I woke up again later, but this time I was getting dragged out by some man I didn't recognize. I... don't want to say it. I can't. What happened.... the best way to say it is... it's like what Victor put me through, except hundreds of times worse, and he didn't listen when I tried to get him to stop. He didn't talk at all. I was in so much pain afterward. He brought me back to The Pit when he was done.
I was shaking. I wasn't cold, but I was fucking scared out of my mind, and I was getting sick to my stomach and starving.
The girl was still in the same spot next to me, and she asked me my name. I didn't think anyone was going to talk to me. I told her my name, and she said hers was Mick. She said it was short for Michelle, but she hated being called that. She was 14 and kind of pretty, or at least she would have been if she wasn't down there with me. She was the only friend I made.
I asked if she knew why we were here. She said we were here for the guys in town to be used whenever they wanted. Sometimes the girls would be taken out to the bus for a few days and brought back later. Some were, anyway. Mick said sometimes girls wouldn't come back. Other times, men would come down to The Pit and buy a girl.
Yeah, that's what I said. BUY. I still don't understand it. There's just.... no explanation for that kind of bullshit.
Mick would get taken too. Just like the rest of us. Sometimes it was a few times a day. I had no idea how much time passed while I was down there. We were down really far underground in some basement, so we almost never saw the sun or sky.
The guards would bring us stashes just about every day. Some of them made me dopey and tired, others made me really.. hyper, I guess. Not the good hyper either. I was all over the place, I started talking a lot, I'd try to peel crap off the walls. I think back and I remember that I was trying to stop myself from doing all these weird things, but it's like I didn't have control of my body. And the days I did the downer stuff or smoked, I'd be screaming inside my head to get out.
One time I got pretty sick from the needle, but Mick got me through it and told me that I'd taken too much at once. She had been taking the stuff for a while, and she showed me the best way to use it without hurting myself. She said she'd been down there for at least a year, and she'd seen tons of girls go too far.
Chapter 11
After a while down there, some of us were taken to the bus. Remember how I mentioned the black bus earlier? Yeah, it's part of The Pit. The bus would take us around to these different areas, and we'd be... rented out to whoever was interested. I'm getting really sick thinking about all this. It's... kind of making me crave again, but I can't let myself think about that right now. I need to just get this overwith.
Anyway, the bus. Most of the time Mick was with me on those trips, but once or twice she stayed behind, or I'd stay behind while she left. I hated being alone. Even with the other girls around me, they were all in their own worlds and didn't pay attention to me, or each other. The only one that talked to me was Mick.
I was starting to wish I was back with Victor. I had it good with him – I had a bed, food, and I only had to deal with his bullshit, not a bunch of random assholes. And I had Lydia. I had to keep telling myself that she was still alive, and maybe I had a chance of getting out and finding her. But after all that time in The Pit, and after getting the crap beaten out of me for trying to escape, I was starting to think I was going to die down there.
Victor only kept his promise long enough to use her for... whatever he was trying to do. He's fucking insane. Nobody survives getting bit by a zombie. The teeth didn't touch her, she just got really lucky. But now... I have no idea where she could be. I haven't seen her since that day. I keep hoping Victor is taking care of her, but then I remember what a good bullshitter he is. For all I know right now she's dead... or worse.
So anyway, there was only one time the bus stopped somewhere that nobody got on. I was really doped up so I had no idea where we were. They always gave us shots right before we got on the bus, and again about an hour before we got there. All I remember is that we were sitting there for... I don't know, a few hours, and no one got on the bus to check us out. The guards would tell the visitors that we were the "party bus." Normally there'd be a few guys that came to look at us, picked out the ones they liked, and brought us back the next morning. Nobody showed up this time, so the guards gave up and we went to the next town.
By the way, the inside of that bus was scary as hell. It was dark inside and there were a couple red lights up in the roof. The bus seats were some kind of leather I think, and it was really uncomfortable to sit in. It doesn't sound like much, but if you're high and freaked out, it's not somewhere you want to be.
