by Jill Mansell
“It wasn’t that much money,” Sophie told him. “Only three pounds twenty pence.”
“Wow,” breathed Will, when they were out of eavesdropping range of the children. “I mean…wow.”
“She has that effect on men,” Oliver agreed. “I tell you, if I were twenty years younger, I’d be tempted myself.”
“It’s not just her. This whole…place.” As Will Gifford spread his arms to encompass Ashcombe, a button went ping and parted with his shirt. “I mean, are any of the people who live here normal?”
“Funny you should say that.” Oliver steered him up the road toward the mini supermarket. “Brace yourself. You’re about to meet Theresa Birch.”
* * *
You knew your subconscious was up to something when you went into Bath to buy a new pair of sneakers and a bottle of contact lens cleaning solution, and scuttled home three hours later with a lime-green silk and velvet bra and panty set instead.
What a trollop.
Worse still was hearing the front door open and guiltily stuffing the shopping bag containing your new bra and panties under the sofa.
“Hi, darling.” Marcella came bursting into the living room. “Buy something nice?”
Maddy pulled a face. “Couldn’t find any sneakers I liked.”
“Oh, what a shame. So you didn’t get anything at all?”
“No, just looked around the shops.” Not just a trollop, but a wicked lying trollop. Wondering if this was how people felt when they smuggled hard drugs through customs, Maddy hurried through to the kitchen and put the kettle on. She imagined the hidden underwear pulsating and glowing like kryptonite, signaling its presence to Marcella. “Chocolate cookies?”
“No thanks, but I’d love a raw carrot.” Marcella grinned. “What a ridiculous question. Of course I want chocolate cookies—ooh, here come the rabble.” She jumped to one side as the door crashed open again. Jake, Sophie, and Bean came clattering down the hallway and erupted into the kitchen. Sophie, covered in grass stains and dust, was clutching a soccer ball and looking triumphant.
“She’s lethal,” complained Jake. “Almost broke my leg. She’s Vinnie Jones in a skirt.”
“He lost,” Sophie said matter-of-factly. “And I don’t wear skirts. Anyway I’ve never heard of Vinnie Jones. Who’s she?”
“That reminds me,” said Marcella. “Vince and I are having a barbecue tonight, if you fancy coming along.”
“Great,” said Jake.
“I can’t.” Maddy used the excuse she’d had the foresight to prepare earlier. “I’m meeting up with Jen and Susie in Bath.” She looked suitably regretful. “We’re having a girly night out.”
“Oh well, never mind. Give them my love,” said Marcella warmly, which only made Maddy feel worse. “And if you’re home before midnight, come on over. We’ll still be going strong—oh, darling, what have you got there? Is that a present for me?” Bending down, she reached for the glossy black bag Bean was dragging into the kitchen, and Maddy felt herself break into a light sweat. For a panicky moment, she wondered if she could get away with pretending it was a present for Marcella, but it wasn’t her birthday and the bra was the wrong size and her mother wasn’t stupid. So basically she wasn’t going to be able to get away with it at all.
“I say, these are a bit special.” Lifting out the tiny velvet-trimmed bra and panties, Marcella’s dark eyes danced with mischief. “Been out buying for a lady friend, darling?”
“Nothing to do with me.” Jake raised his hands, absolving himself.
“Maddy? I thought you said you didn’t find anything you liked.”
“I…I changed my mind,” Maddy stammered, uncomfortably aware of Jake’s gaze upon her. “I mean, I did like them, so I bought them, but I’m going to take them back to the shop. Too…um, expensive,” she added hurriedly as Marcella glanced at the price tag and let out a low whistle. “It was a moment of madness. I don’t know why I did it. I mean, you know me; it’s usually Marks & Spencer’s multipacks.”
Maddy knew she was gabbling, but this part of the lie was actually true. She could get worryingly excited about tearing open a pristine M&S multipack.
“You don’t know why you did it? Spent sixty pounds on these? Well, I think I can probably hazard a guess. So”—Marcella gave her a less than subtle, tell-us-everything nudge—“who is he?”
