by Peter Archer
INDEX
A
Absi, tami, 106–10, 178–84
“Absinthea Pillock’s Charm School for girls Whose Fathers Can Afford tuition” (Fiske), 17–20
Amateur theater, 30
American Revolution, 195
Angst, Cheryl, 50–53
Archer, Jocelyn, 75–76
Austen, Anna, 85, 92
Austen, Anne, 92
Austen, Cassandra (mother), 10, 13, 124–25
Austen, Cassandra (sister), 10, 92, 109, 191
Austen, Charles, 93
Austen, Edward, 92, 172
Austen, Eliza, 93
Austen, Elizabeth, 92
Austen, Fanny, 93
Austen, Frank, 85
Austen, George, 10, 61, 68
Austen, Henry, 36, 79–80, 84, 93, 190–92
Austen, James, 30, 36, 92
Austen, Jane on Bath, England, 159–60
biographical information, 10
country life and, 177–78
death of, 109
early writing of, 46
Emma, 20–21, 101–02, 185
fame of, 192, 199
family life, 134
First Impressions, 60–61
grammatical errors of, 144–45
historical context of, 195–96
ill health of, 108–09
“Jack & Alice,” 152
Lady Susan, 163–64
Lesley Castle, 168
letters of, 114–15, 152
Love and Freindship, 46, 97, 143
Mansfield Park, 84–85, 100, 101, 164
Northanger Abbey, 55–56, 134, 144, 159–60, 168, 190–92
Persuasion, 105, 185–86, 191
Pride and Prejudice, 55, 60–61, 68, 79–80, 145, 155–56, 178>
Sandition, 105–06, 108
Sense and Sensibility, 55, 74, 145, 155, 156
spelling of, 143–44
Susan, 190–91
tomb of, 198–99
Watsons, 21
writing habits of, 71
writing style of, 151–52
Austen, Mary, 109
Austen-Leigh, James-edward, 71, 163, 185–86, 191
B
Bad Austen Writing Contest
overview of, ix–xi
winning story, 2–5
Bath, england, 159–60
“Bedside Manners” (Moore), 150–51
“Bennet Bridezillas” (o’Donnell), 135–38
“The Bennet Bunch” (Mitchell), 165–68
“Black ops Bennets” (Redgate), 128–31
Bloom, Anabella, 76–78
C
Cadell, Thomas, 61
Carlton House, 102
“Caroline’s Humiliation Conga” (Celticgirl13), 121–28
Chapman, R. W., 115
Charlotte (princess), 74
Chawton Cottage, 172
“Christmas at Pemberley” (Granger), 43–47
Clarke, James Stainer, 101–02
Commercialization, 105–06
Contemporary stories, 81–147
“Bennet Bridezillas” (o’Donnell), 135–38
“Black ops Bennets” (Redgate), 128–31
Contemporary stories—cont.
“The eldest, the Youngest & Matchmaker.com” (Absi), 106–10
“Fools and Folly” (Manzi), 98–100
“Pemberley High” (Rstand-ford), 82–86
“Pride and Paparazzi” (Simard), 145–47
“Pursuit” (Richards), 118–21
“Regency Matchmaking” (Graham), 87–89
“Samosas and Sensibility” (Dashgupta), 110–14
“Sarah and katherine” (Dravenstott), 102– 05
“Sass and Sexual Ambiguity” (Spencer), 138– 40
“Sense & Circuitry: Cyberth 1813” (Fiske), 93–97
“Status and Social Networking” (Phillips), 131–34
“Virtue and Voracity” (Hargis), 141– 43
Cope, Sir Zachary, 109
Country walking, 178
D
Dashgupta, Sayantani, 110–14
“Dead and Loving It” (Taver-nier), 168–72
“Destitute in Dubai” (Rabab), 115–18
Dravenstott, Laura, 102–05
E
Edgeworth, Maria, 79
Egerton, Thomas, 84, 156
Eighteenth century, 195–96
“The Eldest, the Youngest & Matchmaker.com” (Absi), 106–10
Emma (Austen), 20–21, 101–02, 185
“Emma Interrupted” (Archer), 75–76
England
Bath, 159–60
eighteenth-century, 195–96
F
“Farthingale Junction” (Swanson), 8–11
Fielding, Henry, 30
“Finer endings” (Hester), 30–33
First Impressions (Austen), 60–61. See also Pride and Prejudice (Austen)
First Impressions (Holford), 61, 155–56
Fiske, Margaret, 17–20, 93–97
“Foolishness and Folly” (Wigington), 62–65
“Fools and Folly” (Manzi), 98–100
