Had he made a huge mistake? Staked too much on that flash of anger on the beach? Only time would tell. When she’d sworn at him, then hit him with that lump of sand, he’d almost wanted to laugh. Not at her, but because it was exactly the kind of thing she would have done when they’d first met. She’d been too subdued, like a black and white version of herself. Even when she’d taken him inside her body, he’d sensed something missing. He wanted his Nee, in all her Technicolor glory, not the pale shadow she’d become.
Perhaps this was just another example of his own selfishness and, in leaving Nee, he’d merely replaced one ultimatum with another. Perhaps now he’d been made aware of it, it would always be with him – a permanent flaw, something he couldn’t change any more than he could stop his hair from being curly. Having turned it over and over in his mind, he still didn’t know for sure, but he wanted to believe that, this time, he’d only had Nee’s best interests at heart. She needed to find her own way to put the past behind her. Getting back together whilst she was still so vulnerable wasn’t the right answer. It might work for a bit, but the business with Devin was too deep a wound for a sticking plaster and it would eventually fester if left unaddressed.
So, he would wait. And try to control the panic and his own need to make everything perfect. It might take her a month, it might take a year, but there was no one else for him, so he would make himself be patient. Crawling under the duvet, he propped the toy rabbit beside his head then reached for his phone to check if there’d been any response to the quick text he’d sent her earlier. Nothing. With a sigh, he tossed it back on the bedside table and rolled onto his side. The empty expanse of mattress beside him seemed to mock him. What if, when all was said and done, Nee decided she needed to put all of her past behind her? Including him.
He punched his pillow in frustration, barely missing poor Mr Bunny in the process. He tucked the rabbit under his arm and closed his eyes. Patience and self-sacrifice might have their limits.
His phone remained stubbornly silent, and though Mr Bunny had done his best, the lack of communication from Nee worried him more than he tried to let on to the others. The snow must have stopped not long after he’d gone to bed, because although the grass and driveway had been completely buried, the happy toot-toot of a horn let them know his parents had managed the short drive from Butterfly Cove without too many problems. Aaron had informed him as he’d sat down for breakfast they were coming to the cottage in a change of plans. He waved off Luke’s attempt at an apology for the disruption as he rose to answer the door. ‘Look, it’s fine. Easier for us not to be lugging a load of the kids’ stuff back and forth every day.’
He might have known Aaron would find the bright side in the situation. He was good at taking things in his stride. A quiet sniff from over by the sink told him he’d have to work much harder to get back in Kiki’s good books. Finishing up his toast, he carried his plate towards the dishwasher next to her, but she was already moving away towards the kitchen door. Deciding to leave it alone for now, he made himself busy tidying up as he listened to the children greeting Brian and Cathy’s arrival with great enthusiasm.
While Kiki urged the children upstairs to swap their pyjamas for warm clothes, his mum and dad followed Aaron back into the kitchen. ‘Want some coffee?’ His brother moved towards the kettle when they nodded, giving Luke a pat on the shoulder as they passed each other.
At least his mum would understand. Luke let the thought bolster him as he bent to accept a hug and a kiss from her. ‘Hello, Mum.’ He pulled out one of the chairs he’d just tucked away for her to sit on. Hanging her padded coat on the back of the seat, she removed the thick, faux-fur band she’d been wearing to keep her ears warm and shook her fingers through her hair to settle it back into perfect waves. She smoothed the front of her thick polo-necked jumper then placed one booted foot on the seat of the chair and stood up on it.
Confused, Luke gaped up at his diminutive mother and was rewarded with a resounding thump on his ear. ‘Ow. What was that for?’ He retreated out of harm’s way whilst Cathy held her hand out to his dad so he could help her down from the chair.
‘What do you think it’s for, you stupid boy? We’ve left the house in chaos. Poor Mia’s beside herself because Nee’s locked herself in her room. Maggie’s escaped with Madeline into Exeter to do some shopping in the sales and George has buried his nose in some incomprehensible textbook. You persuaded us all to go along with your madcap scheme and now you’ve done a runner the moment you hit a bump in the road.’ She plonked herself down in the chair with a huff.
