by Claire Adams
The press loves a good human interest story.
“Well, to tell you the truth, Charlie,” I start — yeah, I learned the reporter’s name about half an hour ago, “it’s not a walk in the park. It was really nice of Andrew here to come and pay me a visit.”
Andrew looks down at me, still trying to manage the nerve to say something.
“You all need to leave right now,” one of the security guards says.
Everyone starts filing down the hallway, and as quickly as Andrew tries to walk, Mags keeps me right next to him on the way down the hall. We get to the elevator and Andrew presses the button. I motion for him to come close.
“Why don’t we have a little talk on the way down?” I ask.
“You’re out of your mind,” he says.
“Well, either that or it’s you, me, and a few reporters from some of the better circulating newspapers in the country,” I tell him.
The elevator door opens, and Andrew hesitates a moment before going in.
“Just you and your assistant,” he says.
“Mags?” I ask.
She wheels me into the elevator with Andrew, and once the door closes, I get back into it.
“Can you see the headline?” I ask. “Representative from KJBP Runs from Cancer Patient.”
“This isn’t going to work,” he says. “I’m not going to answer any questions.”
“That’s your choice,” I tell him, “but you know the press. If you don’t give them a comment, they’re going to come to their own conclusions.”
“Why are you doing this?” he asks.
“You’ve never met someone who’s got nothing to lose, have you?” I ask. “You may make a deal that’ll get you a big office in a nice, tall building, but those pictures of you coming out of the chemo suite with me in the background all bald and sad-looking are going to be with you pretty much forever. It’s really up to you what the caption beneath them turns out to be.”
“I’m not the fucking station owner,” he says. “I can’t just make this deal without the approval of my-”
“You say the words,” I tell him, “and I’m willing to bet your betters are willing to overlook a zero or two to avoid a public boycott.”
“This isn’t going to work,” he says. “People are going to see through it if you smear me.”
“You know what the one good thing about looking like me right now does for you?” I ask. “It makes people really sympathetic. Now, I’m not usually the type of person that’s looking to exploit my illness to get what I want, but you’re not leaving me much of a choice, now, are you, Andrew?”
“This isn’t going to work,” he says.
He says that right up until we come out of the elevator and he sees the cameras waiting out front.
“It’s up to you,” I tell him. “Today, you can either be the hero to your company’s bank account or you can make KJBP the station that cares. Do me a favor and give your boss a call. I’m willing to bet he says that a positive image is better for the growth of a company than a fatter bankroll.”
Actually, I’m betting his boss is going to say the exact opposite. I’m not delusional.
Luckily for me, though, Andrew doesn’t know any better.
This is almost too easy.
“I don’t know what I would say even if I did go along with it,” he says.
“Mags?” I ask, and my lovely assistant pulls a folder from her oversized purse and hands it to me.
“I took the liberty of preparing a statement for you,” I tell him. “I think you’ll find it rather flattering to you and your bosses. By the way, Mags, did you tell them to turn on their televisions? They’re probably going to want to see this.”
This shouldn’t work, and if I were talking to anyone with more experience handling the press, it wouldn’t. Andrew, though, seems to think that the media cares a lot more about this sort of thing than they actually do.
I may have forgotten to mention that to him...
“This is going to get me fired,” he says. “I can’t turn down better deals from bigger companies just to try to avoid some personal embarrassment. I don’t know who you think I am, but my job is to do what’s best for the company.”
“They sent you out here with real bargaining rights, didn’t they?” I ask. “What were the terms of your acceptance?”
“Take your offer and multiply it by about 50,” he says. “Do you really think a shot of me walking out of this building without giving you a deal is going to outweigh half a billion dollars?”
Actually, no, I don’t. This is a fool’s errand, and the most likely scenario is that I participate in humiliating a somewhat decent guy doing what anyone in his position would do.
“I think you’re more concerned with your public image than you think,” I tell him. “I think you know that even if you do go for your half a billion, you’re not going to have a job waiting for you when you get back there. They’ll tell you that it’s just politics and they’ll blame me for it just like you will, but they’re not going to be able to keep you on when that video’s playing over and over again on the internet.”
“You think I’m going to make a deal with you just to preserve my job at KJBP?” he asks. “Do you really think they’re not going to fire me if I throw away 490 million dollars?”
“Oh, they’re probably going to fire you either way,” I tell him. “If you go out there and read this, it’ll probably be your last act as an employee of KJBP, but the damage will be done and they’ll fold. They’ll have to because you made the deal. They might try to weasel out of it, but that doesn’t matter. We may not be big yet, but we’ve still got about a dozen lawyers more than you do. No matter what you do, you’re going to get fired, but read this and I think we might be able to find something for you at M.E.”
“This is blackmail. This isn’t remotely legal.”
“What are they going to do, throw me in jail?” I ask, and give out a nice, wet cough just for effect.
If Andrew opens his mouth, they’re absolutely going to throw me in jail. I’m not a month or two from the scythe; I’ve still got about another decade at least — assuming the treatment doesn’t kill me faster than the disease.
