What more could she add to that? He’d seen the ugly truth about her kind, experienced the horrors they were capable of inflicting upon humans. And now he knew about her and why it had been so wrong—so perilous—for them to have continued their relationship.
“So why did you get involved with me in the first place if you couldn’t trust yourself not to kill me? Living life on the edge, Bren? Was that it? Did you want to see how close you could get to the fire without getting burned?”
“I wasn’t attracted to you because you’re a sweetblood.”
“Bollocks. Apparently, people like you—” He said the word like a curse. “—find me very attractive.”
“I don’t want to find you attractive in that way.” The road in front of them suddenly became blurry and she angrily brushed back a tear. “I would never do something like that to you. Ever.”
She wasn’t sure whom she was trying to convince. Circumstances being what they were, her developing a craving for his blood wasn’t outside the realm of possibilities.
“I was attracted to you as a woman is to a man, Finn. That’s all. I liked how I felt around you. You saw things in me that I hadn’t considered before. My applying for that scholarship was a direct result of your influence. Ironically, if it hadn’t been for you, I might not have been here tonight. I wouldn’t have known you were in trouble.” She blinked another tear away. “Believe me, I tried to ignore the fact that you were a sweetblood. Never once did I try taking your blood. But the last time we were together…” The words hung in the air between them.
On the way back from a romantic dinner at a small Italian restaurant, they’d gotten carried away in his car. She’d unzipped his jeans, planning only to touch him until they got back to his place, but she hadn’t been able to stop herself from taking things further right then. He was there and he was so…magnificent. And straitlaced Brenna had taken Finn into her mouth while he drove.
“Dear God, woman,” he’d said in that deep, sexy-as-hell voice. “What are you doing to me?” Then he’d pulled the car to the shoulder, torn off her panties and made love to her in the backseat.
“You mean the night you gave me a roadie?”
Laughter burst from her throat, shattering the solemn mood inside the car. “Finn!”
“What do you expect? That’s a dream for teenage boys, not grown men. You rocked my world that night.”
“Yeah, well, it was the closest I’d come to losing all sense of what’s normal and reasonable. I could’ve killed you.”
Sensible women like her didn’t do things like that. A suggestive hand on his knee or a knowing glance over the top of a wineglass—maybe. But not taking him into her mouth while they idled at a stop light. The horn that had sounded from the truck next to them wasn’t because the light had changed to green.
“I can think of worse ways to die. Seriously, Bren, who the hell wants to be sensible and reasonable all the time? Life is for living. It’s not to be tiptoed around.”
“When it involves someone like me and someone like you, losing control is a recipe for disaster. Thank God I figured that out before it was too late. I came this close—” She held up two fingers, “—to taking your blood. And if I had, I doubt I’d have been able to stop.”
What was it about him that seemed to bring out her wild nature? Given her conservative upbringing and her desire to go into a serious field of study like medicine, she wasn’t used to letting her emotions take control. Her life was planned out and logical. You did X and then Y happened as a direct result.
But even now, she found Finn desperately attractive. The way he’d protected her against their attacker despite being held captive for so long was just plain crazy and insane. The experience hadn’t frightened or broken him. Although human, and a very vulnerable one at that, he was the epitome of raw, unbridled masculinity, undeterred by danger even when it stared him in the face. He seemed just as cocky and sure of himself now as he ever was.
On the one hand, that was what attracted her to him. His unpredictability. His actions that defied logic. On the other hand, those very traits scared the crap out of her.
“The blood on your lips…it did something to me when you kissed me, didn’t it?”
She nodded solemnly. “I hoped it would give you the strength you needed to make it out of the forest, and it did.” And she knew there could be dire consequences for her actions.
Blood-sharing with a human was just not done. Time and again, the Council had made that perfectly clear. But she was willing to take whatever punishment they doled out. Finn wouldn’t have had the strength to get away from their attacker without it. She shuddered, thinking how close that vampire had come to ripping out Finn’s throat. His fangs had been—
No, she wouldn’t let herself imagine what had almost happened. Finn was alive, he was safe, and that was all that mattered.
She stole another glance at him. He was touching his lip with the tip of his tongue. A little thrill ran through her and seemed to concentrate low in her belly. Her blood in his body. The thought had her insides twisting with pleasure.
Stop. She couldn’t let herself think that way either. It was too dangerous.
Instead, she focused on the fact that his hair was much longer than she’d ever seen it. Tucked behind his ears now, the flaxen strands angled under the edge of his square jaw. Having been in the Army, he’d always worn it short. She liked it both ways, but this was so…rugged. With her knees bent, it would give her something to hold onto when he—
Gripping the steering wheel tighter, she jerked her eyes forward and stared out the windshield into the darkness beyond the headlights. She couldn’t think about him doing that to her. Just because he knew the truth about what she was didn’t mean anything had changed.
As he’d made love to her that night in the backseat of his car, his eyes steeped with passion, she had felt the tips of her fangs breaking through her gums. Biting her lips closed, she’d arched her head back and forced herself to think of medical charts, prescription drug interactions and the sterile smell of the medic van, instead of the mouthwateringly gorgeous man inside her.
