inside of my cheek. I didn't mean to snap at him. But I didn't need anything from him. I didn't need anything from anybody. And it was starting to eat away at me that I was on my way to California to beg for money. I wasn't a beggar. This wasn't me.
He didn't look at me as he started the ignition.
I turned away from him and pulled my feet up onto the seat as I wrapped my arms around my shins. The last thing I needed was some beautiful stranger judging my choices. I already felt guilty enough for leaving my dad.
He let me silently fume as he drove back toward the highway. He pulled over to a diner near the end of the road.
"Is this okay?" he asked gently.
"Yeah, this is great."
He got out of the car before I could say anything else. I scurried out behind him. He held the door of the restaurant open for me. I tried to ignore the fact that no one had done that for me in years. It's not like this was a date. He was basically my chauffeur for the next few days, nothing more.
"Table for two?" the woman asked. She seemed bored out of her mind. The diner looked like it hadn't had its decor updated since the 60's. The floor was even black and white checkered. I was surprised the waitresses weren't rolling around on roller skates.
"Yes," I said cheerily.
She looked up at me like she was annoyed by my positive attitude. "Right this way." She grabbed two menus and showed us to a table. "Emery will be right with you."
I slid into the booth and Tyler slid into the seat across from me. He picked up his menu and scanned over the options.
Yesterday I felt like there was this flirtatious vibe between us. Today, not so much. I wanted to go back to that. I didn't want to drive across the country with someone who didn't even feel comfortable looking at me.
The waitress walked over. She was young, probably in high school, and her eyes were glued on Tyler like she had never seen anyone sexier in her life.
I rolled my eyes.
"Hi, I'm Emery and I'll be taking care of you today. Can I start you off with something to drink?"
"I'm ready to order if you are," Tyler said to me.
"Sure."
"Ladies first," he said.
"Could I just have an omelet with spinach and Swiss cheese. And a water."
Emery wrote it down in her notepad. "And for you?" She batted her eyelashes.
Tyler didn't seem to notice. Maybe he was gay.
"I'll just have a bagel with cream cheese. And some coffee, please."
"Sure thing. Just wave me down if you need anything else." She grabbed the menus and gave Tyler one last huge smile before she walked away with way too much shake in her hips.
"Who names their kid Emery?" I said. "It's basically like naming them Nail File."
Tyler laughed. "You sound jealous."
"Jealous of what? Some girl who works at a diner who wants in your pants? I don't think so."
He leaned back in the booth and stared at me.
"What are you looking at?" I awkwardly tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.
"Let's play 21 questions."
"What's that?"
"You've seriously never played 21 questions?"
I shook my head.
"We each get to ask each other 21 questions and we have to answer honestly no matter what. But we each get one pass."
"I don't know..."
"It's fun. I promise."
I stared at him skeptically. "Fine, you go first."
"Okay. What's your last name?"
"Shaw."
He nodded, as if satisfied by my answer. It seemed like a waste of a question if we only got 21, but it was better than him asking me why I had suddenly decided to become a hitchhiker.
"Thanks," he said to the waitress as she set down our drinks, without taking his eyes off me. "Your turn."
"Well I already know your last name, Tyler Stevens." If I asked him why he left New York, he'd certainly ask me the same thing. I needed to keep it safe too. "What's your favorite color?" Crap, that was just as lame as the question he asked me.
He smiled. "Green. What's your favorite food?"
"Pizza. Isn't it everyone's?"
"Is that your question to me?"
I shook my head. "No." I didn't want to repeat any of his questions.
Emery walked by again, clearly trying to get his attention, but he didn't even look toward her. I watched him pick up his coffee and take a sip, seemingly oblivious to her flirtations. Had he seemed oblivious to mine last night? I had kind of thought he seemed into me. But he had gotten distracted by the TV while we were talking. And it wasn't even because of a game. It was the news.
"Are you gay?"
He immediately spit the coffee back into the cup. "No. Why would you ask that?"
"You seem awfully defensive."
"I'm not gay." He lowered his voice slightly. "Seriously, why do you think I'm gay?"
I shrugged. "Don't get all upset about it. I was just wondering."
"Well, I'm not."
"Okay then. Question answered. Your turn."
He stared at me. He was even cuter when he was flustered. "Are you seeing anyone right now?"
"Are you trying to prove you're not gay or something?"
"It's not your turn for a question, Hailey."
I sighed. "No, I'm not in a relationship. What about you?"
He took a sip of his coffee and then set it back down. "No. How many boyfriends have you had?"
I shrugged my shoulders. "Technically just one. Back in high school."
"That's a long time ago."
"Well, I'm not as old as you."
"Who's defensive now?" he said.
"I'm not being defensive. When was your last relationship, hotshot?"
He ignored me as the waitress put our food down in front of us.
"Is there anything else I can get for you?" she asked and batted her eyelashes at him again.
This time, he smiled at her. I knew he was just trying to prove something, but I couldn't deny that I was a little jealous.
"Not right now," Tyler said. "Thanks, Emery."
"Sure thing." She smiled at him before walking away.
"Such a dumb name," I said under my breath.
Chapter 8
Tyler
Saturday
Things had just taken an unexpected turn. Yes, Hailey had flirted with me last night. But that was her job. It was a tip game. She was so hot and cold that half the time it seemed like she hated me and the other half of the time it seemed like she wanted to jump me. Right now she was acting like the latter, and I wasn't going to deny that I was flattered. Although my lack of game had made her think I was gay, which didn't really help my current mood.
The fact was that Hailey was gorgeous. Did I dream
about what her tits looked like beneath her tight tank top? Yeah. But anyone who met her would probably dream of that. It didn't mean anything. The more jealous she seemed to get, the more appealing I found her pout, though. But I wasn't going to try to sleep with her. The last thing I needed was a random lay to get over my own problems. I had tried that before. It didn't work. And anything with Hailey would be meaningless, because in a few days I'd be dropping her off in California and I'd be heading to basic training. I'd never see her again.
But it didn't mean we couldn't both tiptoe around the idea of something more. It didn't mean I had to avoid staring at her long legs as she climbed in the car. Or her breasts when she leaned close to me. I was just going to enjoy this. Because even though I had set out to be alone on this trip and think, I was enjoying myself much more now that I had company.
"You didn't answer my question," she said and took a bite of her omelet. "When was your last relationship?"
"How long does it have to last in order to be considered a relationship?"
"The length doesn't matter. But it only counts if you had the girlfriend, boyfriend talk. The labels and everything."
"Yeah. Gotcha. My last relationship ended one week ago."
She nodded like she suddenly understood me completely. "Sorry," she said.
"Yeah. I feel bad about the way I left things, but I'm not really that upset about it. She was a great girl, but we weren't really that compatible."
"So why the sudden need to drive to California, then?"
"It's not your turn. How many guys have you slept with?"