by Brenda Elser
When the doors opened again they were safely at the top without a single speck of Luck Dust left on either of them. There they found Reese intently examining the cause of Leprechaun Land’s Luck shortage.
“Cool!” Robert shouted. But Reese’s face was clouded with anger. On top of the tooth, looking for all the world like a huge filling, was a deep golden pool. The fans they had seen from the ground were drawing the Golden dust from the sky and depositing it into the pool in trickles.
“Well this brings a whole new meaning to the saying ‘just my Luck,’” Robert scoffed. “Apparently everyone’s Luck is Diva’s Luck!”
“We can’t leave it this way!” Reese said, the tips of her ears growing red with anger. “This evil Diva did not earn the Luck! She’s stealing it. This could destroy Leprechaun society. We have to do something!”
“Of course. But we have to save Lauren too,” Eva reminded her.
“I have an idea.” Robert slung his backpack from his shoulders and rooted around until he had produced a small hammer, some nails and a water bottle.
“Of course, he brought a hammer and nails…” Eva muttered to herself. “What can’t a hammer or some candy fix?” She shook her head, thinking she should write down a list of “standard” adventure tools in her Jr. Detective notebook so they didn’t lug around unnecessary weight all the time.
“Reese saw a crack in the tooth over here, remember?” he said. “Maybe we can make the crack bigger and drain the Luck from the pool.” He walked over to the edge of the tooth roof and ran his fingers along the crack. “Is this what you saw?” Reese nodded.
Robert gently hammered a nail into the gap causing it to fracture and split. When the crack stopped, he moved to its end and hammered the next nail, each time moving closer to the Golden pool. In time he had hammered ten nails along the split, like he was laying rail road tracks, and now the crack reached from the edge of the roof all the way to the edge of the pool. Reese held her breath as Robert hammered away at the edge of the pool until they saw the Golden liquid Luck begin to seep its way into the crevice and flow along the broken tooth until it reached the edge. Once at the edge, it seeped down the side of the tooth home in a Golden stream, while some of it scattered back into the wind.
“That should do it,” Robert said leaning over the edge and watching the crack begin to extend down the side. He stood up and turned to his friends with a grin, “Let’s take a quick dip before it’s all gone. Last one in is a rotten tooth!”
“I don’t know…” Reese hesitated. “This is stolen Luck.”
Eva took her hand, “We’ll need some to save Lauren. I thought this is what you meant when you suggested your people share Luck for a greater purpose.”
Reese looked back at her and squeezed her hand with a nod. “Yes. To save Lauren.” Then they ran after Robert holding hands and laughing.
At the edge of the Luck pool they paused and Reese shouted, “For Lauren!” She pinched her nose and leaped from the side, cannon-balling with such a splash that Robert had to wipe the Golden ‘liquid’ from his hair.
He looked at Eva and said, “Ready? One… Two… Thrrr…” But before he could finish, Eva had already pushed him in.
“Three!” she shouted, and jumped in after him.
Under different circumstances, and if they’d had more time, the children would have spent time playing. But there was a Tournament to win, and Lauren to rescue, and so their swimming had to end.
When they emerged, they were again covered head to toe in Gold that dried on them in sticky Golden sparkles. “And now a little something in case we run into some guards,” Robert said, leaning down and filling up the empty water bottle he had pulled from his pack.
“We’re going to need to disable the fans,” Reese said. “Otherwise, they’ll just keep sucking the Luck back here.”
“How do we do that?” Robert asked. “Can’t we just wish the fans to stop working?”
“We’ve used Luck in some pretty big ways and you saw how quickly it’s lost,” Reese replied. “I think you have the wrong idea about it. Wishing and Luck can help, but they shouldn’t replace good engineering and solid work. It’s like my Da always used to say: ‘Don’t go wastin’ yer wishes when ye can use yer noggin.’ If we wished for everything, we’d end up tripping over bikes and toys and money everywhere. It would ruin our economy.”
The children stared at her. It was exactly the same thing they’d heard about wishes in Fairy Land.
