Shattered Souls (To Love and Serve Book 1)

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Shattered Souls (To Love and Serve Book 1) Page 12

by Alison Mello

She laughs. “Oh, you sweet boy. I am far too young to be a ma’am. You can call me Lexi.”

  He blushes. “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Lexi, Julian is looking for some insight on military life. He’s thinking about joining the Army after he graduates.”

  Julian explains that he wants to be an MP so if he decides not to make a career out of the service he can be a cop when he gets out. I nearly died when he tells me he wants to help kids the way Keegan has helped him. “Besides, I made a promise to Officer Ward that I would pull my life together, and this is probably the best way to do it.”

  “I can agree with that.” I nod.

  “Julian, we have to do our first class, bud.”

  “Excuse me.” Julian follows Keegan. He picks up a bin filled with bags and walks it over to the side of the school. It makes me so happy to see Keegan in his element. He’s great with the kids, squatting down to their level. These kids are so young and impressionable, he’s smart to start working with them now. I decide it’s time for me to wander around to check out the crafts, and use my tickets.

  Looking at all these tables makes me think of Bailey. She was young but her mom had her late in life, and she would tell me stories about how her mom taught her how to crochet, and they would sit and talk for hours about life while they made things for their local craft shows. I chuckle thinking about her words, ‘It was never my favorite thing to do, but Mama loved that I did it with her. The woman would talk my ear off.’ I bet she’d give anything to be talking her ear off at this very moment.

  By the time I’m done looking at all the craft tables and listening to everyone tell me about what they do, the guys are done with their first class, and Keegan catches up with me by the ticket table. “I have a break. Want to grab some lunch?”

  “Sure.” He takes my hand and the three of us walk over to get into line for the food. It’s still somewhat early so the line isn’t too long. They have a huge grill set up and it’s loaded with burgers, dogs, and sausages.

  “Julian, do you want a burger?” Keegan asks him. He’s suddenly shy and shrugs.

  Keegan ignores it and tells the lady at the table he needs four burgers, three bags of chips, and three bottles of water. He instructs her to put two burgers on one plate. In a matter of minutes they’re serving up the food. Keegan hands Julian the plate with two burgers on it and we walk to the end of the table where they have condiments and napkins. Keegan walks us over to the D.A.R.E. car, pulls out a blanket, and the three of us take a seat on the grass. “Eat up, Julian. We don’t have a ton of time, and you need to fill your stomach.”

  “So, Julian, why do you want to join the Army?” I want to change the subject hoping he’ll relax a bit. Clearly he’s not taking to his lack of food situation around me too well.

  He sighs. “My home life sucks. I need to do something, and there’s no way I can pay for college, so I plan on blowing this place for a while, get my crap together, and then figure out what comes next once I’ve lived Army life a bit.”

  “That’s a very mature answer.” I tell him with pride.

  “I had some help figuring shit out.” He looks over at Keegan with a small smile.

  “Army life isn’t horrible so long as you’re stationed in the states or in a non-combat zone. I’m not going to lie, combat zones are not pretty. They are scary, and there’s a lot to worry about, but if you take your training serious and pay attention to what you’re doing you’ll be fine.” I bite into my burger. “I recommend that you start working out. It will make bootcamp easier, push ups, sit-ups, and run. Work on it a little every day and then you’ll only need to worry about the mental aspect of it.”

  “Can’t be any worse than what I deal with now,” Julian mumbles, shoving his burger into his mouth.

  I feel for this kid. He shouldn’t be dealing with this, but unfortunately he is, and I want to help him. “You need to take your ASVAB testing to see where you score for military job placement. I know a few people who are still in recruiting. I can hook you up.”

  “That would be great, thank you. We do have the testing option at school. I think the test is in a month or so.”

  “If they do this like when I was in school, they will have recruiters heading up to the testing. Do not talk to them, avoid them. I will get you a recruiter who will genuinely care about you and your career, not just about getting another new recruit.” He nods his understanding as he balls up his paper plate and napkin. I look over to Keegan who shrugs. I don’t know this kid but he seems off to me. His expression is more than sad. His eyes look lost despite talking about finding his way. I hope we can help him.

