“Darius, I can’t stay here,” she mumbled almost incoherently now as the overwhelming desire to take a nap grew stronger.
“Just rest a little and when you feel up to it you can go back to your room, okay!” Darius replied watching her knowingly. She would be asleep in less than five minutes.
Her eyelids were feeling extremely heavy and she found herself leaning against Darius’ shoulder and he raised his arm to encircle her shoulders and watched her silently as she rested against him. He felt so warm, so solid and so good against her cheek. Maybe if she just closed her eyes for a few minutes she would pull herself together enough to get back to her room.
Candasee closed her eyes and kept saying to herself, just five minutes, and I’ll be fine, just five, she continued as her breathing became even and she fell asleep.
If anyone had dared to tell him even two hours ago that he would be sitting here with his wife in the circle of his arms again he would not have believed it. Once he knew she was coming to the hotel he’d cancelled his dinner plans in the restaurant and ordered room service so he could plan his schedule around the times she would be free during the intensive. Eloise had sent him a copy of her conference itinerary at his request. He didn’t want one moment to pass when he was not available to at least be with her during her free time on this island during the next eight days if he could help it.
He had never re-arranged his schedule like this before and he knew it was the mark of the changes that he’d been processing in himself and the way he wanted to relate to Candasee now and in the future. As her head slid down from his chest and onto his lap, he revelled in knowing how right this all felt. She was his missing puzzle piece, the love of his life. He touched her hair and allowed himself to remember how much he enjoyed running his fingers through this curtain of hair when he kissed her and how much he wanted to do that now.
No, he said steeling himself against the natural pull of his emotions toward her. He would not take anything from her that she did not freely offer him and based on all that she said when she entered this room, she was not offering him anything, and in fact, quite the opposite. Biting his lower lip he reluctantly eased himself from the chair, allowing her head to rest on the seat and went to retrieve a pillow and comforter from the bedroom of the adjoining suite. On second thought, leaving her on the sofa was not the best idea because based on her history she was down for the count. He would sleep on the sofa instead and allow her to have the bed.
Lifting her gently, and noting that she was indeed fast asleep, he carried her over to the bed and laid her gently down taking care not to wake her up. He removed her shoes and tucked her in. For several moments, he simply gazed at his ‘wife’ as she slept with her skin glowing under the gentle rays of the lamp across the bed on the side table, before he finally turned it off.
In his heart, she would always be his wife and even though he knew two years ago that signing those divorce papers would be the biggest mistake of his life, he did it anyway, because he wanted to save his pride! Damn his stupid pride now! Look at all it had cost him! He lost the trust and love of the only woman beside his own mother whose love mattered to him, whose opinion he sought and whose touch he craved. As far as he was concerned, Candasee Brogan was back in his life and before these eight days were up he swore to make sure that it was the last time she would ever consider herself a Maxwell again.
Chapter 4
Mmm what a delicious dream she was having! She was lying down on a massive four poster king-sized bed looking out of a full glass wall overlooking the Caribbean Sea, watching the first morning rays come over the horizon. Everything in the room shone with a golden glow and she stretched luxuriantly deeply inhaling the scent embedded in her pillows. This was a scent she had grown to love, that on more than one occasion had kept her in bed for hours at a time in the morning while she explored, tasted, touched and caressed! Darius was all over these sheets, over the blanket and all she wanted to do was to bury herself deeper in this bed and in this moment!
Suddenly, as if a light was switched on in Candasee’s mind she sat up with alarm.
Darius?
Bed?
The realization that she was not dreaming but actually waking up in Darius’ bed in the Derrien Hilton slammed into her consciousness with full force! She vaguely remembered seeing red after receiving the roses and barging into his private office and letting him have a piece of her mind!
The recollection now filled her with unspeakable embarrassment that the first words she could muster after an entire year were the ones she spat out last night after his efforts to make peace between them. All that it showed was that she was clearly still not over all that happened while he was still the clear thinking one. There were so many times she wished he would just show up on her doorstep in Barbados with flowers, with anything, and now that he finally did, she practically threw them back into his face. What was going on?
She sank back deep under the covers with a groan and squeezed her eyes tight to block out the image. A quick peek revealed that she was still fully dressed in the clothes she arrived in yesterday and she breathed a sigh of relief! More than anything else she just wanted to leave here unnoticed and return to her room and have a bath. Sliding out from under the covers she tiptoed across the bedroom not sure where Darius was and wanted to leave before he could see her escaping like this! And where on earth were her shoes?
As she stepped out of the bedroom her plans immediately evaporated because there he was, already sitting in a chair facing the bedroom wide awake and staring at her quite intently. He looked rough and slightly dangerous with his shoe clad feet spread wide apart and both his hands resting lightly on the arms of the chair like that. Did this man sleep at all?
“Good morning, did you sleep well?” he asked her simply.
She felt literally pinned to the wall with the surprise of seeing him sitting there so calmly, yet so powerfully in control of his domain.
