“I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have caved to pressure. I can still tell them the party’s off.”
She gave him a quick smile. “I want to say yes, but remember… one hour. Then they’re gone.”
He unclipped his seatbelt and shuffled towards her then cradled her jaw with his hand, relishing the soft skin beneath his fingers. Her breathing kicked up a notch as he leaned in. “Love you so much.” His mouth closed over hers in an all-too-brief kiss.
“Hold that thought, ace,” she muttered against his lips before he reluctantly pulled away.
As Cash got out of the car, Rachael reached them. She hugged him tightly as though she hadn’t seen him in weeks. “I’m so glad you’re both home.”
“Us too,” he said, extricating himself from his mother’s arms so he could unhook Darcey’s car seat. He lifted his daughter out of the car and held a hand out for Natalia. “Mum, do us a favour. After an hour, call a halt to things, okay? Natalia’s tired, and I don’t want everyone outstaying their welcome.”
“Leave it with me.” She linked her arm through Natalia’s and seized the car seat from Cash. “Get the cases, darling,” she said, drawing a giggle from Natalia. Rachael was one of a few people able to get away with ordering Cash about.
For the next hour, everyone fought over who would get to cuddle Darcey next. Natalia sat back, allowing them all to have a piece of her precious child, but Cash could see her hands itching, wanting to snatch Darcey away from them.
“Soon be over,” he said, nuzzling her ear.
“I’m trying so hard.” She rested her head on his shoulder.
“You’re doing great, baby. We’re the first out of all of us to have one, apart from Mum. It’s a novelty, that’s all.”
True to her promise, after an hour Rachael began to corral the group into leaving. Their friends extended the hour with goodbyes and promises that they’d be there if either Cash or Natalia needed them, and then he was finally able to close the door. He sagged against it and closed his eyes, relishing the silence.
When he walked back into the living room, Natalia was settling Darcey into her Moses basket. He waited for her to finish, and then he snaked his arms around her waist, his chin resting on her shoulder. “Alone at last,” he murmured, his teeth nipping her earlobe.
Natalia covered his hands with her own and tilted her head to the side, giving him access to her neck. “Ace?” she said as he kissed from jaw to shoulder.
“Yeah?”
“You know what I really want?”
“Me.” He smiled against her neck.
“Before that.”
“Name it.”
“A bath.”
Cash straightened. “You got it, sweetness. Stay here, and I’ll go and run it.”
Tally tucked the covers around Darcey, her heart bursting with love. Ever since she’d gone into labour, she’d suffered so much stress and worry, but all that was behind them. They were home with their perfectly healthy daughter. Darcey’s arrival seemed to have grounded Cash. He was centred and calm, as though having Darcey had finally chased away his demons. Sometimes, when Cash didn’t think she was watching, she caught him gazing at their daughter with a mixture of wonderment, adoration, and love.
She leaned over the Moses basket and kissed her sweet baby, breathing in that special smell only babies had. She was desperate to hold her, to feel her safe and warm in her arms, but Darcey had been passed around too much already and was fast asleep, arms angled next to her head. Her plump cheeks were flushed and her mouth parted. She looked so much like Cash it was uncanny. There was certainly no denying she was his child. If Darcey hadn’t had Tally’s eyes, Tally wouldn’t have believed she and her daughter were related.
She stretched out her back. A bath, bed, and falling asleep in Cash’s arms sounded like her version of heaven. She placed the baby monitor on the table next to the Moses basket and grabbed the other one to take upstairs with her. She’d almost reached the bathroom when a knock at the door halted her progress.
“Great,” she groaned. “Who’s forgotten something?”
She trudged back downstairs, eyelids heavy with exhaustion. She unbolted the door and opened it a crack. Her eyes widened.
“Meredith,” she said, immediately recognising the woman she’d had a brief conversation with outside the NICU the day after Darcey was born. “What are you doing here?”