“Come on,” I tell him. “This is the deal that’s going to give you and KJBP a good name in the biggest market that you’ve ever known. There’s not another deal in the world that’s going to give you that.”
If you pay attention to the world of business, you’ll find that having a good name is one of the least important things there is. A bad name can be offset by good PR, and people have always respected power more than they’ve respected honor or decency — not to say that what I’m trying to do to Andrew is either honorable or decent.
There’s an easy out for him if he knew enough to use it: he could go out there and say a few words that would be respectful, but noncommittal. If he were to go out there and tell the press that he’s been working with me for years and that he’s going to see what he can do to sell a deal with his board and from there, all he’d have to do is wait for the big money announcement.
Nobody’s going to remember him in a week, no matter what he chooses to do.
Luckily for me, he’s too flustered at the sight of the cameras outside to think about any of that.
“And if I just go out the back?” he asks.
“They’ll track you down. I’ll make sure of that.” I turn to Mags, saying, “When do you think the reporters from upstairs are going to get down here?”
“Seriously, why are you doing this to me?” he asks.
“Just trying to help convince you to do the right thing,” I tell him.
There is no reason for him to go for what I’m offering, but after laying it on this thick, there’s just the slightest chance that he might do the dumb thing and give me exactly what I want.
“I thought you were better than this, Grace,” he says.
“I’m just a dying woman who’s been working on this too long to see it fall by the ways
ide. So, are we going to do a joint press conference or are you going to try and Mission Impossible it out the back?”
He takes a minute to think.
“They’re never going to abide by this,” he says. “Even if I go out there and do everything you want me to do, they’re never going to abide by it. You don’t have the clout.”
“Bet your career on that?” I ask him.
I wouldn’t. In fact, I seriously doubt KJBP would even fire him for the string of bad publicity I’ve got planned — call it spite — should he do what any responsible representative would do.
“Fine,” he says. “I’ll read it, but if KJBP doesn’t go for it, I won’t have you dragging me through the shit for it.”
“You go out there and read that,” I tell him, “and you’ve got a job at Memento no matter which way it goes from there.”
That was the only perk I’ve been able to squeeze out in addition to the 10 mil offer.
Even though Andrew is right, KJBP is never going to stand by this deal, it’s still a personal victory to follow him outside and sit there, however wiped I am from the chemo, and hear him read the prepared statement saying that KJBP will soon be a subsidiary of M.E.
What I’ve neglected to tell Andrew is that when this deal falls through, I’m going to lose my own job. That’s just the position I’m in. My job was over the moment a member of our board mentioned the names of some of the biggest stations in the world.
People love an underdog story, but only if the underdog wins in the end. I have no chance of that. Human interest pieces are great, but people have a short attention span for this kind of thing and nobody’s going to care.
This isn’t going to change anything, and when KJBP announces that they’re going with whoever they end up going with, I’m going to lose my job.
What I do have is this moment, seeing the high water mark of my career. What’s ruining the whole thing is that Jace isn’t here to see it.
Chapter Twenty
Compacted Life
Jace
I’m sitting outside the room where my fate is to be decided, taking one more minute to go over my prepared remarks.
There are going to be plenty of questions, plenty of ways for me to explain exactly why and how I did what I did, though I doubt Dr. Marcum’s name will ever come up at all.
I would have loved nothing more than to have Grace’s support for what I’m about to do, but the simple fact is that she’s not here and she’s not going to be.
“Dr. Churchill?” Dr. Preston calls from the now open doorway. “We’re ready for you.”
I stand and straighten my tie. There’s probably nothing of consequence they don’t already know, but that doesn’t make this hearing redundant. It matters what I say in there and it’s going to matter just as much how I say it.
If I play it off like it wasn’t a big deal or that I didn’t really do anything wrong, they’re going to skewer me. This isn’t the kind of thing they tell you might become a problem when they’re doing what they can to pound the ethical code of conduct down your throat in med school; this is the kind of thing you know before you’re sitting in the class.
I sit down across the table from Dr. Preston.
To his left and right are board members and department heads, all members of the disciplinary committee. I know them all personally. That doesn’t mean this is going to be any easier.
From left to right, there’s Dr. Quinten, who I’m going to push into hating me for the fact that I violated the terms of a clinical study, something that’s big money for the hospital.
Next to him is Dr. Star, who’s going to soften a bit at the fact that I did this for a woman I care about, but she’s going to overcorrect her judgment so the others don’t catch on to her sympathies, something she considers a weakness.
In the middle is Dr. Preston, Dean of Medicine and a man who hasn’t stopped staring at me like he’s trying to figure out how much money his hospital can save by revoking my license and kicking me the hell out of it.
To the right of him is Dr. Jepsen, who’s one of those people you always think is on your side, right up until the moment he opens his mouth to let you know just how little he thinks of you — I’m pretty sure for no other reason than that he can.
