by S. C. Ransom
“Whoever was impersonating me was very persuasive. And stop laughing, Josh, it’s not funny.” Josh tried to smother his amusement but he wasn’t very successful.
I was about to ask him if he had any thoughts about who might’ve been so cruel when we were interrupted by the sound of the old school bell clanging at the bottom of the stairs. Josh sighed and shut down his laptop. He was being summoned.
“Looks like my lie-in is over.”
“Have fun!” I smiled at him as I picked my way back across his bedroom floor, through the piles of discarded clothes. I quickly went to my bedroom, shutting the door carefully so that no one would hear me, and checked my watch. It was nearly half-past nine, so hopefully not too early for Callum. I sat at my desk with the mirror positioned in front of me and called to him softly.
He was there in an instant, the tingle in my arm starting almost before I had finished saying his name. He was sitting just behind me with his left arm superimposed across my right wrist as usual. His other hand was already busy stroking my hair.
“Hi. Looks like you’ve been having a busy morning.”
“Hello. I wondered if you’d been watching. So you know what’s been going on?”
“I think so. Some poor kid thought he was in with a chance.” Callum gave me one of his most gorgeous smiles.
“You don’t know the half of it.” I quickly gave him the full details of the hideous event, finding myself blushing furiously yet again at the horror of it. Callum’s brow furrowed in confusion.
“Who can possibly have a grudge against you? I mean, none of your friends would do that, would they?
“No, absolutely not! And anyway, some of them might be able to make a lucky guess at my password, but none of them would hack into my e-mail as well as my Facebook account. Someone who knew every school secret I have ever had broke into my account and e-mailed the headmistress on Thursday. Luckily for me they got the address wrong so it never got delivered. I’ve obviously upset somebody who knows me really, really well, but I can’t even think who would know that stuff.”
In the mirror I could see Callum’s strong arm enfolding me, holding me close and safe. “That’s so weird. It’s almost as if someone was in your head, but how could that be?”
“I know. I keep trying to figure out who can have all that information and why they would be doing this to me. What have I done to them?”
“I’m sure you haven’t done anything. It’s someone else with the problem, not you.”
I knew he was trying to make me feel better, but I wasn’t sure I believed him. “It can’t be a coincidence though, not all of it.”
“Well, maybe it’s someone from school. What about Ashley?”
“That’s another thing! She gave me a slap the other morning – I didn’t even tell you about it. It can’t be her doing the rest of it, though. Slapping is about as sophisticated as she gets.”
“So that’s at least two different people with grudges. Why did she slap you?”
“Oh, it was just nonsense. She thinks I still like Rob. As if!” Callum’s lips pressed together in a thin line as he considered that fact. “Come on, don’t you get all grumpy on me too! You know that he’s no competition for you.” To prove my point I reached up and in the mirror saw my fingers gently stroking his face from the cheekbone to his jaw. He leaned towards my hand, shutting his eyes briefly, and the lightest of tickles traced across my palm. My heart melted again as I looked at him. Whatever the pain and the problems, I loved him and wanted to be with him. “Hey, enough bad news; I need to be getting a shift on. Mum has offered to take me to the station as she thinks I’m going to Tate Modern. Meet me at the dome?”
A gentle smile appeared slowly on his face but his eyes stayed sad. “My favourite place. I’m not sure that the Golden Gallery will be shut though. I didn’t have time to check this morning.”
“Come on! Don’t look so gloomy! After all this nonsense I could do with cheering up, and the best way to do that is to have a proper cuddle from you.”
“Even with everyone watching?”
“I won’t notice them for a second, not when I have you.” In the mirror I could see his free arm tighten around me, then he dropped a kiss on the top of my head.
“See you there then. Give me a call when you get to the Tube station.”
I looked quickly at my watch. “Two hours, that’s all. See you soon.” He gave me another quick squeeze and was gone.