  Keegan tells me he has to get back to work, but I’m welcome to hang out here. He still has one more class to give with Julian, and I have some things I want to purchase, plus, I haven’t finished looking at the baskets for the auction. I tell him I’m going to walk around and I’ll meet up with him in a bit.

  It’s been a long day with the fair and all, but Keegan and I have plans to go out tonight nothing major. We discussed going for a walk and grabbing some dinner. Then we’ll decide whose house we’re spending the night at. I’ve started to leave an overnight bag packed in case I decide to stay at his place. My room is nice, and it’s usually pretty quiet here, but he has the apartment to himself, no roommate to worry about hearing us, or interrupting.

  There’s a knock at the door, and when I open it his bright his deep green eyes lock onto mine. “Are you ready?”

  “Yeah.” I scoop up my overnight bag and we head down to his car. On the way, he thanks me for talking with Julian today, and tells me Julian told him he was sorry for clamming up a bit while we were talking. I felt horrible when he told me he was embarrassed because I’m a woman and I care more than his own mama.

  He parks the car along the street and we start our walk down this walking path we found. He takes my hand and suddenly becomes very quiet. “I thought you looked amazing today.” He gives me a questioning look. “I don’t mean in your uniform. I mean the way you were handling the kids. You truly enjoy that, don’t you?”

  “I do, and they need this program. It’s important for them to grow up understanding addiction, bullying, and how they each affect the people around them.”

  I’m afraid to ask this, but he has promised me all along that tonight was the night he was going to tell me why this all means so much to him, and he really is passionate about it. It was so evident in the way he was handling himself and the kids. Shoot, it’s evident in the way he helps Julian as much as he can. “Why are you so passionate about this program?”

  “I had a shit start.”

  “So I’ve heard.” I’m trying to be gentle, but he’s already told me this. I’ve told him everything. I’ve totally lost it in front of him, now I need to know he feels like he can do the same, but he keeps quietly walking down the path. We both stare straight ahead, not saying a word. At this point I’m really not sure what to say to him, but as I’m about to say something he speaks up.

  “My mother was an addict.” His voice is raspy, like he’s fighting back emotions. “Very few people know this. I haven’t even told Dr. Miranda the entire story.” He continues looking straight ahead and it kills me. A part of me wants to stop him, look him in the eye and tell him it will be okay, but I need him to get out some more first, and if that means he needs to keep staring forward then that’s fine. “My father protected me from her. He knew she had a problem, but he wouldn’t leave her because he needed to make sure I was safe.” He sniffles. “He once told me he hated her, but couldn’t leave because he knew it would be hard for him to get custody of me. The state often automatically hands custody to the mother, and there was no way he was letting me live like that.” He takes a slow deep breath. “One day I came home from school to find my father dead on the floor. Her drug dealer at the time shot him in the back and left her a note saying she best get to work selling his drugs or she and I would be next.” I silently squeeze his hand in support as I fight
back the tears threatening to erupt from my eyes. I need to be strong for him right now, and that’s exactly what I’ll be. “Life became hell after that. I was beaten and abused. She would allow them to use me in order to gain access to her drugs.” He swipes away tears now streaming down his gorgeous face. “I tried to run away, but she always managed to find me.” He shakes his head. “I fucking hate her. She should be dead, not my father.” He stops and turns to me. “That’s why I became a cop. I swore to God I wouldn’t allow any child to go through that. I’ll fight to my final breath to protect these kids from dealing with what I went through.”

  I use my thumbs to swipe away his tears. “I’m sorry you had to live that way. It’s horrible, and no child should have to go through what you went through, but like you told me, you have to face it.”

  He nods. “I know, and Dr. Miranda knows everything except the abuse part. She knows my mother got my father killed, but I couldn’t bring myself to admit the rest to her. I couldn’t admit it to anyone until now.”

