by Mindi Scott
Mikey gave me a wave while Jared and Daniel climbed out. Then he drove off, leaving the four of us in the driveway.
The light on our porch was bright enough to show the surprise on Jared’s and Daniel’s faces. “You two going to a dance or something?” Jared asked.
I would have thought it was obvious from our clothes. I mean, I was just wearing black pants and a button-down shirt Kendall had forced on me, but it was still a big step up from ripped jeans.
“It’s homecoming,” Kendall said, hooking her arm carefully through mine as though she didn’t want to squish the flower thing on her wrist that she’d bought for herself. “Seth asked me to be his date at the last minute.”
I glanced at her, trying to try to figure out why she’d said that, but she seemed to be making a big effort not to make eye contact with me.
“Oh Jesus,” Daniel said, laughing. “Dick sure is getting good at doing weird and unexpected shit lately, isn’t he?”
“I don’t exactly take ‘weird and unexpected’ as a compliment,” Kendall said.
“You’re right,” he said, checking her out. “What I should have said is that he’s lucky you were free. You’re looking hot tonight, Eckman.”
Kendall did look good, all done up like some glamorous old-time film actress in a slinky red dress. She’d changed her hair again, and it was the first time since freshman year that I’d seen her with her natural dark brown color. During her on-again/off-again thing with Isaac, her hair had always been Marilyn Monroe blond.
Jared lit a cigarette and smirked at Kendall. “What kind of blackmail did my loser brother have to use to get you to go out with him?”
“Ha-ha,” I said.
I was really ready to leave now. But then Kendall made things worse by starting to laugh for real. “No blackmail. Just lots of begging. Right, Seth?” she said, elbowing me.
I moved away from her. “Yeah, right.”
Daniel was still looking at Kendall. “You should come see me after the dance.”
She raised her eyebrows. “You should keep dreaming.”
“Every night, Eckman,” he said. “Every night.”
I expected Kendall to snark at him, but she just rolled her eyes and headed for the Mustang. I followed and climbed into the driver’s side, leaving her to open her own damn door. This wasn’t a real date, even if she was suddenly faking like it was.
7:31 P.M.
I managed to keep my mouth shut until after I’d backed out of the driveway. Then I turned to Kendall. “You didn’t say anything about this acting shit. And you definitely didn’t say you’d be trying to make it sound like I’m desperate for you.”
She reached over and patted my arm. “Yes, I did. And you had to have known that I wasn’t going to let anyone think I was the pathetic one here.”
“Would it have been so pathetic for you to just say that you asked me because we’re nonenemies or whatever?”
“Yes!”
I pulled out onto the main road, and Kendall started messing with the stereo. It drove me crazy when people changed the music in my car—especially without asking—but I didn’t bother saying anything. It wasn’t like she was going to stop, anyway.
“Why do you care so much that I told them you asked me?” she asked, still scanning through radio stations. “Are you that embarrassed to be seen with me?”
One thing you could say about Kendall: the girl never had a problem coming up with ways to make me sound like the jerk in any given situation.
“I don’t want anyone getting the idea that I’m trying to get with Isaac’s ex-girlfriend.”
She left it on some hip-hop crap. Typical.
“Isn’t it about time you stopped thinking of me in relation to Isaac all the time?” she asked in a sad-sounding voice. “Isaac and I first got together a year and a half ago, but you knew me a decade and a half before that. To me, you’re not Isaac’s friend. You’re my former neighbor and nonenemy. Can’t I be those things to you?”
Kendall did have a point; we’d known each other practically since we were born, and Isaac hadn’t moved to town until sixth grade. Changing my thinking wasn’t as simple as she made it sound, though. “We can’t go backward just because Isaac isn’t around anymore,” I said. “If he were alive, I know you wouldn’t be in this car hanging out as my former-neighbor/nonenemy right now. You’d have found some other guy to help you make your secret boyfriend jealous or—more likely—you’d be back with Isaac and heading to this dance with him.”