I spent the time on the train trying hard not to think about all the bad things that were going on, but it was difficult not to keep coming back to it. I had somehow accumulated a lot of enemies in a very short space of time. As I turned them over in my mind yet again I started to fidget with the amulet on my wrist. It was such a beautiful piece of jewellery, with the mysterious stone that was exactly the same colour as Callum’s eyes, held in the cage of finely twisted silver ropes. I still couldn’t believe my luck in finding it, whatever the other problems. I sat and traced its outline with my finger as I thought about the matching one on Callum’s arm. Soon we would be together, his strong, smooth fingers laced together with mine as we watched the London skyline. Whatever was causing my other problems, I could deal with them all if I had Callum.
The suburbs of London streamed past my window, slowly turning into the industrial parks and markets, and finally the snake-like structure of the old Waterloo International came into view. At the station I found that the Tube link directly to Bank was shut, and the woman at the information desk directed me to a bus. Sitting on the top deck as we drove over Waterloo Bridge I could see St Paul’s in the distance, the late morning sun glinting off the Golden Gallery, which encircled the very top of the dome. That was my special place, where the amulet and my new talents allowed Callum to appear to be real, where I could touch him and hold him. And kiss him. The thought made me smile again. Whatever else was going on at least there was the chance that I might get to kiss him again.
But it was a Saturday, so I wasn’t sure how practical it was going to be. Even from the bridge I could just glimpse people up there, enjoying the view from one of the best vantage points in London. Previously Callum had been able to ensure that there was maintenance going on, which kept the tourists away. I had no idea how he managed it, but it meant that our visits had been reasonably private, apart from all the other Dirges. Kissing an invisible man in a crowd of people would be interesting.
The bus slowly worked its way down Fleet Street, but came to a standstill at the bottom of Ludgate Hill. I could see the queue of traffic snaking up towards the cathedral. I checked that my headphones were secure and was about to pretend to make a call to speak to Callum when the phone rang, making me jump. It was Rob. I debated ignoring it, but curiosity got the better of me.
“What do you want?” I said, abruptly.
“And good morning to you, you gorgeous creature! What are you doing today?”
“I’m going out, actually. Not that it’s any of your business.”
“Well, how about I join you? Keep you company while that boyfriend of yours is away?”
“Are you mad? Why would I want to spend the day with you?”
“Now, don’t be like that, Alex. We had one little misunderstanding, that’s all. Can’t a guy get a second chance? Let me show you what it’s like to have a boyfriend who isn’t away all the time.” His voice was smooth and oozed confidence, which irritated me even more.
“I’m not going to listen to this, Rob. Don’t call me again!” As I angrily snapped my phone shut I became horribly aware of how loud I had become. The people around me on the bus were all obviously listening. Ignoring them I stabbed quickly at the keys on the phone.
“Callum, hi. I’m stuck on a bus.” I tried to keep my voice low and unemotional. “The Tube was shut. Do you want to meet me on the steps? I’ll call you back in a minute to check and see if you got the message.”
I waited for a few seconds, knowing that it would take him almost no time to run from
the Tube station to where I was on the bus. Very quickly I felt the tingle in my arm, and automatically started to relax. I picked up the phone again.
“Hi. I seem to be stuck. I’m going to see if the driver will let me off.”
“OK. There’s a massive queue all round St Paul’s so if you can get off, you should.”
No one took any notice of me at all as I made my way down the stairs and joined the group of people pleading with the bus driver to open the doors. He kept protesting that we weren’t at a stop, but eventually gave in and we all piled out.
As I approached the building I looked at the two long queues of people waiting to get inside the cathedral. “This could take a while,” I murmured as I headed towards the back of one of the lines, digging my season ticket out of my bag. “Which of these will go faster, can you see?”
“Oh, you don’t have to wait there, not if you have your ticket. Nip down to the café and go into the entrance in the crypt.”
“Really? OK, let me know if I’m heading in the wrong direction.”