There was this other time... probably one of the worst things I'd seen, and it didn't even happen to me. A couple of big guys came to The Pit, they were wearing all black, and they even had these weird masks with zippers on the front. They walked around for a few minutes, I guess deciding who to take, and they came up to Mick and handcuffed her hands and feet together and carried her out. I didn't see her again until probably a day later. They brought her back, uncuffed her and tried to talk to me, saying that "it'd be my turn next time."
She looked like hell, Barbie. She had cuts and bruises all over her arms, legs and face, a black eye, and I'm pretty sure I saw blood coming through her shirt around her stomach. She just... god, I can't even think of what happened to her. I tried to find out, but she wouldn't tell me anything. She got more quiet after that day, and the only thing we did together was get high. I would still try to talk to her, but she never said much.
It had to have been a few weeks or so. I hadn't had any hits for over a day, and I was starting to get sick. I woke up in the middle of trying to sleep and I was craving really bad. I went to wake up Mick to see if she had anything left from her stash, but she wasn't waking up. I kept shaking her, and I turned her over... she was bleeding out of her nose and mouth, but her eyes were open and she wasn't breathing. I started yelling at her, but she wouldn't answer me, and I saw her needle stuck in her arm. I knew she was dead, but I kept yelling for someone to help her. Nobody was listening. The other girls looked at me, but then ignored me. I ran to the door and started pounding on it to get one of the guards to help. One of them opened the door but instead of helping her, he punched me in the face and closed the door again.
That night I think was when I gave up. I stopped fighting and I just laid there trying to cry, but I couldn't. I was in burning pain, I was scared, and I was completely alone. I hated the girls down there, I hated the guards, and I hated Victor. And I hated myself. I don't know why I never found a way out of there in all that time. I swear Victor put a goddamn curse on me, and I couldn't think right or do anything right.
I fell asleep for a bit, but I woke up again later and I was shaking even worse than before. I was starving like always and all I could think about was where I was going to get a fix. I looked next to me and Mick was still lying in the same spot. No one had come to get her body. I was getting nervous... I had no idea if she was going to turn. All the other girls were sleeping. I started crying a little.
Then I heard Bagman. I saw him walk from the door and stand over Mick's body. He was staring right at me, kind of like how he stared at me in Victor's house. Finally he said something to me. I'll never forget it. He said, "Are you really this weak?" I've never heard his voice that clear. Usually it's all ragged and choppy and I can't understand him, but this time I heard the words. He still sounded like a monster, though. I didn't get what he was trying to tell me, so I didn't say anything back. Then he said, "Do you want to end up like her?" and he pointed at Mick.
The guard opened the door and when I looked up I saw Bagman disappear from the corner of my eye.
Chapter 12
They finally took Mick's body away. After seeing Bagman... I don't know, it's like something in me changed. I spent all this time giving up and letting all this shit happen. I was still scared of it all, but... I was getting pissed now. I kind of felt
like I was starting to snap.
The guard came in and told us we had to pretty up, because we were getting visitors. We didn't normally get visitors inside The Pit. It was usually someone coming in to get a girl for the day and bring them back later. This time, he said "a couple of us might get some new friends." We had to find our best clothes and look as good as possible... well, as good as we could. We didn't have showers, or makeup, or anything to really help.
The guards came around and gave all of us a shot. I was actually glad to get it, since I was tired of feeling sick and none of the other girls wanted to share their stashes. It must have been longer than I thought, because it really messed me up. I could barely see people's faces as they walked in, and I couldn't focus. So many people walked through The Pit... they were all checking us out, some were getting really close to us, like we were being inspected or something. Most of them were pretty damn creepy.
