by Jenika Snow
Right here, right now, with the way he looked at me, that whatever was going on between us was … real.
He wanted me the way I wanted him, and all I wanted to do was be with him.
I didn’t care if there were any risks in being with Brendan, or even if I should.
I felt him playing with the wisps of hair by my ear, and chills raced up my spine. The tips of his fingers would brush the curve of my ear every so often, and I just wanted to be strong here and go for what I wanted … him. We might have said we loved each other, but it still felt so unreal.
“It’s only ever been you, Meghan.”
“That’s so hard to believe,” I said sincerely. Brendan was gorgeous, smart, and witty. He drew people in. He could have had anyone he wanted, even if I’d never actually seen him with anyone.
He shook his head and looked at my mouth again. I felt him move his fingers along my jawline and then over my cheek. I parted my mouth as I sucked in a breath when I felt him move those digits along my lips.
“No, it’s just you for me. It always has been.” He moved just a little closer so his body was now pressed against mine. I made this involuntary noise in the back of my throat when his muscles came in contact with my softness.
I also felt how hard he was.
Big.
Thick.
Long.
And all because of me.
“I can’t even think of anyone else because I’m so fucking in love with you,” he murmured, still looking at my mouth, still running his fingers along the swell of my bottom lip. “I don’t ever want anyone else, Meghan, and I’ve been working up the courage, trying to be a man about it all, and tell you how I felt for years now.”
I couldn’t think, couldn’t even breathe after he spoke.
“I want to show you with my mouth,” he said low, deep, his voice moving along my flesh. “I want to show you with my tongue and hands how much you mean to me.” He pressed his lower body harder against mine. “And I want to show you with my cock just how good I can make you feel.”
Oh. Shit. I had definitely just fallen down the rabbit hole.
8
Brendan
I wanted to kiss her so fucking badly, but I was also still reeling over the fact the woman I loved felt the same way.
She looked so vulnerable and beautiful right now. Hell, she even had a towel wrapped around her head.
I stared at Meghan, looked at her lush, pink lips, and wanted to get lost in kissing her. I wanted her to be weak in the knees as I devoured her mouth. I wanted her to be so scatterbrained over what I was doing to her she could only hold on to me.
Fuck. I wanted to take control, but in the way that had her screaming my name and getting off all over my cock.
Yeah, maybe I was going a little fast, seeing as we’d just professed how we felt, but it seemed like the perfect opportunity to really show her what she meant to me.
I wanted her to really see how devoted I was to her, that this whole time it had only been her in my eyes, taking root right in my heart.
It was only her I’d ever love, and I wanted to show her in the most physical sense.
But I wouldn’t rush her. This was on her terms, on her time. I’d go as slow or fast as she wanted, because I wasn’t letting her go.
“I want to kiss you so fucking badly,” I said, more to myself than anything else. But the little sound she made after I said it had my cock jerking so fucking fiercely it was like it was its own entity.
“I want you to kiss me,” she whispered and looked down at my mouth. “Is this crazy?” she asked.
“No. It’s fucking perfect. You’re perfect,” I said instantly. I waited until she lifted her gaze and stared at me in the eyes. “And you’re mine, Meghan. You always have been.”
And then I snapped, all self-control just leaving me as the gravity of this situation settled into me.
Meghan loved me.
She wanted me.
I wouldn’t deny either of us.
I cupped her face with my hands, tilted her head to the side slightly, and finally claimed her mouth. She tasted sweet, innocent, and all mine. The way she gasped, opened her mouth slightly, and let me have my way with her, had me so fucking turned on I could have come in my pants just from kissing her alone.
When she rose on her toes, pressing her chest to mine, and I felt the curves that made up her body, I groaned, not able to hold the sound in, not wanting to hold it in. My cock jerked behind the fly of my jeans, and I wanted more, needed it. My heart was beating wildly, and I wanted to kiss her harder, possess her, and have her consume every part of me.
What I wanted to do to Meghan was filthy, but only in the best ways, only for her. As the kissing intensified, and I felt her grab my biceps, digging her nails into my flesh, what little control I had snapped. I pulled the towel from her head and tangled my hands in the dark fall of her damp hair.
She’d have to shower again, because when I was done with her, she’d be fucking sweaty as hell.
I thrust my tongue in her mouth, groaning, the sound guttural and full of need.
“God, this is how I imagined it, but so much better,” I murmured against her mouth. I slid one of my hands down her chest and wrapped my arm around her waist. Without thinking about what I was doing, I used my strength to lift her off the ground. Thank fuck she wrapped her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. I pressed her fully against the wall, settled my pelvis between her spread thighs, and ground my hard cock against her pussy. God, I could feel how hot she was, and it was all for me.
I stroked my tongue along hers and pulled it deeper into my mouth, loving that she moaned for me. I couldn’t help but thrust my cock harder against her pussy, wanting desperately to have nothing between us so I could be buried inside her.
I broke the kiss after long seconds and looked down at her face. Her mouth was swollen and red, and it was all because of me.
