“We have a bit of an idea, but I haven’t talked to Jenna about it yet,” I say.
Dad opens the door to the waiting room they told him we needed to wait in so we could be updated about the operation as it goes. “Whatever your plan is, I just want you both to know that if Jenna doesn’t stop being selfish then she has no place in our family.”
Rod gets an angry look on his face. “Look, Dad, Reed and I can work this out. This is our problem. It’s not Jenna’s fault. And I don’t want you talking about her like that. She’s anything but selfish. She’s selfless!”
Dad looks kind of shocked. “Well, I talked to her outside and told her to stop being selfish.”
Rod wags his finger at our father. “Then when Reed brings her back in here you had better apologize to her. She’s not selfish. Reed and I are, but not her.”
I nod in agreement and Dad looks kind of sheepish as I say, “I’ll go get her. For now, we won’t talk about anything. Let’s get through Mom’s surgery. Then we can talk to Jenna. Okay, Rod?”
He nods. “Yeah. Right now all that matters is Mom. Tell her there’s nothing to worry about. I’ll be cool, and so will Dad.”
I leave the room and go outside. She’s sitting on a bench with her head hanging low as she looks at her phone.
“Hey, gorgeous,” I say and she looks up at me.
“Oh, it’s you. How’s your mother?” she asks with a lot of sadness in her eyes.
“They just took her in. I’m here to get you to take you into the waiting room. Dad told us what he said to you and he has an apology waiting for you. Rod jumped his ass about telling you that you’re the selfish one. Rod and I both know it’s us, not you.” I reach out to take her hand and she just looks at it.
“No, he’s right. I am selfish. I want it all, I guess. And that’s not fair, and it is selfish. I was waiting for you to come out so I could tell you that I’m going to go to my parents I think. Your family needs this time alone. This time should be about your mom, not anything other than that.” She looks back at her phone, and I kneel down in front of her.
With a gentle tug at her chin to make her look at me, I catch her eyes with mine. “Jenna, come inside, please. I need you, and Rod has promised he’ll be cool. Dad’s sorry. My parents don’t understand things, but Rod and I are coming to terms with things. And we can talk about it later. For now, I need you to come hold my hand. Rod may need you to do that for him too, and I want you to know that if you feel like comforting him, you can. Don’t do it if you don’t want to, though. It’s all up to you.”
She looks a little stunned. “Are you kidding?”
I shake my head. “No. The fact is, you loved him once, and I could tell by how you looked, the things he told you in that closet had you feeling conflicted. He and I have had our ropes on you for too long now. We’ve pulled and pushed you and that’s going to stop.”
“I don’t know what to do, Reed. I love you, and I’d like a friendship with Rod,” she says as she looks confused. “But right now I feel in the way of your family and your obligations to them.”
“I can see you feel that way. So let me tell you that if I go back in there without you, it will make all three of us Manning men feel terrible. And you can decide what you want to do with that information.”
I wait for her to digest what I’ve said, then she takes my hand. “I’ll go. We can deal with the other stuff later.”
I wrap my arm around her shoulders and take her inside. Jenna Foster has had a place in our family in one capacity or another for a very long time. Now is not the time to toss her aside as if she’s no part of it.
And I hope I have the strength to handle it if she decides not to be a part of it after this.
Chapter 31
JENNA
The Manning men’s faces as I come into the little waiting room are an odd combination of grim and happy. Rod gets up and walks up to me as Reed still has his arm around my shoulders.
He reaches out and takes both my hands in his. “Hey, Jenna. I just want you to know I’m going to be cool about shit. And Dad has something he wants to say to you.” He keeps one of my hands in his, but lets the other go.
The feeling as both of them touch me is odd and I feel uneasy. Then Jason stands up and I feel very uneasy as he says, “I’d like to apologize for what I said earlier, Jenna. The boys have explained things to me and I am sorry. This stuff with Sue has me on edge. I hope you can accept my apology.”
