by Maggie Ryan
Ashley turned on Traci with a look of horror. "Gee, thanks a lot!"
"Sorry, kiddo, but it's true."
"Let's have a toast to welcome Traci to our home for dinner tonight." They raised their glasses to clink together before each tasting a sip.
"Hmmm. This is a bit sweeter than you usually go, Dad."
"Very good. I wondered if you'd notice."
"Yes, I like it."
Traci added her approval. "I like it too. Where is it from?"
"It's a Moscato from California. I noticed you didn't drink much of the dry Riesling at dinner last night and thought I'd try something a bit fruitier tonight."
"Thanks, but the wine was fine last night. Maybe I was just trying not to overindulge and make a fool of myself on our first date."
"Ah, so you wanted me to drink too much and make a fool of myself on our first date?"
"Better you than me!"
The three shared a goodhearted laugh. They spent the next hour in easy conversation while fighting to horde portions of their favorite dishes. Traci hadn't thought it was possible to have more fun with Sean than she had the night before, but tonight's dinner with Ashley included was even more perfect. Her subconscious kept trying to remind her that this was just temporary, but she tried to push the disappointment down. Even if she never saw Sean and Ashley after Friday, she wanted to enjoy her time with them now while she could.
"So, do you know how to ski, Traci? I mean living in Colorado, I bet you've got some great ski slopes near you."
"You bet. I'm pretty good. My brother, Troy, is the best skier I know. He used to ski competitively when he was younger."
"I've always wanted to learn how to ski."
"Hey, I offered to take you skiing last winter when we were in Utah. You turned me down."
Ashley gave her father an incredulous look. "Dad. You forget. I've seen you water ski. No offense, but I don't want you teaching me to snow ski."
"I resent that. I'm a decent skier and you can't possibly compare the two. I had never water-skied before that day and your Uncle Jim was a terrible driver of the boat. He wouldn't maintain enough speed to help me out at all."
"Sure, Dad. Whatever you say."
Traci loved listening to their playful banter, although several times tonight she'd almost felt like an outsider. "Well, I'd be happy to teach you to ski, Ashley, if you ever make it out to Colorado."
"Can we, Dad? Can we visit Traci this winter and go skiing?"
An awkward silence descended on them for the first time since Traci arrived. Sean looked at Traci with intensity. They'd known each other for such a short time that to make plans to vacation together seemed a bit ridiculous.
"I think that's an awesome idea, Ashley. As long as Traci doesn't mind, that is."
"I'd love to have you both come to Colorado for a visit."
"I think we should play a board game!"
Sean groaned. "Ashley, I don't think so."
"You always say that. I bet Traci likes board games."
"I love board games."
"Great, now I'm getting ganged up on by the two of you."
"So what's a board game you do like, Sean?"
"One that stays in a box."
"He's teasing. He always complains before we start, but once we get going, he loves to play as much as I do."
"Fine. If we must, I vote for Chinese Checkers."
"You always vote for Chinese Checkers, Dad."
"You asked."
Traci interjected. "I love Chinese Checkers too. It's been years since I've played."
"Okay, but next time I get to pick."
Ashley headed down a hallway to her bedroom. As soon as she was out of sight, Sean leaned close to kiss Traci's cheek. "I can't believe how well tonight is going. I hope you're having fun too."
"Are you kidding me? I'm having a wonderful time. Ashley is amazing, Sean. You're doing a great job with her."
"I'm surprised, honestly. She's been kind of down lately. She must feel better tonight. I was worried my dating might be hard on her, but maybe I was wrong."
Ashley was back with the game and the three of them played three games. The girls swept up with Ashley winning twice and Traci once. At least Sean wasn't a sore loser.
"Well, I have some homework to do. I have a quiz to study for, so I think I'll call it a night." Ashley had picked up the game. Her father raised an eyebrow in surprise. Traci suspected Ashley volunteering to do her homework wasn't a normal event in the Campbell household.
