“Daddy!” screeched Chloe suddenly.
From the entrance to the courtyard behind Alec, a familiar figure emerged. A man with milk chocolate skin and a killer smile. He was wearing basketball shorts and a T-shirt with the sleeves cut off, which showed the definition in his arms. It looked like he’d just finished working out.
I rose from the bench. “Mike?”
“Oh God,” muttered Amy.
“What’s this?” Mike asked, grinning. Any tension that had existed between him and Alec dissipated as they shook hands, and exchanged a small nod. Men.
“I found this thing running around wild,” Alec told him. “Rabid, I think.”
“I’ll take care of it,” Mike said. “Come here, thing.” He took the giggling little girl, and planted a noisy kiss on her cheek.
“You’re Chloe’s dad,” I said, trying to catch up. Now that they were together I could see the resemblance. Same nose. Same beautiful brown eyes.
“Chloe’s very handsome, very single, dad,” he said, glancing at Amy.
My brows shot up.
“Who wants mac and cheese?” called Miss Iris, coming down the open stairway.
“Iris!” The smile returned back to Alec’s eyes as he met her at the base of the stairs and took the foil container of pasta. She said something to him that I couldn’t hear, then patted his cheek and kissed him right on the mouth. My mind was spinning at this point. I glanced at Amy, who was staring, openmouthed, at Mike.
“Isn’t this nice?” said Iris. “So good of you to get everyone together, Amy.”
Amy made a noise that sounded like something was caught in her throat.
“Didn’t know you’d met my mom.” Mike set his daughter down to give me a hug.
“I didn’t know she was your mom,” I said.
He chuckled. “Small world.”
“I guess so.”
Mike turned to Amy, who was still holding the lighter fluid in one hand, and clutching her daughter against her side with the other.
“Amy, right?” He reached out his hand. “I’m Mike. We haven’t met.”
She held out the lighter fluid, which he took with a gracious, if somewhat confused, smile.
“Oh boy.” I rushed to her side, skirting by Alec, who was still talking to Iris.
“Mike is Alec’s friend,” I said, inserting myself on the other side of Paisley. “They go way back—as far as you and me.”
“Oh.” Amy nodded a little too vigorously. I’d never seen her this way with a man before. Even when we were in high school she was always very assertive.
“Amy and I met when we were fourteen,” I told Mike. “We work together at the salon now. Amy’s a stylist.”
“I cut hair,” said Amy.
“You have any suggestions for me?” Mike asked, running one hand over his smooth, shaved head.
She laughed, and finally relaxed a little.
“You did a good job with Chloe’s mop,” said Mike, glancing at his daughter affectionately. “You were all she talked about for a week.”
I was impressed; I didn’t know Amy had done all those twisty braids. It shouldn’t have surprised me though. She was enormously talented when it came to hair.
I glanced from Mike to Amy, and then back. There was a clear connection between them. Mike wasn’t hiding the fact that he was checking her out, and Amy was alternating between doing the same, and staring at her feet.
Alec’s best friend with my best friend. Both of them with girls the same age. Regardless of what was going on in my relationship, the thought of Mike and Amy together nearly made me giddy.
“Can I borrow you?” Alec was standing close behind me, and as I turned, my pulse kicked up a notch. I blushed, remembering the feel of a shipping crate beneath my flexed hands.
“Sure.”
We walked toward a pond in the center of the courtyard. It was a nice day, and a few other families were out. People were laughing, children were playing, all of them oblivious to the uncertainty rolling through me.
“I owe you another apology.” He walked a foot away, hands in his pockets. He was tired, I could see that now. He could put on a show in front of the others, but not for me.
I didn’t want to be that person to him, the one who made him feel like he couldn’t do anything right. But I was mad. It wasn’t the first time we’d done something intimate and then he’d gone AWOL.
“I’m sorry,” he said, tilting his head to meet my eyes.
“Who was that woman on the phone?” I asked. “I heard her call for you.”
He turned to face the pond. “She’s with the FBI. They’d asked me not to contact anyone.”
The air whooshed from my lungs; I hadn’t even been aware I was holding my breath.
“What did they say?”
“Same stuff. More questions about Max. Things I saw. Things he asked me to do. I told them about Reznik, and they’re going to keep eyes on him for a while.”
“That’s good.”
He nodded.
“I thought you might have been with her. The woman on the phone.”
He reached for my hand now.
“Anna,” he said, letting my name linger. There was disappointment in his tone, but I knew it was more for him than it was for me.
He wove our fingers together, and lifted them to his lips.
“You never have to worry about that,” he said.
I moved closer, relieved, but I still felt like something was off between us. Maybe it was just my imagination.
“I don’t want to feel far away from you,” I said. Ever since he’d come back we’d had moments of closeness, but they only seemed to kick us farther apart.
He took my hand and wrapped it around his back, pulling me to him.
“I don’t know how to hold on to you,” he admitted.