“Of course. I understand, Jason.”
Rod pulls me along and sits down. I sit in the chair in between him and Reed. Reed’s arm moves from my shoulders and he takes my other hand. Rod still has the one he’s been holding.
So here I sit in the most awkward position I have ever been in. Both know I’m holding the other’s hand, and no one is mad or jealous or anything. Only worried about their mother.
I sit back and do my best to relax as Reed’s thumb runs nervously back and forth over my knuckles and Rod’s hand makes little squeezes every once in a while.
After a while, the phone in the room rings and Jason picks it up. “Yes. Okay. Thank you.” He hangs up and smiles. “They have the tumor out. She’s doing fine. Now they have to close her head back up; they’ll call when that’s done.”
My heart jumps with the good news. Then Reed stands up and pulls me along with him and Rod follows too, as he still has my hand.
He lets it go as I turn to hug Reed and I wrap my arms around him. “I told you it would be okay,” I say as I hug him.
Reed lets me go and gestures with his head for me to turn around. I do, and find Rod there with tears in his eyes. “I was so worried about her.”
I hold open my arms and he hugs me. “She’s going to make it through this, Rod. She’s a tough lady.”
“Thanks, Jenna.” I freeze as his lips touch my ear for a second, then he lets me go.
I look at Jason and say with a laugh, “How about you? Do you need a hug too, Jason?”
He steps forward. “I really do.” He takes me up in his arms in a hug too and I smile.
I really do have a place in this family!
We all sit back down and Jason laughs, then says, “Do you kids remember when we had that last big New Year’s party and Sue did shots with Rod and the cousins? Man, she got wasted. I had to carry her to bed that night.”
Rod laughs. “She downed those shots like a sailor on leave in Singapore!”
Reed starts chuckling too. “The next morning she looked like something that cat had dragged in.”
I add in my memory of that day, “I had to take her to the bathroom and brush her hair. She seemed to have forgotten to brush it with that monster hangover she had, and she whined with every brushstroke I made.”
Reed laughs harder. “Oh yeah! One side flat and one side frizzed all out. Poor Mom!”
We all laugh with the memory, then Jason’s eyes tear up. “Man, I hope we get a hell of a lot more days with her.”
A few tears leak out and then my hands are quickly taken again by Sue’s sons. And now I see how I can be of help. “Hey, remember when the pool was first put in and she slid down that slide hollering wheee all the way down, like a little kid?”
Jason starts laughing. “And she made the biggest splash and her face went all red when she came out from under the water to see us all laughing at her!”
I nudge Rod’s shoulder with mine. “And you had to go and take a video of her with your phone. Remember how mad she was at you when you posted it on Facebook?”
He laughs and shrugs. “It got like a zillion likes!”
“I never told her because she would’ve killed you, Rod, but I saw that video on YouTube a whole year later and the remarks were hilarious,” Reed says.
Rod jerks my hand. “And when you and Mom tried to light the barbecue pit on your own, Jenna!” He laughs so hard he doubles over and Reed joins in.
Reed says in laugh-choked words, “Mom’s eyebrows were gone, and Jenna’s bangs were sing
ed almost completely off.”
Jason struggles to stop laughing as he says, “Then Rod came outside and saw the two of them and laughed so hard he fell off the porch, so Reed had to go help him up.”
Reed and Rod both crack up even harder as Reed says, “Yeah, I did, because he and I had just smoked a little happy weed and I knew he couldn’t get up on his own.”
My eyes roll to Reed in surprise and his eyebrows rise up high as he says, “Oops, you didn’t know that, did you?”
I shake my head and narrow my eyes at him, then look back at Rod and give him a little look too. “You bad, bad boys. That’s why Sue and I were even attempting to light the damn thing, because we couldn’t find you two.”
Rod gives the little impish shrug he’s so good at getting out of trouble with. “We heard you both calling us as you two were wandering all over the place looking for us. We were in the garage.”
“Uh, uh,” I say with a shake if my head. “We looked there.”