“Yes, I did. I’m sorry for inconveniencing you! I don’t know what I was thinking last night. Don’t worry I am leaving now, sorry for the intrusion,” she said with those apologetic words rolling off her tongue lightning fast.
“You didn’t, so don’t worry about it. Listen, I hope you don’t mind, but I took the liberty of sending a bellboy for your suitcase so that you could change your clothes before you went downstairs this morning. You can use the shower or the hot tub in here, whichever you like and when you are done I ordered your favourite breakfast for you! I know how much you loved strawberry pancakes, bacon and gourmet coffee. This is just my way of apologizing for upsetting you last night. If it is too much I will just ask to have your things transferred back to your room again.”
Even from across the room, Candasee noted how he clenched and unclenched his hands on the arm of the chair in the way he did when he was uncertain about something! It was one of the few emotional giveaways he had which she noticed about him over the years. What others thought of as a show of power on his part and nonchalance was actually as sign to his sense of vulnerability. What did he have to be nervous about? If anything, she was the one that should be apologizing for how she acted last night.
“Darius thanks, you didn’t have to go to so much trouble for me. I was on my way back to my room anyway.”
“I didn’t want anyone you knew to see you walking the halls so early in the morning still in the clothing you wore yesterday. I was only thinking of your reputation!” he replied still slowly clenching and unclenching his hands on the arms of the chair.
This was one of the reasons she had such difficulty divorcing this man! He did the most thoughtful things sometimes and then at others he was such a total jerk!
He continued, “I left it in the inner powder room area of the bathroom so you could have full privacy. I can also leave for a while if that would make you more comfortable,” he said as he slid forward on the chair preparing to stand. What did privacy mean from someone who had already seen, touched and tasted every
millimetre of her body, she mused silently.
He was already freshly dressed in a clean deep blue shirt and black slacks that made the grey of his eyes look so much more appealing. His dark brown hair was still slightly wet from his shower and curled invitingly on his head. He was what one would describe as being biracial, having a white Scottish father and a black mother. His light brown skin tone favoured his father’s side of the family while he inherited his nose and thick lips from his mother’s African side. A towering six foot two to her medium frame he always made her feel so secure, protected and very aroused whenever he stood near to her. Maybe that is why her anger dissolved so quickly last night! Coming up here was a colossal mistake and the faster she could get out and get back to her room and forget that any of this ever happened, the better it would be for all of them. She could not let him know that she still carried a blazing torch of feeling for him. It was too embarrassing to think about.
Still feeling apprehensive about accepting his honourable gesture, Candasee again considered leaving the suite. Checking the time by the clock on the wall, she saw that it was just after seven thirty and by now Nathan would probably have come looking for her to go for the early morning jog they spoke about in the elevator last night.
Nathan! Oh no! He was the last person she wanted to explain her state of dress to and where she was returning from. He would never understand that it was not what it looked like! When she did not answer her door, she hoped Nathan would assume that she was sleeping in late and leave her be.
She could see Darius examining her expression closely and waiting patiently for her response. Thinking quickly, she decided that Darius’ suggestion would be best considering her limited options.
“Okay Darius, I will change here, but only if you leave. I should be done in about twenty minutes,” she replied finally.
At her positive response Darius smiled exposing a straight row of white teeth but he stopped himself suddenly with some effort as though he realized she’d noticed his immediate, jubilant reaction. Clearing his throat from some imaginary blockage he was soon walking out through the door promising to be back in twenty minutes for breakfast saying that there was something that he needed to discuss with her.
She had no intention of staying that long though! This whole scene was already too intimate for her. She had a boyfriend now for crying out loud, an exclusive relationship with a man who actually loved her! She would take a quick shower and change and try to be gone in ten minutes, eleven if she was late. Seeing Darius like this was unexpected! Gone were the judgemental and angry expressions with which he regarded her in the past. He actually seemed happy to see her and she did not know why that thought alone unnerved the heck out of her. So the faster she could get out of there, the better.
As Darius put some distance between himself and his room, he felt some lightness enter into his steps. As much as he would have liked nothing more than to reacquaint himself intimately with his wife in the shower, he knew that he needed to regain her trust first and if that meant leaving his own suite for twenty minutes then so be it. He was not a big fan of large breakfasts, preferring to drink coffee and perhaps eat a Danish roll on some occasions, but this morning he was looking forward at least to sharing a meal with Candasee again. This would be a wonderful beginning to these eight days.
He took his private elevator downstairs and decided to take a stroll around the property to see what was going on as the staff worked on the preparations for two events the hotel was hosting. Occupancy was high at this time of the year and the hotel would be almost full for the next few months.
Already several guests were swimming in the pool and a group had spread out yoga mats and were doing some stretches on the pool deck. Darius assumed that they were part of the arts intensive because most tourists to the hotel slept in late and were hardly interested in exercising. If they did, they tended to concentrate their activities to the state of the art gym where it was cool and air-conditioned.
