by S. C. Ransom
“I’m sorry,” I blustered quickly. “I was trying to find the loo and I saw Rob. How is he doing?”
She smiled encouragingly. “I don’t think it’ll be too long now. There’s nothing physically wrong with him that we can find. I was just about to come and get you all actually; he might wake up quicker if you talk to him.”
“Oh, right, that’s good then, isn’t it?” I stood there, uncertain of what to do next. The nurse was obviously used to dealing with relatives, and came over to the door and took me by the arm. She led me gently to Rob’s bedside.
“You make a start, and I’ll go and get his parents, OK?” She nodded at me, and I nodded carefully back. “I won’t be a minute. There’s no need to panic.”
“OK, it’s fine, really.” I stood up straighter and smiled at her, putting my hand on the chrome bar at the side of the bed. The second she was out of the door I leaned over Rob. If there was nothing I could do to save him, the least I could do was to comfort him and tell him what to do, however much I disliked him. But I had to be quick.
“Rob, it’s Alex. I know you can hear me, and I know that you have no idea of who you are or who I am for that matter. I’m really, really sorry about what happened, that I couldn’t stop it. But it has happened, and I want to try and make it easier for you now. There’s no way back.”
I bit back the catch in my voice. How could I possibly tell him that he was dying? Wouldn’t it be kinder not to know, to just drift off into the apparently welcoming fog? But I couldn’t get him to go before his mum saw him; that would be too, too cruel.
“Rob, it’s not yet time, but when you feel ready, go to the fog; that will be the best, believe me. But your mum is just coming now, though. Wait for her, please.”
I reached over the railing and picked up his lifeless hand, remembering all too well what it felt like to be on the other side. It was all such a mess. I lifted his hand up towards my lips, holding it tightly in both my hands and kissed it briefly. “Bye, Rob, I have to go now. Remember, go to the fog. Take care.” I pressed it against my cheek before laying it gently back down again. I was done. I turned away, too spent to cry any more.
“Alex?” asked an unexpected voice. “What are you wittering on about? What fog? And where the hell am I?”
I spun round. Rob was sitting up, rubbing his wrist and looking at me with a puzzled expression.
I looked at him, stunned. Rob was shaking his head and rubbing his eyes as if he had just woken from a long sleep.
“What’s going on, Alex? Where am I?” He stopped briefly and peered at me closely. “What’s happened to your face?”
I could feel myself starting to hyperventilate. This wasn’t possible; he should be dead, or nearly dead, not sitting up and talking. “Rob?” I finally found my voice. “Rob – you’re OK!” I couldn’t help myself, and grabbed his hands. “You’re not dead!”
“Huh, no, obviously,” he said in a slightly bemused voice. “Where am I?” he repeated, looking around the treatment room. “What are you doing here? And what was all that stuff about fog?”
My mind was racing. Whatever Lucas had done hadn’t killed him. “Look, Rob, you’re in hospital. The doctors will tell you everything, but you’ve been unconscious for a while. What do you remember?”
“I remember everything, I think,” he said with a frown. “I’m not sure why you’re here though, pleasant as it is.” He gave me a brief smile.
“So what exactly is the last thing you do remember?”
He lay back on his pillows for a moment and considered the ceiling. “It’s all pretty clear really. I was on my way to, oh, what was it?” He paused for a second and my heart almost stopped. Then the frown cleared from his face. “Yes! That was it. I was on my way to the pub in Richmond. We’re going to see the new James Bond film tonight with the others.” He glanced quickly towards his wrist where his watch would be, but the nurses had taken it off. “Have we missed it? What’s the time?”
I realised that my fingernails were digging into my palms and that I had been holding my breath. I slowly exhaled. “I’m afraid it’s a bit later than that. We went to the cinema weeks ago.”
“We did? Are you sure?”
“Absolutely sure. It’s July now, term has ended.”
He suddenly sat bolt upright. “No! How did that happen? Why don’t I remember?”
