by Jenika Snow
Because when it came to what I held most dear, I was a fucking protective bastard.
Maddie
I set the plate on the table, the smell of steak, potatoes, and freshly baked bread filling the dining room. It had been four years since Deacon and I had made our relationship official; four years since he told me I was his.
A smile spread across my face when I looked down at the wedding ring on my left hand. Even after al these years later I still felt like I was a newlywed. I knew it would always be like that, knew that there would be nothing that ever changed that.
I heard a car door slam shut outside and I smiled, knowing Deacon was home. The front door opened and closed and the sound of his heavy footfalls came closer.
“Baby?” He called out for me but rounded the corner and entered the kitchen before I could respond.
I could see the dirt covering his body from his hard day of work, but that didn’t stop me from going over to him and wrapping my arms around his waist, hugging him tightly. He did the same to me, his body so much bigger than mine, masculinity pouring from him. I heard him inhale deeply and knew he smelled my hair. Although it sounded strange, and maybe even a little unbelievable, it was that scent of metal that clung to him that let me know he was right here with me.
It let me know that he was mine just as I was his.
“I missed you.” His deep voice rumbled against me and I smiled, saying the same thing in return. He pulled back and cupped my cheeks with his big hands before leaning down and claiming my mouth. I opened for him, stroking my tongue along his, feeling my body heat instantly. I had this reaction for Deacon always, and it didn’t matter how many years passed, I still had this intense fire burning inside of me for him.
When I pulled back he was a bit resistant, and I chuckled, loving that he didn’t want to let me go. “I hope you’re hungry because I made enough to feed an army.” Deacon was a big man, tall and big, muscular and powerful. He worked hard all day, his shop taking a lot out of him, as it was physically strenuous. I worked during the day, too, but every evening I always made sure I was the one who made him a nice home cooked meal. It was something I wanted to do, how I wanted to take care of my man. A shiver worked its way through me at the thought of all the ways he took care of me.
I didn’t need to work, didn’t have to contribute financially to the household, but I liked getting out and being independent, liked having something to do with my time, a purpose with my degree.
“I could eat enough to feed an army, baby.” He leaned down and kissed the crown of my head, and pulled back fully. “The kids asleep?”
I nodded. “They had a fun day with Grandma, and she tired them out.”
Deacon chuckled.
Once we were seated at the table, the food dished out on our plates, this comfort filled me. He told me about his day, and I did the same. We laughed at random things, and he reached across the table to hold my hand as he ate the rest of his meal.
I loved this man more than anything else in this world, and I couldn’t wait to see what the future held for us. At that thought I covered my belly with my hand, knowing that the little life that grew inside of me was a game changer … in the best of ways. We had two children already, a wonderful little boy who looked like his father, and a little girl who was spunky and rambunctious. But we had room for more, not just in our home but in our life, as well. I smiled widely, so excited to reveal to Deacon that we would be parents again.
And after we were finished eating and the conversation was light and joyful, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the pregnancy test that showed a positive line. Deacon let go of my hand and picked up the little stick, staring at it for long seconds, his eyes wide. My heart was thundering, my mouth dry, my throat tight.
He looked at me and the smile that spread across as his face was large, genuine. “Abigail might be pissed she has to compete for her mom’s attention again.”
I laughed. When our son was born our little girl was very jealous that I was spending so much time with the baby, but as time went on she became a little mommy herself to her brother. I knew it would be the same with this one, knew she’d want to help feed and change the baby, give it kisses and read him or her books. “I think she’ll do okay.”
Deacon nodded. He stood and walked over to me, pulled me up from the chair and just held me. We stood like that for long seconds, and I reveled in it, soaking up the love that I felt for this man.
“I love you, baby,” he said softly against my hair.
“I love you too.”
“You make me so fucking happy.” Leave it to Deacon to tell me something sweet in his own gruff way. I smiled at that, loving it.
“And you make me so fucking happy, too.” We both laughed at that and he held me tighter.
Yeah, this was what heaven surely felt like.
Copyright
BRUTAL (A Real Man, 11)
By Jenika Snow
www.JenikaSnow.com
[email protected]
Copyright © April 2017 by Jenika Snow
First E-book Publication: April 2017
Photographer: Wander Aguiar :: Photography
Cover model: Dylan Horsch
Photo provided by: Wander Book Club
Editor: Kasi Alexander
Line Editor: Lea Ann Schafer
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: The unauthorized reproduction, transmission, or distribution of any part of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.
This literary work is fiction. Any name, places, characters and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or establishments is solely coincidental.
Please respect the author and do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials that would violate the author’s rights.
He’s loved her his entire life.
Axel
She’s been my best friend since we were five years old.
She’s been the girl I’ve loved for just as long.
I box—fight bloody—for a living, and at every fight she’s there, cheering me on, being my girl whether she knows it or not.