Meredith was wringing her hands, her face full of angst. “Can I come in, Tally? I’m afraid I haven’t been completely honest with you.”
Tally frowned. “It’s not a great time. I’ve only just got home from the hospital.”
“I know. I followed you. I’ve been waiting for everyone to leave.”
“You followed us?” Hairs stood up on the back of her neck. A stranger had managed to follow them home, to find out where they lived. She’d hoped they wouldn’t have to live surrounded by walls and gates and cameras, but it looked like she’d been wrong. “Why?”
“Let’s do this inside.”
Meredith began to move forward, but Tally put her arm out, blocking her entrance. “Actually, I think I’d rather do it right here. What’s going on?”
Meredith looked her straight in the eye. “It has taken me a long time to pluck up the courage to do this. Tally, I’m your mother.”
35
Tally stared as her jaw dropped open. Her stomach tied itself in knots, and a horrible sickly feeling spread through her gut. Her mouth dried up as she gave a slow, disbelieving shake of her head.
“Impossible. My mother left when I was four, and I haven’t seen her since. And her name was Martine, not Meredith. I’m not sure what game you’re playing here, but at least get your facts straight.”
“I changed my name some years back. Meredith is nothing like Martine. Please, if you let me in, I’ll explain everything.”
Meredith tried to capture Tally’s hand in hers, but Tally snatched her hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
“I know what you must be thinking.”
“No you don’t,” Tally said. “You don’t know anything about me. Anything at all.”
“Please. I’d like an opportunity to explain.”
“I’m not interested!” She was yelling now, her stomach tightening painfully. This could not be happening. It had to be a lie. A cruel, vicious lie.
“What the hell is going on?” Cash appeared behind her, his hands warm and comforting as he placed them on her shoulders. “Who are you?”
“I’m––”
“This is my mother, apparently,” Tally cut in, bitter and hurt. “At least according to her.”
Meredith pressed her hands together and gave Tally a beseeching look. “Please, Tally, let me come in.”
Cash stepped in front of Tally, partially blocking her view of Meredith. “I think Natalia has made it clear she doesn’t want to speak to you. Now, you can leave under your own steam, or I can call my security to have you escorted. Your choice.”
“Cash, surely you know how wonderful it is to have your mother back in your life after a long absence. I’m only trying to give my daughter the same opportunity.”
Tally gasped at the blatant cheek of the woman. Cash’s whole body stiffened. She placed a warning hand on his back, even though it wouldn’t make a difference.
“How fucking dare you,” he bit out. “My mother had no choice. She was in a fucking coma. You, on the other hand, pissed off and left your daughter without a backward glance.” He leaned in, his face inches from Meredith’s. “I don’t know what your game is, but know this. We’re not interested. Now, fuck off.”
He slammed the door. His body trembled as he pulled Tally into his arms. “You okay, baby?”
She nuzzled against his chest. “No, I’m not. What could she possibly want after all these years?”
“No idea. But I don’t want you worrying about it right now. Your bath’s ready.”
He pointed her towards the stairs, but Tally veered off, heading for th
e living room instead.
“Babe, where are you going?” Cash called after her.
Ignoring him, she headed straight for Darcey’s basket. As she lifted her in the air, her daughter immediately began to cry, incensed at being woken. Tally cradled her, kissed her warm, plump cheek, and whispered loving words into her ear. How could her own mother have left her? Nothing could ever tear her away from her daughter.
Her tears began to mingle with Darcey’s, and she startled when Cash wrapped his arms around them both.
“I’m so sorry, baby.”
She leaned into him, absorbing his strength because she had none left. An aching hollowness that had started in her stomach spread to her heart. She’d thought her mother couldn’t hurt her any more. Turned out she was wrong.
“How could she do it, Cash? How did she walk away, leaving her child behind? I don’t understand. She must be evil.”