Traci stood to hug Ashley and was suddenly melancholy at the possibility of never seeing her again. As they separated, Traci could see the same fear on Ashley's face. She had to be strong. "It was awesome to meet you, Ashley. I sure hope I get to see you more before I leave Chicago, but if I don't, I'll be waiting for you to come for your skiing lessons next winter."
"That's great. I'll look forward to it. Night."
"Night."
After she was out of sight, Sean stood to hug Traci. "All right spill it. How the hell did you get her to drop her impenetrable teenage angst shield for a whole night?"
"I don't know what you're talking about. We just hit is off."
Sean hugged tighter and when she refused to answer, he began to playfully tickle her. "I know you have some trick up your sleeve, Traci. Ah, I see you're ticklish. You'd better be careful. If you won't tell me your secret, I might have to spank the truth out of you, although you'd probably like that."
The second the words were out of Sean's mouth they both froze. Time stood still as the room started to spin for Traci. She tried to think rationally, but his off-handed comment had caught her with her guard down. It had been a direct hit. Before she could think through the implications, she pushed away from him, spinning to confront Sean.
Traci went on offense. She worked to keep her voice low enough to avoid Ashley hearing. "I knew this was too good to be true. I expect Robert Meyer to say shit like that. He likes to take pot shots at my research topic, but not you, Sean. I can't believe you're going to ridicule me, too."
She could feel tears forming and knew she needed to get the hell out of there. She spun towards the door and had her hand on the doorknob before she said her parting words. "Goodbye, Sean."
Chapter 5
Sean was so shocked by his own words that he was slow to recognize how badly he'd just hurt Traci. She was already at the door when he sprang into action. The door was open several inches by the time he reacted. He reached around Traci's shoulders to slam the door closed with a crash, trapping Traci between him and the hard wood. As if he didn't feel like a big enough asshole for his careless comment, her answering sob as she melted into tears wrenched his stomach into knots.
Time to grovel.
"Traci, I'm so sorry. Please believe me, the last thing I was trying to do was poke fun at you or your research. You have to believe me, honey. We were just goofing around and it sort of came out."
Her quiet tears were his only answer. He pressed closer and brought his hands down to pull her into his arms, but she remained stiff and closed off.
"Please don't go. Come back in so we can talk." She didn't answer, but he could feel her relaxing into his arms. She still didn't answer him.
Sean said some of the things he'd been thinking of all day since listening to her presentation. He wished he could see her eyes, but maybe it was better this way. Less chance of him losing his nerve.
Sean launched into a speech he'd practiced in his head all afternoon. "I wanted to confess to you that I was shocked when I realized what your specialty area was. All of the talk of domestic discipline... punishments... spankings... well it did catch me off-guard, but never... not once... did I think it was silly. In fact, as I listened, there were many parts that really resonated with me."
Traci had relaxed against him, but didn't move to face him. He almost missed her quiet question. "Which parts?"
"Sorry?"
"Which parts resonated with you?"
Relief flooded Se
an that she was talking with him. "The parts about the importance of communication and intimacy in relationships. And especially the parts about trust between partners and how domestic discipline can help to make sure couples don't keep secrets or tell lies. Unfortunately, I know firsthand how that destroys the intimacy in a relationship."
Sean hadn't meant to get so personal tonight, but considering she was contemplating leaving, he figured he better lay it on the line. Traci took her time before asking quietly, "Do you want to talk about it?"
"Are you asking as a therapist or my date?"
She finally turned in his arms to lock her tear-filled eyes on him. "Can't I be both?"
Sean led them to the couch that faced the bank of windows to the west. The sun was just setting against the backdrop of skyscrapers. He sat first, pulling Traci down into his lap. They were about to have an intimate conversation and felt the need to hold her. She leaned in tight to his chest so he didn't need to look into her eyes. It would be easier that way.