Reese walked over to each of the fans, ripping out the cords as she went, causing the wires to split and fray. Then she turned and grinned at them, holding up the ruined wires. “There. That was some solid work. Now, let’s go find your friend. I saw a door by one of the fan sockets. Over here.”
The friends moved from the quickly-emptying pool in search of their way down from the roof. “This must be what Diva uses to access the roof when she needs Luck,” Eva said when they stood in front of a heavy stone door.
“Wait! Don’t open it yet,” Reese said, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a large leaf. “This is a Lily Fern Fumble,” she told them. “I can hear what’s on the other side of doors and walls with this.” She rolled the leaf into a tube which she held to her ear, listening intently for any sounds inside. “It’s quiet. I think we’re safe,” she said reaching for the handle.
“It’s not locked!” Eva said in amazement as she watched Reese turn the knob easily.
“Well, go on,” Robert urged. “That crack is getting bigger by the second!”
Reese nodded and pushed her shoulder to the door when it was suddenly yanked open from the other side. The children gasped in horror as they now stood face to face with a lumpy, yellow and brown man clothed in a filthy military-looking uniform.
Or… they would have been face to face had the man been given a face. He seemed to be sculpted of clay with the necessary arms and legs, but the sculptor forgot to give the man any markings of eyelids or lips. He didn’t appear to even have much of a nose. The two blobs that passed as ears stood away from the larger blob of his head and the neck that supported it seemed to mold right into the uniform he wore.
Reese screamed as he stepped forward and effortlessly picked her up.
Robert launched himself at the man, kicking him in the shins, but he left only the soft imprint of his shoe on the clay man’s leg. “Yuck! What are you?” he cried, sticking out his tongue in disgust. Jumping to the side to avoid the man’s reach, he stumbled into a second uniformed clay man who had come through the doorway and grabbed Robert from behind. Before Robert could clamp his mouth shut, his outstretched tongue licked his captor’s arm and he gagged, “Ear wax! I’m gonna hurl! These guys are made of ear wax!”
Reese screamed louder, trying to bring her hands near her mouth to make a wish, but the wax man held her arms firmly at her side while another pounced on Eva.
It was a quick ambush, and each guard was mindful to hold the children with their arms down so they were unable to make a wish. “Mmm… Stopp strugggling,” the first waxman said from the slit in its blank, lumpy face. Its voice sounded deep and heavy. “Divvva is waiting for you bbelow.”
“Uchh, your breath is disgusting,” Eva said turning her head away.
“Put me down!” Reese shouted kicking back at her captor’s legs with all her strength.
But their screams and struggles didn’t affect the guards at all. In fact, they didn’t seem to notice much of anything on their own. They methodically carried the wiggling children into a narrow, grey hall that looked as though it was made of polished granite, down one stairwell and through several chambers until, after a dizzying number of turns, they finally descended a grand curved stairwell and reached the ground floor.
Another wax man met them there and led them across a black and white tiled entry. Turning to the others, he droned, “Pput them in the livving roomm with the other onne.” He opened a set of ornate double doors and ushered the guards inside, where they simultaneously r
eleased the children onto the shiny floor.
After an unceremonious kick, the guards turned to leave while the children slipped and skidded their way to the far side of the room, only stopping once they had tumbled against the distant wall in a heap. Then the door slammed shut with a ‘bang’ that echoed in the hard cold room.
In the silence, Robert groaned trying to sit up. “Well, what now?”
Eva felt a hand on her shoulder, and while she should have felt cheered that none of them were hurt, she just wanted to lie on the floor and feel sorry for herself for a while. It seemed nothing was going right.
“Eva? Is that you? Robert? You guys are all Golden! What in the world did you fall in this time?”
Eva opened her eyes and stared into the green eyes of her best friend. “Lauren!” Eva cried reaching up and hugging her. “We found you!”
Lauren tried to hug Eva back but she slipped and fell on top of her instead.
“Sorry,” Lauren laughed. “The wax guards make everything around here so slippery!”
“Are you okay?” Robert asked reaching out to steady her.