Reed nudges me with his shoulder. “Not behind the blue bedspread that was strategically hung up in there.”
“You guys are a couple of real scamps!” I say, and we all laugh again.
Everything is feeling great. Then the phone rings. Jason looks at it. “That seems kind of soon, doesn’t it?”
“Want me to get it?” I ask.
He nods and I get up and pick up the phone. “Hello.”
“Hi, this is Dr. Lexor. There’s been a complication, and Sue’s heartbeat stopped.”
Mine stops at that moment too and I close my eyes so they don’t reveal anything to the three men staring at me. “Is she okay now?”
“She is. She was gone for five minutes though and we’ll have to test her for any damage. So bringing her around will take a little longer than expected. I’ll call when we’re done, unless further complications occur.”
“Thank you, Dr. Lexor.” I hang up the phone. “She’s okay.”
Collective sighs ring out. “What happened?” Jason asks.
I take his hand and look him in the eyes. “Jason, the important thing is she’s okay now. Okay?”
He nods. “Tell me what happened.”
“Her heart stopped for five minutes. But they got it going again. The process of bringing her around will take a little longer because of the time loss of resuscitating her. And they’ll be checking to see if it did any damage to her.” His hand is crushing mine, but I don’t say a word.
Rod sees it though and gets up. “Hey, Dad, want to take a walk with me, since we have some time?”
“Yeah,” he says as he looks up at Rod. “Yeah, I need to walk. Shit! I almost lost her there for five minutes, didn’t I?”
Rod pries his father’s hand off mine and helps him up. “Nah, Mom was just fucking with us. You’ll have her around for a long time. Don’t worry.”
I shake my hand to get the blood flow back and look at Reed as they walk out. His face is really pale and I go to him. “You want to take a walk too?”
He shakes his head. “We need to stay here to answer the phone.”
“I can wait here. You can join them if you want.”
He takes my hand and pulls me down to sit in the chair next to his. “Jenna, thank you for being here for us all. It really has opened my eyes like I never have before. You’re a real part of this family. You know it?”
“I feel like I am, yeah. I’m glad to be here for you all. I’m glad I can help you all, and I think Sue would be happy I’m here for you guys.”
“She will be happy to hear you were here for us all. And I want you to know that we all appreciate the hell out of you, girl,” he says. Then his lips touch mine for only a second.
The rush he always sends through me with his kiss goes all through me. And I can feel something extra. His eyes are hiding a secret. “Reed, would you like to tell me anything? Like maybe what you and Rod talked about?”
“He’d like another shot with you.” His eyes go dark. “And I feel like you should have the opportunity to make a choice. I kind of took you along with me very quickly when I got my greedy mitts on you. So we talked about letting you free for a little while. Letting you think about things and leaving you to pick one of us or move on from us both and find another. We wanted to give you a shot at finding a man that’s not a Manning, if you want that.”
His words should surprise me, but as I was holding both their hands I got the sense they had come to some kind of an agreement about me. And it seems I’m going to be set free of everything and everyone.
“You both want me, huh?” I ask.
He nods. “The deadline Rod and I agreed on is our wedding day. But that’s a little too late if you decide not to be with me. So how about three days before that date? I’ll give you a nice sum of money and get you set up anywhere you want to. Neither Rod nor I will contact you, but you’re free to contact us on your own or whoever you want. You’re really going to be free. No hard feelings on anything you decide. We both swear to take whatever it is you decide.”
“If I pick one or the other of you, the other will be hurt,” I say as I take his hand and run my fingers over the top of it.
“Yep,” is his very simple answer. “But we can deal with it. Your happiness is what’s important to us both.”
I can’t help but feel weird. “So I have this pass, in a way. I have your offer of marriage still on the table. Rod still wants me back. But what if I want to date a man, not a Manning man, to see what it’s like not to date a Manning? What if I have sex with this non-Manning man? You still want me to marry you if I decide he’s not the one for me and you are?”