Now Maddy really couldn’t meet Jake’s eye. She didn’t know where to look.
“No one. Really. I just saw them and liked the color.”
“See that?” Marcella pointed out of the kitchen window. “Flying pig. Sweetheart, you must have your eye on someone—hey, I know! Why don’t you invite him to the barbecue? Bring Jen and Susie along too. Then it won’t be so obvious. Just tell him it’s a casual get-together for a few friends. Wouldn’t that be a fabulous idea? Then we can all meet him and see what we think!”
What Marcella would think truly didn’t bear thinking about. Shoveling the bra and briefs back into their black bag, Maddy said, “Mum, I promise you, there isn’t anyone. This stuff’s going back to the shop, I’m meeting Jen and Susie in Brown’s at seven, and if it’s OK with everyone, I’d quite like a bath before I go.”
“She thinks I was born yesterday,” Marcella said cheerfully as Maddy squeezed out of the crowded kitchen, “but she’s forgotten two important things.”
Ever inquisitive, Sophie said beadily, “What important things?”
“I’m her mother,” Marcella told Sophie, raising her voice so that Maddy could still hear as she escaped up the stairs. “And I’m always right.”
Chapter 14
The glorious bra and panty set, now destined never to be worn, was back at the cottage. Wearing a bronze lace top and tight black trousers—because she was, after all, supposed to be out clubbing with Susie and Jen—Maddy parked in Armitage Close, an anonymous cul-de-sac around the corner from Kerr’s apartment. Feeling like a fugitive, she checked all around before sliding out of the car, then made her way hurriedly to his address.
He answered the door so quickly that Maddy knew he’d been looking out for her. Now that she was actually here, she could barely make out what he was saying, so loud was the adrenaline-fueled pumping of blood in her ears.
She took a deep breath. This was it; she was here.
“I’m sorry, I’ll calm down in a minute. I just feel so bad about deceiving Mum…Marcella…” Managing a shaky smile, Maddy said, “And then I thought about not coming here tonight and that made me feel worse.”
Kerr led her through the paneled hallway, into a high-ceilinged sitting room. Primrose-yellow walls and a cream carpet didn’t go at all with the heavy, reddish-brown mahogany furniture or the dark blue rugs sprawled across the floor.
“I know.” Kerr intercepted her gaze. “It’s horrible, a complete nightmare. I rented it furnished. The kitchen has to be seen to be believed. Anyway, that’s not important.” He shook his head. “Being appalled by my kitchen tiles isn’t why you’re here. Bloody hell, life would be a damn sight easier if it were.”
Maddy nodded, acknowledging this with feeling.
“I still can’t believe this is happening,” Kerr went on. “It’s only been a week, for heaven’s sake. This time last Saturday I hadn’t even met you.” He paused. “And then at the party, bam. Since that night I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before.”
He was wearing a dark blue cotton shirt and faded jeans, the body beneath them—frankly—to die for. Her stomach knotted with lust, Maddy whispered, “I know. Me too.” There was no point in trying to deny it; the attraction was fairly obviously mutual. She cleared her throat. “But what if we’re feeling like this because we know it can’t happen? Like being on a diet and knowing you can’t have chocolate mousse?”
“OK, I thought about that too. That’s why I invited you here ton
ight.” Moving toward her, Kerr smiled slightly and reached for her hands. “Come here, mousse.”
Pulling her toward him, he kissed her on the corner of her mouth, then on the other corner, then properly, and Maddy thought, At last. It was like going to heaven, feeling Kerr’s warm body pressed against her own and his fingers (thank goodness she hadn’t used hair gel) sliding unimpeded through her hair. All too soon he pulled away, surveying her with an expression in his dark eyes that almost made her want to cry.
“OK, you have to bear with me now because I’m not used to saying this kind of stuff. I’m not sure, but I think I love you.”
“Oh God, don’t say that…” Maddy covered her mouth, not meaning it for a moment. This was what she wanted to hear him say more than anything. But it was just so scary, so impossible. How could anything but misery result from a situation so dire?
