Stay with Me

by Jules Bennett

  No excuses.

  There were some minor repairs from the storm that needed his attention and this would be the perfect time for Livie to get her hands a little dirty and learn that he didn’t do games. He didn’t appreciate her racing from his house, he didn’t appreciate her pawning off the latest info onto her friend, and he sure as hell didn’t appreciate how he was so torn up over her. She’d been in Haven such a short time and had this hold over him he wasn’t used to.

  Whatever was going on between them wasn’t like what he’d had with his ex-wife. Their relationship had been fiery passion and built on sex. They’d married on a whim and he’d gone overseas. When he’d come home, they’d pick up their affair where they’d left off. One time on leave had produced Piper and that’s when Carly decided family wasn’t for her at all.

  Hell, he hadn’t thought it had been for him, either, but there was no way he was going to just walk away from responsibilities . . . especially an innocent child.

  His cell vibrated in his hand and he assumed it was Livie coming up with some excuse as to why she couldn’t meet him. But he instantly smiled when he glanced to the screen. He opened the picture that had come in from the sitter. Piper was sitting on the kitchen island at the sitter’s house and she had her hands in some dough and the biggest grin.

  Making biscuits from scratch.

  Yeah. This child of his was his entire world and he’d give up his military career again in a heartbeat. While he’d always wanted to continue on in the air force, some things were just not meant to be. He’d had several good years with them, but he had even better years being Piper’s father.

  Jax spun the chair around to the desk along the wall behind him. The invoices spread across the space hadn’t disappeared like he’d hoped. There was so much behind the scenes that most people never considered for this small-town airport. But he was doing the best he could to keep everything running just as smoothly as when Paul was alive.

  Jax reached over to fire up the computer just as the office door slammed open. Throwing a look over his shoulder it was all he could do not to burst out laughing.

  “You really take old clothes to heart,” he stated, glancing over Livie in her mussed state.

  “You told me to get over here, so here I am.” She slammed the door at her back. “What do you want?”

  Oh, that timeless loaded question. For now, though, he opted to remain serious.

  He motioned to her neck. “You have paint on your hickey.”

  Obviously, that serious state didn’t last long. But he couldn’t help himself. She had a pale gray slash on her neck, covering his mark—he was sure there was some metaphor about trying to mask their intimacy to the world, but he was too emotionally drained to try to figure it all out.

  She also sported some hairstyle that he’d never seen on her and he sure as hell wasn’t about to comment on that . . . whatever that pile of blond was on top of her head. Random pieces framed her face, and the matching shade covering her hickey was splattered all over her shirt and shorts.

  “What. Do. You. Want.” Each word came through gritted teeth and Jax circled his desk, slow as he pleased. Apparently, she wasn’t in the mood. Ironically, he was.

  “What are you painting?” he asked as he propped a hip on the edge of his desk.

  “My bedroom. I need to get these projects done before Friday.”

  Intrigued, he tipped his head. “What’s Friday?”

  “I have to head back to Atlanta for work that morning. I just want some sense of accomplishment and moving forward with Dad’s house.” She let out a sigh and dropped her arms to her sides. “There’s an important meeting Friday. I can’t miss it, and if the CEO decides to go ahead and announce the promotion, I want to know that I am one step closer to putting my house on the market.”

  She was going back to work in a few days, a fact she hadn’t mentioned one time to him before or after their intimacy. The pushing toward putting her childhood home on the market didn’t sit any better with him. Even though they’d been intimate, and they’d spent time together and gotten to know each other on a level deeper than he’d thought possible, she still kept him at a distance. That personal life of hers remained just that and she never once offered a glimpse into her future.

  Clearly, he knew where he fell in her life.

  Whatever Jax thought they might be developing . . . well, it was completely one-sided. He’d do well to remember the original vow he’d made to himself about getting emotionally involved with a woman who never intended to stick. He’d more than learned his lesson . . . or so he’d thought.

  Something about Livie had seemed so different, though. Even when she spouted over and over how she was leaving, he always got the sense she was reminding herself and not actually talking to him. Their intimacy was so much more than he’d ever had before . . . how could his feelings be so strong when she didn’t share them?

  Or maybe she did and that’s what had her running scared. She was most likely terrified because she hadn’t expected all of this between them, but neither had he and he’d be damned if he was going to ignore it. He wanted to know her full feelings before she left town. If she wasn’t going to volunteer the information, he would get it from her one way or another.

  “We’ve got some damage on the roof of the hangar from the storm,” he told her, pushing his thoughts aside. If she could ignore her true emotions, then he’d damn well do the same . . . for now. “We’re going to fix it.”

  She let out an unladylike snort. “You sent me an emergency text for that? You’re dreaming if you think I can climb up on a roof and fix anything. Call Zach. He’ll fix it.”

  Livie spun around, obviously ready to head out the door, but he was faster. Jax jumped up and in front of her, blocking her escape. Her eyes widened as she stared up at him.

  “Get out of my way so I can get back to painting. I left Melanie and Jade arguing over the way the tape was being applied around the crown molding in the dining room.”