The café was noisy and packed, and a strong smell of toast wafted across the long, low space. It seemed odd that such a busy café should be nestled right underneath the main part of the cathedral, and not at all in keeping with the hushed silence just above. I worked my way round the tables and chairs towards the far end of the vast room where there was a fancy iron grille. At the far side was a bored-looking attendant. I quickly flashed my ticket at him and was soon through to the rest of the crypt.
Callum and I walked towards Nelson’s monument on our way to the stairs. As we passed I stole a quick glance at him. Ever since he’d restored my memories, I could always see him inside the building – properly see him, not just a reflection in a mirror – and he got more solid the higher up we went. I wondered what he would be like down here. The glimpse I got stopped me in my tracks.
“Callum!” I called after him, remembering just in time to talk into my phone mouthpiece. We were right by the big black casket that sat under the middle of the dome, as close as we could possibly get to being directly underneath the centre of it.
“Hey, what’s up?” He wheeled around and stepped back towards me, smiling. His beautiful face was worn and tired, looking as if a million cares and worries were heaped on him.
“Are … are you OK?” I asked hesitantly. He had looked just fine in the mirror earlier. I couldn’t imagine what it was that had affected him so drastically.
“I’m fine.” He smiled at me but the lines etched in his face didn’t match his words. He saw my frown and instantly looked even worse. “What’s the matter? Has something else happened?” He stood in front of me, his amulet within mine, the shimmer of his translucent figure strangely clear in the dim lighting of the crypt.
“It’s not me. You look … so tired. I’ve never seen you look anything other than perfect before. Has something terrible happened since this morning?”
He blushed briefly at the compliment, but the worry was still evident on his face. “No, nothing. In fact I’m really excited about getting up to the top of the dome with you.”
“I don’t understand then. Why do you look so awful?”
His puzzled frown was suddenly replaced by one of comprehension. “Of course, you can see it too!”
“See what?”
“We don’t tend to come down here too much because this far down under the dome it shows our general state of mind. I guess I look pretty miserable to you?”
I nodded mutely as a couple of tourists stopped to peer at the tomb, then moved on.
“I … I thought you were excited. You just said you were, but you look, well, devastated.”
“Huh, believe me, this isn’t close to devastated. As you know I’m about the happiest Dirge there is, and I still look suicidal down here. It’s why we hide in our hoods. Catherine only came the once. I never want to see anything like that again.” He shuddered at the memory.
“So this is how miserable you ought to look? Is that right?”
“That’s what I reckon. Some people, especially those that have been here for a long time, they don’t look much different at all when they come down here, but I guess that’s because they’ve long since given up on trying to keep a balanced view. I’m a bit luckier than that.”
I looked at him with open curiosity. He was solid enough for me to see the lines in his face, the shadows under the eyes, the gaunt cheeks. “Honestly, Callum, you look middle-aged down here. Let’s get up to the top where you are your usual gorgeous self.”
“Suits me,” he smiled, momentarily lighting up his gloomy face. “Next time we take this short-cut I’ll keep my hood up so I don’t frighten you.”
I smiled back, but a small shiver ran down my spine. The amulet and St Paul’s were doing their best to make my life truly weird as usual.
As we walked across the big mosaic star in the main part of the cathedral I stole another glance at him, and was relieved to see that at ground level he was looking more his usual self. Before we got to the bottom of the main staircase he stopped me.
“Can I ask a favour?”
“Of course.”
“Do you mind making a short stop at the Whispering Gallery? There’s someone there who would really like to talk to you.”
I hesitated a fraction too long. I didn’t really want to talk to Matthew again. It was a strangely intimate thing to do, letting someone else into your head with the amulet. It didn’t feel right with anyone but Callum, but I realised I probably shouldn’t let him know that. “Sure, whatever. Do you know what he wants to talk about?”
“It’s not Matthew, it’s Olivia.”