Cash kissed her temple. “I wish I had the answers for you, but I don’t.” He lifted Darcey out of her arms, rubbing soothing circles on his daughter’s back. “Go and get in the bath. You’re exhausted. I can’t promise you’ll feel better after some rest, but it couldn’t hurt.”
She nodded in agreement. No doubt her overtiredness was making this fubar situation appear worse. With a firm grip on the handrail to support herself, she trudged upstairs.
Steam rose from the bath, along with the scent of salts and bubbles Cash had added. She stripped off and sank down into the hot water. Closing her eyes, she steadied her breathing and tried to push her mother from her mind. She’d been there about five minutes when Cash appeared.
“Want me to scrub your back?” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.
She grinned. “Thank God for you. Is Darcey okay?”
“She’s fine. Fast asleep again. I’m starting to feel hopeful we have one of those babies who sleep sixteen hours a day.”
Tally tapped her head. “Touch wood.”
Cash sat on the edge of the bath and tugged a stray hair from the corner of her mouth. “I found this on the floor in the hall.” He held up a piece of paper.
“What is it?”
“Your mother’s phone number with a plea for you to call her. What do you want me to do with it?”
Tally’s first instinct was to tell him to tear it up into a million pieces and throw it away, but then a sliver of curiosity crept in. Why had her mother chosen now to come back into her life? Was it anything to do with Darcey or Cash, or a complete coincidence?
“Nothing for now,” she said. “I’m going to talk to Pete. He’s always been very unwilling to share what happened between my mother and father, but now he’s got no choice. I’ll call him tomorrow.”
“Okay. I’ll leave it on the hall table downstairs.”
As Cash stood to leave, she wrapped her hand around his forearm. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, ace,” she said, trying to paint on a bright smile but knowing she’d fallen way short.
Cash leaned over, kissing her briefly on the lips. “I’m here, sweetness.”
Darcey woke twice in the night, disproving Cash’s theory that she was going to be one of those rare children who slept through from birth. At least Tally had some milk expressed, so Cash took one shift, and she took the other.
When she finally woke the next morning, the utter exhaustion of the previous day had receded, and she felt more able to cope with the shock of her mother turning up after a twenty-two-year absence. Cash’s side of the bed was cold, meaning he’d been up for a while, and when she looked across at Darcey’s cot, it was empty.
A slow smile crept across her lips. God, she was lucky. Her time without Cash during the early part of her pregnancy seemed like another lifetime, almost as though it hadn’t happened to her. She shook off any regrets that she hadn’t told him sooner. They were no use to her now.
She rose out of bed and pulled on her dressing gown. As she headed downstairs, the smell of freshly brewed coffee tickled her nostrils. At the entrance to the kitchen, she paused and drank in the scene before her. Cash was holding Darcey over his shoulder, one hand curved under her bottom while he poured coffee into two mugs with the other. He was humming a lullaby under his breath.
“If all those female fans could see you now,” Tally said with a grin.
Cash glanced around, a look of contentment plastered on his face. “Dream stuff. That’s me, sweetness.”
“You got that right,” she said, holding her arms out.
Cash passed Darcey over. “We didn’t wake you, did we?”
“Nope. Dead to the world. Hi, baby girl,” she said, kissing her plump cheek. “Has she been fed?”
“Yep. And winded. And changed. I told you, dream stuff.”
Tally laughed. Holding Darcey in exactly the same position as Cash had, she swept her free hand over his arse. “More like hot stuff,” she said, tilting her face up for a kiss. Cash obliged, his lips warm, his kiss all too brief.
“Not in front of the B.A.B.Y.,” he said, wagging his finger at her.
“That is never going to work.”
“You’re probably right. Never have been able to keep my hands off you.” He passed her a cup of coffee, and she took a sip.
“Just what I needed.”
“Are you calling Pete this morning?”
Tally sighed. “Yeah. I’ll see if he can come around after work.”