  “What changed?”

  “I love you, and I knew I would break you if I didn’t tell you.” He shrugs. “And to be honest, it felt a lot better to get it out than I thought.”

  I press up on my toes to kiss his soft, wet lips. “I love you, too. I’m not one for love at first sight, but I knew from the moment we met we had a connection, and then when I learned your soul was as shattered as mine, I knew it was meant to be. We heal each other where others would break each other more.” He kisses me again, hard, our teeth clash and our tongues collide.

  “Can we order takeout instead of eating out? I need to get you home.”

  I chuckle. “I’d love that.”

  As soon as we’re through the door his mouth is on mine. His kiss is rough, needy, and it’s making my panties wet. He looks into my eyes. “Tell me again.”

  At first I’m confused but then I realize what he wants to hear. “I love you.” I tell him through a huge grin.

  “You have no idea how afraid I was that you would leave once you realized how fucked up I am.”

  I shake my head. “You’re not fucked up. Your past is fucked up. You’ve done great things, you’ve come a long way, and you continue to get better. We will continue to get better, but we have to keep talking to each other.”

  “Says the woman who was quite quiet when we first met.” I know he’s joking with me.

  I shrug. “I learned a thing or two in my few weeks of working with Dr. Miranda.” Dr. Miranda is awesome at what she does, and has gotten me to open up like no one else has, and I don’t even know how she did it.

  He kisses me again, but when he does my stomach growls. “Hungry?”

  “A little.”

  He pulls his phone from his back pocket, orders a ton of food from the Chinese restaurant up the street, and then goes right back to kissing me. “We don’t have much time until our dinner gets here and I need to be inside you.” I roll my hips grinding against his cock.

  He spins me around, bends me over the arm of the couch, and pulls off both my leggings and panties. His hand slides over my ass, squeezing it as he makes his way down to my soaked pussy. He slips his fingers inside me checking to see if I’m ready. A moan escapes me as his fingers hit that magic spot. He pulls them back out, and grabs my ponytail forcing my head to the side.

  “Do you know how amazing you taste?”

  I shake my head.

  “Open.” I do as he asks and he slips his fingers into my mouth.

  “Suck them clean. You have the sweetest pussy I’ve ever tasted, and after we eat, we are going to clean up and I’m going to take you all over again.”

  He undoes his pants, lines himself up, and slams inside me so hard the couch shifts. With one hand on my ponytail and the other on my hip he continues his punishing rhythm. I love it. It feels so damn good. “Fuck, Keegs.” I’m already on the verge of an orgasm. Grabbing both of my hips he forces me to meet him thrust for thrust. “Yes!” I scream out as my pussy tightens around his cock. He slams into me one last time spilling his seed deep inside me.

  His hands glide up my back and his lips follow, kissing a trail up my spine. “I’m sorry if that was a bit rough,” he whispers next to my ear.

  “It was perfect.”

  Suddenly there’s a knock at the door. “Shit.” I grab my stuff and run to the room while he shouts ‘one minute’ to the person behind the door. When I’m out of sight and he’s tucked away he opens the door to collect our food. I hear him laugh, and can’t help but wonder if the guy was outside the door and heard us. We come here to escape my roommate’s ears and now the delivery guy is listening to us.

  We decide to eat dinner on the living room floor with our legs spread out in front of us while watching a comedy show on TV. We were both very quiet, but it was a comfortable quiet. I was worried he would be lost in thoughts of what he just told me about all night but he seems to be good with it. We’re enjoying the show and laughing at the guy’s jokes.

  When the show comes to an end he quickly gets up pulling me with him. “What are you doing?”

  “It’s time for round two. This time I want to make love to you, show you how much I love that amazing body of yours.”

  He pulls me straight to his room and devours me like he hasn’t had me in months.