Francklin, Thomas, 30
French Revolution, 195
G
Gates, Margaret k., 90–93
Gay, Gloria, 40–43
George, Prince of Wales, 100–102
George III, 100
Girls’ schools, 20–21
Glover, Anne, 160–64
“Gone with the Pride” (Long), 152–55
Gothic novels, 55–56
Graham, Stacey, 87–89
Grammatical errors, 144–45
Granger, Diana L., 43–47
H
Hanson, tamara, 65–67
Hargis, Jennifer, 141–43
Hastings, Warren, 79
Heinrich, Brandy, 11–17
Heroines, 56, 97
Hester, Jennifer, 30–33
Holford, Margaret, 61
“The Horrors of expectation” (Mayo), 21–24
Hosterman, Diane katherine, 47–50
Hudson, kristine, 54–57
I
“In a More Canine-Like Manner” (Hanson), 65– 67
Innovation, 105–06
“Insult and Insolence” (Lurker), 27– 29
J
“Jack & Alice” (Austen), 152
“Jersey Shore Does Brighton” (Russell), 173–74
“John & Rebeccah: A Tale of Love Midst the Stars” (Angst), 50–53
Johnson, Samuel, 36
K
knight, Thomas, 172
L
Lady Susan (Austen), 163–64
“Leia: A Novel” (Nelson), 187–90
Leigh, Cassandra, 10, 13
Leigh, Theophilus, 13
Lesley Castle (Austen), 168
The Loiterer (magazine), 36
Long, Sandra, 152–55
Love and Freindship (Austen), 46, 97, 143
Lurker, Jaclyn, 27–29
M
Mansfield Park (Austen), 84–85, 100, 101, 164
Manzi, Susan g., 98–100
Marchini, tracy, 69–72
Mashups, 149–99
“Bedside Manners” (Moore), 150–51
“The Bennet Bunch” (Mitchell), 165–68
“Dead and Loving It” (Tavernier), 168–72
“Gone with the Pride” (Long), 152–55
“Jersey Shore Does Brighton” (Russell), 173–74
“Leia: A Novel” (Nelson), 187–90
“Mr. Collins (Part 1)” (Absi), 178–84
“Mr. Collins (Part 2)” (Absi), 181–84
“Tatooine Abby” (Sand-brook), 196–98
“Twilight at Northanger” (glover), 160–63
“Two-time and twilight” (Spiva), 192–95
“The Weasleys Visit Netherfield Park” (kimhpark), 174–77
“Woman of Wonder” (Winslow), 156–58
Matilda (Francklin), 30
Mayo, Matthew P., 21–24
&nbs
p; “Meekness and Misery; or, The Sad Love Affair of Mary Bennet” (Hosterman), 47–50
Memoir of Jane Austen (Austen-Leigh), 163, 185– 86
Milbanke, Anne Isabella, 79
“Miss Dashwood gets Down and Dirty” (Winslow), 33–37
Mitchell, Eileen, 165–68
Moore, C., 150–51
“Mr. Collins (Part 1)” (Absi), 178–81
“Mr. Collins (Part 2)” (Absi), 181–84
Murray, John, 101, 191
N
Nelson, Martti, 187–90
Nineteenth-century stories, 7–80
“Absinthea Pillock’s Charm School for girls Whose Fathers Can Afford Tuition” (Fiske), 17–20
“Christmas at Pemberley” (Granger), 43–47
“Emma Interrupted” (Archer), 75–76
“Farthingale Junction” (Swanson), 8–11
“Finer Endings” (Hester), 30–33
“Foolishness and Folly” (Wigington), 62–65
“The Horrors of Expectation” (Mayo), 21– 24
“In a More Canine-Like Manner” (Hanson), 65–67
“Insult and Insolence” (Lurker), 27–29
“John & Rebeccah: A tale of Love Midst the Stars” (Angst), 50–53
“Meekness and Misery; or, The Sad Love Affair of Mary Bennet” (Hosterman), 47–50
“Miss Dashwood gets Down and Dirty” (Winslow), 33–37
“The Perilous Plot at Pemberley” (Wigington), 37–40
“Pluck and Plumage” (Marchini), 69–72
“Pride, Prejudice, and Revenge” (Siler), 72–75
“Pride and Predictions” (Hudson), 54–57
“Pride and Prejudice: The First Draft” (Gay), 40–43
“Proper order” (Wright), 24–27
“An Unexpected guest” (Heinrich), 11–17
“Wild and Wanton Jane” (Bloom), 76–78
Northanger Abbey (Austen), 55–56, 134, 144, 159–60, 168, 190–92
O
O’Donnell, tara, 135–38
“Of turbans, Partridges, and Apple Pie” (The Janite), 57–60
p