“How do you feel about it today?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m overwhelmed by so many emotions—anger, confusion, frustration—and I can’t help being suspicious as to why she’s chosen now to turn up. Pete’s going to have no choice but to tell me what happened now.”
“You never asked him about her?” Cash said, with more than a hint of incredulity to his tone. “Or your dad?”
Tally shook her head. “I was too young when she left, and by the time I reached my teenage years, I was so pissed off that she’d abandoned me I wouldn’t have wanted to talk about her even if they did want that discussion—which they didn’t.”
“Should make for an interesting conversation later, then.”
Darcey wriggled in Tally’s arms, her legs surprisingly strong as she kicked out. She screwed her face up, intense concentration making her eyes disappear behind scrunched lids, before she let out a loud wail.
“Here, give her to me,” Cash said. “Call Pete.”
Tally clicked the living room door shut and picked up her phone. She sat on the window seat, her knees curled into her chest. The sky was a deep aqua—very unusual for England, where soft blue was the norm. She pushed open the window, and a light breeze blew hair across her face.
“Hey, Tal,” Pete said when he picked up her call. “Hope we didn’t outstay our welcome yesterday.”
“Of course not,” she lied. “We loved having you.”
“How’s Darcey settling in?”
“Great,” Tally said. “She woke a couple of times last night, but she seems to like her new home.”
“And Cash. Is he pulling his weight?”
“Enough to make me think I’m surplus to requirements, apart from providing a food-on-demand service. The two of them are inseparable.”
Pete’s sigh of relief was unmistakeable. “That’s good.”
“You had doubts?”
“Honestly, yes, I did. The two of you have had more than your fair share of ups and downs, and I wasn’t sure whether he was cut out for fatherhood.”
“He’d say the same thing, but honestly, Pete, he’s the most natural parent I’ve ever seen. When I woke up this morning, he’d already fed and changed her and was making me a coffee with one hand and holding Darcey with the other.”
Pete chuckled. “I’m happy for you, Tally. You deserve the best of everything. About time the rollercoaster pulled into the station so you could get off, right?”
Tally bit her lip. If only that was the reality. “I was wondering if you wanted to come for dinner tonight.”
Pete’s pause was brie
f, but it was there. “Is everything okay?”
He’s always been able to read me.
“Yes,” she answered a little too quickly. “I’m making pasta.”
“Well, in that case, I wouldn’t miss it. What time do you want me?”
“Seven? You can see Darcey before I put her down.”
“Seven it is.”
She tossed her phone to one side and stared out of the window, hoping for some inspiration or at least an idea of where to start the conversation with Pete.
Trouble was, it didn’t matter where she began, because even though she knew nothing of the reason her mother left, the fact neither her father nor Pete had ever spoken to her about it meant only one thing—she wasn’t going to like what she heard.
36
“She’s adorable,” Pete said as Tally tucked the bedclothes tightly around Darcey and nestled Gary the Gorilla next to her, a gift from Kinga that Cash detested. He thought it wasn’t feminine enough for his special girl, but Darcey loved it, and Tally had discovered her daughter slept better when Gary was in close proximity.
“She wasn’t adorable at three this morning,” Tally grumbled. “Screamed the house down. Good job we don’t have close neighbours. They’d be reporting us for noise pollution.” She leaned over the cot and kissed her daughter’s forehead. “Wouldn’t change a second, though.”
Pete draped an arm casually over her shoulder. “Let’s go and eat, and then you can tell me what’s bugging you.”
Tally gave him a weak smile. “Am I that transparent?”
“Nah,” Pete said. “But I’ve known you your whole life, kid.”
Cash had already put the water on to boil, so they were ready to eat five minutes later. Pete did his usual trick of wearing more sauce than he ate, and the familiarity of it comforted Tally when she needed it the most. This wonderful man had been her saviour after her dad died, taking her in, letting her disrupt his perfect bachelor lifestyle with teenage hormones and temper tantrums.
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