She recalled thinking his sweet blood pulsed just millimeters away from her lips. One little bite was all it would take for it to be flowing into her mouth. She’d have felt that little pop as her fangs pierced his vein and it’d all have been over.
Knowing that rational thought had a way of disappearing when an orgasm was imminent, she’d somehow managed not to climax with him that time. With her senses on overload, she’d have been like an animal acting on instinct alone. It would’ve been the opportunity her dark nature had been seeking. And if she had, she wouldn’t have been able to stop, for the taste of Sweet was much too potent.
Like Darkbloods, those rogue vampires who scoffed at the laws of their kind, she’d have drained him of his lifeblood then been left to wonder what to do with his chilling body. She could never have lived with herself.
The realization of how close she’d come that night had caused her to break things off with him a short time later.
Nothing had changed since then. He was still a sweetblood and she was still a vampire. The only difference was, now they both knew that a relationship between them was impossible.
Chapter Five
An hour later, they arrived downtown at the field office. After going through many layers of security, Xian, the office manager, led them down a corridor that seemed to stretch out forever before they stopped in front of a set of ornately carved doors.
“I’m sorry, but with such short notice, these are the only living quarters I have available at the moment. I trust you two don’t mind sharing a room? It is fully stocked with toiletries and various clothing items that might be useful. I hope you find everything to your liking.”
Unlike an impersonal hotel room, the suite Finn stepped into was warm and inviting. The walls were painted a rich caramel-brown, with a mahogany desk and leather loveseat on one side of the room and a massi
ve, well-appointed bed on the other. But then, anything would seem luxurious after where he’d been.
As he took a much-longed-for shower to wash away the grime from his ordeal, he replayed Brenna’s earlier words. When humans discovered the existence of vampires, their minds were wiped to prevent word from spreading. Was that what Brenna and her fellow vampires had planned for him—erasing his recollection of the past month? The idea pissed him off. They were shitty memories, but they belonged to him. What would they replace them with? A month was a lot of time to make up. A trip to the mental ward? Being lost in the wilderness? Amnesia? Memories of an alien abduction?
Now that he knew the truth about Brenna, he didn’t want to lose her again. If it hadn’t been for her—both in the cabin and out in the woods with that vampire—he’d very likely be dead right now. He couldn’t believe that the only thing he’d talked about on the way here was how she’d lied to him.
God, he could be such an ass sometimes.
After he finished in the bathroom, he jerked open the door and reentered the bedroom.
Brenna sat cross-legged on the leather loveseat, wearing an oversized T-shirt, her hair pulled into a messy ponytail. She glanced up from her phone as he approached, but her eyes instantly dropped to the towel wrapped around his waist.
Without hesitation, he strode over and pulled her into his arms before she had a chance to protest. Her hair had a slight woodsy scent to it, he noticed as he removed the elastic. It reminded him of the danger she’d put herself into on account of him. He didn’t give a shit whether it unsettled her to be this close. And he sure as hell wasn’t scared of the outcome if it did.
“Thank you for saving my life. Twice.”
She started to say something but he lowered his mouth to hers, forcing her lips even wider. They were soft, luscious. Although he didn’t think he was actually tasting cinnamon now, the memory was so fresh in his mind that he couldn’t be certain. She slipped her arms around his neck.
He wasn’t sure what made him do it, but he ran the tip of his tongue over the edges of her teeth. Her body tensed.
But they were smooth and even, no points to be found.
Brenna might be afraid of what she could do to him, but he wasn’t. In fact, quite the opposite. He rather liked the idea that she had a wild side to her. Imagining her sharp little fangs piercing his skin sent a surge of adrenaline through his system. How often did she feed from other humans? Often enough, he supposed. He gripped her tighter and kissed her deeper. The thought of her being intimate like that with another man, having someone else’s blood in her system, infuriated Finn. He wanted her to get what she needed from him, not from some other bloke.
His erection angled out unabashedly from the gap in the towel now. His balls, loose from the warm water, felt heavier than normal.
What would it feel like? he wondered. La petite mort?
A protest rumbled in her throat, but her arms stayed around his neck. He almost laughed—it was just like it used to be. She was trying to be good and he was trying not to let her.
Grabbing her bottom, he pulled her closer, the feel of her hip against his erection nearly driving him insane with desire. Those thin little panties of hers could easily be removed. He could get her up against the wall, lift her up slightly, then settle her down and he’d be inside her. Just like that.
But no, he had other plans right now.
“You don’t scare me, Bren,” he whispered against her lips.
“I don’t?”
“No, and in the interest of full disclosure and because you say that not being prepared can be dangerous, I think it’s only fair that I let you know what I am about to do.”
“What are you talking about?”
“It’s simple. I’m going to make love to you exactly five minutes from now.”
“No. Seriously, Finn, we can’t.”