“Oh. What does she want to talk to me for?”
“She feels really bad about what happened with Catherine, and she’s worried that you think some of it was her fault.”
I felt a brief twinge of guilt. I had taken an automatic dislike to Olivia, never having even seen her, just because Catherine had told me that Callum preferred her to me. I knew that it was mean and petty, and I absolutely believed it when Callum told me that it was all nonsense, but I still didn’t really want to chat with her. But if Callum wanted me to talk with her, then I would.
“That’s fine. Will you take me to her?”
“Great. I’ll go and let her know while you make your way up. Go round to your left when you get up there and I’ll tell you when to stop.”
“OK. See you there.” I felt the waft of air as he stooped to kiss my cheek, then waved my ticket at the woman sitting behind the desk. Joining the long queue of people edging up the long spiral staircase I tried not to think about my natural dislike for Olivia. I visualised her as tall, dark and hauntingly beautiful, someone who was able to be comforted by Callum in his own dimension. My fists clenched automatically and I forced myself to relax. She couldn’t be that bad, I reasoned, not if she wanted to talk to me. And Callum seemed to really like her. I tried unsuccessfully to put her out of my mind as I trailed up the endless stairs. When I reached the top I stopped for a moment to catch my breath before I worked my way through the little maze of tiny corridors that led to the gallery itself. I couldn’t resist the temptation to have a quick peek in the mirror. If I was going to meet my rival, I wanted to make sure I didn’t have something stuck in my teeth. But the image that peered back at me was red-faced and breathless. Sighing in resignation, I made for the corridor.
I was walking up the last few narrow steps when I saw the translucent figure coming towards me. I smiled at Callum and felt the familiar tingle in my wrist as he put his amulet in the same space as mine. “Hi,” he said. “Are you OK? I saw you hesitating at the top of the main stairs.”
“Just a bit nervous, that’s all,” I admitted.
“You – nervous? That doesn’t seem likely!”
“Much you know about women then,” I muttered under my breath, forgetting for a moment that he could hear every word.
“You’re serious? You really are nervous of meeting Olivia?�
� He hooted with laughter. “That’s brilliant. She’s been beside herself with worry all morning, ever since I said you were coming. Both of you are scared of the other!”
“I’m not scared,” I huffed. “Just, well, nervous, like I said.” I didn’t want to use the word jealous, even though I knew that’s what it was.
“Come on then, better get the introductions done. She’s waiting in the gallery.” I could hear the smile in his voice; for some reason he was really amused by my discomfort. I pulled open the door and as always was taken aback by the sheer volume of space in front of me. The Whispering Gallery gave a spectacular view of the floor of the cathedral as well as revealing the full scale of the dome itself. As usual there were a large number of tourists sitting on the long seat that hugged the wall of the gallery, whispering with their mouths up against the wall in the hope that someone further along was going to hear them. Most didn’t seem to realise that just sitting normally and talking quietly would have the same effect, and no one but me knew just exactly who was responsible for the strange acoustic phenomenon. The Dirges were sitting and standing around the gallery, unseen by everyone else, and it was their presence that somehow reflected the sound.
I took a deep breath. “To the left, did you say?”
Callum smiled at me, and I was momentarily distracted by seeing him next to me. “Yes, left. She’s right along here. I promise it’ll be OK.”
“If you say so,” I muttered, fiddling unnecessarily with my phone mouthpiece.
“Ah, there you are. Come and meet Alex.”
His tone was annoyingly affectionate so I watched the approaching figure closely. She was more transparent than Callum, and I couldn’t see her as clearly as I could him, but I could tell that she was completely swathed in her cloak, with her hood hanging low over her face. I sat down on a part of the seat unoccupied by human or Dirge, and got out my mirror. Olivia came into full focus in the little piece of glass. As I watched, small, delicate hands appeared from the heavy folds of cloth and moved hesitantly to the hood. “It’s OK, really,” Callum encouraged.