“I’m referring to your deficient mental capacity and inferior physical nature, earthling.” He hissed the last word with scathing contempt.
“Calm down, the both of you,” Lorkin barked. “What Odo means is we prefer not to contaminate our race.”
“Oh yes, that sounds so much better,” she drawled.
“Was I misinformed of your desire to leave Primaria? You’re happy and wish to remain here with Ramikin as a mate?”
Again, at a loss on how to play it, she stammered, “No, I mean, yes… I don’t know.” And she didn’t. She wasn’t happy, not as it stood now. She wanted him, but only if he wanted her, not because of the baby. Holy crap, what a mess.
“I must know. Did he breach you? Have you bonded?”
“Why is that relevant?”
“Answer the question,” he growled, not seeming to care they stood on a public walkway where anyone could hear.
“There is no bond,” Odo stated. “She admitted as much to me today. And she has not transformed.”
“You sent him today to test me,” she accused, the weird scrutiny he’d given her earlier now making sense.
“Before I approached, I had to make sure.” From his robe, he withdrew a folded piece of paper. “I also retrieved this.”
Eryn knew right away what it was. He held it out to her, but she couldn’t take it. Not again.
He shook it at her and hissed, “Take it.”
She shook her head stubbornly.
His lips flattened in the middle of his bushy gray beard, clearly annoyed. “It’s your compatibility test. Aren’t you curious?”
“I just want to go home.”
“Stupid, insipid female,” Odo muttered under his breath, which earned him another scowl from her.
“The score reported to Master Ram was in error, deliberately inflated so he would claim you for his mate,” Lorkin explained.
“Why would someone do that?” A good question she wondered about to this day.
“Morale was low among our people and hope fading. Then, we found you Earth females, very similar to us in appearance and some of you showed favorable compatibility results. We don’t believe the ratings were as promising as initially reported, and think the scores were inflated to sway the people to support this ill-fated plan. If all the females in the sample matched, it seemed predestined for our two species to join.”
“And I was an outlier who put their plan at risk.”
“Yes. You and a few others.”
“Who would do this? Your Princep?”
Lorkin and Odo glanced at one another.
“Perhaps, but we aren’t certain yet,” the elder said.
An interesting theory. But one major flaw discounted their supposition, however. It was dead wrong. When transformations started happening, and mate markings started popping up, not to mention the pregnancies she knew would follow, they would realize it. Like the protesters on Earth, xenophobes couldn’t accept something different, even for the sake of their own survival.
He waved the paper closer to her face. Because he looked ready to pop a blood vessel in his head, she took it. When she unfolded it, the shadows made it too dark to read, so she acted as if she did to move things along—she knew what it said, after all.
Blowing out an exasperated breath, the elder muttered, “Most obstinate creatures ever,” and dragged her a few yards up the walkway to the next streetlight. By angling it just right, she could make out the word incompatible in bold print. The truth knocked the breath out of her as it had the first time. Pregnancy aside, they hadn’t bonded, she didn’t transform, and they weren’t mates.
“What’s your plan?” she asked, humoring him to get this over with.
Voices and footsteps from nearby had his head whipping around. Several people had left the capital center and moved in their direction.
“Not here.” Grabbing her arm again, he moved her down the shadowed street. “I will explain at Master Ram’s residence. We must hurry before he returns.”
Once again, they dragged her along with them through the dark streets of Ariad. In a few blocks, they reached the residential section. By then, having to take two steps to their one, Eryn had a hard time catching her breath.
“Lights up,” Lorkin barked as they swept through the entry of Ram’s home and into the front room. Feet throbbing—her beautiful dainty shoes not intended for sprinting on city streets—she limped across the room and sank onto the couch.
After kicking off her sandals, she rubbed the circulation back into her pinched swollen toes. Why couldn’t she have normal dreams like everyone else? Lounging on a warm, sandy beach, while she sipped a fruity drink with an umbrella, a gorgeous man who could be Ram’s twin rubbing oil on her skin. Because what was the point of a lucid dream if she couldn’t use it or control it?
Eryn closed her eyes, willing the nightmare to stop and for her to wake anywhere other than here. When she cracked open one eye and checked, nothing had changed. The Odo and Lorkin Shit Show continued.
They stared at her like she’d lost her mind.
“Is something wrong with you?” Odo inquired, rude as ever. “You don’t look good.”
“Yes,” she grumbled. “You’re still here. And you’re not winning a beauty contest any time soon, either.”
“Stop it. The two of you are like children,” Lorkin snapped. “And Odo is right. You’re flushed, sweaty.” He grimaced. “And you’re breathing fast.”
“You try doing double-time on city streets in heels and see how you feel,” she bit back. “Now, you mentioned something about being in a hurry. Ram will be home soon.”
“Yes, which means we don’t have time for any more of your bickering.” He glared pointedly at Odo then addressed her again. “There are others who feel as we do. We are a small group, so it will take all of us to pull this off. The plan is to send you back to your ship tomorrow.”
“How?”
“You don’t need all the details, other than we’ll have someone at the controls at the transport center to send you directly onto your ship.”