“It’s the only way. We both know how we feel. It’s too late to back down and pretend it hasn’t happened. Not seeing you again would only make me want you more.” Kerr waited. “Right, so this is the plan. We are going to see each other. We’ll be incredibly discreet, no one else will know, and with a bit of luck, we’ll discover we don’t like each other as much as we think we do.”
Maddy stared at him in disbelief. “With a bit of luck?”
“I know, I know.” He shrugged helplessly. “But what other choice do we have? And it could happen, you know. In fact, the odds are that it will. How many boyfriends have you had?”
Taken aback by the bluntness of the question, Maddy said cautiously, “Well…quite a few, I suppose. All in all.”
“OK, same here. Maybe a bit more than quite a few.” A flicker of a smile crossed his face. “I’m sorry. If only I’d known, I’d have saved myself. But the point is, we went out with other people because we liked them. And each time, sooner or later, and for whatever reason, we stopped going out with them. Fingers crossed, that’s exactly what’ll happen to us.”
It didn’t help that while he was saying this, he was running his fingers magically down the side of her face, touching her neck, looking very much as though he wanted to kiss her again.
“But you said…” Maddy’s throat constricted with emotion. “You said that you thought you might, um…”
“Love you. I know. But it could still happen, couldn’t it? Give it a couple of weeks, and I might realize I can’t stand the sight of you. Or you may decide you never want to see me again.”
Right now, that seemed about as likely as deciding that your favorite sandwich was cat food and mustard.
“And if we don’t?”
“If we don’t, it’s officially a disaster. We’ll just have to run away together.” Kerr drew her toward him once more, his dark eyes fixed on hers. “We’ll have to find somewhere where Marcella can’t track us down. Join up with some charity or other and devote the rest of our lives to helping homeless, smelly old tramps in Siberia. It’ll be vile, but at least we’ll be together. God”—he pulled a face—“I really hope it doesn’t come to that. Talk about an incentive to get you out of my system.”
“Maybe we should write down a list of our bad points, to get the ball rolling,” Maddy said helpfully. “You know, I could go off you really quickly if you told me lots of completely hideous things about you.”
“You think? Like what?”
“Oh, like if you watch Sky Sports all the time. And get really worked up about soccer. And you hate dogs. And you’re really irritatingly tidy. Or if you only change your socks once a fortnight. And you tell bad jokes all the time and expect me to laugh at them over and over again.” Actually, this was easy. All she had to do was remember all the things that had annoyed her about previous boyfriends. “Or you’re proud of the fact that you’ve never done the dishes in your life, or you play with model trains, or you think it’s funny to mock people with speech impediments, or like to pretend you’ve got a huge spider in your hand when you know perfectly well someone’s terrified of spiders—”
“Stop, stop.” Kerr held up his hands in protest. “Jesus, what kind of men have you been associating with? That’s the most appalling list I’ve ever heard. Do you seriously think I’d do any of those things?”
“Well, no.” Maddy was embarrassed.
“Apart from the spider trick, of course.” He nodded matter-of-factly. “I’ve done that.”
“Really?”
“When I was about sixteen. But if you think it would help, I could do it again.”
“No thanks. How about you?”
“What puts me off girls, you mean? God, loads of things.” Sliding his arms around her, Kerr said, “Girls on diets, girls asking if their dress makes them look fat, girls reading out your horoscope even though they know you aren’t interested, girls who think spending a fortune on clothes and manicures makes up for not having a personality, girls who eat chips with their mouths open, girls who pee in other people’s yards, then expect to be rescued when they can’t climb back over the wall—OK, not true,” he said as Maddy shot him a warning look. “I love it when girls do that.”
“Where can we go?” asked Maddy.
“I told you, anywhere in the world. Actually, Siberia’s bloody freezing. How would you feel about Barbados?”
“I mean here, while we’re secretly seeing each other and doing our best to hate each other. Every time we go out, I’ll be terrified Marcella might see us, or friends of Marcella might see us and tell her.” She gestured in desperation. “Or friends of friends, and God knows there must be thousands of them around. Don’t you see? We can never go anywhere.”