Reed nods. “It’s more than complicated, and I know that. If you want to talk to Rod and try things out with him, then you can do that too. And if it’s not what you want and you find you still love me, then I will take you back.”
I smile, as these men are fooling themselves. “That isn’t how things will work. I know that. Both of you are possessive creatures. If I’m with either of you, the other will write me off. But with a few dates with another man I might be able to see if anyone can hold my attention the way both of you have.”
I watch Reed’s face go very solemn. “I don’t want to do this, Jenna. If it will hurt you, I won’t allow it. I just don’t want to go into a marriage with you and build a family and one day you tell me you love Rod and our marriage is over. Take the time to think about what it is you want.”
What do I want?
I want Reed. I know I want Reed. But I want a life with Reed that doesn’t mean he and I both lose his family. So I say, “K. I’ll stay with you guys through this, but go back to my parents for the nights. Then I think I can get a student teacher job in Tempe until the middle of May. And then I can make the decision. My final one.”
His mouth forms a half-smile. “I hope you pick me.”
I run my hand over his smooth cheek. “I love you, Reed.”
“I love you, Jenna Foster.” He takes my hand in his and holds it to his cheek. “And now, you are a free woman. Fly away and only come back to me when you know it’s me who you want.”
My heart feels so odd as I look into his love-filled eyes.
What the hell will I do as a free woman? And who will I end up with?
Chapter 32
REED
Two weeks since Mom’s surgery and I’m back in Bel-Air, alone.
Jenna went to Tempe and has already started a student teaching job. I set her up in a small apartment and gave her a new car. But I told her not to think she has to pick me in order to keep them. The car is hers, and so is the bank card I gave her to pay her bills.
I don’t want her to come back to me based on my money. But I do want her to come back to me.
I’ve slept very little without her in my bed. The nights pass by like molasses in the winter. And I miss her with every fiber of my being.
But on the bright side, my mother is doing very well in the rehab facility we have her in. Rod has found a job as a mechanic a
t a garage in Prescott and already has a small house rented.
Just before I left, we all had a nice day with Mom at the rehab center, and she looked like she was happy having me and my brother back on good terms.
I have to admit, Rod seems to be getting on the right path. I didn’t see any signs of him drinking or doing any drugs. And he maintained very good behavior where Jenna was concerned.
The two had their talk about what he wanted, and she told me all about it and how she does have love for him in her heart. She’s taking this all very seriously and taking the time to be by herself and think things through.
If she picks either one of us, then that’s a forever commitment, a thing the three of us are well aware of.
With a bottle of wine in my hand, I walk up the staircase to the room I used to share with her and pray we will share again. But I’m not fooling myself into thinking she will come back to me for sure.
As a matter of fact, I see Jenna moving on away from both Rod and me. I could see things in her eyes as she looked at us all, Mom and Dad included. A happiness was there, but so was an underlying emotion of guilt.
I don’t know if she can get past the guilt of loving us both. Of being a rip in the middle of our family. She’s a good person, and I don’t know if she’ll be able to hurt either of us by picking one of us.
She hasn’t contacted me or my brother at all since we both kissed her goodbye the same day of Mom’s surgery. Late that night, after Mom was stabilized and we were all able to visit her, Jenna got in a cab and left us behind her.
Jenna saw how happy Mom was and wanted it to end on that happy note. She felt her presence was a distraction. She also felt that Rod and I needed to bond over the situation with our mother. If she was around, she’d get in the way of that.
So we let her go that very night. We’ve had no contact with her since, other than making sure she had what she needs, which I do through her parents.
But my heart hurts, and my body aches to hold her.
The time can’t pass by quick enough for me!
JENNA
Grading papers in the dim light of the small dining table in the apartment Reed rented me in Tempe, I sip on a glass of red wine to relax at the end of a long day. The kindergarteners were in full swing today and wore me out.
Rockstar Untamed: A Single Dad Virgin Romance Page 50