"I loved my wife very much, Traci. Most of the time we were very happy, but our marriage was not without its problems. Ironically, when we were just starting out, she did well living within a budget, but as I got promotions and started making more money, she sort of ran amok with her shopping. At first I thought she was just trying to keep up with the Joneses, but over time I started catching her in lies about her spending. I'd find bills for things I had no idea how she'd paid for. Her closet was full of clothes with tags on, never worn. We'd argue about it constantly. She'd promise she'd try harder, but it never stuck. Then she got sick and well, all of the money problems didn't seem to matter as much anymore. The thing that hit me today as I listened to you talking wasn't so much about how spanking might have changed her behavior. It was the part about knowing how ashamed of herself she was. I know she felt guilty that she couldn't stop her spending and I felt so helpless. I didn't know how to help her."
As he finished, Sean felt a huge weight figuratively leaving his shoulders. He'd held in his anger at Jerilyn for so long, knowing it was pointless to carry the anger and knowing he had failed her by not being able to help her.
"So, you're wondering if spanking her might have helped?"
"We'll never know, but yes. I wonder if it could have helped us. I strongly doubt she would have ever consented to letting me spank her. I might have felt better, though."
"No, you wouldn't have. You would have only felt guilty yourself if you spanked her without her consent."
Sean decided to ask the million-dollar question. "How about you, Traci? Do you believe in practicing what you study? Would you ever consent to corporal punishment?"
She was trembling in his arms so he held her tighter, stroking her bare arm lightly to maintain their connection. A full minute of silence passed before she answered quietly.
"It's not a simple question with a yes or no answer. Are you asking me to answer you professionally or personally?"
"I'm not interested in your professional services, Traci. I want to know what you want—what you need—to be happy."
"Well, for starters, I need more than three days." There was a manic quality to her voice and he knew she was feeling as raw and on edge as he was.
He separated them so he could look into her beautiful brown eyes. She looked so vulnerable. Sean wanted to wrap her in bubble wrap to protect her from ever getting hurt. "Trace, can't we set that aside for a few minutes?"
"I can't, Sean. It's hanging over our heads. I don't do one-night-stands and a three-night-stand, well that seems even worse. You live in Chicago. I live in Colorado. We are at different places in our lives. This was just supposed to be fun. I don't know how we got so serious so fast, but I really do think it might be best if I left now."
Sean pushed down his panic. Every single word Traci had said was one-hundred percent accurate, and yet his gut was telling him to hang on to her. They had met for a reason and he wasn't ready to just turn his back on that yet.
"Traci, do you respect me? Trust me?"
"Yes, I do."
"Then please, give us half a chance. Don't leave. Not yet."
She held her breath. Sean cupped her face in his hands and looked into her eyes, trying to let her see just how much he wanted her to stay. "I don't want to get hurt again, Sean. I haven't had the best luck in the men department."
"I promise you, I'm not out to hurt you. In fact, I feel like I'm supposed to be protecting you. I about decked that asshole today when he stood up to heckle you. I was so proud of you and how you handled him, but if he had persisted, I was going to barge out there and throw him out of the hotel."
That got her smiling again. "You wouldn't have."
"Damn straight I would have. I don't know what the hell his problem is, but he came very close to finding himself on the streets today."
Her smile was gone. She looked conflicted. She finally spoke. "Robert and I dated briefly last year. It's men like him that are the reason I find it hard to trust you, Sean. The second Robert found out about my field of study, I became the focus of his ridicule. There are so many people who don't understand. Add to it that he has the maturity of a ten-year-old and it was a recipe for disaster."
"Wait. You dated that asshole?"
"Sometimes I'm not as smart as I look."
"Hey, enough of that. I've noticed you like to put yourself down. I don't like it."
"Now you sound like my brother, Troy."
"Smart man. I'm glad to know I have help to remind you how amazing you are. In fact, that would be one of my first rules... you know... if we were... "
"If we were what?" She looked hopeful.