“I’m not sure. Maybe the doctors will know, but you sort of collapsed, and you’ve been unconscious for the last four or five hours. That’s all I can tell you.”
“And it’s now July, right?”
I nodded in response, gripping the bars of his bed tightly. I couldn’t quite believe any of it. I had watched Lucas drain him and go, so why wasn’t he dead?
“Freaky.” Rob lay back down again. “Really freaky…” I could see him thinking and he turned to look at me, a question in his eyes. “So if we went to the cinema weeks ago, but you are with me here now, does that mean that we…?” He left the question hanging, but his smile was turning into more of a leer.
“No, Rob. We didn’t,” I said firmly.
“Are you sure? I distinctly remember that I was going to give it a go.” The leer was in full evidence now.
“Actually, we had one date and decided that it wasn’t going to work.”
“Really? That’s a shame.” His hand found mine. “You don’t fancy giving it another chance then, do you? Just to help my recuperation, obviously.”
“It’s a tempting thought, Rob, but no. We decided that what we both wanted were two very different things.”
“Oh, well, maybe later.” He looked so smug and sure of himself, and yet again I wondered what it was I had ever seen in him. “So I’ve been unconscious for four hours but forgotten what? Four weeks?”
“More like five or six, I guess.” I needed to check quickly, as voices were now approaching down the corridor. “So while you were unconscious, did you dream at all?”
“Nah. I was on the way to the pub, then suddenly I was waking up here, listening to you talk drivel. What was it you were saying again?”
I laughed as convincingly as I could manage. “It was just drivel. The nurse said to talk to you as it would help bring you back round. I think I was explaining about some school trip or other. I forget now.” As I said it Rob’s parents came through the door, his mum with a huge smile on her face, his dad still looking suspiciously at me.
“You still here?” he scowled. I backed away from the bed, seeing my opportunity to escape before the discussions about what had been going on started.
“I’m just leaving, Mr Underwood. Bye, Rob, glad to see you back in the land of the living.”
“Oh, OK, Alex. See you soon. Steady on, Mum, what do you think you’re doing?” The last part was muffled as Mrs Underwood wrapped him in a huge bear hug. I hurriedly made for the door.
Outside, the streets were packed with people. It was rush hour again. I had no idea where I was, having arrived in the back of an ambulance, but I knew someone who could help. With a feeling of huge contentment I looked at the bracelet on my wrist, seeing the flecks of gold glinting in the afternoon sun. I pulled out my earphones as I started to walk. “Callum, everything is OK. Come and find me when you can. I’m walking down…” I paused as I came to a junction and read the sign. “Tottenham Court Road. Come and find me soon.”
Callum arrived within minutes, and quickly directed me to a quiet square where we could sit and talk unobtrusively. Despite being exhausted I was bouncing with excitement. I could barely sit still as I set myself up on a bench in a corner, the mirror propped up on the armrest, luxuriating in the fact that Callum was back. He was right behind me, obviously confused about my behaviour.
“Are you OK, Alex?” he asked gently. “Was the end … bad?”
“It wasn’t bad at all – Rob’s absolutely fine!”
“What? What do you mean?”
“I mean that he woke up and had a conversation with me! He’s OK.”
“I
thought you said that Lucas had drained him, that he had got enough and disappeared like Catherine?”
“Well, he certainly disappeared, but he definitely only got a few of Rob’s memories. He seems to have forgotten just the last month or so. Perhaps for Lucas that was enough,” I added wonderingly. Having watched him dissolve into that puddle of glittering sparks I was pretty sure he wasn’t coming back. But the most exciting question was where he had gone, and what was it that I had done that had changed things?
Callum was clearly about to start asking me more questions so I stopped him. I didn’t want to start discussing theories until I had a few more answers, and there was no point getting him excited until I knew for sure if Lucas was going back to St Paul’s, until I understood. “Enough about Rob; I don’t care about him right now, I just want to enjoy being here with you.” He looked at me with such tenderness that I thought my heart would burst with love. He was back in my arms and for now, all was well.