‘Hey, that’s not fair! You were the one who warned me about being too possessive. I haven’t left her, I just backed off a bit to give her some space to breathe.’ He looked to his dad for support, but Brian had pulled a chair up close to his wife and fixed him with a frown.
Cathy slumped back in her chair, a hand raised towards her mouth. ‘Oh, goodness. You did this because of me?’
Luke rubbed the last of the pain from his throbbing ear as he sank down opposite her. ‘No. Not really. But what you said did set me thinking and I realised I’d put her in an impossible situation.’
Aaron served the coffee then took the remaining chair. ‘You might have thought about that before you got us all involved. This is exactly the kind of issue I was trying to avoid with me and Kiki.’
Luke nodded. His brother had almost lost a chance at the wonderful life he now had by being too cautious. To keep everyone else happy, he’d tried to persuade himself that simple friendship between the two of them would be the best option. Luke had done the complete opposite – he’d rushed in all guns blazing. ‘You were trying to do what was right, same as I am now.’
Aaron took a sip of his coffee, then gave a wry laugh. ‘And I was an idiot. Something which clearly runs in the family. You’d better hope and pray forgiveness for it is a trait all the Thorpe women possess, not just mine.’
‘Forgiveness? Nee will understand once she’s had time to think everything through. That’s what I’m trying to give her – time.’
There was sympathy in the smile his brother gave him, but it didn’t do much to lessen the body blow as he gave voice to Luke’s greatest fear. ‘And what if once she’s taken that time to think everything through she decides she’s better off without you?’
Cathy sniffed. ‘And who would blame her after this little stunt of yours? Well, as you’re both idiots, it must come from your father, so it can’t be my fault after all.’ She shoved her chair back as she stood. ‘I’m going to see if Kiki needs a hand.’
‘Hey, what did I do?’ Brian protested towards her retreating back.
Even with a lump on his head and the more uncomfortable knowledge of his father’s disappointment, Luke continued to cling to the conviction that he was doing the right thing, and not only because he didn’t have much option. Nee was where she belonged, safe in Butterfly Cove with her family around her. If only she’d contact him.
Shoving his hands in his pockets, his hand closed over his phone and he resisted the urge to pull it out and check for a message. He’d texted her a couple of times during the day. Nothing too heavy, just that he was thinking of her, then a little anecdote about something that had happened with the kids. Proof he was keeping his promise about not going far, letting her know he was there when she was ready. If she was ready. She’d not responded to any of them.
‘Stop moping about and give me a hand with this, will you?’ Kiki’s sharp tone called his attention away from the back door. His parents and Aaron were still outside in the garden with the children, but he’d come in to change his top after a large snowball, shaped by the children and wielded by his mother, had been shoved down the back of his neck. Making a start on lunch, Kiki had given him a look which made it plain he was still in her bad books. He’d been halfway towards the back door when she’d spoken and he regretted not moving faster.
She’d hardly said two words to him since breakfast. Around the children, sh
e mustered the usual smiles and sweet sense of humour he was used to, but the moment they found themselves alone like this, she either ignored him, or barked instructions. He couldn’t blame her. His presence was causing tension between her and Aaron too, as his brother’s default reaction was to leap to Luke’s defence.
Turning, he saw her stretched up on tiptoes, fumbling for a large bowl on the top shelf in an overhead cupboard. ‘Here, let me.’ He leaned over her and lifted the dish down to her waiting hands.
With a muttered word of thanks, she ducked past him to place it on the board next to her weighing scales. When she turned back to get something else down and huffed at him for being in the way, he held up his hands and retreated to his previous spot by the door. A muffled shout came from the garden and he stared through the glass to see Charlie and Matty racing around in the snow, Tigger bouncing and yapping at their heels. He’d been decidedly unsure about the strange, white stuff on the ground, but secure in a fetching tartan coat (another Christmas gift), the lure of the children playing had been too much for the puppy to resist.
