by Mia Caldwell
Besides, the truth of the matter was, even if Colin had botched telling her what was going on and why, he’d helped her and Trevor out of a terrible situation. She couldn’t be mad at him for that.
“So, starting over,” she murmured. All of it was still sinking in, and before she got too comfortable she got up and took her glass of scotch from the table before settling back down.
A drink would help clear her head and set things right. The wine she’d had with the stew hadn’t hit just yet, so she thought it could use a little help.
The scotch lit a fire trail down the back of her throat, but it was smooth and robust in a way that she wasn’t used to. It made her feel sophisticated.
“Starting over,” Colin echoed. “I want to hear what you have to say about all of this. I know that I’ve taken you away from your home and everything you know, and I’ve told you my motives. What do you want to know?”
Sabela looked down into her scotch and tried to think. What would she have done, if he’d been forthright from the start?
“Well, I guess that depends on if you insinuated I was a whore or not.”
“I definitely wouldn’t have,” Colin said right away. “I never meant it to sound like that. It’s a poor excuse, but I’m not used to talking to people anymore. Or, people who don’t work for me.”
“That is kind of lame.” Sabela lifted an eyebrow and managed a half-grin. Some of the emotion was wearing off, and she was able to see Colin in a better light.
He wasn’t a bad person, he was just rough around the edges.
“Why are you so closed off to people?” she asked. Starting over mattered less than understanding where Colin was coming from.
If she knew what his motives were, maybe she could work with him through his hang-ups.
The plan depended on Colin cooperating, and by the way he looked down into his drink to avoid her gaze, Sabela knew it wasn’t going to be that easy.
“You can tell me, you know,” she said. “I’m not going to judge you or tell anyone. I don’t even know anyone you know, so I’m probably one of the best people to speak to if there’s something bothering you.”
“It’s a long story I’m not sure you’d be interested in,” Colin said at last, still staring into his scotch. “I guess it boils down to, I’ve been hurt and I’m distrustful of people in general.”
“But you can’t write off all people because someone hurt you,” Sabela insisted. Trevor acted the same way, and it was infuriating. “Life’s about more than that. And I know you haven’t known me for all that long, but you can trust me.”
“Right.”
There was something else going on, but Sabela didn’t know what it was. Whatever had happened to Colin went deep, and she wouldn’t be able to pull it out of him easily.
In time she hoped to understand.
“You know,” she said after a long pause and a few sips of scotch, “people have hurt me, too. Don’t ever feel alone. If ever you want to talk, I want to listen.”
Unsure if she should, Sabela reached out and laid a hand on Colin’s thigh. To her surprise, he smiled.
It was that same smile he’d flashed her on the slopes, the one that she wished she’d see more often. It was dazzling.
“You’re the first person who’s offered,” he confided. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
How strange it was that she was halfway across the world having a heart to heart with a man she barely knew. A man who’d taken her to his isolated chalet in the Alps because he’d seen her crying at a diner and thought she was too beautiful to be sad.
“What about you?” Colin asked. “What’s your story? Who hurt you?”
Sabela let her hand slip from his thigh and settled back against the couch. Where was she supposed to begin?
“It’s a long story, too. Some of the hurt was intentional, but most of it wasn’t.”
“I have time for you,” Colin replied. The words made her blush, and Sabela sipped at her scotch. It was disappearing fast.
“Well, my mother died when I was little. I think that’s the first time someone ever hurt me. I knew it wasn’t her fault, but I couldn’t help my feelings. And once she was gone, my dad started to drink much more than he had been before.”
It had happened so long ago, and yet the wounds still hurt. Sabela frowned.
“He drank away what little money we had, and when he finally pulled his act together after realizing what he’d done, it was too late. The alcohol poisoned his liver, and it wasn’t long after that he passed away, too.”
She’d been seventeen. It was her and Trevor, alone, and if Trevor hadn’t been of age, she was sure she would have been taken away and left to the gamble that was foster care.
“When Dad died he left us with debt, and then years later Trevor got into his accident and that sunk us. But I think what hurts the most is how he’s tuned me out, like I’m his caretaker instead of his sister.”
Colin shifted uncomfortably on the couch, and Sabela wondered if it was because she was bringing down the mood. Determined to set him at ease, she smiled.
“But that’s life, right? I know that Trevor’s going through everything I’m going through, but on top of that he’s in constant agony from his injuries. I can’t blame him for having changed.”
“He treats you badly,” Colin said, not a question, but as if he already knew the answer.
Sabela shrugged. “Sometimes. He takes his sadness out on me because I’m all he’s got. I try to remember that. He’s not himself anymore.”
“I can’t believe it,” Colin mumbled, gaze downcast.
She wasn’t sure what he meant. “I bet you can. You read my file, right? I bet you did some background checks or something before you flew me out here. You knew.”
“I didn’t mean about you. Your kindness doesn’t surprise me. Nonetheless, words on a piece of paper don’t tell the whole story.”
The way he said it was profound, and they both sat in silence as it set in. Sabela finished the scotch and twisted the glass between her palms slowly. Words never told the whole story.