Leaning against a hut that sold locally-made souvenirs, he watched the yoga group, allowing his mind began to drift back to the times he would see Candasee stretching and dancing at their home in the past. She always looked so beautiful and so graceful when she moved and it always bewildered him then why that always stirred so much darkness and anger in him simultaneously. She was an excellent dancer but he held a secret in his heart that he’d never shared with her about why he wanted her as far away from dance or any kind of career in the arts. She had even invited him to see a few of her public performances with her dance troupe, but he never attended any of them, preferring to schedule a conflicting meeting so he had the perfect cover.
He had foolishly thought that if he could express enough displeasure and disapproval about her career choice that it would somehow cause her to rethink leaving her work as an attorney. He tried every angle, the money angle, the loss of social standing, and the accusations that she simply wanted to parade her body on stage in the full view of other men but none of them worked. The more they fought about it, the more agitated and frustrated they both became and finally she decided that she did not want him or their marriage anymore.
The very thing he feared happening to him still did, even though he tried to stop it! He knew she would probably have reconsidered her stance if he had shown some regret but his pride got in the way. He was a powerful business man that influenced the way people spent their money, the way they thought and invested and yet he had no power over his own headstrong wife. That rubbed at him until he was raw and somehow he convinced himself not to let go of his stance!
It was the biggest mistake of his life, because beneath all of those raw emotions and the pride that he held up like a façade was the truth that he loved her desperately and never wanted to live his life without her.
The months following their divorce saw him become even more of a workaholic than he’d ever been before, just to put her out of his mind. Of course it never worked and his ridiculous work schedule saw him spending more time here at the hotel or travelling than at their home. In fact, he had not gone back to the house in Willercrest Heights once in the last three months, preferring instead the convenience of his office suite. Too many memories haunted him there, memories that that he just could not deal with at the time.
The divorce was his fault.
He was the one who pushed her away by trying to control her decisions. He was the reason why he’d lost the privilege of waking up beside Candasee every morning and being the recipient of her love.
As he glanced impatiently at the watch on his wrist to see the progress of the time and to determine whether he should return to the suite, he overheard a man asking around to some of the persons stretching,
“Has anyone seen or heard from Candasee this morning?”
This immediately piqued Darius’ interest as he studied the concerned expression on the other man’s face!
Someone in the yoga group replied no and the man made a 360 degree turn looking all around to see if he could somehow spot her. Partially concealed by the standing sign outside the hut he was able to observe the man without attracting his attention. One of the male members in the group walked up to where he was standing and grabbed his bottle of water from the wall surrounding a low garden with low growing bromeliads.
“What’s up Nathan, are you all set for the sessions later? You look worried about something,” the man asked after taking a long swallow.
“I’m fine and so are the plans for the intensive. I just need to meet with the events coordinator again this morning but for now it seems that the transition should be smooth. All of the delegates arrived last night safely despite the weather as well.” Nathan replied. “Look, I just need to find Candasee! We planned to meet this morning and I can’t seem to find her anywhere,” he exclaimed anxiously.
“Hey you two seem to be getting pretty close?” the man with bottle asked in a teasing tone.
The man paused and smiled before continuing, “Well yeah, we ar
e! She’s finally agreed for us to be exclusive”.
“That’s great, congratulations! It is good to see you happy like this considering what happened with Asania. I can tell that Candasee is nothing like her and she really likes you too! Listen she’s probably just too tired and decided to sleep in a bit later than usual,” replied the man with the water bottle.
“Hmm! Well she was pretty exhausted when we arrived last night,” replied Nathan thoughtfully. “Perhaps you are right! I will go down to the beach one more time to look for her there before going back to her room. I will see you at the meeting in about two hours and Dave, if you do see her tell her I’m looking for her,” said Nathan as he walked off in the direction of the beach.
So Candasee was seeing this man Nathan exclusively, noted Darius to himself. The thought of Candasee being involved with and marrying someone was less preferable to him than choosing to swim a marathon in the Arctic Sea. This was something he did not want to consider at all, after all, she was still his wife. Twisting his lips, Darius knew his thoughts were pure fantasy and pure arrogance on his part to assume that someone as beautiful as Candasee would not capture the attention of a hundred someone else’s by now. What was he thinking; after all they were divorced for two years now. It was not as though he did not go out on a few dates himself since they’d separated, right?
That little pep talk did nothing to calm him at all. From the time he’d heard the word, ‘exclusive’ leave that man’s mouth he knew another dimension of complexity had been added to his plans to woo Candasee over the next eight days.
From the looks of it her partner Nathan was about the same height as he was, six foot two and was extremely fit, judging by his lithe and muscular frame. He was definitely handsome in his own right.
The word exclusive did not mean married and as far as he was concerned that meant she was still available until she proved it otherwise. From the heated moment they shared briefly last night, there was still something there for both of them. He was suddenly glad that he took this stroll downstairs because now he knew that he would need to take a more direct route to capturing Candasee’s attention. He had no idea how she felt about this Nathan character and if she had fallen in love with him. So to avoid offending her again he would have to be definitely more creative in his approach as well.
Hidden Love (Derrien Island Trilogy) Page 6