“I’ll buy you guys a really nice baby shower gift.”
“No need. Of course I’ll do it. Bribery isn’t required,” he grinned, “but it is very much appreciated.”
“Thanks, Gilligan.” She forced a smile, but it felt strange and brittle on her face. Fortunately, he seemed to ignore it.
“Back to work we go! Heigh ho, heigh ho!”
Shaking her head at him, she tried to focus on her work. To block out the bitter taste in her mouth whenever she remembered the last words she’d had with Thomas. He had been so angry, his face empty of any of the charming kindness she’d fallen in love with.
Shit.
There was the pain just behind her ribs again, a twist that made her rub over her sternum in an effort to ease it. Before Thomas Hathaway she’d thought heartbreak was just a phrase, but now she understood the word. It actually felt like her heart was broken, nothing but shrapnel in her chest, but it was too late. Everything had been too late.
Discovering how she felt about him. The call to Antoine where’d he shouted at her for lying to him, for making him wait around for a non-existent story.
She should have come clean when she’d had the chance. That first morning when she’d woken up in his arms, in his bed, and known that he wasn’t something she could live without.
Except, now she had to. She’d never get to hear him call her beautiful again. She probably wouldn’t hear him say anything again unless she watched C-SPAN for the next decade, and that would be exactly what she deserved.
A lonely, empty life.
His cell phone buzzed in his pocket, but Thomas squeezed the button on the side to silence it, keeping his face placid as he tried to pay attention in the meeting.
The rest of the world hadn’t stopped just because his had fallen apart.
There was a list of people who wanted time with him, a litany of meetings booking his calendar from eight in the morning to eight at night because of his absence. Alan had even apologized for the back-to-back nature of them, but Thomas didn’t even mind. It kept his mind off everything else, off her.
“What do you think, Hathaway? Will we have enough support?” Congressman Bowen was looking at him, and the collection of aides and other representatives turned towards him as well.
“I think we’re in a good place, as long as we verify with Richard and get one more of the swing votes.”
“Who would you recommend?” Bowen asked, and Thomas wanted to just tell him to do his own damn research. Do his own job. Be as familiar with their peers as he was, but that was the only reason Thomas was even in this meeting. His comfort level with the Democrats in Congress. As one of the more junior members, he should have been grateful to even be in the room.
Focus.
He took a slow breath, running through the people in his head until a name appeared. “Charles, from Georgia. I think he was on the edge.”
“Not Laura Cohen out of Maine?”
“If you think you can swing both of them, talk to both of them.” Thomas sounded as tired as he felt, and the sudden buzz of conversation in the room was more irritating than invigorating. His phone vibrated in his pocket again, and he closed his eyes to try and push back the rush of frustration.
“Thomas – why don’t you talk to Charles, and Mary Beth will talk to Laura. Then we can meet again on Monday when we’re all back. Does that sound good to everyone?” Bowen looked around the room, and Thomas followed suit with the chorus of agreements. Anything to end the meeting so he could have five minutes to grab some water before the next one.
“Great, see you all then.”
It was several hours later when Thomas was finally walking back into his office, and Alan was right there with a notepad in hand. “I ordered you dinner again, it should be here soon. Trisha wanted to talk to you before she left for the day about the brief summary, and Representative Billings’ assistant asked me again about the golf tournament in the Spring. They need an answer.”
“Fine,” Thomas agreed as he walked back into his office and Alan followed.
“Perfect, I’ll confirm that then. Your mother called, by the way. Asked you to call her back whenever you got a chance.” He held out a short stack of post-it notes. “And here are the other messages from today.”
“Thank you, Alan.” He took the papers from him and settled into his chair, rubbing his hands over his face. “Is there anything else?”
His assistant was standing beside his desk, shifting his weight from foot to foot as he stared. “Did something happen in New York? You haven’t been right since –”
“Everything is fine, Alan. When will Trish be in?”
“Probably soon. Friday is a light day with most of the representatives leaving for the weekend, you’ve got a few meetings in the morning, and nothing in the afternoon.”
“Good,” Thomas sagged in his seat, not even looking at the stack of work he still had to do. None of which even remotely interested him at the moment.
“Can I do anything for you?” Alan asked, and he knew it was a sincere offer. His assistant, his friend, knew him better than most people. He’d joined him just after the successful campaign in New York for his first term, and now they were starting their second.
Summoning a smile for the man, he shook his head. “No, but I appreciate it.”
“No dinner reservations?” Alan prompted, a tinge of hope in his voice.
“No. No dinner reservations.” Thomas instantly shut down, turning to his laptop like he actually wanted to do work, and Alan took the cue.
“Alright. I’ll be leaving after the food gets here.”
“Thanks,” he answered, and waited for Alan to pull his door closed before he propped his elbows on his desk and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes. Just as he was trying to empty his head of visions of Maddie, his phone buzzed again and he growled and ripped it from his pocket.
Three texts from Jaxson, and a missed call.
The phone barely rang once before Jaxson answered, “Thomas?”
“Hey, let me guess. More bad news?”