  Lexi and I have either spent the night together or spoken over the phone every night this week. She had her first three long shifts following Harper around the hospital. It was quite exhausting for her because she’s been out of work recovering from her injuries. This is bound to be an adjustment, but she’s excited. Tonight we’re going out with her friends to celebrate. Then tomorrow her parents are coming over for dinner. She told me she was ready for them to meet me and she feels like she owes them a little of her time, because she’s hasn’t seen them since she’s been back. As soon as she gets here we’re taking off to the pool hall for some food and fun. She even invited Harper to join us. She wants to introduce her to everyone.

  I’m in the kitchen tidying up when Lexi comes in. I gave her a key to my place and told her to stop knocking. I feel like we’re far past that point in our relationship. “Keegs, I’m here,” she calls out as she comes through the door.

  She looks amazing in her fitted jeans and loose fitting purple sweater. She takes my breath away every time I see her. “You keep showing up looking all fucking sexy we aren’t going to leave.” I pull her to me, pressing her body to mine.

  She giggles. “I do it for you.”

  “Baby, you don’t need to dress up for me. I think you would be sexy in a fucking burlap sack.”

  She tosses her head back in laughter. “I would be itchy, too.”

  I shake my head. “Let’s get out of here. I have reserved the same pool table we had last time, and I don’t want to lose it because we’re late.”

  On the way to the pool hall I let her know I picked up everything we need for dinner tomorrow night. When we arrive Chloe and Lucas are pulling up right next to us. The girls jump out of the car and hug like it’s been ages since they’ve seen each other while Lucas and I laugh and shake hands.

  We walk in together and the girls head over to our table grabbing some stools, while Lucas and I check in. “I got the table.” Lucas pulls his wallet out. I start to argue but he puts up his hand to stop me. “You guys paid for everything last time, and tonight we’re celebrating Lexi.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  “No, problem. Chloe already made me promise we would cover this and I’m not about to get in the doghouse with her. If you want to argue, talk to her.” He laughs.

  “Nah, she’s my partner, I’m not getting on her bad side. She’d probably shoot me in the ass or something.”

  He bursts into laughter. “I won’t tell her you said that.”

  I slap him on the back. “I appreciate that.” I’m liking this guy more and more.

  When we get back to the table Chloe is glaring at us with her hands on her hips. “What are yo
u two up to?”

  Lucas and I both look at each other confused. “Nothing.” I act as though I have no idea what she’s talking about.

  “You two look like you’re plotting revenge.”

  I burst into laughter. “Oh we will get our revenge tonight.”

  “Yeah, good luck with that.” Lexi slips off the chair and strolls over to me in a very slow, sexy manner. She’s literally strutting her stuff. “If you think I won’t pull out all the stops to win, then you don’t know me very well.” She slides her hand over my thigh while looking deep into my eyes and biting her lip.

  Fuck me, I’m already getting hard. “You’re a fucking tease,” I whisper, narrowing my eyes at her.

  “And...”

  I lick my lips. “I’ll remind you later how I handle a tease.”

  She giggles. “I can’t wait.”

  This woman is going to be the fucking death of me. She walks away shaking her ass. Lucky for her Harper comes walking through the door with her boyfriend or I might have taken her to the back and fucked her right over the sink.

  She spots her friend and squeals as she runs over. “Harper.” They hug for a minute, and then rejoin the group.

  “Hey, everyone, this is my friend Harper.” Lexi points to each of us rattling off our names as she does. Harper tells us her boyfriend's name is Knox. The guy shakes hands with us and waves to the girls. We discover that Knox is a tattoo artist. He owns his own shop here in Boston and has done Lexi’s tattoos. I can’t help but be a little jealous over how much of my girl’s body this guy has actually seen, but I push it aside, reminding myself I’m the one she sleeps with at night.

  We organize a round of pool while Chloe and Lucas place an order for appetizers. I explain to Knox that Lucas is still learning to play, but that we should play guys on gals and teach him the ropes. He gives me an evil grin. “I’m good with that. I have some pool skills.” I fist bump him and inform Lucas he’s with us.

  “Are you guys prepared to lose?” He laughs.

 

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