“Do you ever resent your brother for what he’s done to you?” Colin asked at last. “You could be in fashion school right now. You could have a different life.”
“All the while knowing that my brother was alone and helpless? That’s not anything that would help make me feel good,” she said. “Once Trevor can take care of himself, then I’ll be able to think about going back to school.”
There was a pause in the conversation again.
“I think that you are a remarkable woman, Sabela,” he said quietly.
Tears burned her eyes, and she blinked them away. Hearing those words made a world of difference to her. Taking care of her brother had been a thankless task, and she’d often questioned if she was doing good enough, being good enough.
That Colin thought she was, warmed her insides more than the fancy brandy.
Colin was so much more than he appeared.
She wasn’t sure if it was the praise or the Scotch that put her in motion, but she swiftly leaned across the small distance between them. Colin seemed surprised at first, but he didn’t move away as she gently kissed him on the corner of his mouth.
He froze, and Sabela wondered if she had done something wrong. She pulled back slightly and looked at his face to gauge his reaction.
She saw a struggle in his eyes. Something deep down, perhaps an old hurt, put him at odds with the situation.
Sabela was about to retreat when his arm wrapped around her waist and he pulled her close.
Their lips met in full, two stories coming together for the first time.
Chapter Nineteen
THERE WAS SOMETHING ABOUT SABELA Vaughn that Colin couldn’t resist. The touch of her body was electric.
When she’d placed her hand on his thigh it had been one thing, but feeling her lips tease the corners of his was more than he could bear.
He had to have he
r.
When his lips found hers again, he could barely contain himself. Her soft skin pressing against his body was torturous. So this was what it was like to let someone in.
Colin thought he could get used to it.
He kissed her with a passion that had been pent up for years. There was something about their connection that was unearthly powerful, but he didn’t want to question it.
He had a beautiful woman on the couch by a blazing fireplace. There couldn’t be a better setting for what she made him feel, and for what he wanted to make her feel.
As his tongue explored the contours of her mouth, he tasted the scotch on her. From her personality to her values to her body, everything about Sabela intoxicated him.
She was a dangerous gem, worth infinitely more than the debt he lorded over her, and more capable of ruining him than anything else in his life. And he couldn’t resist her.
He had been genuinely interested in their conversation, and hearing about her struggles made him angrier and angrier at Trevor. Sabela was capable of so much, and her brother’s mistake stole all of it from her.
But right now, that didn’t matter. Did she know how stunning she was?
Colin’s hands roamed the contours of her body as they kissed. Against his lips, almost inaudible, she moaned and then arched underneath him.
Every part of her that he caressed responded to his touch. Every kiss he gave her was met with equal passion. Every move he made, her hands reciprocated.
Sabela wasn’t shy, and he admired that about her. He, however, had to be the one in control.
He tugged at Sabela’s silky top, and soon had it over her head and tossed aside. He sucked in his breath at what he saw.
Sabela wasn’t wearing a bra. His rigid cock somehow got even harder. At the sight of her stiffened nipples, his cock twitched.
Both of them sunk down upon the couch, and Colin savored the feeling of her slender form against the hardness of his chest. He kissed her harder now, and Sabela gasped to keep up.
He knew she was as swept up in the moment as he was.
The kiss broke, both of them gasping for breath, but Colin didn’t stay immobile for long. Even before his lungs stopped burning from how breathless she’d left him, he moved down her body and claimed one of her hardened nipples between his lips.
Lips firm, tongue darting, he lavished one nipple with attention before turning to the other. Without his lips on hers to interfere, Sabela’s moans grew louder. She arched her back against him, desperate for more.
Colin found himself just as desperate, and it was only as he looked up at her face that he felt himself start to come back to his senses.
Sabela’s mouth was slightly open, her lips plump and swollen from his hard, insistent kisses. Her skin glowed in the light from the fire. Her eyes were closed, and it was obvious she was lost in the moment.
How could one woman be so gorgeous while raw with desire?
Something twisted in the pit of Colin’s stomach. Fuck. He wanted her … badly. His throbbing cock urged him to take control, to grab what he wanted.
The predator inside of him demanded Sabela, to tear off the rest of her clothes, spread her legs and claim her with a mighty thrust. He’d drive into her until she cried his name, swore she was his … forever.
Hell. He lay his cheek against her soft breast and shuddered as Sabela’s fingers dug into his back.
Forever.
Where had that word come from? Forever had nothing to do with what he had planned for Sabela.
And on top of that, she was only there with him because he’d tricked her. He wasn’t being honest with her, and if she knew the truth, she’d think differently of him.
She certainly wouldn’t want this anymore. She wouldn’t open herself up to him, give herself over to his demands, his endless, aching need.
He could take her and he knew it, but this wasn’t how he wanted to be with her. He took a long, steadying breath, rubbed his cheek against her nipple a last time, then sat up, taking Sabela with him.
He pulled her into his lap. Her arms wrapped around his neck, and her lips found his again. He fought for control as her bottom twitched against his groin.