“No, actually. I did confirm she was speaking with an Antoine Cano at The Washington Post, but I made some calls to some friends, and there’s no story. Not about Runway, or a sex club in D.C., or anything.” Jaxson blew out a breath on the other end of the line. “It seems like she was telling the truth.”
“Except for all the lying before that,” he retorted, feeling that uncomfortable twist inside whenever he thought about the things they’d done.
“Right.” The line was silent for a moment, nothing but dead air, and then Jaxson huffed. “Look, I know she fucked up, but –”
“There’s no buts to this, Jaxson. She used me to get into Black Light –”
“For a story she didn’t actually do anything with.”
“It doesn’t matter!” Thomas raised his voice, leaning back in his chair to stare at the ceiling. “I played with her, I had sex with her, and it was all a game. Just a research session to her.”
“Have you called her?” Jaxson asked.
“Why would I call her? I have nothing to say.” He shook his head, wishing that everyone on his staff had left so he could dig out that bottle of liquor someone had gifted him a month before for Christmas.
“Because you told me last week she was the most interesting girl you’d ever met. That you couldn’t stop thinking about –”
“Well, I’m not thinking about her anymore,” Thomas lied, and he knew Jaxson didn’t believe him. She still popped into his head whenever he had a moment to breathe, only now the memories were tinged with an acidic discomfort.
“My IT guys finished wiping the information off her laptop, and her hard drive. I’ve got a courier service delivering it tonight. It’s all over if you want it to be.”
“Good. There’s nothing more to be done.”
Jaxson sighed heavily, letting out a round of quiet curses on his end of the phone before he spoke again, “You’re really going to g
ive up on this?”
“Give up on what? A girl who lied to me about everything she was? Who let me play with her when she was uneducated and had no fucking idea what we were doing?” Thomas laughed bitterly, struggling to keep his voice down so no one outside his door would hear. “I mean, how could she even have consented to what we did? To me tying her up? Using a goddamn cane on her when she didn’t have a clue what it even was?”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Thomas.”
“It sure as fuck feels like I did, and she broke so many rules I can’t even think of them all. She lied to me, to my face, so many times…” His voice trailed off as flashes of her flickered through his mind. The sight of her against the cross, on her knees with nipple clamps making her beautiful face contort with pain and panting pleasure. All lies. “There’s no fixing this, Jaxson. I appreciate you handling this, making sure the article didn’t go out, because that would have been the worst outcome – but there’s nothing more you can do.”
“Okay, listen to me. So, she wasn’t into the lifestyle before she found Black Light, before she met you. Did you give her a safe word? Tell her to use it?”
“Of course,” Thomas growled.
“And did she ever, even once, accuse you of crossing the line with her?”
“Why would she? I was her fucking meal ticket into Black Light. To you. To Chase, and Emma, and every one of the members.”
“She didn’t send the article, Thomas. I read it. It was done, and she didn’t send it in. She’s got a journalism degree from Penn State, she’s working as a copy editor at a local coupon paper, and she just declined a very lucrative job offer from The Washington Post to join their staff.”
For you.
The words hung, unspoken, in the silence on the call, but Thomas couldn’t bring himself to feel anything beyond the bitter betrayal that had tainted every moment between them. “There’s no fixing what she’s done.”
“It took a stroke of luck and a leap of faith for me to find my happiness, Thomas, and it wasn’t easy. It was messy, and hard, but sometimes that’s what it takes.”
“I’m happy for you, Jaxson. I’ve told you that before, and I’m glad you moved to D.C. so we could reconnect, but I don’t see a way past this.”
“Just tell me one thing, and be honest or I’ll come over and call you an asshole to your face in front of all your politician friends.” Jaxson’s voice had a hint of laughter in it, but it felt serious.
“What?”
“Did you care about her?”
Thomas sighed, remembering soft skin and sweet lips and her perfect voice against his ear. “I did, but it doesn’t matter now.”
“Alright.” His old friend sighed against the phone, and he heard the clink of ice that signaled he was already drinking. “I’m around if you want to talk, or just – I don’t know – stare at each other so you’re not by yourself.”
“Thanks,” he answered, but he didn’t want to be around Jaxson and all his happiness. He didn’t want to be around anyone. After a moment they said their goodbyes and hung up. With the heavy conversation still weighing on him, he tried to bury his mind back in work. Fill in all the cracks with meetings, and briefs to read, and the small part he played in helping the country run.
The first sticky note he picked up was the note asking him to call his mom back, but he knew she would just want to talk about the girl he’d mentioned at his father’s birthday lunch – and there was nothing more to say about that. So, instead, he reached for his phone to call Trisha’s desk and ask her to come by for their meeting.
Chapter Fifteen
Sunday
Maddie propped the laundry basket against her hip, and used her free hand to open her door. The phone buzzing in her back pocket at a rhythm that told her it was a phone call, and she pulled it out as soon as she was able to kick the door closed. It was a number she didn’t recognize, and so she let it roll to voicemail.
