The Glasshouse (Lavender Shores Book 6)

by Rosalind Abel

  As I’d been walking back from the Grapevine with a bottle of wine for Mabel and Sapphire, Adrian’s face popping up on my cell as he called was a beam of light shining down from heaven, instantly answering all the questions that had haunted me since the wedding. It all made sense now. I wasn’t exactly sure what steps were next, or what things would look like, but everything up to this point had led me to that moment. To the passion in the glasshouse the day before and then Adrian calling. It was written in the stars, or the cards, or the lines that crisscrossed my palms.

  I texted Jasper and told him I’d meet him at Mabel and Sapphire’s, that I was going to be a little late, and to give my apologies.

  And with Adrian’s beautifully chiseled face in my hands and his full lips on mine, it was just one more confirmation. Everything that came before had needed to happen, so we could find each other. Sure, there were a billion unclear details and even more things we didn’t know about each other, but that was all insignificant fluff. That was the point, wasn’t it? All those would be revealed in time.

  As we kissed, Adrian’s hands moved up my back, one of them crossing my neck as he slipped his fingers into my hair and pulled me to him to deepen the kiss.

  I stepped into him, pressing the lengths of our bodies together, feeling the hard muscle burning against my own and the thick evidence of his desire against my thigh.

  Adrian’s lips parted in a breath, allowing me entrance. He groaned as my tongue met his and I locked my arms around him, crushing him to me.

  I got lost in the feel of his body, and the comfort of his presence—the awareness of how much he wanted me.

  As it had in the field the day before, Adrian’s kiss washed everything away, leaving nothing but a pleasant buzz and fire in my brain. Replacing all the confusion and chaos with one simple fact—we were both here in that moment. Absolutely nothing else mattered.

  I didn’t want it to end. Ever.

  As I continued exploring the taste of him, I was suddenly aware of Adrian’s hand jammed between us, his palm pressing against the length of my erection and then squeezing it through the denim.

  I broke the kiss and let my head fall back as I gasped and thrust against his hand.

  “I’ve been thinking about this cock since yesterday. About all of you.” Adrian’s breath was hot on my neck, and he shifted his other hand between us and began to fumble with my belt. “I know you don’t have much time, but just let me taste you.”

  Yes. Yes. I wanted nothing more than to feel Adrian’s lips on me. Have him take me deep again. Feel the tightness of his throat as it milked my cock. Then have him inside, like I couldn’t the day before. Have him fill me, ride him until his whole body trembled, until he was unable to form words from his cries of pleasure.

  Adrian went to his knees as he got my belt free and began working the button of my jeans. His breath was already ragged in anticipation.

  This was exactly what I wanted. For it to go on, and on, and on.

  The thought made me freeze, and brought with it a sense of loss, followed by a stab of pain. I stumbled back, pulling free from Adrian’s grip that had already gotten my jeans unzipped.

  He looked up at me, confused, startled. “Sorry, did I hurt you?”

  I shook my head, both trying to assure him and get my thoughts together, understand my reaction.

  After hesitating for a moment, Adrian stood but didn’t attempt to come closer. “Sorry. I’m pushing. I thought….” He sighed, and this one was so different than his other. “It doesn’t matter what I thought. I’m sorry. This is too much, isn’t it? I shouldn’t have called, shouldn’t do any of this. I know you and Will have things to figure out. I guess….” His shoulders slumped. “Sorry.”

  Will.

  Something clicked, bringing with it understanding and just a bit of dread. Will. Of course. I did want this to go on and on with Adrian. I wanted to experience what we had in the glasshouse the day before countless times and in countless different ways. Wanted that numbing buzz in my brain every time I kissed him.

  I moved back to Adrian, and though I wondered if I should, I took his hand and tried to pour as much meaning as I could into my gaze when our eyes met. “Don’t be sorry. I want this.” I couldn’t hold back an unattractive snort. “Believe me. You have no idea how much I want this. But you’re not wrong. I need to handle things with Will.”