“With the new arrivals, there are three hundred.”
“We are aware. Your job is to help my people round up all the females, convincing any frightened or undecided holdouts they need to go back. Once you’re all onboard, we will disable the scanners and alarm systems so your ship can get away undetected. What happens after will be up to you.”
“Getting away won’t be easy. Ram doesn’t let me out of his sight or leave me unguarded.”
“We heard you could be troublesome,” Odo sneered, “and planned for that, too.” He held up a vial. “Ensure he drinks this.”
Although not a new twist, it still shocked her, and the same words rolled out of her mouth. “You expect me to poison him?” The idea caused her stomach to roil.
“It is a harmless sleeping potion,” Lorkin assured her. “A few drops and he should be out for hours.”
“Ram is a large man. Double the dose to be sure,” Odo advised.
Eryn shot him a disgusted look. “You’re one of his warriors. Would you see your leader harmed?”
“Better that than breeding with an animal.”
She’d had enough of him and jumped to her feet. “If I’m an animal, you’re a two-legged cretin with shit for brains, asshole!”
He growled and started forward. Though in a gown and barefoot, she took a fighting stance, ready to defend herself. She might take a beating, but she would enjoy getting a few good licks in first. A fist to the throat, her thumbs gouging his eyes, or a hard kick to the groin should do it.
“Enough!” the elder roared, stepping in between them. “This gets us nowhere. Are you in agreement with our plan, Earth female, or must we seek out another?”
The suggestion intrigued her. “You’d move on, after revealing this to me?”
“He did not say that, foolish woman. If you refuse, you deal with me,” the hulking warrior replied, his expression full of wicked intent. Eryn d
idn’t need him to elaborate. And she’d rather not find out what happened to the real Eryn if she died in one of these crazy lucid dreams.
“You really are barbarians,” she whispered.
“We do what we must for our people, as you will do for yours, tomorrow.”
He put the vial in her hand, and she took it, not about to give Odo the Ogre cause to follow through on the painful death he had planned for her.
“Now sit and I’ll go over a few other key details.”
She sat and listened, anything to get them out of Ram’s home and out of her head.
20
“It’s been two weeks.”
After her dream shifted and sent her spiraling upward through the black-and-gray mists, Ram’s voice was the first sound she heard. His words were strained and reflected his weariness. Despite the toll her illness was taking on him, Eryn found relief in his presence.
It lasted only a moment, however, then the burning in her chest returned, as did the rawness in her throat from the interminable breathing tube. She had hoped, and prayed, when she returned it wouldn’t be to the hospital, but here she was again, the ventilator beeping and whooshing away. Despite its efforts, she couldn’t catch her breath, the tightness and pressure in her lungs making her feel like she was starving for air—nothing short of torture.
“She’s getting worse, isn’t she, Juna?”
“Her response isn’t what I’d hoped for, no. I think we need to consider your physic’s treatment.”
A chair squeaked on the floor. “It is risky,” Ram replied, his voice more distinct—he’d moved closer. “What are the chances it will work, Ellar?”
“I can’t make any predictions, since it’s never been tried on a human. With Primarians, it is almost always successful.”
“Almost always. What happens when it isn’t?”
A long silence followed.
“She could die.” Ram’s grim statement answered his own question.
“Yes. In her condition, that is a risk,” Ellar acknowledged. “But what we’re doing isn’t helping. And she can’t wait until the new equipment arrives. It could be months.”
“How soon can you begin?” The weight of the decision rang in the raspy tenor of his words.
“Right away. I have the serum prepared. It works quickly if it’s going to.”
Ram’s “do it” came with quiet emphasis.
A few moments later, a warm sensation started in her chest and spread throughout her body. She’d swear her blood tingled as the serum coursed through her veins. She tried to relax and focus on her breathing.
Except for an occasional whisper, the others in the room remained quiet, but the tension grew palpable. Although surrounded by people, she felt alone and scared.
Seeming to sense her distress, a warm hand squeezed her fingers firmly in reassurance.
Ram.
Though he didn’t speak, and she couldn’t see him, she knew. Not from the slight roughness of his skin or the way his much bigger hand engulfed hers. She just knew. And she welcomed his touch, the comfort it provided, and would have given anything to be able to give him a little squeeze in return.
Time crept by, and bit by bit the tingling warmth increased. She began to sweat, the sheet beneath her growing wet as the temperature of her blood turned into an unbearable heat, like she was boiling inside.
“She’s burning up,” Ram announced at about the same time.
“The flushing and fever are normal,” Ellar advised.
“Are her teeth chattering normal as well?”
“She’s chilling. It’s almost like a blood reaction.” Juna’s voice held a twinge of concern.
“That is exactly what it is. The Valencia herb combined with a mate’s DNA will boost the immune system into a hyper-state of healing. She will get Ram’s help in fighting off this ailment. His blood is the key.”
“Remarkable,” Juna murmured.
“It is one of the many benefits of the mate bond. If they weren’t a match and so highly compatible, the hemolytic reaction could have dire, perhaps fatal results.”