“You’re wrong about that last part,” she said, shaking her head. “When I broke up with him, it was for good.”
I couldn’t tell if she believed that or if it was another lie she was telling herself. But Isaac hadn’t believed it.
“Quit looking so skeptical,” Kendall said. “Isaac cheated on me a bunch of times, which I’m sure you know. With one of my so-called friends, even. I kept taking him back, but the last time it happened, I was so exhausted and pissed off that I decided I couldn’t do it again. And that was it.”
This was the first I’d heard about Isaac cheating. “But you messed around with Daniel before that, right?”
She sighed. “No. When the Daniel thing happened, Isaac and I had just broken up for the third time because I’d found out about him and some girl at a party.”
It sounded like their relationship had been way more screwed up than I’d ever known.
“So was Daniel your way of getting back at him?”
“You can call it that if you want,” she said, shrugging. “I think of it more as me trying to move on and get over Isaac. Which was the whole reason I went to that party in the first place—to hook up with Daniel.”
The idea that Kendall had preplanned hooking up with Daniel floored me. Daniel was into Kendall in the same way that he was into all hot chicks, but Kendall walking away from him in my driveway was a classic example of how nonseriously she seemed to take him. “How did that even happen?” I asked. “I mean, why Daniel?”
She covered her face and laughed a little, like she couldn’t believe we were having this conversation. “Okay, this isn’t going to make me sound honorable, but I guess part of it was because I was thinking I wouldn’t mind if it got back to Isaac so he could feel what I was feeling. And since I was rebounding—and Daniel is rebound guy—I thought I’d see if it was true what everyone says about him, you know, having all the moves down. As it turns out, he totally does. So, yeah. Um. That’s why Daniel.”
I stared at the taillights in front of me, feeling anxious all of a sudden. If Kendall could talk about what sex had been like with Daniel, what was she telling people about me? What was there to tell?
While I was trying to figure out whether I wanted to know, Kendall started talking again. Calmer now. “You probably don’t believe me, but I want you to know that I honestly thought Isaac and I were over when everything happened with Daniel. I’m not a cheater.”
I waited a few seconds before saying, “I believe you.”
The thing was . . . it seemed like she really was telling the truth. I just had no clue how I could have had things so mixed up.
I turned into the school lot—which was about half-full—and pulled into the first empty space. Kendall switched on the dome light and flipped the visor down to look in the tiny mirror. “I’m glad I finally got to tell you my side,” she said as she touched up her lipstick. “Thanks for listening.”
“What else was I going to do? I’m trapped in a car with you.”
She laughed and punched my arm. “Prick.”
Peaceful times between us had been rare, and I didn’t know when the next would be coming. So I decided to just throw the subject out there. “I’ve been wondering about that night. You know, when I played my last show with the Real McCoys?”
She stopped puckering her lips at herself but didn’t take her eyes off the mirror. “What about it?”
“Well, all I remember is getting wasted and then waking up next to you. You’re
the only one who knows what went on during the hours in between. I kind of want to know how it happened. I mean, not a play-by-play. Just the basics.”
“There’s honestly not much of a play-by-play to relay for you.”
“Meaning what?” I asked hopefully. “Nothing really happened?”
Kendall closed her eyes for a long second, and then turned to face me. “Is right now really the best time for us to relive this?”
Shit. Now it was obvious what she’d been getting at. “Not much of a play-by-play” equaled one miserable play.
My face got hot. Actually, I was warm all over. And, God, was I ever wishing I’d kept my mouth shut. “That bad, huh?”
I tried to laugh it off, but I sounded like almost as big of a loser as I felt.
Kendall shook her head. “It’s just—”
I cut her off. “You don’t have to tell me,” I said, talking fast. “I’m sorry if it sucked for you. I was trashed and it was my first time. Not that I’m trying to make excuses. But I thought you should know. In case you want to cut me a break if you ever tell anyone about it?”