Placing the basket beside the suitcase on her bed, she started to fold clothes, either packing them or putting them on the floor behind her. It was a mindless activity, which felt like all she was good for these days. Cleaning her apartment like she’d suddenly developed OCD, biking endless miles in the building’s gym, anything to keep her from sitting in silence because that was when she started to think.
Her phone rang again, but this time it said a name: Chase Cartwright.
“What the hell?” she dropped the pair of yoga pants in her hand and stared at the screen for a moment. Her stomach twisted, nervous, but she knew he’d just call back if she ignored it. If they wanted to yell at her some more, she might as well take it. Pressing the answer button she spoke softly, “Hello?”
“Hey, Maddie.”
“Chase? Why are you in my –”
“I added my number when you gave us your phone, and I was hoping you’d call, but I guess you didn’t notice.”
“No, I didn’t.” She’d been avoiding her phone, avoiding everything that brought up memories of Thomas.
“How are you doing?” his voice was warm, sweet, and she knew exactly what he was asking about, but she knew if she even thought about it she’d burst into tears again.
“Fine.”
“I thought you were done with lying.” It sounded like a playful prod, but it made her angry. Why the fuck was he even calling her?
“I’m hanging up now.”
“Wait!” Chase sounded panicked, and so she brought the phone back to her ear.
“What? I’m really busy.”
“Jaxson wants to talk to you, but you didn’t answer when he called.”
“He didn’t put his number in my phone, and I only answered you because it surprised me. I clearly should have ignored both.” The biting anger was in her voice now, but he seemed unfazed.
“Well, will you talk to him for a minute?” Before she could respond, she heard soft words on his end of the line, and the shuffle of the phone changing hands.
“Maddie?” It was Jaxson Davidson, that low voice something she would have recognized anywhere.
“I got the laptop and stuff, if that’s what you’re calling about, and if you want to yell at me some more just get it over with.”
“It’s not, but I’m glad you got it back. Actually, there’s one more thing we need from you before we can put this all behind us,” Jaxson’s voice was almost gentle.
“What else could you possibly need?” Maddie asked, defeat taking over the anger in her voice as she sat down on the edge of her bed, shoving the laundry basket further back.
“I need you to come to the club tomorrow night and sign some things. Simple confirmations that you’re not going to take any further action with the information you have.”
“You have the NDA on file. You reminded me of that.”
“Yes, but since that didn’t seem to faze you before, the lawyers want a little more assurance from you. How does seven o’clock sound?”
“I’m not going to do anything with what I know. The Post won’t even talk to me anymore. What more do you want?” She felt exhausted, and all she wanted was to be back in her parent’s house, eating her mom’s food, drinking with her dad while they watched some old, film noir detective movie.
“I want you to show up at Black Light tomorrow, at seven PM.” Jaxson’s tone had shifted, not welcoming any argument.
“Fine. I’ll be there. Do you want me to go to the psychic shop, or Runway?” Maddie felt a slim flourish of satisfaction reminding him that she knew about both entrances.
“Runway will be fine I’ll be there to open the door for you. Both clubs are closed on Mondays so there won’t be a line or anything.”
“Guess I’ll see you then.”
“Good.” He hung up before she got the chance to do it first, and she growled at the phone before switching to text her parents, telling them she’d be home on Tuesday instead.
At least then this would all be done, and she could figure out what was next without the purple glow o
f Black Light haunting her.
Monday Night
Paul was silent in the car as he pulled up in front of Runway just before nine, the neon and lights all turned off, but there was a single security light above the front doors. Thomas sighed as Paul jumped out and walked around to open his car door. “I’ll have Jaxson’s people give me a ride home when we’re done meeting, no need to wait around.”
“If you’re sure, Mr. Hathaway.”
“I am. Have a good night, Paul.” Thomas shut the car himself, and then walked towards the doors. He pulled out his phone, ready to call Jaxson, but his friend was standing there when he raised his head again. “Hey.”
“Hey,” Jaxson answered. “Ready to talk?”
“I told you it wasn’t necessary, I’m fine.” Following him into the interior of the club, it looked strangely naked when it wasn’t packed with people and covered in colorful lights and lasers.
“Look, you’re my friend, right?” Jaxson asked as they meandered towards the back hall and through the curtain into backstage.
What the fuck was he doing?
“Yes,” Thomas nodded and waited in the club’s supply closet for him to open the door. “We’re going to Black Light to talk? Why don’t we just go to your office?”
“It’s the best place for this conversation.” Jaxson headed down the steps to the security room as he followed. “Anyway, I’m done doing this dance, so I’m just going to lay it out for you. I know you care for Maddie –”
He tried to interrupt, but Jaxson didn’t even give him the chance.
“And I know this situation was a nightmare. For you, for me… and for her. But you’re my friend, and I’m not just going to ignore something when I think you have a chance to be happy.” Jaxson stood in the strange pale, purple light of the locker room, facing off with him. “You’re miserable, and so is she.”
“She doesn’t have any right to feel miserable! This is all her fault!” Thomas snapped, irritated at having to follow Jaxson around like a puppy as he threaded his way downstairs.
Black Light: Exposed (Black Light Series Book 2) Page 18