All I can do is put the ball in her court, I can’t make her hit it!
GIA
My body being shaken, has me waking from my drunken slumber. I have no idea how much vodka I drank but I drank it until I passed out. “Gia! What have you done?” Damien shouts at me as I find it’s him who is shaking me.
“Damien,” I mumble as I’m still drunk. “I’m sorry.” I start crying again.
He wraps me in his strong arms and holds me tight. “I didn’t know you’d take this all so hard. I really didn’t. I had hoped you could cope with it all. I hoped you and I were close enough for you to handle my real life. Was I wrong, Gia? Are not strong enough to handle this?”
“Strong?” I ask then hiccup.
Pulling back, he looks at me and nods. “I know you’re a strong person. That’s what first attracted me to you. I thought you’d understand what it is I have to do to make sure my son has me in his life.”
“You aren’t mad at me?” I ask him as I was sure he’d show up and tell me to get the hell out.
“I’m not happy with you, right now. I mean, you’ve obviously been seeing Ryker behind my back. But you can stop doing that, can’t you? He’s just a playboy. He’s not ever going to be the kind of man you need. The kind of man who offers you a lifetime of security for you and your family.”
“What did he tell you?” I ask as my stomach feels terrible and I hold back a wretch as my tears stop falling.
“He told me that you told him you loved him.” His eyes pierce mine. “Now, I know you don’t really love him. You might like the attention he’s been pouring on you. The flirting, the flattering. I know, you and I, don’t do that. We’re beyond that point in our relationship.”
“A relationship that’s going nowhere,” I say then burp. “I think I need to get up and throw up.”
He helps me off the bed and holds me tight to his side, taking me to the bathroom. Grabbing a rubber band off the vanity counter top, he pulls my hair back into a high ponytail. “Now you won’t get anything in your hair. Should I leave you?”
I nod and he goes out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Getting on my knees in front of the toilet, I let it all come up. I don’t know what I was thinking with drowning myself in alcohol. It didn’t solve a thing and now it seems Damien isn’t tossing me away like the rubbish I feel like I am.
When I get it all out, I wash my face, brush my teeth and go back to find him watching television. He smiles as I come out and pats the place on the sofa next to him.
Taking the seat, he’s offered, he puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer, giving my cheek a kiss. “Do you feel any better?”
“Not really. How can you be okay with what I did, Damien?”
“For the same reason, you will become okay with what I did.”
“Do,” I correct him. “You’re still doing it.”
“For my son, Gia. Only for him,” he reminds me of how noble he is.
Leaning my head on his shoulder, I think about what I should do. I was set to run away from them both. Instead, I drank myself into oblivion and stayed right where I’ve been the last three years. Dependent on Damien and still on board with being his companion until he leaves Earth.
Only now, I know he has other obligations he’s been worried about and I also have the knowledge I am not the only woman he’s sharing a bed with. Somehow, I think this should hurt worse than it does.
I’m hurt by it but I don’t feel the stab of jealousy I did when I found out Ryker went out with another woman. I saw red and went out of my mind over that.
“That man knows how to work women up into a sexual frenzy. He’s a master at it. He did that to you. I don’t blame you. I blame him. But if you continue to allow him to talk to you in such a way then I will blame you,” he tells me as he strokes my arm with his fingertip. “He will never do the things I do for you. He may say he loves you but I show you that I do.”
“And for that, I haven’t even returned those words to you.” I think about that for a moment then pull my head off his shoulder to look at him. “Does it hurt you that I care for you but I don’t love you?”
“It should hurt worse than it does. When Ryker told me that you told him those words, I was a bit taken aback. But then I thought about it and I believe you merely said those words in a fit of retaliation. My news hurt you worse than you want to admit. You haven’t known that man long enough to know if you love him or not. And I can tell you now, he’s shallow and not a person you can count on. He’s all talk and his only actions would be sexual. You’re better than that and smarter.”
“I am, aren’t I?” I ask him as I search his eyes for the truth. “That news did mess me up. And I did a stupid thing and now that I think about it, it was because I wanted to let you feel what it feels like. But I don’t need to do that to myself. I need to make this situation work.”
“Do you trust me to do what I’ve told you I will for you and your family, Gia?” he asks me as he squeezes my shoulders.
“I do.”
“Do you feel like you are selling yourself to me, the way Ryker says he thinks you are?”
“Do you?” I ask as I bite my lip.
He shakes his head. “I do not feel that way.”
“I never did, until he threw that at me. He thinks I’m a whore, a paid whore, Damien. He told me that to my face.”
“He’s wrong. You and I know we are much more to one another than something that simple. And now I think you and I need to make this thing even deeper. I want you to meet Svetlana and Friedrich. I want us to be more like a little family. I would have much more time with my son if we could figure out a way for her to be incorporated into our lives.”
My stomach lurches again and I jump up and run to throw up in the bathroom again. Damien just keeps pushing me one step further. I swear the man isn’t going to stop until he has us both in his bed with him every night!
After another bout of nausea, I clean my face again, brush my teeth again and go back into the room to find him watching television, like nothing is wrong.