Behind her came a shriek of joy. The girls were chasing Mike around the picnic table while Iris and Amy prepared the food.
I pressed my forehead to his chest, wrapping him tighter in my arms.
“Yes, you do,” I said. “You just don’t let go.”
He kissed the top of my head.
“So,” he said. “Mike and Amy, huh?”
I smirked, relieved that he’d taken off some of the pressure.
At that moment, Chloe and Paisley came bounding over the grass toward us. Paisley’s expression changed in stages. She was having fun, pure childhood delight in her eyes. Then they landed on Alec, and they turned cautious, and then wary. I’d warned Alec she might be this way, but was sad to see it happen.
“You must be Paisley,” he said, crouching down before the two girls.
It helped that Chloe knew Alec. Paisley stood a little behind her, pulling at the end of her grass-stained yellow shirt, but seemed braver with her friend there.
“He’s a friend of mine, Paisley,” I said.
“He was kissing you,” said Chloe. “Are you guys getting married?”
“Yes,” said Alec.
I laughed, half wondering if he was serious. Probably not. Of course not. He was just teasing the girls.
“He’s kidding,” I said when Paisley looked at me with round eyes.
He cupped his hands over his mouth and whispered, “I’m not kidding.”
All right. Simmer down, butterflies. But they were beating their wings hard enough they might have been going ballistic.
Paisley stepped forward and smacked Alec on the arm, then ducked behind Chloe again. It surprised me so much, I didn’t know what to say.
“Tag, you’re it,” she said in a tiny voice. Chloe giggled.
Alec rose slowly, a serious expression on his face. Paisley took a step back.
“I’ll give you five seconds’ head start,” Alec said.
With a scream, they bounded
off. Alec kissed me on the lips for exactly five seconds—just long enough to steal my breath—and then he chased after them.
Twenty-one
The hamburgers were good, but not as good as Miss Iris’s mac and cheese, and not nearly as good as the company. We laughed and played with the girls, polished off a key lime pie that Mike had brought, and let the hours slip away. Watching Alec and Paisley warmed me. He had the same gift that my father did with troubled kids. He probably would have done a good job getting through to Jacob.
Alec made an extra effort to help Amy with anything she needed, and grinned as Miss Iris told funny stories about him and Mike when they were kids. It was obvious they had a soft spot for each other, and that pleased me, too. I was glad he had an adopted mom like I did, even if it wasn’t on paper.
Everything appeared to be going well. Until it wasn’t.
Amy was clearing the table, hands full of dishes to take upstairs for leftovers, when a gust of wind blew through the courtyard. It caught the underside of one of the plates, causing her to juggle to keep everything upright. Mike, standing in front of her, jumped forward to help, and it must have scared Amy, because she dropped everything.
Which would have been nothing, except for the fact that she blocked her face with her arms, as if she thought Mike was going to hit her.
Paisley was on her feet within seconds. She took one look at Mike, then her mom, and before Amy could lower her hands and laugh about what had happened, she was off like a shot, running up the stairs into their apartment.
“Paisley!” I called after her. But I didn’t follow, because Amy’s face was white as a ghost.
“Amy?” I’d risen from my seat, and put my hand on her shoulder. She jerked back, as if I’d broken her from some trance, and stared at the ground, where the remnants of our food were strewn across the grass.
“Easy,” said Mike, holding his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“I can’t believe . . .” She dropped to her knees and immediately began to clean up. “So stupid.”
I glanced up at Alec, who confirmed my suspicions with a look of pity.
I crouched beside Amy. “Let me help you.”
“Where’s Paisley?” she asked quietly.
“Upstairs.”
“Shit.” She rose, and without explanation, walked quickly to the stairs. I nodded at Alec, who I knew would take care of things out here, and followed my friend.
I didn’t catch up with her until we were inside. She was in Paisley’s room, kneeling on the floor in front of her bed. It took me a moment to realize her daughter was hiding beneath the mattress.
“Pais, honey, come on out. Mommy wants to talk to you.”
Amy’s voice broke.
“Paisley, now!” She started to cry.
Slowly, I approached, feeling too many things at the same time. Sadness, and rage, and anger, because how had I never seen this before? I’d known Amy since we were in high school. I’d come after Danny left. I’d talked to her almost every day of our adult lives, even when I’d lived in different states. I was a social worker, for God’s sake, and had grown up in an unstable home. If anyone knew the signs of abuse, it was me.
And then came the hurt, because she’d never told me.
“Give her a second,” I said gently, and after a moment, Amy stood, and met me in the hallway.
“Amy, I’m sorry,” I said, the tears filling my eyes now, too.
She began to pace nervously, just a few steps back and forth, back and forth. I couldn’t hold her in place even if I tried.
“God, that’s embarrassing,” she said quickly. “That wind came out of nowhere.”
“Amy.”
“Mike probably thinks I’m a freak.”
“Amy.”
“I kind of thought maybe it was kismet, you know? Both of us with girls the same age. Magic Mike being my favorite movie . . .”