So pathetic.
Silence.
Kendall stared at me, her eyes open wide. “Wait a second. So you’re telling me you’d never been with a girl before?”
“No. Not all the way.”
“Oh!”
She was surprised. Which was . . . maybe an okay sign. I don’t know.
“So what about after that night?” she asked.
I didn’t see how that was any of her business, but I told her anyway. “No.”
A slow smile spread across her face. “Wow, Seth. That has to be the sweetest, most adorable thing I’ve ever heard.”
I looked away. “Shut up.”
She pushed the visor back up and shifted in her seat. “I’m serious,” she said, leaning close to me. “You’re in a band, and you have that ‘wrong side of the tracks’ thing going that the good girls love. I always figured you were getting action all the time. Just, you know, more discreetly than your friends.”
“Okay. But weren’t you just saying it wasn’t . . . decent?”
She shook her head.
“So you really had no idea, then?”
“None,” she said.
Relief. And then I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “Are you ready to go to this stupid dance now or what?”
She raised her eyebrows like she wasn’t sure how she felt about the abrupt end to the conversation, but then she smiled. “If you’re going to get your ass out of the car and open my door like a gentleman this time, then yes, I am.”
“I can do that.”
8:32 P.M.
“You better not have been making a dumb face just now or I’ll kill you,” Kendall said two seconds after the photographer’s camera flashed. “I’m going to be cherishing these pictures for the rest of my life, you know.”
“Oh, me too,” I said. “Me too.”
She laughed and pulled me away from the backdrop. For almost an hour now, she’d been dragging me all around the gym, which looked about the same as always, except for the dimmed lights and the homecoming banners. She wanted to make sure her secret boyfriend saw us together in every possible place, I think. My face was aching from all the fake smiling, and she’d been holding on to me so tightly while we walked that I’d almost forgotten what it felt like not having her left boob mashed against my upper arm. Making her guy jealous—whoever he was—was exhausting work.
“Where are we off to now?” I asked.
Kendall flashed a beauty-pageant smile. “Does it matter, darling?”
I sighed. “Well, I’m getting kind of tired of walking around. Maybe we can sit down and chill for a while?”
I’d been keeping up my end of the bargain, acting all cozy with Kendall and complimenting her every chance I got while she paraded me from group to group. Maybe some people would have been entertained watching Kendall put on this show, but I was wishing like hell not to be a part of it. Especially since it was putting a big crimp in my plan to surprise Rosetta. I still hadn’t been able to spot her—and believe me, I’d been looking—but I was getting paranoid that she might have noticed all this close contact going on with Kendall and me and was getting the wrong idea.
“I think we’ll dance now,” Kendall said, letting go of my arm just long enough to grab my hand and tug me toward the dance floor.
I was about to make a smart remark about how I’d thought she’d never ask, but Pete Zimmer chose that moment to stroll up in all his football-god glory and block our way. The smell coming off him was like beer cologne. I have to admit, right then I probably would have just about killed for a drink or two . . . or seven.
“You look good, Kendall,” Pete said in a low voice.
Kendall smiled and somehow managed to snuggle against me even closer than before. “Thank you.”
“No,” he said, looking her up and down slowly. “I mean, you look really good.”
Kendall giggled. “Again, thank you. I am having such an amazing time with Seth tonight. Do you know Seth McCoy? He’s in a band.”
She was so weird. Of course he knew me; we’d been going to school together all our lives.
Pete acknowledged me with a nod and then went back to staring at Kendall’s cleavage. If Kendall had been my girlfriend and he was pulling this shit, I’d have wanted to kick his ass. But I remembered having seen them together at his party at the end of summer, and I started figuring out what was going on here. She was his girl, even though he got his kicks by refusing to go out with her in public.
“Vicki isn’t having fun,” he said. “I can’t figure out why, and she isn’t telling.”
Vicki was the girl Pete had brought to the dance so no one would know he was secretly screwing Kendall. It was all coming together.
