Melissa responded blindly to Dominic's kiss, the touch of his lips on hers plunging her once again into the relentless whirlpool of physical desire. He was not quite as gentle with her this time, his movements hurried, as if he were driven by a strange urgency, but she didn't care, her own newly awakened desires rising up swiftly to meet his, and for the second time she discovered the magic to be found in a lover's arms.
But when it was over, when their heartbeats had stilled once more and the passion that clouded rational thought ebbed, Melissa returned unpleasantly to her present predicament. Her cheek resting against the gentle rise and fall of Dominic's warm chest, she was miserably conscious that nothing had changed. He still didn't love her; he still hadn't wanted to marry her, and she didn't know if she could bear to have him come to her bed, aware that it was not love but mere, common lust that brought him there.
To her horror, she felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes and for an awful moment she was afraid she was going to burst into sobs. Biting her lip, she blinked several times, berating herself for being a fool and for allowing herself to be beguiled by his undoubted charm. There was no use pretending to herself after tonight that she would ever be able to deny him anything. Her sweet mouth twisted. Certainly she wouldn't be able to deny him her bed-all he had to do was touch her, and her bones turned to milk pudding, she thought disgustedly. But if she was willing to admit that Dominic utterly fascinated her, she wasn't about to let him know her feelings-then all would be lost.
Tears gone, she lay there for several seconds, her thoughts busy with ways to hide the silly yearning of her wayward heart. It wouldn't do to sigh and beg for the moon. She would have to act as careless and indifferent around him as she could. Not for her languishing looks and soulful eyes! So she had lost this first skirmish between them; that didn't mean that she should simply surrender and turn into a meek, biddable mouse of a wife, did it?
A sparkle in her amber-gold eyes, she began to formulate plans to make it abundantly clear to her new husband that, while he might command her body, he had not conquered either her heart or her spirit! If he wanted a mewling, clinging vine, he should have continued his pursuit of the fair Deborah, she thought tartly. But she was aware of an odd constriction in the region of her heart at the thought of Dominic with Deborah, and she sighed faintly, suddenly depressed about the future.
Dominic heard the soft sound she made, and remembering her virgin state and concerned that he might have hurt her this last time, he brushed a kiss across her forehead and inquired quietly, "Shall I leave you? I did not mean to act in the manner of a rutting boar-I hope I did not hurt you."
Still very shy with him, she shook her head, not able to look at him. But it seemed that Dominic suffered from no such niceties, and before she could protest, he had shifted their positions until she lay flat on the bed and he was propped up on one elbow, lounging there beside her and gazing down at her wary features.
A thread of laughter in his voice, he murmured, "What did that shake mean-no, you don't want me to leave? Or no, I didn't hurt you?"
Staring up at him in the flickering light of the candle, Melissa wished vehemently that he didn't look quite so appealing with his curly black hair ruffled from her caressing fingers and his gray eyes full of lazy amusement. There was a frankly satisfied smile curving his mobile mouth, and that more than anything strengthened her resolve not to let him know precisely how very attractive she found him.
Pretending an indifference she did not feel, she smiled carelessly at him and shrugged. Not meeting his eyes, she replied lightly, "Take it to mean whatever you like-it really doesn't matter to me."
That wasn't what he wanted to hear, and her infuriatingly cool smile made him a trifle annoyed. He had hoped that she would want him to stay with her, and even in spite of her less-than-inviting attitude, he found himself reluctant to move away from her seductively warm body, much less her bed. With an edge to his voice, he muttered, "Then I'll take it to mean no ... to both questions."
Hoping he would not guess at the effort it cost her, she shrugged again and yawned delicately. "Whatever you wish. I for one am quite fatigued and would like to sleep now." She opened her eyes wide and said innocently, "Since I have proved myself to be a dutiful wife and endured your demands, I do think that I should be allowed to sleep alone in my own bed ... don't you?"
Chapter Fifteen
"BY GOD, I sure as hell don't!" Dominic burst out furiously, all signs of lazy amusement gone. An angry glitter in the gray eyes, he jerked upright and in one lithe motion leaped from the bed. Snatching up his robe from the floor where he had thrown it in what seemed only moments before, he glared at Melissa. "Endured! " he snarled, wounded pride battling with the strong inclination to grab her into his arms and kiss her mindless. How dare she act this way! He had given her pleasure, he knew he had, and now the brazen little baggage was trying to pretend that it had meant nothing to her!
He stood there glaring at her for a long moment while he considered climbing back into her bed and proving to her that enduring was not quite what she had done during their lovemaking. But there was an uncomfortable niggle at the back of his brain that questioned his assumption that she had enjoyed what they had just shared.... Perhaps, he thought with a sudden sinking feeling in his midsection, she really had simply endured; that, her actions to the contrary, she truly found his touch repulsive and had merely suffered his presence.
It was, for Dominic, one of the most painful moments of his life, and if Melissa could have guessed the hurt she was inflicting by her facade of indifference, she would never have been able to carry it out. As it was, she met his look squarely, and continuing with the role she had selected, she replied with a remarkable amount of composure, considering the tumultuous beat of her heart, "Yes, endured!"