  “Of course you do. That’s only right.” His words were suddenly bright, they seemed forced and like they cost him. “I’m not trying to get in the way of your relationship with Will. I thought maybe…. Well, it doesn’t matter what I thought. Sorry.”

  “No, you don’t understand.” He had turned away, and I squeezed his hand, causing him to look back. “I’ve been trying to get ahold of Will endlessly since the wedding. I don’t know where he is. Although I bet he’s in England. Even if he is, he has coverage there, but I’ve also been sending emails. He’s simply not answering. I left him a new message last night, after… well, after…. Told him we really needed to talk about everything.” Again, it seemed as if Adrian was getting ready to give some apology or try to get away—like hearing this was painful for him. Clearly, he didn’t understand, not that I could blame him. “I’ll call him tonight again. After dinner with Mabel and Sapphire. If he doesn’t answer then, I’ll explain things over voicemail, and shoot him an email as well. It’s not how I want to end things, but he’s not giving me much of a choice.”

  Adrian flinched. “End things?”

  “Yeah. It’s time.”

  “No. I don’t want to be the reason you two break up. I didn’t mean to….” He started to shake his head, then paused, his brows furrowing as he stared into my eyes. “So, what do you want? You want to end things with Will? You don’t still want to get married?”

  “I’m pretty sure that was implied by me running down the aisle and making an idiot out of myself.” I forced a smile of my own. I was saying that as much to myself as to him. I wouldn’t have made such a statement a couple of days ago. I still hadn’t figured out why I’d run. Why I had been physically incapable of going through with it. That all changed when I’d been with Adrian the day before. It suddenly made sense. “I’ve done my best to get in contact with him, and I want us to start out on the right foot, and to do that, I need to end things with him officially. Even if it’s only through voicemail.”

  I couldn’t identify all the emotions that flitted over Adrian’s face. I thought I caught some panic, but also some excitement. Possibly some joy or happiness? “You want us to start out on the right foot? As in… start out? Together?”

  I had a flare of panic of my own, wondering if I’d said too much, but I was pretty certain I’d heard hope in those words, unless that’s just what I wanted to be there. “Yeah. You and me. If that’s okay with you.”

  He let out a shaky breath and laughed nervously. His gaze flitted to a stack of books on the dining room table before he looked back at me. “Yeah. That’s more than okay with me.”

  Dinner with Mabel and Sapphire was a mix of comfort and a blur. I struggled to focus on being present. Luckily, Jasper was able to manage most of the conversation.

  The women really were reminiscent of our mother. Each had one of her core characteristics. Mom, though having limited resources, was an amazing cook like Mabel, and she was passionate about flowers and plants like Sapphire. Between the two of them, there were moments I felt like Mom was nearby.

  I hadn’t realized I’d been glancing at my phone every few minutes, anticipating a message from Adrian or call from Will, until Jasper cast me a reprimanding glare. I turned it off. The only person who had called was Angela. And I was certain she was just checking in, probably seeing if I’d warmed to the idea of being on another reality series since the day before.

  Even with my phone off, when I wasn’t preoccupied thinking of Adrian or trying to plan out what I would say to Will, during our time with Mabel and Sapphire, I was struggling with not telling them everythin
g. As if they really were my mom. Not that I’d ever told Mom anything about my romances. She died before that phase of my life had begun. She’d left us long before that infamous sex tape outed me to the rest of the world. Though, looking back, I was absolutely certain she was aware of Jasper’s sexuality. I also figured she’d been aware of mine too. If I was right, that aspect had only remained a secret from my father.

  As we drove home from Mabel and Sapphire’s house, Jasper swiveled in the passenger seat. “Okay, what’s going on? You were completely distracted and out of it tonight.” He patted my arm and then rushed ahead. “Not that it isn’t understandable. It’s how you’ve been the whole week since the wedding; it’s how anyone would be. Mabel and Sapphire understand that, and I’m sure that’s what they thought was going on. But I know you better. There’s a different feel to it. I don’t know what it is. But something has changed.”