  Without thinking twice, he reached out and raked the pad of his thumb over her neck. “You put paint here on purpose.”

  She swatted him away. “I’m a messy painter.”

  “You didn’t want anyone to see.” He muttered the words as he placed both hands on her shoulders and stepped into her. “If you’re that ashamed of what we have, why did you stay last night?”

  Her eyes darted away. “It was storming.”

  “That’s a lame excuse. Do you need more time to come up with another?”

  She shot him the side-eye glare. “I need to get back to my dad’s house.”

  “Your house,” he corrected. “Paul is gone and the place is yours.”

  “Legally, but that hasn’t been my home since I left at eighteen.”

  Something was bothering her, something beyond them and beyond the painting and rush to return. There was a sadness in her eyes and now that he looked closer, there was a little bit of redness to them as well.

  “You’ve been crying.”

  Livie drew her brows in. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

  “Why do you lie to me?” he demanded, dropping his hands and taking a step back. “You think I can’t tell you’re terrified of your feelings when it comes to me, to my daughter? You weren’t expecting us, were you? Now you’re in a rush to get back to work, to get that precious promotion, but you’re getting too involved here and you don’t want to admit it.”

  She said nothing as she kept her gaze averted to the floor between them. Jax raked a hand over his stubbled jawline and willed himself to be patient toward this most frustrating woman. She was hurting and obviously didn’t know how to deal with the pain. He knew a thing or two about wounds, but even if he didn’t, he wasn’t about to let her feel alone.

  “What happened today, Livie?”

  She shook her head, still not meeting his eyes.

  “What happened?” he pressed.

  With tears filling her eyes, she lifted her head. “Tell me how s
ick my dad was when we left.”

  The topic was bound to be brought up and he wasn’t about to lie. “He wasn’t terminal, but he did have cancer. He beat it and lived years in remission.”

  Livie blinked away the moisture. “Did you know he kept a journal? I found it with pictures in a decorative box under his nightstand.”

  “No, I wasn’t aware of a journal.”

  That didn’t surprise Jax. Paul was big on not keeping feelings bottled up. Perhaps if Livie had stayed, being more open would’ve been a trait she would’ve continued to learn from her father.

  “He had so much planned for this place, for you.” She glanced away again and whispered, “For me.”

  It was a wonder she got any painting done at all if she’d spent the morning reading her father’s thoughts. Jax would love to see this journal, and he believed he had the right, but now was not the time to ask.

  “More than once he mentioned what he’d do if he had the money.” Livie toyed with the frayed hem of her old T-shirt. “He wanted to repair everything and add in a little restaurant. He didn’t want anything grand or over-the-top. He just wanted to continue to serve the community.”

  Livie pulled in a shaky breath and scratched her cheek, resting her open palm on the side of her face as she continued to stare aimlessly. “Jade came into the room as I was reading and told me about Zach’s quote for the renovations so I just gave her your number. I didn’t want to talk to you or anyone else, really. I just wanted to read.”

  And now he felt like an ass for being so angry with her earlier. She hadn’t been running, at least not that time. She’d been reading and reconnecting with her father in the only way possible now. She’d most likely been feeling guilt for not being here and for losing him suddenly.

  “Then I got your text and came right over.”

  Jax leaned back against the door and shoved his hands in his pockets. This tiny office seemed to be closing in on them and all of these feelings. Too many feelings that neither of them knew what the hell to do with. They’d both steamrolled right into unchartered territory and they were floundering through it together.

  Well, he was floundering around. Livie had a pretty clear picture of what she wanted for her future . . . and he wasn’t in it.

  The thought squeezed at his chest like a vise and he hated that he’d lost control over his plans and his life. There was so much he wanted, so much that seemed within reach, but in reality all of this was totally temporary.

  Clearing his throat, Jax pushed aside those emotions. She wasn’t ready to face them and he wasn’t going to press her. He had to remind himself she was dealing with much more than just him. She was going through Paul’s things, trying to get her house on the market, vying for a top spot at her firm . . . and he was purposely trying to make her realize what she had here.

  But this wasn’t her home. Haven hadn’t been hers for some time now. Just because he loved it here, because he wanted to keep his roots firmly planted, didn’t mean she did.

  “Listen, I do need your help.”

  He held his hands up, palms out, when she opened her mouth. No doubt she was about to protest, but he wasn’t having it and he wasn’t letting her leave so soon.

  “You can hold the ladder and the tools if you want, but I am not calling someone in when I’m sure it’s something I can do myself,” he explained.

  Livie pursed her lips together and finally nodded. “Fine. But I do have to get back to paint.”

  Jax smiled. “You give me an hour and I’ll come help you paint.”

  “Where’s Piper today?”

  “She’s at the sitter’s. I’ll get her later and then we’ll come over. Surely one of you ladies can keep her entertained while I work.”

  Livie rubbed her hands over her damp cheeks, then glanced to the paint splotches on her hands. “I’m such a disaster,” she groaned. “I don’t even recognize myself. I don’t know how to paint without making a mess.”

  “Honestly, I’m impressed you were painting at all. Figured you would try to hire that out.”