Then I saw Sarah. I was still messed up at the time, so I didn't believe it at first. She was with a couple of men I didn't recognize, and they started walking around. I wanted to scream at her to save me and to kill the guys keeping us all here, but it's like my body wasn't working right, I was frozen. Then she looked right at me! I know she saw me! She looked at me for a minute, then she went to talk to one of the guards. I kept staring at her, and I was hoping that she'd "pick" me to get me out. I didn't know what they were talking about, since everything was still kind of a blur at the time.
Sarah and the guard were talking for a while, and at least 3 or 4 girls were taken away by other people in that time. I didn't know why she wasn't just shooting the fuckers down.
Then... she left. She walked right out the door, and the guard locked us up again.
Barbie, I was about to lose my mind. She just left me down there! She could have saved me right that second and ended the nightmare. But she walked out. The people with her could have burned the place to the ground.
I thought that was the end. No one was going to save me. If Sarah didn't do anything, no one else was going to. Bagman was right... I was weak.
Chapter 13
Okay Barbie. Maybe now that I've told you all of this, and after Sarah reads it, maybe she'll understand what I did that night. Please don't think I'm crazy. That means you too, Sarah.
I finally decided I was going to get out. I didn't know how, I was just going to try. I was ready to die trying, which sounded a hell of a lot better than trying to survive The Pit.
So I hadn't had anything else the rest of the day – nothing to smoke or shoot, so I just kept feeling worse as time went on, but I was really awake. I got up and saw one of the guards by the door. All the other girls were sleeping. I started talking to him, but he was ignoring me like normal. So I touched him. No, I didn't want to, but that was the only way I knew I could get his attention. I said that I was sorry for being bad, and that I wanted him to like me again. He fell for it, and he brought me to this small room off to the side of the hallway.
Once I... you know, got him distracted enough, I found a knife on his belt. When he wasn't looking I took it and stabbed him in the stomach. He started screaming, but then I went for his throat to shut him up. Then... I just kept going. I swear I stabbed him probably 50 times. I kind of just stood up and watched him for a minute when he fell. He didn't die that fast, he was still trying to get up, but then he stopped moving.
I found his keys and took his gun. I found the right key after a while and I got the door open. There was a bunch of hallways and stairs that I had to walk around, and there were a lot of guards that I was trying to avoid. I felt like I was stumbling, but I had to stay quiet. I didn't have shoes on, so my feet were hurting like hell. Down at the end of one of the halls I saw Bagman, and it... kind of felt like he was wanting me to follow him. It was the first time that I wasn't afraid of him, and I think he was trying to help me.
This whole time I've been with Victor, and in The Pit, Bagman never did anything. Just watched. I guess he was waiting for me to do something.
I finally got outside. It looked like it was midnight, the town was so quiet. You have no idea how great it felt to have some real air. I saw Bagman near the corner of the building, and he walked around toward the alleyway. I followed him and when I turned the corner there was a guard smoking up against the wall. He put out the cigarette and walked away from me. I jumped up and stabbed him in the back of the neck. We both fell down, and I heard his head smack the ground. He didn't move anymore.
Then I heard voices from inside the building. They were yelling "guard down" and "one of the bitches is gone." Bagman kept showing up in these weird places, but I kept following him around. I was having to go through alleys, hiding behind dumpsters, boxes and shit like that. I ran into another guard, and I went for his neck like the others. But I don't think I cut him right since he didn't die right away. He kept trying to hold his neck to stop the bleeding and trying to yell for help. I just watched him until he finally died.
I found the little house that was used by that creepy doctor. It was so god damn nasty inside and it smelled like something died in there. Turns out he had this giant metal cage and there was about a dozen zombies inside it. It scared the hell out of me, and I realized that these were probably the zombies Victor was bringing into the town. No idea why, but as soon as I saw them it made me start itching, and I got more dizzy.
Then I saw you sitting open on the kitchen table and there was a bunch of bloody fingerprints all over your cover and pages. The doctor was reading you, I know it. Or maybe it was Victor? They were trying to learn about me and Lydia from you. I guess I wasn't the only one that was used. I'm just glad he didn't burn you or tear out your pages. You have no idea how happy I was to see you.