I took a slow breath.
“Good thing Jonathan never showed. That would have been a real shit storm.”
I hadn’t remembered Jonathan was invited until she’d just mentioned it.
“He didn’t call?” I asked.
“He texted. Said he got stuck with some work stuff.” She crossed her arms over her chest, and checked the open door to Paisley’s room.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, keeping my voice quiet.
“It’s not a big deal,” she said. “I only went out with him once.”
“About Danny.” I hated that she was making me say it, but I knew I had to, because she needed me to be strong right now. “He hit you.”
Her tears came on with full force.
“Stop,” she said, then went back to the doorway of her daughter’s room. “Paisley? Come out, honey. Let’s go back outside and play.”
“Amy.” I blocked her way, and didn’t let her pass. “I’m your best friend. You can talk to me.”
“Not about that,” she said after a moment.
“Why?”
“Because I stayed!” she said, this time loud enough that Paisley might have heard. Immediately she lowered her voice. “Because I stayed. And Paisley saw it happen, and I stayed anyway.”
My fingers wove together, squeezed until they shook. Amy’s self-sabotaged relationships. Her sensitivity to the danger Alec had brought into my life. Paisley’s fear of strangers and the way she’d stopped talking after her father had left. She’d known just what to do when her mom had reacted the way she had outside. Run and hide.
My heart was breaking.
“It happened a lot?” I asked, hating myself for every time I’d been in this apartment, talked to her, hugged her, without knowing. Hating myself for asking this stupid question. Once was too much.
“It happened enough.” Her face scrunched up as she tried to hold back the sob. “My baby saw him hurt me, and I told her it was okay, and I was okay, and Daddy didn’t mean it. I said that to her knowing it was bullshit.”
“It’s over,” I said. “He’s gone.”
“Because he left,” she said, the disgust ripe in her voice. “I didn’t kick him out. He left on his own.”
Then the strongest woman I’d ever seen fell to her knees, and covered her mouth with her hands, as if trying to hold herself back from saying any more.
It was risky touching her now, when touch had been used against her, but I did it anyway. I hugged her as hard as I could, and I cried with her.
“It’s okay now,” I said. “We’re all okay.”
* * *
Paisley finally came out, and while she and Amy talked on the bed, I cleaned up the kitchen. Alec and Mike had closed up shop outside, and the last of the leftovers were brought to Iris’s house.
After a while, Alec knocked on the door. When I opened it, I stared at him standing in the threshold, and let the gratitude wash over me.
He was not without faults. He’d seen more than his fair share of trouble, and when he screwed up, he screwed up big. He kept too many secrets, carried too much weight, and was as stubborn as a mule. But he would never hurt me. Not like Amy’s ex-husband had hurt her.
“How’s everything going?” He didn’t come inside. I’m not sure he would have unless Amy herself had invited him.
“Okay,” I said. “I think I should stay.”
He nodded.
Amy emerged from Paisley’s room then, her face pale, her eyes red and puffy.
“Go,” she said. “We’re good here.”
I was torn. If Amy needed me now, I wanted to be close.
“Really, you should go.” She looked over her shoulder to where her daughter was curled around her favorite teddy bear. “Paisley and I have some stuff we need to talk about.”
I hugged her, and went to grab my purse from her bedroom. While I was there, I heard Alec’
s low voice from the doorway, and paused to listen.
“Thanks for inviting me, Amy.”
“Some party, huh?” She laughed dryly.
Awkward silence followed. I started to come out, but stopped when Alec spoke again.
“Amy . . .” He hesitated. “Anna’s important to me. I’d do anything for her. And because you’re important to her, I’d do anything for you, too. I want you to know that.”
My heart did one slow roll in my chest. As I stepped out of the room, I saw the way he looked at my best friend—not like she was fragile, or like he was afraid she would lose it—but like she was made of fucking iron.
I loved him more than ever then.
Amy’s shoulders rose with a shudder, then fell, as I returned to the front door.
“Good speech,” she said, voice raw from crying. “All that practicing paid off.”
He smiled at her, and with a promise from Amy to call me later, we left.
* * *
“I heard what you told her,” I said when we reached the parking lot. “Thank you.” The sunset cast long shadows across the pavement, reminding me how quickly the afternoon had passed.
Alec’s Jeep was in the spot next to mine, and he leaned against it.
“It’s true,” he said.
I stayed a step back. “And what you told the girls outside.” That you want to marry me. “Was that true?”
He grinned, and crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you think?”
A red alert sounded over my already raw emotions. Before I did something entirely too memorable, like speaking in tongues, I turned away to look back at the apartment.
The guilt, of all things, settled me.
“I should have known something was happening,” I said.
“It’s not always easy to see.”
“If you aren’t looking,” I insisted. “I should have paid more attention. I will now.”
“It’s not your fault, you know.”
I shook my head. It wasn’t, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t let them down. Amy would never think that, but it was true. And I wouldn’t do it again.
The Distraction Page 17