“Vodka doesn’t agree with you, Gia. I suppose you forgot about that.” His eyes cut to the side to look at me. “It’s so unattractive.”
“I’m sorry,” I find myself apologizing. “Damien, I need to be honest with you. This thing with the other woman is a thing that’s hard for me to take.”
“I need your help and you’re telling me you won’t give it to me?” he asks me as he turns off the television. “After all I’ve done for you? I take care of your mother and father. Not to mention your sisters, their husbands, and children? And all I am asking is for you to make nice with Svetlana. Pretend you want her to be our personal maid. That way, she and Friedrich can live in our part of the estate. I can see my son every day. But you don’t want to do that for me or for a young boy who needs his father?”
My stomach twists with what he’s asking of me. Then I make him an offer. “If I do that, then I will take a bedroom away from yours. You and she can share a room and be what it is you will be when you leave anyway. I’ll be what you need me to be in front of your family but nowhere else. I don’t want sex to be involved. It’s making me feel bad about myself.”
“You don’t care that I want you in that way?” he asks me then gets up and takes me in his arms, swaying a bit with me then placing his lips on my forehead. “I don’t want to lose what we have, at all. I merely want to add to it.”
“Are you telling me that one day you will be wanting to add her to our bedroom?
“No, I’m not saying anything like that. I will still keep you two separate in that way. I’m not trying to make you do sexual things you don’t want to. I don’t want you both at the same time, anyway.”
I shudder as I think about what he’s asking of me. “I am to let you have your cake and eat it too?”
“And in return, I will leave you billions of dollars to ensure you and your family have more than a lifetime of monetary gains. I
just want more time with my son. Like I told you before, I don’t think it’s fair to leave any woman sexually frustrated. Especially if you’re asking her not to look for that attention elsewhere.”
I nod, even though I don’t understand entirely. I get that he’s from a place where families rule over everyone in them. I get that he needs help and that he’s willing to pay for that help. I get it all but I don’t know if I can do this to myself.
What I was putting up with, being in a loveless relationship for my family and myself was hard enough. Putting up with a man who is sleeping with another woman may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Or my sanity!
RYKER
After checking with a few places, I’ve found that if Gia looks into it hard enough, she can find places that will let her live for free until she gets on her feet, especially if she has a job and Gia will have a great one that will pay her after two weeks of working for my company.
She can get on the state’s food program and will be able to eat. The places that will give her shelter will also give her a free bus pass. Her life won’t be that easy for the next couple of weeks if she takes the job offer but then it will be fine and she will see that she can do this on her own.
I think it will bring her to a place that’s much more mentally healthy for her. Her parents have the family farm they can get back to with a little ingenuity. There are grants her parents can get from the government that I can help them find and fill out.
I’m sure her sisters and brothers-in-law can figure out how to get jobs. Surely, those men worked somewhere before Damien took over their lives, spoiling them. The whole family will be better off than they were.
Well, not financially, but they will be better off than they are now, mentally speaking. That’s if she decides to turn over a new leaf. I might be disappointed in her. I most likely will. I know that. I know that chances of her walking away from all that money are slim. There’s just something about her that makes me want to help her find the woman I know she’s lost.
I’m sure that woman is remarkable. Smart, funny, secure!
I don’t care if she never wants to get together with me. I just want to see her become the woman she can be. The woman she should be!
After having my secretary draft an invitation to interview for a food engineering position, I had a messenger take it to Gia at the hotel. I made sure she could see, she has a deadline. By Friday I will need her answer. She has five days, including the rest of today, to make a great decision that will change her and her family’s lives.
Now to see if she does it…
GIA
A knock at the hotel room door has me wondering who it could be as Damien goes to answer it. A frown is on his face for some reason. It makes me think he has an idea of who it is.
As he opens the door, I see a young man at it with a large manila envelope. “This is for Miss Flynn.” He hands the thing to Damien and leaves, leaving me wondering even more.
“For me?” I ask as he brings me the package.
“Ryker sent it. To lure you away from me,” he says then tosses it on the sofa next to me. “Here, look at it, don’t look at it, I don’t care. I’m sure he thinks he can offer you more than I can but can he be trusted?”
Looking at the envelope but not touching it, I think about how Damien will really feel if I open it to see what Ryker is offering me. “I’m sure you’re right, Damien. Just throw it away. The man has caused enough trouble as it is. I need to learn how to ignore him. He has my head a mess, after all.”
“That he does,” Damien says and comes to pick up the thing and takes it then throws it in the trashcan near the door. “I’d like to invite Svetlana and Friedrich over to the room, so you can get to know one another.”
Swallowing hard, I find myself feeling ill again but say, “Okay.” Why do I do shit like that?
I don’t want to deal with this right now. Maybe not ever!
But the word just slipped out of my mouth, even though I don’t mean it at all. I can’t think of how I’ll take being around her. I know she has a place in Damien’s life but damn!
“They’re just a few doors down. I’ll go get them,” he says then leaves.