Jaw taut, Dominic said acidly, "Very well, madam wife, you have made yourself abundantly clear-I will not inflict my company on you any longer-and rest assured that while you find my lovemaking distasteful, there are many women who don't!" His gaze raked her naked body. "And although your charms are delightful, I'm sure that I shall find others who are just as pleasurable! Good night, dear wife!"
Her topaz-colored eyes appearing huge in her pale face, she watched as he stalked from the room, the urge to call him back very strong, the desire to retrieve every word she had spoken almost overpowering. In trying to protect herself, had she made a mistake? Had that been a flicker of pain she had glimpsed in the depths of those usually laughing gray eyes?
Miserably she stared at the door that Dominic had slammed behind him. To add to her feeling of guilt and unhappiness, the memory of all the kind things that he had done for her since she had first known him came rushing back. Oh, my wretched, wretched tongue! she thought forlornly, wishing that there were some miraculous way to call back the last few minutes.
Unfortunately, Melissa's abject state didn't last very long. Though she remembered the kind things that Dominic had done for her and Zachary, she also remembered Josh's early comments about Dominic and the ugly content of Latimer's letter. Reminding herself that he had made it very apparent that he'd had no desire to marry her and had done so only out of a sense of honor helped to lessen some of the guilt she was experiencing. After all, she mused slowly, she hadn't said anything vicious and she had warned him that she didn't want to consummate their marriage, so he shouldn't have been surprised at her actions. And since he obviously didn't feel any deep emotion for her, it shouldn't have bothered him very much that his lovemaking apparently left her unmoved....
She wasn't exactly comfortable with her line of thought, but it did give her some solace and it did dilute her awful feeling of having wounded Dominic's sensibilities. But it didn't explain away her growing uneasiness that she had made a terrible miscalculation and that she was going to pay a dear price for tonight's works. With a lowering spirit she recalled his final words to her about finding other women who didn't find his lovemaking distasteful.
A
ngry with herself for even caring that he might seek the charms of other women, Melissa sat up in bed, pulling her knees up to rest her chin on them. Wrapping her arms around her legs, she stared blankly at the door from which Dominic had departed so abruptly such a short time ago. It didn't really matter, she told herself for perhaps the tenth time. This was a marriage of convenience-they both knew that! There was no love between them; they would probably live separate lives, each one busy with his or her own pursuits. Melissa grimaced. Somehow that wasn't how she had expected her marriage to be; it was precisely to shun such an empty life that she had refused to marry in the first place.
A bitter laugh escaped her. It was ironic that after all the machinations she had gone through over the years to avoid being forced into a loveless marriage, she should find herself in just that position. Conscious of the tiny ache in the region of her heart, she felt a tear trickle slowly down her cheek.
She wished she knew what Dominic was thinking; wished she had some inclination of his feelings for her. She knew he desired her, or had desired her, she thought with an unhappy twist of her mouth, and she knew that he had been both generous and indulgent with her during the brief time they had known each other. But just because he had been generous and indulgent didn't imply that she meant any more to him than .., than his horses! He was a wealthy man, he could afford to be generous, and as for indulgence-sometimes indulgence merely masked indifference!
A militant sparkle appeared in the golden-brown eyes. She was not going to brood over tonight! She would be very polite and very proper with her husband, but she was not going to allow herself to be hoodwinked by his spurious charms! Hadn't Latimer written in his letter that Dominic had been seeing Deborah only days before the wedding? And hadn't dear Uncle Josh warned her repeatedly that Dominic was a bounder, a womanizer of the worst kind? Oh, no, she wasn't about to allow her foolish heart to be captured by such an unworthy creature!
Giving her tawny head a defiant toss, she decided that she had not been wrong to act as she had tonight. Her husband was already too arrogant, too confident of his own worth and handsomeness, and it was just as well, she told herself staunchly, if she had punctured his pride a little. Certainly it would never do to let him have a hint of the sweet turmoil he created so effortlessly in her breast by a mere look, a touch, a smile. ...
Melissa took a deep breath. She wouldn't think about that! She concentrated instead on what she had gained. The worst hurdle was over; she had made her position clear, and it was time that she stopped yearning for something she couldn't have and set about finding some even ground on which to base their marriage. Having convinced herself of the soundness of her reasoning, she lay back down and prepared to sleep.
But sleep came hard; the memory of Dominic's ardent lovemaking causing her body to ache for his touch; the memory of the expression in his eyes just before he had turned away from her making her doubt the wisdom of the stance she had taken. It wasn't at all surprising that she awoke depressed and unrefreshed at the first light of dawn, her thoughts going instantly to her husband, all the uncertainties she had assumed she had resolved within herself rushing to the forefront of her mind.
At least Melissa had been able to sleep, even if only for a little bit, but such had not been the case for her very new and very angry husband. Dominic had spent the hours since he had stormed from her bedroom alternately cursing her and yearning to creep back into her bed and press her sweetly perfumed flesh next to his, to know again the intoxicating wonder of making love to his wife.