  With a swat across his chest, Livie let out a slight laugh. “I’m offended. Just because I appreciate nice things and I prefer to wear heels instead of tennis shoes doesn’t mean I don’t know how to do manual labor. I’m still Paul Daniels’s daughter.”

  Which was both a curse and a blessing at the moment. If she were anyone else, he may not have had that initial physical reaction to her. But, if she were anyone else, she wouldn’t be here.

  Paul Daniels’s daughter. The woman who had sparked his interest since he was too young to even know what to do with a woman. But he knew now. He knew exactly what to do with Livie and she knew exactly what to do with him to drive him out of his ever-loving mind.

  He couldn’t start down that path or he’d make use of this empty office and clear that desk with one swipe of his arm.

  “Let’s get this over with.” Jax turned and opened the office door, gesturing for her to go on ahead. “I have a guy coming in this afternoon to set up some flights for work. He has several over the next couple of months, so I hope we are still up and running during renovations . . . if that even happens.”

  “Oh, it will happen,” she stated as she marched by him. Those little shorts did nothing to keep his mind in the professional territory and had him seriously reconsidering cleaning off that desk. “We’re a step closer every day and Melanie is determined. She’s one sharp attorney and between her and Jade, they won’t let us down.”

  “Is there an us?”

  Damn it. Did that question seriously just pop out of his mouth? What was he thinking? He didn’t need her to affirm or deny anything. Unfortunately, the words were out and from Livie’s rigid stance, she was just as shocked at his question.

  “Jax—”

  “Forget it.” He cut her off. Why make this even more uncomfortable than he’d already made it? “We’ll get this metal roofing back in place and then you can be on your way.”

  Livie glanced over her shoulder, her eyes swirling with both desire and pain. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  Jax shrugged. “I’m not going to get hurt, Livie. Besides, I’ve been through quite a bit before you came to town. I can handle being roughed up.”

  She turned fully to face him. “Which is why I don’t want to lead you on or pretend this is some happily-ever-after we’re going to have. I’m not staying. I’m here for the airport and I’m here to get the house sold. I mean, I’ll come back every now and then since this is my investment, too, but it won’t be often.”

  “Are you telling yourself that or are you trying to convince me? Because, baby, that wasn’t very convincing.”

  Her eyes narrowed. Obviously, he’d hit a nerve. Good. She’d hit all of his for some time now.

  “I’m well aware of my goals,” she countered. “You just need to remember what we’re doing. We’re going to renovate Dad’s airport so you can keep it running. But on a personal level, we should probably keep things light from here on out to avoid a messy ending.”

  Jax stared at her for a half second before he closed the gap between them and curled his fingers around her shoulders. “You are delusional if you think this ending won’t be messy. You can lie to me, you can even sidetrack me for a bit, but don’t fool yourself.”

  She attempted to step back, but he tightened his hold. “You cannot brush me off that quick. Last night clearly scared you to death, but don’t think for one second that it didn’t affect me. I’ve never let anyone in my life since my wife left me. But you’re here and Piper is over the moon about you.”

  No need to state his own feelings. They were too complex, especially compared to that of a toddler.

  “So if you don’t want a messy ending, then you sure as hell better go back to Atlanta now and leave this up to me,” he warned. “Because I’m not done with you and I’m not letting you just casually throw out that little speech about being the end of the road.”

  Jax released her and he
aded to the storage area with his tools and ladders. He wasn’t going to say any more on the subject. He’d said enough. At this point, Livie could decide what to do, what to say, and how to approach their personal relationship.

  Legally, they were bound, so she couldn’t run too far, but he wanted more. Damn it all. He wanted her and having her spend the night and play shadow puppets with his daughter to get through the storm had been the final piece linking his heart to hers.

  Frustrated with himself for allowing these feelings to creep up again, Jax jerked on the storage room door, sending it clanging back against the wall. There was no one to be angry with other than himself. But the relationship he’d had with his wife was nothing like this.

  Jax knew Livie. He knew her well, even though time and an age gap stood between them. He still got her, something he never truly had with his ex.

  Perhaps that was the crux of the whole situation. This was new territory and he didn’t like it. He didn’t know how to handle it and he didn’t have a game plan.

  “Do you want me to go?”

  As he stood in the doorway staring at the various tools, Livie’s soft, questioning tone came from right behind him.

  That he could answer with one hundred percent certainty. “I don’t want you to go.”

  Propping his hands on his hips, he dropped his head between his shoulders and blew out a sigh. “I want to get this roof fixed, finish my day, and get your painting done. Other than that, I don’t have the emotional energy for much else.”

  “You’re hurting,” she whispered.

  When he turned around all he saw was those red-rimmed eyes and a vulnerable woman staring back at him. He closed the distance between them, framed her face, and tilted her head back.

  “So are you,” he whispered as he rested his forehead against hers.

  Now what? They were at an impasse. She wasn’t about to let him heal her, but Jax refused to let her go through this alone. She’d been alone for far too long. Whether she liked it or not, he was going to make sure she knew how much he cared.