  I wasn’t sure how Jasper would react. Both because, as he said, it had only been a week since the wedding, and because Adrian was his friend—but no matter his response, after I told Will, Jasper would be the next to know. But I needed to get the other conversation out of the way first, even if it was only a voicemail.

  I licked my lips and spared him a glance, but then looked back at the road, using it more as an excuse to avoid eye contact than actually being worried about oncoming traffic. “You’re right. There has been a change. But I’m not quite ready to talk about it. But it’s a good thing.”

  Jasper stilled, made a sound like he was about to speak, then didn’t. He drummed his fingers on his leg for a few moments, then sucked in a breath and finally spoke. “Please tell me there’s not another guy.”

  Though his words had the sound of an apology in the way he spoke, they hurt, and I glanced over again. “What?”

  “I’m not saying there is. And I’m not trying to judge whatever you’re doing like I know what’s best, but…. Whatever’s going on, I hope it’s good. I hope it’s wonderful….” Another breath. “But I hope it’s not another man.”

  It sounded as though he already knew it was.

  Jasper never told me what to do, never acted like he was in charge. Of course, I never did that with him, either. His reaction was new and uncharted territory. I wasn’t sure what to do with it.

  “It’s a good thing, Jasper.” That time I didn’t look over at him. “It’s going to be a very, very good thing.”

  Thankfully there were only a few blocks before we parked and headed into the apartment, as the silence was heavy with unspoken words. Clearly, Jasper was doing everything he could to keep from launching into a lecture, however atypical for him that might be. And I was attempting to hold my temper in check. Not that I have much of one, and it was never directed at Jasper, yet I couldn’t help being angry that he was spoiling the beautiful feelings I was having for Adrian. Making me think that one of the obstacles Adrian and I might have starting out together would be my own brother.

  After an awkward exchange of good nights, we both disappeared into our rooms. I knew I should take some time to get my emotions under control before I called Will, but even more than before, I needed to get it done. However it played out.

  Though it had only been a couple of hours, when I powered my phone back on, I was nearly overwhelmed with notifications and missed calls. Every social media app seemed like it had hundreds of things demanding my attention. There were three missed calls from Angela, and she’d left two messages.

  And a voicemail from Will.

  I stared at the phone in utter disbelief. It had been almost a week of endless calls and messages from me with no response. I could barely believe his name was really there. Of course he’d call when I had my phone off. Just my luck. Who knew how many times I’d have to call him back before he actually answered.

  I didn’t bother listening to the voicemail; I just called him back.

  The phone rang once before Will’s voice filled my ear. “I can’t believe you’re calling, Harrison. Was I not clear enough on the message? Don’t try to apologize. Don’t try to get back together. We are done. Fucking done.”

  The fury in his voice startled me, and it cut deep enough to take my breath away. Maybe I’d been a fool to expect anything else. I had expected anger, but not that sound. I’d never heard Will sound like that. Although watching your fiancé run from you down the aisle in front of the entire world probably would change a man. But still.

  “Seriously? You’re not even going to speak? After all the fucking messages and voicemails you left me, and now this? Then you call and can’t even fucking say anything?”

  It was his cursing that helped me find my voice. It didn’t feel like I was talking to Will. He rarely swore, and never sounded like he was ready to kill someone. “I am sorry, Will. I am. I wasn’t planning on running. Hadn’t entered my mind. I just got up there and suddenly knew…. Well, no I didn’t know anything. I just was overcome with—”

  His vicious laughter cut me off. “You think I want an explanation for our fucking wedding? For that lovely humiliation? You’re such a fake piece of shit, Harrison Getty.”

  At his words, I actually stumbled back several paces until I bumped against the wall. This couldn’t be Will. It couldn’t be. He was never mean, never cruel. Never one to call names. I wanted to hang up, throw the phone across the room, get away from him. From the horrible thought that I’d turned my sweet Will into someone cruel. But I couldn’t. The phone was frozen against my ear.