She’s the one who tends my cuts, because I don’t want anyone else touching me.
I don’t want anyone else. I’ve never been with anyone else because for me she’s it. She’s my world.
It’s time I told Roxie how I feel, because there’s no way I can hold in my feelings any longer.
Roxie
I want to think the looks, the possessiveness that comes from him means he wants me the same way I want him. He’s been in my life for longer than I can remember, and I never want that to change.
I’ll be with him until the end. My love for him runs so deep, so strong I can’t breathe at times.
I watch as he pushes other girls away, his gaze locked on mine as if he’s trying to tell me there isn’t anyone else for him.
But I’m afraid to turn our relationship from friends to lovers. I’m afraid of crossing that line that could ruin what we have.
Warning: This is a super sweet friends-to-lovers story. Don’t worry; it still has that OTT alpha hero who’s head over heels in love with his woman and caveman to a fault. Grab some ice, because it’s going to get hot in here!
1
Axel
Having Roxie here made me feel stronger, had my blood rushing through my veins, my heart pumping harder, faster. I glanced at the girl I loved—secretly—and saw that she was worried. This was only practice, me boxing with one of the guys at the gym, one of my friends, but she worried for me.
“Dude, pay attention,” Lenny said, his words muffled by the mouth guard. He glanced at Roxie, and I saw the smirk that covered his face. I swung out, knocking him back with the force.
One of these days I was going to grow some balls, pull Roxie in close, and kiss her sensele
ss. One of these fucking days I’d tell Roxie I loved her, damned if the friendship was ruined or not. Being around her and not kissing her, holding her, letting the world see she was mine was so fucking painful I’d risk anything for the chance to claim her.
I just needed to grow those balls first.
Roxie
I always hated watching Axel fight, even though I knew he’d win. The fact he was getting violent with someone else scared the shit out of me.
Axel ducked, dodged the punch, swung out, and drew blood. He was vicious in the ring, his blue boxing gloves standing out against the red of his opponent’s. Over and over he did this, hitting, blocking, his focus on the other guy, his moves precise. I glanced at the clock, the time seeming to speed up, then slow to a halt. I had to leave for work soon, but not before I saw him win.
This was only practice, but I had to make sure he was okay.
I saw the other boxer say something to Axel, although it was too low for me to hear. And then the other guy glanced at me, grinning around his mouth guard, making me feel pissed for Axel. The guy did this to piss Axel off. I knew that, knew he was trying to get under Axel’s skin.
But he should have known better, should have known taunting Axel would only lead to him on his ass.
And sure enough, Axel delivered a punch to the face that had the guy on his back, out cold.
I took a few steps away as the trainer went closer and motioned Axel over. They started talking. I turned my back to the ring, grabbed the rest of my stuff, and felt someone behind me. I smiled and turned around.
Axel stood there, all six-foot-three inches of him, his body glossy with sweat, his massive chest rising and falling. He grinned down at me, gestured to my bag, and because I knew he’d keep bugging me until I gave in, I handed it over.
“You have time for me to shower?”
I glanced at the clock. “Only if you can do it in five minutes.”
“Done.” He turned, but I called him back.
“Um, my bag.” I chuckled when he handed it over. “You can be all manly and carry it when you’re done.”
He winked and I felt my heart start to race. I watched him walk away, not knowing if I’d ever have the nerve to tell the boy I cared about—the man he’d grown into—that I loved him. For years, ever since I knew what the word meant, what it would feel like, I knew I wanted Axel as mine.
I needed to be his, wanted to show him that we were meant for each other. I could pretend that I “saw” the way he looked at me, that maybe he felt the same way. But at twenty-two, the years passing, and nothing being said, I pushed any notion about that I’d have anything with her.
I chalked it up to my own fantasies.
I brought my bag over to the bench, sat down, and stared at the other boxers training. Some were back in the ring; others were working out or hitting the red punching bag violently.
“Hey.”
I glanced up at Liam, one of the other boxers Axel trained with. He was younger, maybe eighteen.
“Hi,” I said. He was a lot smaller than Axel, leaner, like a swimmer. He was either coming or going, with his bag slung over his shoulder and his jacket on.
“There’s a small party later tonight at one of the guys’ houses. Everyone from the gym should be there, and lots of food and booze. If you don’t have any plans, we can hit it up, relax a bit?”
A shadow crossed over Liam, and I knew Axel was already out of the shower and standing right behind me.
“If she does end up going, it’ll be with me.” Axel’s voice was hard, unforgiving, and he moved right beside me. He was my best friend, and because of that he’d always been very protective, almost overbearing at times. But truth was I loved it and wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.
Liam looked at me. “Hey, man.” A moment of silence passed. “You guys, like…” He looked between us. “Dating now or something? That why she’d be going with you?” I could hear in Liam’s voice that he was genuinely curious.