“What I don’t understand,” Callum asked eventually, “is why I couldn’t get through to you in your dreams. I seem to manage it with all sorts of other people, but every opportunity with you failed.”
“I rarely remember my dreams, but I suppose I never had a reason to tell you that. I remembered the one about Richmond that first night, but after that, nothing. I kept waking up feeling like I was missing some vital clue though. Was that you?”
“I guess. I kept trying, just in case, because it made me feel closer to you.” The arm around me tightened, and I could feel the gossamer touch of it against my shoulder.
“When did you realise that Catherine had stolen the amulet?”
“It was really weird. I was coming towards your house with Olivia. She was still feeling miserable about mucking things up, but excited about seeing the dog again, when suddenly everything around me seemed to shift.”
“What do you mean?”
“It was as if someone had put a slightly different colour filter over my world, but with no way of seeing what it had been like before. Everything just changed. Olivia didn’t notice anything but I was worried, so I got her to run faster. I had a good fix on the amulet, it was near your house so I wasn’t too worried, then it suddenly started to move quickly and I knew you had got on a train or in a car or something, and I lost track of you. Olivia and I stopped, wondering what to do next. I knew you had been planning to take the dog for a walk, but obviously your plans had changed and I had no way of working out what they were.
“Olivia and I went back to St Paul’s, and I waited around, not really knowing what to do. I just had this awful feeling that something wasn’t quite right. You didn’t call, so I didn’t know where to go. Eventually I couldn’t stand it any more and went to your house, hoping that you’d be back before I had to return to London for the night. I didn’t want to be spying on you, but I went to your room to try and find out where you might have gone. And there you were, battered and beaten, with no amulet and an awful, dreadful aura. I… I…”
“I know,” I said quickly, as his eyes shut tightly for a moment. “I remember sitting there that night hoping that you were watching me but with no way of knowing. I’m glad that you were actually there.” I reached behind me to stroke his face, ignoring the puzzled look of a woman in a suit who was passing by. “When did you realise it was Catherine who had taken it?”
“There weren’t that many possible suspects really. It would have been a huge coincidence for someone else to have mugged you. I could hardly bear to leave you, not when you were in such a bad way, but I knew that I had to find her. I ran back towards Twickenham, trying to retune in to the amulet. Once I knew why it had changed, that someone else was wearing it, it was a bit easier. I found her in Richmond and gave her a very unpleasant shock.” His face was grim.
“What did you do?”
“I can be pretty loud too, especially when I sneak up on someone.” His stony features twitched into something that wasn’t quite a grin. “She embarrassed herself pretty spectacularly in that pub, I can tell you.”
“Good, she deserved it.”
“She deserved rather more than that, but unfortunately she was able to resist me very well.” He paused for a moment, reliving the evening. “I had to go back to St Paul’s then, but first thing in the morning I came back out to you, hoping that you would still be asleep. I thought I had managed to get into your dream, but I couldn’t be sure, and it was so frustrating to see you there and not be able to communicate with you at all. Once I realised that you weren’t going to school I shot off to do my gathering, then came back to spend the rest of the day with you. I couldn’t believe the bruises you had. I could kill her!”
I remembered I had been looking at my injuries in the big hall mirror when Josh had spotted them too. “It was luck that she missed my head,” I said with feeling, “otherwise it would have been me in the hospital again.”
“Don’t even say that!” Callum shuddered at the idea. “At least you had Josh there, and Grace, keeping you safe.” He paused for a moment and smiled. “So you told Grace about me?”
I nodded. “I had to speak with someone; I was going mad trying to deal with everything alone. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Why would I mind? I was just hugely impressed that you got her to believe what you were saying when you had absolutely no proof.”