It took Eryn a moment to comprehend what the physic meant. “No!”
What had they done?
She and Ram weren’t highly compatible, far from it, which meant their blood wouldn’t be. She had told Juna repeatedly they hadn’t bonded. Couldn’t they see she hadn’t transformed? They called themselves doctors, were they blind? And why had Ram gone along with it, when he knew better than anyone?
Again, she would be an anomaly, an outlier, the one in however many that failed, a statistic in a column no one ever wanted to be included in.
As her temperature rose, her mind whirled at a dizzying rate. Her breathing became more labored and the awful burning in her chest worsened. She thought her lungs would explode if she couldn’t take a deep breath soon.
An alarm began to shriek.
“What have you done to her, old man?” Ram demanded in a panicked voice.
“It always gets worse before it gets better.”
“Don’t you think this would have been information to give me ahead of time?”
“I’m sorry, Ram. I should have warned you, but we never know what to expect.”
Something icy settled over top of her.
“What is that?” he demanded.
“A cooling blanket,” Juna advised. “It will keep her fever from getting too high.”
“It should help keep her comfortable,” Ellar added, “until we know if it is effective, which will be a few more hours.”
“I pray to the Maker she has that long,” Ram whispered.
Eryn did, too. She also knew if it hinged on Ram being her mate, his prayer wouldn’t be answered.
She descended into the darkness. This time, hopelessness joined her.
* * *
Eryn’s eyes popped open sometime later. Never knowing how long she drifted between the present and her dream state or where she would end up, the slight disorientation when she arrived didn’t surprise her. She couldn’t make out where she popped up this time, but the warmth along her back didn’t seem anything like a fever. Turning, she found cheery sunshine streaming in through a window.
Hope sprang within her. She wasn’t being chased through a forest or held captive on a ship or racked with pain on a hospital bed.
What if Ellar’s magic serum actually worked?
A rustling noise behind had her turning again, but the spark of hopefulness extinguished in an instant. The huge bed and the masculine furnishings of Ram’s bedroom told her she’d resumed her dream right where it left off—in Ram’s home on Primaria. Except this time, dream-Eryn had returned.
She wanted to throw something or, at the very least, stomp her foot or curse the heavens out of frustration. But she didn’t. Instead, she stood transfixed while her mirror image, lying next to a sleeping Ram, gently stroked his face. These were the same actions repeated from the past, but it wasn’t supposed to be this way.
He should wake beside her, a sleepy sexy smile on his face, and reach for her, ready to finish what they’d started on the couch the day before. Things she should be righted between them, not identical to the past—she’d changed her mind last night. After Lorkin left, she’d discarded the vial of the sleeping drug in the trash bin.
Frantic, she scanned the room.
No. Unless her eyes deceived her, the decanter of vilo sat in the exact spot where she’d put it six months earlier. Since he hadn’t arrived home by midnight, she figured when he did drag in, he’d be too tired to fix himself something to eat. She had set out a light snack and his favorite libation, hoping he’d be tempted. Why would she have done so unless it contained the potion Lorkin had given her? The old Eryn wouldn’t have been so considerate.
She’d been wrong about these dreams. They were nothing but a mixture of memories and illusions conjured by her exhausted and damaged brain. And since they had no meaning and no connection in any way, her efforts to change and correct what
she had done were futile.
She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat, but the pain gripping her heart, crippling disappointment, and guilt overwhelmed her. Her knees wouldn’t hold her any longer. She staggered back and slid down the wall, gaze still glued to the betraying bitch on the bed. That was who Ram would see when he woke moments from now. And if the past repeated, as it seemed destined to, this was only the beginning of more pain for them both.
* * *
Lying beside him, head propped on her hand, she watched him sleep. Never having seen him like this—hair loose and messy, a scruff of dark beard along his jaw, his often-stern face relaxed—she thought he looked perfect this way, too. Usually up first, he had a habit of teasing her awake with gentle kisses and caresses. His favorite part of the day, he’d said, when he could count on her being soft and compliant to his touch. She’d scowled, while he’d chuckled. But she had to admit, if only to herself, even as a captive with a mission on her mind, in the vulnerable state between sleep and waking, she enjoyed being snuggled against him, his big body a source of incredible heat and comfort, while his unforgettable scent surrounded her.
Unable to keep from touching him, she ran her fingers lightly up his chest, the broadness of which dwarfed her hand, a feat by itself since she’d never been considered small boned. As her eyes ate him up, her heart clenched and she rolled forward, burying her face in his neck. She inhaled, consigning his glorious essence to memory. It would have to last a lifetime.
Unsure of how long she lay there, absorbing everything about him she could, one thing remained certain—she needed to get up. The more time she spent with him, the more she yearned for his touch, the more tempted she became to let everything and everyone else fend for themselves and, just once, be selfish.
She needed to go before just once became now.
With her face angled up to his, she laid her hand against his stubbled jaw and pressed her lips to his. “Good-bye, Ram,” she whispered. “I’ll never forget you.”
His Rebellious Mate (Primarian Mates Book 3) Page 24