“I’m fine. I thought maybe she was trying to bore me death! She just has me sitting here all day. No TV. No books. Hmph! It’s dreadful, I tell you!”
Eva hugged her tighter. “Well, we’re getting out of here now, and believe me – you won’t need TV when I tell you the story of how we got here.” She pointed at Reese, who was trying to right her hat. “That’s Reese,” she said. Reese gave her a grin. “She is an actual real Leprechaun!”
“And I outwitted a troll!” Robert said, jumping up and catching himself before he slipped to the ground again. Undeterred, he continued, “And Reese is actually one hundred years old. And there’s a pool at the top of this house filled with Gold! And can you believe Diva actually chose another tooth house to live in – even though she’s not even a real Tooth Fairy anymore?”
Lauren blinked back and forth at her friends.
Reese laughed, “I know. There’s a lot to share… but seriously,” she continued, “who lives in a tooth made of polished stone and uses disgusting ear wax as guards?”
“I do, my dear,” snarled a voice at the doorway.
13. Great Cleaners But No Brains
Diva stood in the doorway sneering at the jumble of children across the room. She wore a flowing fancy evening dress that glinted with familiar Golden Luck Dust as she walked. Her gown was off the shoulder and snug around the top of her slightly plump figure. It appeared she’d stepped into the Luck pool deep enough to reach the bodice of her dress because the Gold stopped there and she looked as though she wore elbow-length Golden gloves. Her white hair was piled high and she had adorned it with a large Golden tiara that looked very much like a crown. As usual, she wore a great deal of makeup, but Eva noticed that Diva had one obvious change: The fairy wings that had been on her back when they saw her last were now gone.
“I’m delighted you accepted my invitation for a swap,” Diva drawled, glaring at the children as she stepped into the room with wax guards following her. They lurched with squishy, squeaky steps until they blocked the door and surrounded the children. “And I see you brought an uninvited guest… I guess I shouldn’t be surprised at your manners considering the way you acted in my home the last time we met.”
“Why would you use ear wax guards in a polished stone home, uh tooth… Whatever this place is!” Reese asked, standing up (then slipping, and sitting back down).
“It makes perfect sense, stupid girl!” Diva chided her. “They polish the place simply by walking around. I mean, I get house cleaners and guards all in one! It’s a bargain.”
“Where do you find such disgusting household help? First the Rot Guards and now them?” Robert pointed at the ear wax men and attempted to stand up. “Do you know I accidently licked one?”
“Serves you right!” Diva cackled. “But to answer your question, it is very hard for decaying and rotten things to find work. I’m one of the few who advertises for their help. Like I said, it’s a bargain. Humans are so thoughtless! You create them and then just throw them away and there they remain – in Nowhere Land – until someone is able to find use for them.”
“Lady, I don’t think you should be talking about our manners!” yelled Eva, who could not stand it anymore. “You kidnapped our friend!” She stood up and braced herself, awkwardly skating forward on the waxy floor, pointing a finger at Diva.
“Ohh… Cool,” Robert whispered, looking at Lauren and Reese to make sure they noticed Eva’s slide as well. The girls nodded quietly back at his silent message and smiled.
“I should think my note explained all of that,” Diva hissed. “You owe me some baby teeth! After all, it was your idea to give them to me and now look. I’ve had to move out of my beautifully remodeled tooth home in elegant Fairy Land to the back woods of Leprechaun Land!” She threw up her hands and gestured around her, shaking her head.
Eva narrowed her eyes at Diva, giving her the stink eye. “We aren’t going to give you anything! You stole the Halloween candy and you put us in your Decaying Dungeon!”
“Yes, well… I won’t make that mistake again!” Diva said. “I’ll take your baby teeth now, thank you!” She raised her palms and blew a steady stream of Golden Luck into the room until only the tips of her shoes remained gold.
The cloud lassoed Reese first, and she was instantly wrapped from neck to toe in golden chains. “Run!” she shouted, struggling against the restraints. Eva was roped next, and she fell hard onto the floor as the chains bound her legs and arms tightly.