  “By the end of it, you had me feeling like I was the one making you do the show. Like I might be ruining our lives by waiting for a goddamn honeymoon. Just a few months waiting for a honeymoon, Harrison, and you seemed like I was breaking your fucking heart.” There was such hatred in his voice I could barely understand his words. “I was going to surprise you. I couldn’t go through with it, couldn’t make you look that unhappy. I rebooked our tickets to Paris. We were going to fly out the day after our wedding. I was going to tell you we didn’t need to do any more shows. That it could just be you and me. No more camera crew because you were making it seem like the biggest torture in the fucking world.”

  He was? Being filmed every moment of our lives had been about to end?

  “You had me convinced, you motherfucking piece of fake shit.” And still he wasn’t done. “Had me feeling like the biggest asshole in the world. But it was you craving it all along. The minute that fucking video of you running away stopped trending, you release another fucking sex tape? A sex tape, Harrison? Really? As if seeing you with another man didn’t hurt enough; it was nothing to the realization that I’ve been a fucking moron from the very beginning. I was completely fooled by you. How devastated you were when you were outed by that other sex tape. All the drama it caused between you and your bitch of a father. Poor, poor Harrison. And I bought it all. I was the fucking child that fell for it. Was any minute of it real for you? Any part of us? Not that it matters.”

  He didn’t pause, offered no chance for me to interject, not that I could’ve.

  “Clearly, I have no idea who the fuck you are, so what does it matter if you even loved me for a moment? You used that fucking story of the sex tape, talking about how things were with your dad after that, used all of it to manipulate me. Used some fucked-up victim mentality to cause me to fall in love with you. To want to protect you.” What had been quiet violence in his tone exploded into an eardrum-shattering scream. “Fuck you, Harrison. I hope you get exactly what you deserve. Fuck you!”

  I don’t know when it happened, but at some point during the onslaught I’d sunk to the floor and started to sob. My body hurt more than it ever had from any tackle on the football field, more than when I shattered my knee. I couldn’t find my breath, couldn’t stop sobbing, couldn’t stop shaking. I didn’t even hang up the phone. Somewhere in there I realized Will was gone, and I simply let the phone fall to the floor, then wrapped my arms around my knees, and pulled them to my chest.

  I tried to make sense of Will’s wor
ds, but I couldn’t—couldn’t comprehend why he was calling me fake, acting like I had lied to him about something. That I’d manipulated him from the beginning. No sooner had one of those thoughts started to form and it was swept away in the pain of having his hatred unleashed on me. I never dreamed he could hate me. That after what we had shared, even if it was over… that he could sound like he wanted me to die. Like he wanted to help me get there.

  I had no idea how much time passed before a door slammed from somewhere in the apartment, and then my bedroom door flew open.

  As if Jasper was trying to imitate Will, my sweet, mild-mannered brother was screaming. “Adrian? Are you serious? You made a fucking sex tape with Adrian no more than two seconds after you left Will? Are you fucking kidding me? I can’t believe—” His tirade cut off abruptly when he found me on the floor. His eyes grew wide, and he covered his mouth with his hands, tears instantly springing into his eyes. “Oh my God. Harrison.”

  It was all he said before he rushed across the room, crashed to his knees, and threw his arms around me.

  And then I really began to sob.

  Twelve

  Adrian

  I want us to start out on the right foot.

  After Harrison left, his words replayed in my head. I actually looked over at the stack of journals and grinned. “Hear that, Alex? He wants us to start out on the right foot. We’re starting out.”

  There was no answer—of the audible or the touch on the neck variety. On the plus side, the journals didn’t spontaneously combust either.

  My heart soared, as did my pulse. I quite literally had just been journaling—who the fuck was I, anyway?—about my feelings for Harrison, how I wanted more, and then there he was. Kissing me, talking about us as a unit. Harrison Getty and Adrian Rivera, starting out on the right foot, together.

  Wow.

  After realizing I’d begun pacing, I started to sit down at the table by the journals again, then thought better of it, and plopped onto the sofa. What did that mean, exactly? That we were together? A couple?