It was, to say the least, one of the most unsettling nights of his life. Everything he had ever wanted had come to him easily. His charm, his handsome face and form, his powerfully connected family and his fortune had made few things beyond his grasp, and now to discover that a woman he found wholly enchanting, if exasperating, was completely indifferent to him was a devastating blow.
Over and over again, he reviewed those moments in Melissa's bed, remembering her every reaction to his touch, trying desperately to prove to himself that she had lied to him, that she had not been unmoved by his caresses. She must be lying, he muttered to himself furiously. Lying through those honey-sweet lips of hers. The problem with that particular line of thought was that he could think of no reason, other than sheer perversity, for her to do so! And while he wouldn't discount just such a reason for her actions, he finally decided gloomily that she must have meant every word she had hurled at him.
But he could not accept that notion, telling himself repeatedly that her responses to him had been too eager, too natural and uninhibited to have been calculated. Though he tried to convince himself of the soundness of his reasoning, he found little comfort in his musings.
Leaving Melissa's room, he had dragged on a shirt and a pair of breeches, and finding a pair of boots in his own room, had hastily put them on before departing from there. Downstairs and outside on the surprisingly spacious gallery of the cottage, he had paced back and forth, oblivious to the warm, magnolia-scented air that wafted gently around him.
What a devilish tangle! he thought viciously. Married to one of the most infuriating yet utterly beguiling women he had ever met in his life, and she was, or claimed to be, totally indifferent to him! His pride was stung and his faith in his own physical prowess was thoroughly shaken. His expression grim, he continued to stalk back and forth along the gallery, trying to make sense of what had happened tonight, and why-since he was positive she wielded no power over his heart-Melissa's rejection of him should matter so very much.
It wasn't as if he hadn't had his advances rebuffed before; granted they had been few and far between, but there had been those rare women in his life who had spurned the lures that he had thrown out to catch their attention. It had never disturbed him in the least-he had simply shrugged his broad shoulders and gone on to find another who caught his fancy. Except for his brief and mad involvement with Deborah, he had never given those in stances much thought, no one woman ever touching his finer emotions . . . until he had laid eyes on the aggravating, enraging and wholly enchanting Miss Melissa Seymour!
His ambulations had brought him to one end of the gallery where a few chairs and a small, square table were situated. Conveniently there was a slim case filled with the thin black cheroots that he smoked upon occasion, and idly he selected one. Lighting it, he began his restless pacing once more, a tobacco-scented cloud of blue smoke following him about the gallery.
While Dominic was willing to admit to several things, such as his seeming inability to deal rationally with the amber-eyed, tawny-haired witch who was no doubt sleeping dreamlessly in her bed upstairs, he was not about to admit to himself or anybody else that he had fallen-into the same trap that had snared his brother Morgan. He would not, he swore with his teeth clamped tightly around the black cigar, fall in love with Melissa. He would not allow himself to become so besotted with any female that his life revolved around her and that there was an emptiness without her at his side. And he was most definitely not in love with the infuriating little baggage he had just married this afternoon!
Having convinced himself that he was utterly untouched by Melissa's advent into his hitherto well-ordered existence, he proceeded to find perfectly logical reasons for his incomprehensible actions these past few months. His physical response to her, he was positive, was simply because he had been a long time without a woman and she was desirable-why, he'd wager that he would have responded to any personable young woman! As for offering that ridiculous sum of money for half a horse, well, that was easily explained too-it had been merely an act of kindness; the Seymours had been in desperate straits and he'd seen a way to help them. That philanthropy had never before figured high on his list of pleasures, he resolutely ignored; besides, in addition to helping them, there had been the wicked enjoyment of being fairly confident that he was also thwarting Latimer. But it didn't really matter why he'd done it-the money was a paltry sum to him anyway, and if he wished to throw it away, it was no one's busi
ness but his own. The marriage itself was not so remarkable to understand-marrying her had been the only honorable thing he could have done considering the circumstances. Stubbornly he closed his mind to the sure knowledge that had it been a female other than Melissa he'd found in his room that night at the inn, he would not have been willing to offer himself as hostage for honor.
Satisfied that he had explained his seemingly eccentric behavior of late, Dominic was in a much better frame of mind and leisurely he filled his lungs with the rich smoke of his slim cheroot. But as his thoughts drifted irresistibly back to tonight's debacle, his hard-won satisfaction fled and a black scowl darkened his fine brow.
Usually, Dominic was able to see the humor in most situations, but he was finding it devilish hard to see anything amusing about being found wanting by one's wife. He was not an overly vain man, although he did have a good opinion of himself, but he found it impossible to believe that Melissa had been as indifferent as she claimed. He'd made love to too many women not to know when he had- also given them satisfaction, and he discovered that he was deeply affronted by the notion that he was such an inept lover that he could not bring pleasure to his own wife! Time and again he relived those sweet moments of passion that he had shared with her, and to his utmost disgust, his body would instantly harden, the desire to seek her out and prove her words lies nearly overpowering.
Midnight Masqerade Page 23