“It was such a relief.” It was my turn to smile. “She’s very keen to meet you, you know. She would have been here helping me but for some long-standing visit to her grandparents. Instead she’s been feeding me information when I needed it. Luckily for me she really doesn’t like Catherine.”
“I’m glad you had some help. I knew Catherine wasn’t a nice person, but I had never thought that she was downright evil, and with murderous tendencies too.”
“She and Rob actually made quite a good couple, I think. Wicked, the pair of them.” I shook my head, trying to dislodge the thought. “So were you following me all the time after that?”
“Yes, I stayed with you as you walked around Richmond. I knew she was following you, I could sense the amulet, but I couldn’t find a way to get your attention, and then, when she confronted you on the towpath, well…” He paused for a moment and took a deep breath. “When she told you I was incandescent with rage she wasn’t even close.”
“That was an awful moment, just awful,” I agreed, thinking back to that rainy day when I thought that all hope was lost. I couldn’t help reaching for the amulet to check that it was still safe on my wrist.
“I made her life hell after that, believe me.”
“What I don’t understand is why she had such a vendetta against me. I mean, she had all my memories, so thanks to me she got a real life back. What was it that ticked her off so badly?”
“I wish I knew. While she was wearing the amulet I kept a careful eye on her, but she never seemed cheerful about anything. Of course, it would have been easier to be sure if I had actually been able to see her aura. She does seem massively depressed.”
“She said something odd to me on the train; that everything was my fault, that I was the one who let Rob know everything and set all this in motion. But I don’t understand why that would make her hate me so. It doesn’t make any sense.”
Callum frowned. “Perhaps she meant that you shouldn’t have found the amulet?”
“No, it has to have something to do with the memory that Olivia took. Has Olivia been able to give you any clues about it yet?”
Callum shook his head silently.
“Can’t she even give you the flavour of it?”
“No, she’s too scarred by it, whatever it is.”
“Poor kid! I keep forgetting that it’s different to when Catherine took all my memories and you took the copy to save my life.”
“That’s not gathering, it’s totally wiping clean, and is completely different. When everything streams out, the good and the bad, it comes complete. It surprised me a bit, I can tell you.” He paused for a second and hel
d me tighter. “That’s what made it possible for me to keep your memory of our island.” He kissed the top of my ear and smiled at me, remembering.
I smiled back; he had needed just one really good memory to stay sane, so he had swapped his memory of that encounter for mine. So now we both knew exactly how we felt about each other, and no one would ever be able to convince us otherwise again.
I suddenly felt guilty for letting my thoughts get so sidetracked; we had some problems to sort out. “So, what does Olivia say that the general feeling is for that memory? Does that help us at all?”
“I can’t ask her to even try; she’s really struggling now. Whatever that memory was, whatever Catherine had locked up in her warped brain, it was pure poison. And of course Olivia feels really responsible for all the mess.”
“But she mustn’t! It really wasn’t her fault, any of it. Will you let me talk to her?”
“She’s not really up to talking to anyone at the moment. Now I know you are safe I can try to help her properly, so maybe in time we’ll find out.”
My heart went out to her, and I wished there was something, anything, I could do to make her young life better. “Give her my love when you see her, won’t you? Tell her that Beesley will be back soon and I’ll be able to take him for some more walks.”
Callum smiled weakly. “I’ll tell her, I’m sure it will help.”
Both of us fell silent for a moment, lost in our own thoughts. I couldn’t fathom what it was I had seemingly done to upset Catherine, and that was all tied up now with Olivia. I felt torn: the largest part of me was swamped with relief that Callum was back by my side, and that the threats we had been facing had been, for the most part, dealt with. But part of me was horrified by what was happening to Olivia. She was just a child and didn’t deserve any of this. My thoughts kept returning to what Catherine had crowed about at the station. She had said that Olivia had stolen the memory of how the Dirges could escape, and woven through all of that was why Catherine loathed me. Something in that, some detail she couldn’t see or understand had almost unhinged Olivia’s mind. Was it the hatred that had scarred Olivia?