Robert, who was on a junior hockey team, and Lauren, who had taken figure skating lessons for years, didn’t need to think twice before pushing off from where they were standing, gliding quickly in the opposite direction from the cloud. They skated across the slippery floor like professionals.
“Get those little brats!” Diva commanded pointing.
At once, the wax guards lumbered after the children, but their path of attack moved them directly into the Golden cloud, and the spell Diva had created to capture the children wrapped Golden chains around their pliable limbs instead, toppling several of them to the floor.
“Ah! You idiots!” Diva huffed, crossing her arms. “You used up my wish.” The puff of Luck Diva had blown was, in fact, now gone, depleted by the guards who had run into it. “Great cleaners, but no brains…” she mumbled to herself, looking at her gown and arms which now revealed their original colors. “Such a pity... This Dust is gone so quickly.”
“Of course it’s gone quickly,” Reese said with disgust, hopping around in her chains. “It’s the magic of Luck – it’s not unlimited wishes! You are greedy and evil.”
Diva came closer, pointing a sharp nail at Reese’s nose. “And that is why I will have your baby teeth! The unlimited magic from your teeth will allow me to….” She paused and took a closer look at Reese’s ears. “Well, well…” she sneered. “I see we have a Leprechaun among us! What a treat!” She clapped her hands, delighted. “It’s always a special thrill when a Leprechaun gets caught up in its own device.”
“Luck isn’t a ‘device,’” Reese scowled. “And I hardly think I deserve to be called an ‘it.’ I do have feelings, you know.”
“Well, no matter,” Diva continued as if she hadn’t heard Reese. “I have plenty more Luck where that came from. And you, my dear, should learn not to push your Luck with that mouth of yours.” Diva brought up her hand and gently blew the last of the Luck from her shoes at Reese which pushed her off her feet and rolled her along the floor.
She laughed as Reese bumped and bumbled in her Golden chains. “Push your Luck! Push! Honestly, I am too clever,” she said, dabbing at her heavily made up eyes. Then she turned and called toward Lauren and Robert, “Where could you two possibly go?” Diva nearly hopped up and down with glee, watching them skate to the farthest corner of the room.
The guards stood numbly in front of the only doors. “There’s no other way out,�
�� she sung to them. “Do you see any windows? No, I didn’t think so. Now, be little darlings, won’t you, while I step upstairs for a just moment to get a little more Golden Luck? I promise I’ll be riiight back.” She held her skirt and walked carefully toward the door. “Yes… Right back to pull all those lovely baby teeth right out of your heads!”
Diva pointed at the nearest wax guard and said, “You there! Unchain your wax co-workers. And you! Watch this door!” She slammed the door behind her.
“We have to hurry,” Robert whispered, skating closer to Lauren. “She is not going to be happy when she discovers what’s happened to her pool.”
“What do you mean?” Lauren asked.
“Look,” Robert said pointing to the crack that had begun working its way down the side of a wall, “That’s a crack we started on the roof!”
“Oh, my…” Lauren gasped. “It’s all the way down here now? Do you know how tall this house is? It could break in half at any moment!”
Just then, they heard a faint screech bellowing all the way above them from the roof, “EEEAAAHH! HOW DARE YOU! I WILL DESTROY YOU ALL!”
“Wow, if we can hear Diva in this room, I think we have even bigger problems…” he winced. “We started the crack at the Luck pool. If it’s all the way down here, the pool must be drained completely by now.”
“Robert!” Reese shouted at him, “Maybe we could talk more about this later? Hurry up and use your Luck to free us!”
“All of it?” he whined. He glanced over at the wax guards but they seemed focused only on the last instructions given to them. Four stood firmly in front of the doors and one fixated on detangling the others from their chains.
“Robert!” Eva shouted. “Just use it and get us out of here!”
Lauren glided over to the struggling girls and pushed them toward each other so they could sit up. Robert closed his eyes for a moment and blew a mighty stream of Luck toward them, and when the Dust settled, their chains had dissolved into a droopy, sticky mass where it melted onto the ground. “Okay,” he cried to his friends, “Follow me!”