“Pemberley High” (Rstand-ford), 82–86
Perfection, 97
“The Perilous Plot at Pemberley” (Wigington), 37–40
Persuasion (Austen), 105, 185–86, 191
Phillips, Mary C.M., 131–34
“Pluck and Plumage” (Marchini), 69–72
“Pride, Prejudice, and Revenge” (Siler), 72–75
“Pride and Paparazzi” (Simard), 145–47
“Pride and Predictions” (Hudson), 54–57
Pride and Prejudice (Austen), 55, 60–61, 68, 79–80, 145, 155–56, 178
“Pride and Prejudice: The First Draft” (gay), 40–43
Pro, 85
“Proper order” (Wright), 24–27
“Pursuit” (Richards), 118–21
R
“The Real Housewives of Bath-erly Hills” (Wardrop), 2–5
Redgate, Riley, 128–31
“Regency Matchmaking” (graham), 87–89
Richards, Patricia, 118–21
The Rivals (Sheridan), 30
Royal family, 100–101
Russell, Shelley, 173–74
S
“Samosas and Sensibility” (Dashgupta), 110–14
Sandbrook, Victoria, 196–98
Sandition (Austen), 105–06, 108
“Sarah and katherine” (Dravenstott), 102–05
“Sass and Sexual Ambiguity” (Spencer), 138–40
Schools, girls’, 20–21
“Sense & Circuitry: Cyberth 1813” (Fiske), 93–97
Sense and Sensibility (Austen), 55, 74, 145, 155, 156
Sentimental novels, 46
Sharp, Anne, 85
Sheridan, Richard, 30, 79
Siler, Wesley, 72–75
Simard, Wendy, 145–47
Spelling, 143–44
Spencer, Stacey, 138–40
Spiva, Heather, 192–95
“Status and Social Networking” (Phillips), 131– 34
Susan (Austen), 190–91
Swanson, Freya, 8–11
T
“Tatooine Abby” (Sandbrook), 196–98
Tavernier, Cathy, 168–72
“Through kitties’ Eyes” (gates), 90–93
Tom Thumb (Fielding), 30
“Twilight at Northanger” (glover), 160–64
“Two-Time and Twilight” (Spiva), 192–95
U
“An Unexpected guest” (Heinrich), 11–17
V
“Virtue and Voracity” (Hargis), 141–43
W
Wardrop, Stephanie, 2–5
The Watsons (Austen), 21
“The Weasleys Visit Netherfield Park” (kimhpark), 174–77
Wigington, Patti, 37–40, 62–65
“Wild and Wanton Jane” (Bloom), 76–78
Winslow, Shannon, 33–37, 156–58
“Woman of Wonder” (Winslow), 156–58
Wright, Michael, 24–27
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
PETER ARCHER is an editor at Adams Media and author of The Quotable Intellectual and I Watch, Therefore I Am. In his life he has been a college instructor, a convenience-store clerk, and a short-order cook, as well as a lifelong fan of Jane Austen. He lives in Wareham, MA.
JENNIFER LAWLER is a writer and editor and the author or coauthor of more than thirty books. Love of Jane Austen may have convinced her to earn a PhD in english Literature, but it was the love of laughter that made her beg to help create Bad Austen.
Copyright © 2011 by F+W Media, Inc.
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ISBN 10: 1-4405-1185-3
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eISBN 10: 1-4405-2944-2
eISBN 13: 978-1-4405-2944-3
Printed in the United States of America.
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available from the publisher.
Contains material adapted and abridged from 101 Things You Didn’t Know about Jane Austen: The Truth about the World’s Most Intriguing Romantic Literary Heroine, by Patrice Hannon, PhD, copyright © 2007 by F+W Media, Inc., ISBN 10: 1-59869-284-4, ISBN 13: 978-1-59869-284-6; and from Pride and Prej`udice: The Wild and Wanton Edition by Annabella Bloom and Jane Austen, copyright © 2011 by F+W Media, Inc., ISBN 10: 1-4405-0660-4, ISBN 13: 978-1-4405-0660-4
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