“Fine.” Kerr shrugged, unperturbed. “We’ll just have to stay here and make our own entertainment.”
“But it’ll be like being stuck in a prison cell,” wailed Maddy. “It’ll be boring!”
“I’ve been called a lot of things in my time but never boring. Anyway, why does it have to be? We can play card games. Watch documentaries on the TV. Make model airplanes. Do giant jigsaw puzzles…”
He was teasing her. Maddy squirmed with pleasure as his hands settled around her waist, his thumbs idly stroking her back. She was getting the distinct impression that the jigsaw puzzles he had in mind comprised two pieces.
“This isn’t going to work.” She held her breath as his warm mouth brushed her collarbone.
“OK, you’re right. Let’s forget it.” Abruptly spinning her around, Kerr marched her back to the hall, yanked open the front door, and—
“Noooo!” shrieked Maddy.
He closed the door.
“Think it might work after all?”
She exhaled slowly. Kerr, having successfully called her bluff, regarded her with amusement.
“Maybe.” Trembling again, Maddy leaned back against the wall.
“Sorry. Not good enough.”
“OK. We’ll do it.” What choice did they have, after all? The alternative—not seeing him again—was unthinkable.
“Wise decision.” Smiling, he kissed her again. Feeling as though her whole body was on fire, Maddy wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back. Twaaang went her bra strap, and for a split second she thought Kerr had unfastened it.
“That definitely wasn’t me.” Raising his hands, he protested his innocence. “I didn’t do that.”
Bugger, he was right. With impeccable timing, Maddy realized, her left shoulder strap had chosen this moment to snap.
“Sorry, it’s an old bra.” Wryly, she added, “The excitement must have been too much for it.”
“You see? That’s one of the things I like about you. What color is it?”
“Um…sort of coffee colored.” Mocha, actually, but Kerr was only a man. He wouldn’t understand.
“And what color are your panties?”
Oh, the shame. But since modesty clearly wasn’t an option, Maddy said, “Black.”
Anyway, with a bit of luck, he’d find this out for himself before too long.
“Do you know how much I love it that you’re wearing a brown bra and black panties?” Kerr said happily.
Brown? The horror. Unable to help herself, Maddy blurted out, “Mocha.”
There was a difference.
“Whatever. I just… All my life, whenever I’ve been out with girls and undressed them for the first time, they’ve always been wearing brand-new, super-lacy, matching bra and panties. It’s so contrived, it makes me feel as if I’ve been set up. The situation just doesn’t feel spontaneous anymore.”
“If you feel that strongly about it, you could always try not undressing them,” Maddy pointed out.
“It doesn’t put me off that much. Anyway, I’m just saying it makes a refreshing change, and I really like it that you aren’t the kind of girl who meets a new man and rushes out to buy a sexy new bra and panty set.”
“This isn’t going to work,” said Maddy. “I’m supposed to be putting you off me.”
“Sorry, but you haven’t.” Kerr’s eyes glittered. “In fact, you’ve failed, with flying colors.”
“But I did buy a sexy bra and panty set! This morning! It’s at home. I was going to wear them tonight, but Bean found them under the sofa,” Maddy babbled, “and then Marcella saw them and started teasing me about having a new man, so—”
“Nice try.” Kerr tilted her face up to meet his and slid the broken bra strap down over her shoulder. “In fact, excellent try. But you can’t fool me.”
Chapter 15
“OK, I need you to know something. I’m not normally the type of girl who jumps into bed with someone on the first date,” said Maddy an hour later.
“No?” Grinning down at her, Kerr said, “You did it very well.”
“I just don’t want you to think I’m completely easy, because I’m not.” She ran her hands through her drastically rumpled hair. “But this is different, because putting it off would only have made us want each other more. So by sleeping together as soon as possible, we’ve gotten all that breathless anticipation stuff out of the way, which made it the right thing to do, don’t you agree?”