The glass misted from his breath, blurring the scene. He supposed he should go out there, the temperature likely warmer than the chilly atmosphere between him and Kiki, but then he’d have to face another woman who was royally pissed off with him. However cross Kiki might be, she had nothing on his mother, and she was still furious with him. As the snowball down the back had proven.
A musical chime sounded behind him and he was halfway to the table before Kiki had fished her phone out of the pocket on her apron. Angling her hands away from him, she studied her handset, tapped a response and tucked it away again. ‘Did you want something?’
Jesus. Anyone who thought Kiki was the soft, gentle sister should have seen the look she was giving him right then. He had to know, though. Patience be damned. ‘Is she all right?’ he blurted out. ‘That’s all I want someone to tell me. It’s not like I’ve walked out and left her without a word.’
Kiki folded her arms and gave him an appraising look that about blistered the skin from his face. ‘So, is that what this nonsense is all about? What goes around comes around, yeah? She left you and now it’s your turn to get your own back? Coax her with all your promises and declarations of love and then leave her stranded so she knows how you felt when she did it to you? Only you had to go one better and show her up in front of everyone! At least when she did it to you, none of us knew anything about it.’
Horror filled him as every harsh word struck him like a blow. How could she possibly think him capable of that? ‘God, no, Kiki! Punishing Nee is the very last thing on my mind.’
She threw up her hands in a gesture of pure frustration. ‘Then what the hell were you thinking, because I can’t make any sense of your behaviour. You want to know if she’s all right? Well, the answer is no! While you’re skulking around here feeling sorry for yourself, she’s locked herself away in that bloody sitting room upstairs. Mia’s only held back from having Daniel kick the door down because at least she’s eating whatever meals they leave for her outside.’
‘The sitting room?’
‘Yes, the one that’s part of the suite of rooms you were staying in. Won’t say a word to Mimi other than that she’s fine and to please go away.’
Oh. Oh. He had to clutch at the edge of the kitchen board beside him as a wave of euphoric hope washed through him. Light-headed, he let out a little whoop of triumph.
‘What’s got into you? I’ve just told you Nee’s turned herself into a virtual hermit and you think that’s something to celebrate? Oh…’ Kiki’s diatribe broke off as he grabbed her around the waist and span her around. ‘Put me down!’
Aaron opened the back door, letting in a blast of frigid air. ‘What’s all the shouting about? The kids can hear you two. Hey, put her down, Spud! Just because you abandoned your own wife doesn’t mean you can try and steal mine.’
Luke set Kiki down, then planted a kiss on her cheek. ‘Don’t you see what it means? I bought her a load of art supplies and set them up in the sitting room. Part of my stupid masterplan to fix everything. If she’s locked herself away in there…’
Understanding dawned on her face and Kiki flung her arms around him. ‘Then maybe she’s painting again? Oh, Luke!’ He clung to her, knowing it was too soon to be celebrating, that they could be jumping to conclusions, but damn it, it was Christmas and he was going to believe in miracles. The muscles in his face ached from how hard he was grinning, but nothing could dampen his mood. Not even when Aaron grabbed him in a headlock and dragged him outside before shoving him headfirst into a pile of snow that had been swept off the path. Abandoning the very wonky Olaf-shaped snowman they’d been building, the children rushed over and jumped on top of him, driving him further into the freezing mound. He held out his hand to his dad to get a lift up, and Brian obliged, but only lifting him far enough to give his mum access to shove another fistful of snow down his neck. ‘Bloody hell!’ He fell back on his backside with a thump.
‘Language!’ Brian folded his arms with a tut.
‘Language!’ Matty parroted, copying his Granddad’s exact tone and actions, which sent Charlie off into a paroxysm of giggles. Living up to his name, Tigger bounced over and jumped up to lick a trickle of melted snow from his cheek.
A snowball caught him on the side of the head, and a second, smaller, one on his chest, sending the puppy running in retreat. The five of them formed a semicircle around him, all with more snowy projectiles in hand and still he couldn’t stop grinning. Knowing when he was defeated, Luke dropped onto his back in the snow and accepted the freezing onslaught.