Finally, we have Dr. Belkin, Grace’s doctor when she was brought in here after her first seizure. He’s difficult to read, but from what I know of him, I wouldn’t be surprised if he takes it personally that the doctor who assumed treatment of his patient could have made such a stupid mistake.
All in all, I think it’s pretty safe to say that I’m fucked.
“We’re meeting this morning in order to determine what, if any, disciplinary action would be appropriate for Dr. Jace Churchill,” Dr. Preston starts. “The committee has looked over the allegations surrounding your case, Dr. Churchill, and we are prepared to hear your testimony if you’d like to begin.”
“Grace Miller, the patient in question, was initially referred to me by Dr. Belkin. She came into the hospital after an idiopathic seizure. When it was discovered that she had an oligodendroglioma, she was referred into my care,” I start.
“Dr. Churchill, at that time, were you aware that there was a clinical trial that would be starting within the months following your initial contact with your patient?” Dr. Belkin asks.
And I thought I was going to be able to get through my initial statement before they set about crucifying me. “No,” I answer, “it was some time thereafter that I was sent an email discussing the trial.”
“Go on,” Dr. Preston prompts.
“When I did find out about the clinical trial, I began to consider the possibility that some of my patients may benefit from their inclusion,” I continue.
Dr. Belkin interrupts again, “How many patients of yours have oligodendroglioma?”
“I’m sure that’s in the file,” I tell him.
“Do you not know how many patients of yours have oligodendroglioma?” Dr. Belkin asks again.
“I have three patients with the condition,” I answer. “The first has phase three of the condition and thus wouldn’t be permitted entry into the clinical trial. The second patient was admitted in good faith and meets all criteria. The third, Grace, has phase two oligodendroglioma, and although she doesn’t meet the duration criteria, I thought her inclusion in the trial might have a positive impact on her prognosis.”
“You were aware at the time that you were putting forth an invalid candidate?” Dr. Quinten asks.
“I was,” I answer.
“Didn’t it strike you as a grave risk to yourself, to the patient, and to this hospital, not to mention to the results of the study to put forward a patient that didn’t meet the requirements of that study?” Dr. Quinten pursues.
“I was aware of the risks.”
“I’m not just speaking of the professional risks, Dr. Churchill,” Dr. Quinten continues. “The girl could have had an unforeseen reaction, or she could have skewed the results of the study, potentially preventing a helpful drug from being approved or even enabling a dangerous drug to slip through the cracks. Do you understand this?”
“I don’t think that a single patient in a clinical trial-” I start.
“Did you or did you not understand the risks apart from those to your professional status?” Dr. Quinten asks.
This isn’t going so well.
“I understood all of the risks regarding what I was planning to do,” I answer.
“Then why did you do it?” Dr. Star asks.
I’m about to gain her sympathy, but I’m going to just as quickly lose any chance of her voting for leniency.
“I had become quite fond of this patient, and I wanted to go the extra mile to ensure she had every chance she could to live a longer, happier life,” I answer. “I was advocating for my patient.”
There’s only one way this next part can go, and it’s going there quickly.
“You were having a sexual relationship with this pat
ient prior to her admission to the trial, is that not true?” Dr. Jepsen asks.
“Not at the time she was accepted into the trial,” I answer.
“But you were having a sexual relationship with her before the commencement of the clinical trial?” Dr. Star asks.
I hesitate, but it’s a useless flourish. “Yes,” I answer.
I can see the look in Dr. Star’s eyes when it becomes clear I did this because I really care for Grace, but as predicted, just as quickly as I see the look, she sees me looking at her and the expression changes completely.
“So, you’re admitting to having an inappropriate relationship with your patient before the clinical trial began?” Dr. Star asks.
“Whether or not it’s appropriate isn’t my call to make, but I was having a relationship with Grace Miller before the trial began, yes,” I answer.
“Would the American Medical Association call your relationship with the patient inappropriate?” Dr. Star asks.
“I believe so, yes.”
“That’s all I need to know,” Dr. Star says, and tries to play down the fact that she’s looking for signs of approval from her fellow committee members.
I was hoping that she wouldn’t be so predictable.
“I think that the matter is clear enough as it is, but I would like to ask if you have any regret for what you’ve done,” Dr. Belkin asks.
“I’m sorry, could you repeat the question?”
“Do you feel any kind of remorse for the way you’ve so brazenly defied AMA codes of conduct, the policies of this hospital, and the requirements of the clinical trial?” Dr. Belkin asks.
This might be the only way in which I’m able to persuade anyone on the committee to show leniency. The first thing that anyone in the world wants is power, and people love nothing more than having someone approach them on hands and knees to beg forgiveness.
Maybe I’m just cynical.
“No,” I answer. “If given the opportunity, I would absolutely do it again.”
“Excuse me?” Dr. Quinten asks.
“I would do it again,” I repeat. “We have so much stacked against us so often in our profession, and if I were to have the chance to possibly turn the tide for one of my patients in the future — any of my patients — I doubt that I would hesitate to try to find a way to afford them that chance.”