Nothing could stop the groan he breathed against her lips. “Hang on there, it’s not time for that yet.”
Saying it took so much willpower. How easy it would be to give in to temptation and make her his. But Colin knew that it wasn’t fair.
Something about Sabela had changed him.
She pulled back and looked at him in confusion, her features soft and sexy, adorable, expression hazy. Colin realized that there was no way they could continue even if he changed his mind. Between the wine and the glass of scotch, she was at least partially inebriated.
He wanted their first time together to be her choice, and she wasn’t able to make a decision right now. She’d said she wasn’t used to drinking, and she hadn’t exaggerated or fibbed about it.
Their night together was over.
“C-Colin?” she stammered.
“I had a great time tonight,” he whispered back, doing his best to sound warm and sincere. If it wasn’t for his guilt and her lack of sobriety, maybe things would have turned out differently.
Sabela pushed back from him and squinted, obviously displeased.
Unwilling to keep tempting himself, he got to his feet and pulled her up. She kept reaching for him as he leaned down and picked up her blouse.
“Stop. I don’t want to put it on. I want to be with you,” she said as he fitted the blouse over her head. “Colin, I want this. I want you!”
He gave her a gentle kiss to quiet her. Immediately, she softened against him. He loved feeling the weight of her body against him.
He took her by the elbow and let their gentle kisses continue even as he directed her toward the door. The touches were nothing more than flutters, leaving her wanting more and chasing his lips as they moved.
She smiled and giggled as he escorted her towards the bedroom wing. Sabela was damned adorable when she was tipsy, Colin thought.
When they reached her door, the clouds lifted as she realized where he’d taken her.
She cast a glance at her bedroom door, then down the hall to his bedroom. “I thought —”
“Get some rest. I’ll send Marie up with a late supper. Sleep well, and I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, giving her another gentle kiss.
Colin opened the door to her room and guided her inside. Sabela stumbled forward and turned to face him, but by then Colin was already back in the hall and closing the door. The last thing he saw was a perplexed expression on an achingly lovely face.
In the morning, he told himself, she’d appreciate his restraint, he was sure. He’d been honest.
If he could call it honesty. Colin hadn’t been particularly forthright with her about anything.
As soon as he was inside his own room, he closed the doors and locked them behind him. He didn’t think that Sabela would be brazen enough to pursue him, but he had known women like that in the past.
There was another bottle of scotch on the far table underneath the window. Colin moved to it and set both hands on the table, staring out at the dusky sky, at the snow falling in fat flakes.
He had been so sure about his plan and what exactly he was doing with Sabela, but knowing her made him want to forget that there ever was a plan. Sabela challenged him in ways no other woman ever had, and beyond her beauty, it drew him to her.
How was he supposed to continue?
Divided, Colin picked up the picture frame sitting on the table by the scotch. It was Blanca’s high school senior picture. Their relationship was still new then, but it was no less wonderful. She was why he was supposed to continue.
But was Blanca’s memory worth sacrificing what could be the start of something wonderful?
Colin’s fingertips traced over the frame of the photo as he remembered what she’d meant to him. Sabela’s innocence was alive in her, but the two of them
were so different in other ways.
Was that why when he looked at Sabela, he began to forget about Blanca and all she meant to him?
Colin wasn’t ready to face what this could mean. He needed to be even more careful now. The fact of the matter was, until he laid his demons to rest there would be no other way to chase thoughts of Blanca out of his head. No matter how much he wanted Sabela, she’d never be happy with a man so caught up in his own past.
If it meant ruining his chances with Sabela so he could move on, he had to do it. There would be no hope for his future otherwise.
It was wrong, though, that his happiness might come at the expense of Sabela’s.
Perhaps he could find a way to alter the plan, to minimize her exposure to the shrapnel.
The inside voice that spoke in his mother’s dulcet tones said, “Yes, that’s a start.”
And so Colin would try.
Chapter Twenty
A HANGOVER. WHEN WAS THE last time she’d been hungover? Sabela groaned and rolled over, half-crippled by a killer headache.
What had she drunk last night? A few too many glasses of wine, and then a glass of fine scotch. She should have known better than to go so hard. She’d always been a lightweight.
Day three at Haberlin Chalet was off to a miserable start. What had she done last night? Sabela remembered leaving dinner to go to the lounge, and chatting with Colin about their histories, and then …
She jerked straight up and instantly regretted it. Her head throbbed even harder. No matter how much it hurt, though, she couldn’t escape the memory of the previous night.
Colin and herself, tangled in each other’s arms on the couch, kissing. Touching. Wanting more.
Sabela groaned. “Oh my God, what did I do?”
She had ended up partially undressed, that she knew for sure. She hadn’t bothered to wear a bra under her blouse because she’d thought she was only going to score some food from the kitchen. She hadn’t expected to end up on an impromptu date with Colin.
A date.
They had food and good conversation, and then Colin invited her into his lounge for a drink. A date was exactly what last night was, and she’d been so caught up in the moment that she hadn’t seen it.