I saw my bag on the floor, so I put you inside and took it with me. I really wanted my gun back, but I was happy to at least have something.
I kept hearing more and more of the guards yelling outside. I looked back at the zombie cage and Bagman was standing in front of it, staring at the zombies. He had the right idea. I started looking through all the drawers and shelves, and I found a couple loose keys lying around. I tried to get to the locks, but the zombies kept trying to grab me. It took a few tries, but I got the lock open and ran out of the house.
Part of me thought I was going nuts. But that town was hell. No, it was worse than hell. Everyone there was better off dead, even the girls. I heard so many of them saying they wished they could kill themselves.
Besides, I knew I wasn't going to get out of there alone. The zombies would at least tear the place down while I figured out a way out.
I had to keep sneaking around because everyone was awake now, and all the guards were pissed. I passed by a tent with one of the flaps open, and I saw one of the guards with a girl... and... she looked like she was already dead. I wanted to puke. He saw me, but I just ran over and stabbed him before he could get up. Fucking sicko. It actually made me happy watching him die. I could have shot him, but the knife was faster. It probably hurt more, too.
Then I heard screaming and shooting, and stuff breaking. The zombies were tearing stuff up like I hoped, so I kept looking for a good escape path.
I ran past a house, and one of the guards in there saw me. He started shooting at me, but he missed when I hid around a corner. I tried to shoot back, but then my hands started shaking and I couldn't hold the gun very well. My head was pounding, I felt sweaty and I couldn't see straight. Then he punched me in the face and I fell down.
He reached over me and started to pick me up. I tried to get the gun, but I lost it, but I still had the knife on me, so the only place I could get him was stab him in the face. I don't know if I killed him, but I fucked him up pretty bad. I just got up and ran away, I didn't want to stay there.
Somewhere over by the main gate, I started hearing explosions, and I saw some fires starting in that direction. A couple of the buildings next to it caught fire too.
Then... sorry, part of it is kind of fuzzy for me agai
n. I know I fell down and it got blurred again. A couple people ran by, but they didn't stop to check me, I don't even know if they saw me. I started shaking really bad, so bad that I felt like my bones were trying to break from the inside. I wanted to scream, but I don't think I had enough breath for it.
I heard Bagman's voice again. He told me to get up. I didn't know what the hell was happening, but he said it again. I was still shaking, but I got up a little bit. It was hard to stand still and I was really off balance. Even now I don't know why Bagman was helping me. Maybe he thought that I was finally in too much trouble to get out of it myself, who knows. I didn't even know he cared.
I saw people running everywhere. There were bodies on the ground, zombies biting into people, guards shooting zombies, and people shooting each other. No Barbie, I had no idea why they were shooting each other. I didn't even think about it at the time.
Then a couple zombies got up close to me. I didn't have any weapons – the knife was still probably stuck in that guy's face, and the gun was lost. The house I was next to was burning up so I couldn't hide. I was still shaking and losing balance, and my head was going in circles, so I knew I wouldn't get far running.
Barbie, I knew I was going to die. I just stood there and closed my eyes.
I heard 2 gunshots, and the zombies fell down. When I opened my eyes, I saw Sarah and Jonathan running up to me. I swear I was dreaming it. I didn't think there was any way it was really them. Right about then my eyes started burning and everything got blurry again. I know that Sarah grabbed me and pulled me with her while she was running, but that's the last thing I remember.
Then, well, I woke up here.
Chapter 14
I didn't believe that I was actually out of there. I'd been having dreams over those months that I was rescued, or that I escaped, so when it happened I didn't believe it. I woke up on a cot with a real blanket, and Sarah and Jonathan were the first ones I saw. I started crying. I... just couldn't do anything else. Sarah came up and hugged me, and when I hugged back, I didn't want to let go. I cried even harder.
Kellie's Diary (Book 5) Page 4