Changing his top had been a complete waste of time.
Thankfully, the one-sided snowball fight relieved a lot of the tension between himself and the rest of the family so the rest of the day proved a much more relaxing affair. The forecast had threatened a sharp freeze and more snow overnight, so his parents headed back to Mia’s before dark in case the roads became too tricky. Charlie had rewarded his efforts in building her a snowman with permission to use her special-edition Frozen bubble bath, which had done wonders to soak the chill from his bones – even if it had left him smelling of strawberries.
After a light supper, he’d even talked Kiki into agreeing to one of his favourite treats as a kid and the five of them were camped out on the living-room floor in a huge bed made from the quilts and pillows they’d dragged downstairs. It wasn’t even seven o’clock and the children were already heavy-lidded as they watched a stop-motion cartoon about Santa’s reindeer. Propped up on the far side of the temporary bed, Luke finally understood something that had escaped him before.
His mum had made it seem like a treat because of the apparent effort it had taken to talk her into it. Quilts had normally only been allowed downstairs if either he or Aaron had been unwell. In reality, they’d always ended up so relaxed and sleepy, an early night had inevitably followed, leaving his mum and dad to enjoy a quiet evening. He offered a silent salute to her for being so sneaky.
By the end of the cartoon, sweat was popping on his brow. He kicked the mountain of covers off his legs and sat up – too quickly from the way the room swam before his eyes. It was too hot, he needed a cold drink, something to ease the ache in his throat. He got halfway to his knees before deciding it might be too much effort.
Aaron sat up with a frown. ‘All right, Spud? You look a bit peaky.’
‘He looks like Robbie,’ Charlie piped up.
‘Robbie? What are you talking about, poppet?’ Aaron wavered, then split into two before his eyes, which was one hell of a party trick.
‘The reindeer, from the telly. Uncle Luke’s got a red nose, just like him.’ A huge sneeze rocked Luke’s frame, drowning out whatever response his brother might have made.
Chapter Eighteen
Daniel swung the axe, splitting another section of log in two. He’d become quite adept at it over the past few days, as the ever-growing stack of firewood in the little shed beh
ind him attested to. It was chop wood, or find someone to shout at, and as it was supposed to be the season of goodwill to all men, the poor log pile was taking the brunt of his frustrations. Nothing was going as they’d planned it. He’d wanted their first Christmas at Butterfly Cove to be perfect, had been so excited at the thought of a real family holiday with everyone they loved around them, and it had lasted all of two days before falling apart.
It didn’t help that Mia was sick, and although he knew it was often part and parcel of being pregnant, he felt so bloody useless every time she made a dash for the bathroom. She’d told him having him hovering around her made it worse, so here he was again, making more firewood than they could possibly use even if the cold weather stayed put until next Christmas. A drop of sweat trickled down his brow and into his eye, and he thunked the axe into the log with a curse and swiped the sting away.
‘Safe to approach?’ Shielding his eyes from the sun, Daniel turned towards Richard, who was standing some six feet away, a steaming mug gripped in each hand.
‘Yeah. Sorry, just needed to get out of the house for a bit.’ He pulled off the thick, protective gloves he was wearing and tucked them in his coat pocket. The smell of fresh coffee hit his nose and he raised the mug to take a quick sip. Rich, strong and almost too hot to be comfortable – in other words, perfect. He gulped another mouthful and let out a sigh of satisfaction. ‘Cheers. I needed this.’
‘Thought you might. Madeline and Maggie are already discussing the decorations for New Year’s Eve so I decided to escape before they roped me in.’
The party was still three days away, but there would no doubt be a list of things for them both to do as soon as he set foot back inside. Normally, his Mia would have been in the thick of it, clutching her journal full of ideas and pictures she’d clipped from magazines, but this blasted business with Luke and Nee had her camped out on the landing half the bloody time – when she wasn’t being sick, that is. ‘Mia still upstairs?’
Christmas at Butterfly Cove Page 18