Kendall’s smile didn’t slip. “That sucks.”
I got the feeling Kendall’s plan was going to pay off in about thirty seconds: Pete would be ditching Vicki; Kendall would be ditching me. All as it should have been.
While I waited for it, I went back to scanning the area for Rosetta and Carr. Still no luck. Maybe Rosetta hadn’t been able to figure out a way to avoid the Rolls-Royce and had to pretend to be sick at the last minute? This was the first time in my life I’d ever been disappointed not to see Carr.
Then a strange thing happened. Kendall didn’t let go of me. She didn’t disappear with Pete. Instead, she elbowed me in the ribs. My cue to say my thing.
Caught off guard, I looked at Kendall.
She stared back at me.
And then there was that elbow again.
I cleared my throat and said, “I’m really stoked that Kendall came to this dance with me. She’s one of the sexiest chicks here.”
Kendall’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly.
“Uh. Yeah.” Pete looked at his feet. “I’d better get back.”
And just like that, he was shuffling away.
Kendall turned to me, frowning. “Thanks a lot. That was your most uninspired performance yet. Even as drunk as he is, he still noticed that you sounded like you were reading from a cue card.”
“Sorry.”
But, really, I wasn’t.
It was hitting me just how ridiculous this whole deal was. In the car Kendall had talked about what a bad boyfriend Isaac had been, but what she had going on now was just as screwed up. All this stupid drama. And for what exactly?
A couple of Kendall’s friends walked by right then, so she turned the smile back on for them and kept it going even as she looked at me. “Do not flake out on me, Seth. I’m paying you to help me sell this. Remember?”
9:27 P.M.
Kendall and I were right in the thick of things on the dance floor, and she was going crazy bouncing around with the crowd to a rowdy old country song that even all noncountry fans know. I’m not much into dancing—especially not while sober—but I was faking it to keep her happy. It seemed to be working too. Her cheeks were pink, her eye
s were bright, and her smile might even have been real.
“If you weren’t with me, who would you have wanted to come to this dance with?” she asked.
Yeah, she was all about the nosy questioning too.
“No one, remember? And I would have been fine with it.”
The DJ switched to another slow song, and I silently cursed him. So boring. I moved in close and put my arms around Kendall’s waist while she wrapped hers around my neck. One thing was for sure, I was getting good at going through the motions while feeling absolutely nothing.
“I know you weren’t planning to go,” she said. “Let’s put it like this: If you had to ask someone and were guaranteed a yes, who would you have chosen?”
I shrugged, even though I did have one person in mind, of course. “Why are you asking me this?”
“No real reason,” Kendall said, propping her chin on my shoulder. “It’s just that there’s a girl who keeps staring at you, and I think she’s your soul mate. I’m sensing that you’re going to fall in love and it’s going to be romantic and intense. Probably tragic, too, but it will be worth it because it will change your lives forever.”
“You’re sensing all that because some girl looked at me a few times?”
She lifted her head and grinned. “Yes.”
I couldn’t help laughing. “You are one strange chick, you know that?”
“I’m going to assume that what you meant to say is that I’m nice to watch out for my nonenemy like this,” she said, patting my cheek. “Here, let’s rotate slowly so you can look at her. But don’t be obvious about it like you always are. Be cool. Be casual.”
We kept doing our slow-dance swaying, then Kendall started leading me into a turn. A very, very slow turn. Cool and casual, that was me.
“Who am I supposed to be looking at?”
“We’re not there yet,” Kendall said as we moved what felt like only a fraction of an inch at a time. “Okay. This should be right. Straight ahead of you, way over at the edge of the dance floor. Under the clock?”
In that second, I forgot all about this soul mate joke. Because, after looking all night for Rosetta, there she was. She had on a strapless silvery-blue dress and her black hair was hanging loose in thick waves. There must have been twenty feet and more than twenty people directly between us, but she was looking so beautiful over there that I could hardly breathe over here.