“Like I’m going to let her go to a party with a bunch of sexed-up boxers who have been drinking all night?” Axel lifted a brow and stared Liam down.
Liam held his hand up. “Cool. Well, I’ll see you guys there then?” He didn’t wait for either of us to answer. He headed out the front doors.
I stared at Axel.
“What?”
I was the one to lift a brow now. “Sexed-up?” I chuckled at that and shook my head. “None of these guys would dare put a finger on me.”
I stood and he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me in. I loved the feel of his hard, warm body close to mine, even if it was just in a friendly manner.
“Yeah, but sometimes they like to push, to see if they can get their dick wet.”
I scrunched my nose. “That’s nasty.”
“Unfortunately that’s the truth and how most of these assholes think.”
We headed outside to his SUV. “Are you wanting to go to the party?” I turned and looked at him. He appeared like he wanted to say no, and I knew it was because of what we’d just talked about. “It’ll be fun, and honestly I’d like to get out of the house. My roommate brings her boyfriend over constantly, and I can hear them having sex through my bedroom wall.” I felt my face heat.
I spoke with Axel about anything and everything. Nothing was ever hidden between us. But talking about sex with him—when I knew nothing about it, and because of how I felt toward him—always made me feel on edge.
I could assume Axel knew nothing about sex either, was a virgin just like me since I’d never seen him with any women, but I didn’t want to assume. He was big and strong, attractive and powerful, and I knew the opposite sex wanted him. I saw how they looked at him while he boxed and trained.
“If you really want to hang out there, I’m game.” The way he stared at me, his blue eyes piercing, his focus trained on me, had this chill racing up my spine. “And I hate that you’re staying at her place. You know I still have a room open if you want. It’s yours, always will be.”
As much as the prospect of staying with Axel, living with him under the same roof was oh so appealing, because we were “just friends” I didn’t want to put myself in that situation. And by situation I meant inadvertently walking in on him with a woman in his bed, or hearing him talk to his friends about females, or anything that had to do with the opposite sex.
“I know, and I appreciate it, but you know I like living on my own…kind of.” He smiled at me, and once we were in his SUV and headed to my work, I tried to put any worries I had about me and Axel, and what we did or didn’t have, to the back of my head.
2
Axel
I could hear the thump of the bass before we even parked. The house the party was being held at had two stories and a bit of property around it, but because it was located in a campus housing neighborhood, there were virtually no noise complaints.
“You sure about this?” I asked, glancing at Roxie, seeing her eyeing the house too. We’d gone to a couple of parties together, but the fact all these drunk fuckers would be around, probably trying to hit on her, hell, even look at her, made me want to gouge their eyes out.
“My roommate has her boyfriend over, remember?” She looked at me, this grimace on her face. “He had a bag with him. I think it was condoms and lube, so yeah, I’m sure I’d rather be here.”
Yeah, I didn’t want her around that shit. Hell, if I could have, I’d have thrown her over my shoulder, taken her to my place, and kept her there because I knew she’d be safe.
I stared at her, wanting to just say fuck the party and everything else aside from her, and finally tell her how I felt. I loved her so much, so much that it hurt my heart not to tell her.
Years I’d kept this in, wanting our friendship above all else. The very fact that telling her how I felt could drive her away, scare the shit out of her, had me keeping my mouth shut and just enjoying the hell out of what I had with her.
“Well, hang with me, because even tho
ugh I see these guys daily, who knows who the hell they invited or what drunk ass will try and bother you?”
She smiled at me, her straight white teeth flashing, the dimple in the side of her cheek making an appearance. I felt my heart pick up, my blood rushing through my veins.
If she only knew what she did to me, how beautiful I thought she was…
We got out of the car and headed inside. The music was earsplitting, and the smell of booze, smoke, and sweat filled the air. The party had been going on for a while as it was, what with some people already passed out in the corners, some grinding against each other on the couch, and slurred conversations going on around us.
I held on to Roxie’s hand and felt her glance at me.
“I don’t want you getting lost.”
Getting lost? What the fuck, man? It’s just a two-story house.
Truth was I didn’t want her leaving my side. Yeah, I was overprotective and possessive of her, but there was no going around that. There was no trying to stop myself.
I found a few guys from the gym in the kitchen, most of them seeming sober-ish. We greeted them and started bullshitting. I really didn’t want to be here, would have rather taken Roxie out, maybe dinner or a movie, but she’d seemed like she really wanted to go, so where she went, I did too.
“Robert,” Roxie said, speaking to the guy I was shop talking with. “Where’s the bathroom?”
“Up the stairs, last door on the right.”
She looked at me, and I was ready to take her there myself, but she smiled and shook her head. “Stay. Talk. I’m just going to the bathroom. I’ll be back in five minutes.”