“I want you so fucking badly.” I’d been drinking tonight, had a good buzz going on, but after hearing Meghan say she loved me, knowing she wanted this … me, I had sobered up considerably. I wanted to make her feel good.
I wanted to make her come.
I was so fucking possessive of her, and if she only knew I’d scared off any guy that thought they could have her, she might think I was a damn creep. But I wanted her to know, wanted to be honest with her. Even if it was like a splash of cold water on this situation, she needed to know.
“I want to get it all out in the open.”
My heart was pounding fast and hard.
“I’ve loved you for so long, Meghan. I loved you before I even knew what that was.” I looked at her lips, so red, so swollen. “I haven’t been with anyone because I want you. Only you.”
“Brendan—”
“It’s only ever been you, and because of that, I’ve watched you, gone to your school to make sure you were okay, and kept fuckers back.”
She parted her lips slightly, and I wished I knew what she was thinking.
“I’ve scared them off, told them if they fucked with you I’d fuck them up.”
She didn’t speak, but her breathing picked up.
“I’m not proud of the lengths I’ve gone to, of the fact I watched over you, protected you, Meghan. I won’t apologize for any of it. I can’t.”
She didn’t speak for long seconds and wouldn’t look me in the eye. “You came to my school, watched me, and scared off any guys that tried to, what, date me?”
We untangled each other’s limbs from the other, and I moved a step back, making sure she was stable. “Yeah. I said I wasn’t proud of it, but I also won’t deny I liked knowing you were safe, untouched from those assholes that would use you and leave you.”
She knitted her brow. “But you didn’t know that. They could have been really sweet, Brendan.”
I shrugged. “It doesn’t matter, because I didn’t want any guy, asshole or gentleman, being with you.”
More silence st
retched.
“That’s … intense, Brendan.”
I nodded. She lifted her head and looked me in the eye again. “You didn’t have to tell me that.”
I nodded. “I know.”
“Why then? Why not keep that to yourself, because you have to know that’s kind of crazy.”
I nodded again. “Yeah, it is, but I love you, and I want to be honest with you. I want you to know there is no one else for me. I wanted it all laid out there, Meghan.”
A part of me regretted telling her, but I knew this was the right thing.
“You know you wouldn’t have had to scare anyone off. I only wanted you.”
My heart started beating harder at her words.
“I love you, Brendan, and I wish so much time hadn’t passed where I kept all of this bottled up.”
I cupped her face again, so fucking glad she hadn’t pushed me away. She would have had every right to after what I admitted, but she just looked up at me with this sincerity in her eyes.
My girl loved me, and I was so not going to fuck this up.
“I still want this,” she whispered.
I felt my cock jerk.
“This is about you and me,” I said, looking into her eyes. “It’s always been about you and me. I want to show you how good this can be, how good I can treat you.”
“Be my first, Brendan.”
I closed my eyes and groaned. Knowing she was pure, a fucking virgin, made me feel like a fucking dirty bastard for what I wanted to do to her.
“I’ve never had sex either, Meghan,” I said again, wanting her to really know the truth of it. I wasn’t ashamed of admitting that. I didn’t even care that some guys would think this a lame-ass admission. I was proud I had never been with anyone else. She was it for me, always had been, and tonight we’d give each other our virginities, and all would be fucking right in the world.
Meghan would be mine.
“God, is this for real?” she seemed to whisper to herself.
“Baby, this is as real as it gets.”
Then I kissed her again, showing her with my body just how much I meant my words.
It didn’t matter if I had never had sex, because I knew as soon as I was with Meghan, as soon as I was deep in her pussy, claiming her virginity the way she claimed mine, things would just fall into place.
Perfection happened like that.
I crushed her to me again, speared my hands in her hair, and kissed her until we were both gasping for air, and I felt like I was about to shoot my load right in my jeans.
I’d jerked off so many times over the years thinking of Meghan, picturing myself with her and the sweet satisfaction of finally having her.
This was my reality now, and fuck, would it be perfect.
I had my hands on the sides of her neck, holding her still as I mouth fucked her. And there was no other way to describe what I was doing to her.
She arched into me, her breasts pressing into my chest, letting me feel how hard her nipples were. She was primed for me. I knew that without a doubt.
Hell, I was ready for her now. I could have gotten off just from kissing her if I let my control slip any more.
When she was panting against my mouth, I pulled back, forcing myself to break the kiss. Hell, I didn’t want to, but as hot as it sounded fucking her right up against this wall, I wanted her in my bed, my scent surrounding her, and her hair spread across my pillow.
I had her away from the wall, but still in my arms, a second later. Burying my face in her neck, I inhaled deeply, getting drunk on her scent. I was still stunned at the fact this was happening.
When I was in the bedroom, I carried her over to the bed, laid her on it, and just stared down at the woman I loved. God, she was perfect, and mine, and I wanted to go slow, to make this last, but I was having one hell of a time keeping my control reigned in. I might never have had sex before, preferring to save myself for the one girl I loved more than anything, but hell, I knew I could please her.