"If you were mine, Traci, rule number one would be that you had to stop putting yourself down and thinking the worst of yourself. You had yourself almost paralyzed with fear over this presentation and look how great it turned out."
Her breathing became shallow. He didn't put it together at first, but as he watched her brown eyes dilate and felt her starting to wiggle in his lap, he began to understand where Traci's thoughts had drifted. He decided to test his theory. "Would you like to know what would happen if I caught you putting yourself down, Traci?"
"I'm not sure."
He brushed a stray hair from her face and placed it behind her ear as he watched her reaction. "Oh I think you know, don't you? I'd have to take you over my knee and warm up this beautiful ass of yours that I've been feeling up through your dress every chance I get. I have a confession."
"What's that?" It was barely a whisper.
"I've always been an ass man. All this talk about corporal punishment and thinking of you submitting to spankings has had me turned on all day. Maybe that's not the way DD is supposed to work, but I can't help it."
"Actually, that's exactly the way DD is supposed to work. That's part of the intimacy."
"So you don't think I'm an ogre for wanting to learn more about your area of expertise? Maybe try this whole spanking thing out?"
"Are you kidding me? I never thought you'd be into it at all."
"Let's be clear. I'm not one-hundred percent sure that I am. All I know is I'm curious and I'm willing to try."
"You'd do that? For me?"
"I want to be with you, Traci."
That had obviously been the right thing to say. Traci leaned forward and allowed him to capture her in a kiss. Sean's hand brushed her breast, which dragged a long moan from her lips. He palmed her through her dress and bra and enjoyed how she filled his large hand perfectly. He felt her hardened nipple straining to escape the confines of her clothing.
Traci ground against his lap and caused the best kind of torture with friction against his rock-hard cock. She had to feel it under her as they continued to kiss passionately.
They eventually came up for air, both breathless as they stayed pressed together at their foreheads, each struggling to slow things down.
Sean spoke first. "I'm sorry, but Ashley is just down the hall."
"Don't apologize. I underst
and. We need to set a good example."
"Right. I mean we can't... at least not here."
"But... maybe..."
"It is a hotel, after all."
They both jumped to their feet, urgent to relocate. They were in the elevator in less than a minute and once there, Sean pulled her into his arms again. He was unwilling to wait the few extra minutes before resuming where they had left off.
After his lips reclaimed Traci's, he pulled back abruptly. "Damn."
Panic filled her beautiful face. "What?" He could read her. She thought he was having second thoughts.
"I just remembered the elevators are monitored in security."
Traci started to pull away. She assumed he wanted to maintain propriety, so when he let his hands roam from her waist to cup each of her ass cheeks through her dress, she was confused. "Sean?"
"Hey, if they're going to gossip about me, we might as well give them something juicy to talk about." He captured her lips in an open-mouth, tongue-swapping kiss. They only came up for air when the elevator dinged their arrival at Traci's floor.
Sean led her by the hand, taking her key to unlock the door. They stepped into her room and the door slammed behind them. It provided them with the first real private moment of their entire relationship. An unwelcome wave of uncertainty hit Sean. It had nothing to do with Traci. In fact, she was the only reason he was willing to even fight through his discomfort. She was worth it.
She noticed the change in his demeanor. "Sean?" Her one word question betrayed how vulnerable she was making herself. It eased his own worry.
"Come here, you." He pulled her into his arms. They hadn't made it past the entrance of the dimly lit room.
They calmed as they held each other. He felt the need to explain his concerns. "I'm sorry if I got spooked there for a minute. It's just... well I'm a bit nervous. I'm really out of practice at this."
Traci hugged him tightly. "Me too." That made him happy.
Sean needed to lighten the mood. He leaned back so he could look into her eyes. "You know what they say, don't you?"
"What?"
He couldn't hold back his playful grin. "Practice makes perfect."