“Really?” He lifted the T-shirt over her head, flinging it to the ground, leaving her naked except for her panties. Instead of stepping away, she put her arms right back around his neck, her breasts warm against his bare chest. The disconnect between what she said and what she did only confirmed he was on the right track, so he pressed on.
“In about thirty seconds I’m going to put my mouth right here.” He slid his hand to her breast and gently twisted the nipple between his thumb and forefinger. She sucked in a quick breath and arched herself a little closer. “Or maybe I’ll do this one instead.” He switched to the other breast, lifting it slightly and brushing his thumb over the tip.
“I plan to move my tongue around it first, then I’ll suckle it…gently…until it peaks even further than it is right now.”
Another tiny moan rumbled deep in her throat.
“After that, I’m going to slip one finger, maybe two inside you to see if you’re ready for me yet. My guess is that you will be, but if not, I might prop this leg—” He slid his hand down her hip and gave it a little pat. “—up onto the sofa. That will give me a little better access, but you’ll have to hold yourself steady. Then, I’ll kneel down right here, place my hands on your gorgeous arse and put my mouth on you.”
“Finn, please.” She ran her hands up and down his arms. She was shaking now.
“Depending on how that goes, maybe a minute or two later, I’ll carry you to that bed—the one right there—and pull back the comforter. Then I’ll—”
“Oh for godsake, Finn!” She pushed on his chest, forcing him back, and she moved with him.
The towel dropped to the floor as the edge of the bed came up behind him.
When he fell back onto the mattress, she hurriedly slipped off her panties and was on him in an instant, not waiting for him to pull back the comforter or do it herself.
“Brenna, a condom.” Where was his wallet anyway? Did he still have one tucked in behind his military ID? Or had that freak—
“Unnecessary. An unchanged human can’t get a vampire pregnant.”
At some point, he’d want to know more, but now those details were unimportant. All that mattered was that his body was going to be inside hers in T-minus two seconds. And he planned to show her exactly how much he’d missed her since she’d left him.
She straddled him, her breasts bouncing in his face. But before he could kiss her again or pull a nipple into his mouth, she grabbed the base of his erection, positioned it quickly and promptly eased herself down.
He lifted his hips to meet her as her warmth slid over him. Sighs and moans filled the room, along with a few choice curse words.
Oh God, this was every bit as amazing as it used to be.
Her body. The friction.
So. Damn. Perfect.
He’d been with several women since they’d broken up, mostly during his trip to Scotland. At the weekend pub crawls, he’d never been without female companionship, but now their faces and names all seemed to meld together. Merely placeholders. He’d been hoping they’d help him forget Brenna, but being with them only seemed to emphasize what he no longer had.
Holding on to her hips, he angled himself even deeper, feeling her internal muscles tighten around him. She arched her head back and her hair fell freely about her shoulders now that the hair band was gone.
“Are you having one, Bren?” He didn’t need to ask, he already knew she was climaxing. He just wanted to hear her say it.
“Y-yes,” she said breathlessly, her voice low and sultry.
“You are?”
“Oh my God, yes.”
He lightly slapped her bottom, making more sound than sting. As she cried out and her nails dug into his forearms, a deep sense of pride surged in his chest. Blood type aside, he loved that she found him so pleasurable.
To keep her from seeing the satisfied, know-it-all grin creasing his face, he lifted his head and pulled her nipple into his mouth.
“Finn!” A half laugh, half protest.
He couldn’t tell if she’d seen his smile or not. No matter. He was done playing games.
She was
too tight. The pressure too intense. Every nerve ending too sensitive. He’d waited long enough.
He thrust deeper and let himself go.
The sounds that filled the room were his this time.
But unlike hers, no one within earshot would think they were delicate.
“So all those times we made love using condoms, it was unnecessary?” He propped himself up on one elbow.
Brenna stifled a smile. Men hated condoms, but that was just too bad.
“Technically, yes. But that was when you thought I was…like you. I had to play the part of a responsible human woman. Not only is pregnancy not an issue, but germs and viruses that affect your kind generally don’t affect us, and vice versa.”
“What do you mean by generally?”
She explained to him that prior to the Middle Ages, vampires did feed from and kill their human hosts. When the Black Plague infected the human population with blood fever, vampires contracted it from their blood. Unlike humans, who had a chance to survive it, the disease was always fatal to vampires, and it wiped out much of their small population. As a survival mechanism, they stretched out the times between feedings and were surprised to learn they could go for longer periods by absorbing the necessary energy through physical touch.
“Just as humans’ eating habits have changed since the Middle Ages, so have ours.”
Finn was shaking his head.
“What? Don’t you believe me?”
“I can’t believe you made me wear a condom.”
She laughed, slapped him playfully on the arm before she realized she’d slipped so easily back in to a comfortable rapport with him.
Nothing had changed, though. Things still couldn’t work between the two of them. In fact, their time together was winding to an end, because as soon as Lily debriefed him, Brenna had no doubt that the field office would insist that his memory of everything be wiped from his mind. And that included the time they were spending together right now.
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