She was at the top of my list, my priority, and there was nothing I wouldn’t do to make her happy.
“Come here,” she said softly, and I didn’t even think about not doing what she wanted. Hell, if she wanted me on my hands and knees and crawling to her, begging to lick her pussy, I would have gladly done that and asked for more. Shit, just thinking about doing that, spreading her pussy lips with my fingers so I could feast on her, had me crazy with desire. I wanted to palm my cock through my jeans, stroke the fucker before I put it in her.
Yeah, I wanted to be deep in her, so deep there wasn’t a place I wasn’t touching; there was no doubt she was mine.
I got on the bed, looked down at her delicate-looking foot with the red painted toenails, and told myself to go slow. It wasn’t because I thought I’d be too intense and raw—although that was true too because I was so far gone for her—but more because I could get off without even being in her.
“I need to get you naked,” I said, and no sooner was that last word out than Meghan was taking off her clothes. I was frozen as I watched her creamy smooth skin being revealed, loved the fact she was bra- and even panty-less.
Then she was naked, ready, willing, and all mine.
No matter how much I wanted this to last, I knew there was no way I could stretch this out. I was just too far-gone for her. I let my gaze travel over her legs, stopped for a second to stare at her pussy, which was covered in a thatch of trimmed dark hair, and kept lifting my eyes over her belly, big breasts tipped with pink nipples, and finally stopped at her mouth.
I groaned as she ran her tongue along the bottom swell. I lowered myself to her mouth and ran my tongue over first her top lip and then her bottom. She made this sweet, sexy little mewl, and I added pressure, kissing her fiercely.
“I need you,” she said against my mouth, and I groaned. Pulling back and looking at her face, my fucking control snapped. “I’m barely hanging on as it is, Brendan.”
“Fuck.” Desperation was clear on her expression, and I didn’t want to make her wait. I didn’t want to wait either. “I want to make this special, go slow, be romantic—”
“I didn’t ask for slow or romantic. I want it exactly the way you want to give it to me.”
Christ.
“I could devour you until nothing is left, baby.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat.
“I want that,” she said with this thick voice laced with her pleasure. “I don’t want to stop once this starts, but can we start?”
I grinned. She was demanding, and fuck, did it feel good knowing she wanted me this way. But the reality of the situation also hit me. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I just want you. Be with me.”
My throat tightened after she spoke.
“What if I can only give you raw and hard? What if I can’t control myself enough to be gentle, Meghan?”
“I just want you.”
Well fuck, seemed like the woman I loved wasn’t as innocent as I thought.
Thank. Fucking. God. I didn’t think I could do easy right now, not when the woman of my fantasies was laying naked under me.
9
Meghan
This is really happening.
Every part of me felt like it was moving between hot and cold, frigid and blistering. I couldn’t deny the way he looked at me was like a man possessed, like he was so obsessed with me he couldn’t even control himself. Maybe that should have scared me, but the truth was I found it hot, so damn scorching I couldn’t think straight.
I’d been saving myself not because I thought I’d ever have a chance with Brendan, but because I loved him so much no other man did it for me.
And to know he loved me too…God, I felt like I was living someone else’s life. I was nervous, yes, but I wanted Brendan the way he wanted to take me. I knew that would be fast, hard, unforgiving, but it was all because he loved me and couldn’t control himself. Hell, I felt the same way.
“I want you,” I said, lifting my hand
s and running them up his arms. “I want you just as naked as I am.”
He made this low sound deep within his chest. His entire body was so big, so tight, as if he were trying to appear like this wasn’t affecting him the way it really was.
The same way it was affecting me.
I watched as his pupils dilated, and as the seconds passed, our breathing increased, and his body seemed to get tighter, I knew this was going to be insanely passionate.
Then he was on me, his hands on my chest, his mouth on mine. He kissed me for long seconds, plunging his tongue in and out of my mouth, claiming me. He broke the kiss and moved his mouth along my cheek, over my jaw, and started sucking at my pulse point right below my ear. He shifted on top of me slightly, and I felt his hard cock digging right over my pussy.
“I need you naked, Brendan,” I gasped out.
He started pressing his jean-clad erection against my pussy, and I felt how big he was, how thick and long.
I was wet, obscenely so.
He pulled away to take off his t-shirt and toss it aside. I looked at his hard, smooth chest. He was defined in all the right places—so masculine it was hard not to feel so very feminine with him.
“You want me to touch you, make you feel good?” God, his voice was so husky, so deep.
“Yes,” I said without hesitation.
“Show me, Meghan, baby. Show me where you want me to make you feel good.”
I was so turned on it was like I couldn’t even think straight. It was like I was drunk, so intoxicated I felt like this was not quite reality.
“I want you to touch me everywhere.” I wasn’t exaggerating.
“Show me,” he said with more force, more dominance, and moved back another inch, giving me some room.
I lifted my hand, smoothed it down my belly, over my mound, and placed it right between my legs.