I jump up and go to the bathroom. I look kind of crappy with being hungover already and feeling so unsettled. And what about the thing Ryker offered me? Why was I so quick to chunk it? Why did I leave that up to Damien? What’s wrong with me?
I run back out and take the thing out of the trash and hide it in a drawer. Maybe I will look at what it is later. When Damien’s not around to watch me.
The door opens just as I close the drawer and I turn to find Damien coming in, carrying a little boy who looks so much like him there’s not a doubt in my mind the kid is indeed his. A short woman, plain, and looking more than a bit sheepish is following them.
Damien beams at me. “This is Friedrich.”
The boy is shy and hides his face in Damien’s shoulder. “He’s adorable,” I say as it’s true. Then I look at the woman who won’t look up at me. “Svetlana, it’s nice to meet you.”
She looks up at me, revealing dark eyes with shadows beneath them. Life must not be as easy for her as it has been for me and that makes me feel sorry for her. Hidden away, like she’s been, must be hard.
“It is nice to meet you also, Gia. Damien has told me all about you and how you are helping him to keep us in his life. I too appreciate you and what you are doing. I am sorry for the conditions.”
At least she understands there are hardships on my part. It’s not all roses and cherries. “Thank you for understanding. This is an odd situation. And I think we can all agree this child and his needs outweigh all of ours.”
Damien’s smile doesn’t fade as he says, “See, Svetlana, I told you, she’s one in a million.”
I don’t feel like one in a million, I feel like a pushover. Walking away, I take a seat on the sofa and they follow. Damien coaxes the two-year-old to shake my hand and he finally does. “Hello, Friedrich. My, how handsome you are.”
He nods and lays his head back on his father’s shoulder and I find it sweet. And I also find myself feeling like a third wheel. If the place was bigger and there were more rooms, I’d excuse myself and go hide away from the little family that is Damien and these people.
“What you are doing is beyond selfless,” the woman tells me. “I can’t say I’d do the same if I was in your shoes.”
“Nonsense,” Damien says then gives her a stern look. “And what have I told you about talking that way?”
So, he rules over her too. Interesting.
“We should all go out to dinner,” I say as I get up to find some clothes to change into. “I’m starving and we might as well start being seen in public together. Once we go back to Russia at the end of the week, this charade will begin. I think it’s best that way. We can say I found her here. We can say she was working for Ryker’s staff and I asked her to come work for us.”
“You’re getting ahead of yourself, Gia,” Damien says. “She has family in Russia. I will come up with a plausible story.”
“He already has,” she says as she looks at him with a frown. “You have not told her everything?”
“Not everything.” He looks at me with a grin. “You see, I’ve already called home. A place has been readied for them. I told them you hired her and had her brought to us, in America, to interview her. She filled out an application at a temp agency and I answered it, under your name, back in Russia.”
“My name?” I ask as I feel a bit violated.
“Yes, I wanted nothing to come back to me. So, the story is that you hired her and we will bring them back with us on the company jet.”
“What does he call you?” I ask Damien as I gesture to his son.
“Mr. Markov.”
I find that appalling. “Yet, he knows who you are to him, right?”
“No,” Damien says then looks at the child’s mother. “I am merely his mother’s friend who comes aroun
d a lot and pays special attention to him.”
“But when you leave to go to Mars, you will tell him the truth, right?” I ask.
The boy’s mother nods. “That is when he will be told. So, you see, that’s not to be talked about. You do understand.”
I nod and say, “Well, with the story told to me then we can still go get something to eat.”
“And you need a new cell, don’t you?” Damien asks as he sets the boy down and hands him something out of his pocket, a little toy to play with.
“I could use one,” I say then go into the bathroom to freshen myself up.
I can hear them mumbling and can’t quite make it all out. I know she’s about as happy with this, as I am. She’s not keen on another woman being around her son. I can hear her telling him that I am not to get close to their son.
Damien is agreeing with her and I feel left out. Why bring me into this and make it where I have to virtually ignore a child? Why do this to me at all? Why am I allowing it?
I grit my teeth and look at myself in the mirror. “What’s wrong with you? Do you think you deserve this?”
A light knock on the bathroom door has me looking at it and I open it to find Damien standing there. “She’d rather not join us. She wants to keep things very separate. I think she’s afraid our son will get close to you. The same way I want no other man in his life, she wants no other woman.”
With a sigh, I walk out of the bathroom, finding them gone, and say, “How is this supposed to be, Damien? Am I to ignore the kid and her or what?”
“Treat her the way you’d treat any of our maids and their children.” He takes my hand and leads me out of our room. “It’ll all work out. You’ll see.”
I’m not happy with this situation at all. But I can’t seem to tell him that. I can’t seem to find my voice. I can’t begin to understand when I lost myself. I guess around the time he gave my family all the money he did…
RYKER
It’s Wednesday and not a word has been heard from Gia. My lawyer has told me to sign the contract for Markov Global and I’ve done that and am waiting for Damien to show up to pick it up.
Rockstar Untamed: A Single Dad Virgin Romance Page 110