Knead to Know

by Liz Schulte

Guilt immediately ate at me, but it was for Boone’s own good. Getting to really know me would cause nothing but problems in his life. I could barely take care of myself—and I definitely couldn’t protect him from the Abyss. He had a life and a business and apparently a really awesome gift that he had already learned to live with. Besides, I had other problems to worry about. Problems like finding my next meal and dealing with Garret who already knew too much. All I could really hope was that Boone was wrong.

  We avoided each other for the rest of the day, and only the sound of the door opening and closing that evening indicated when he left. It was for the best. For the first time in hours, I left the kitchen. The room looked amazing. The cabinets had been sanded and painted and were hung and base cupboards were in place, just waiting for the countertop. He had even started refinishing the little table I’d bought on a whim to go in the store window. It was perfect.

  Tears filled my eyes. Part of me wished I could have trusted him. There was a time I would have. I never used to be like this, but now paranoia ate at me. It had ever since Baker told me this other world existed. I thought being stronger would make me feel safer, but it didn’t. If anything I felt more at risk this way than I had as a human. I wiped pink tears from my eyes. Maybe once I had everything figured out, Boone and I could be friends.

  The bell chimed and the door opened. “Boone, everything is—” Only it wasn’t Boone. It was Garret. “Oh . . . hi.”

  He was the last person I expected to see again, though I’d thought about how I should handle the situation all day. Telling him the truth about me wasn’t an option and neither was telling Holden and letting him “disappear” him. There was only one other way I could think of, but it was risky. As a half vampire I had most of the powers a full vampire had. I was inhumanly strong, I could move fast, and though I had never tried it before, I was willing to bet I could compel humans. Corbin was really the only vampire I knew, but I’d watched him do it. How hard could it be? He touched their arm, looked in their eyes, and suddenly they were putty in his hands. I could do that.

  He took a deep breath. “Maggie. We need to talk.”

  “Sure. About what?” I stepped toward him and he didn’t back up. At least that was a good sign.

  “The red eyes. The healing. Are you a…” He shook his head. “I know this sounds crazy, but I also know what I saw.”

  I nodded. “I know how it must look, and I’d like to explain.” I advanced as if approaching a feral animal with a slight smile.

  His shoulders relaxed a little.

  I put my hand on his exposed arm and his face didn’t change at all. I stared deep into those once open, now suspicious brown eyes. They locked to mine, pupils dilating. “My eye was red because of allergies. I get ocular migraines, and what you think was rapid healing was just a mistake. I only had a scratch.” I willed him to believe me.

  “Just a scratch?” he said softly.

  St. Sebastian’s cupcake, it had worked!

  The door chimed and Boone re-entered, holding a bag of take out. I glanced over at him and smiled. Garret wasn’t going to rat me out. I took care of it all on my own. But before I could celebrate my victory, Garret’s face changed. It filled with fear and his mouth fell open. “Demon,” he hissed and then raced out the door, knocking into Boone as he went.

  We both stared after him.

  Okay . . . maybe it hadn’t worked as well as I thought.

  I ran my fingers through my hair. This sucked.

  “I’ve never seen a grown man move that fast,” Boone said.

  I was going to have to call Holden. I was out of choices. “I thought you were gone for the day.”

  He held up the bag in his hand. The delicious smell of Chinese food wafted toward me. Oh, I was hungry! “Neither of us has eaten all day.”

  It was more like three weeks, but who was counting? I led him to the kitchen and got us drinks and a Dark Side cupcake for dessert. I picked at the cashew chicken on my plate until I couldn’t force myself to take another bite. “Everything out front looks great. Thank you so much—and the tables and chairs come tomorrow.”

  He nodded. “We’re ready.”

  I pushed away the mostly uneaten plate. I never meant for anyone to get hurt, especially Garret who had been so nice to me. Opening a bakery was stupid. Why had I thought I could live a normal life?

  “Are you worried about the reporter?”

  I blinked. “How do you know what Garret does?” I waited for Boone to deflect as he always did. It was hard to say why I kept asking questions. Sometimes it was best not to know everything. Maybe I’d needlepoint that onto a pillow—I had forever.

  “I just know things. I can’t explain it because I don’t know how it works. I’ll see someone or hear them talking and know the truth. Other times I get very clear images in my head. And I’ve had more episodes since I met you than I’d had in my lifetime to date. That’s why I think we were supposed to find each other. Whatever gave me this gift also gave me you. I believe that.”

  I clasped my shaking hands together in my lap. “That’s why you think you need to help me?”

  He took another mouthful of noodles and stared at me. “Crazy, right?”

  I shook my head. Not crazy, but probably not accurate either. “So you’re a psychic.”

  He made a noncommittal noise.

  If vampires and angels and jinn existed, why not psychics too? I empathized with the risk Boone was taking by telling me all this, and I glanced up at him for just a moment before looking away again. Maybe he was lonely too. It wasn’t easy being different from everyone else even if it was in a way others couldn’t see. “What if I told you I don’t need a taste tester for my cupcakes because I’m diabetic?” He didn’t say anything. “What if I said it was because I can’t taste food?”

  My uneaten dinner sat between us and I held my breath as I waited for him to speak. He didn’t.

  Now that I’d started this confession, I couldn’t stop. I wanted to tell him everything. “Then what if I further told you, that Garret maybe has a good reason to be afraid of me. I am the monster he thinks I am.” I chewed on my thumbnail. I was toeing a dangerous line with these what ifs, but Boone was practically one of us.

  He shook his head. “You’re a good person. He’s an asshat.”

  I rubbed my hands over my face, then dropped them to the table. “I’m a vampire.”

  He chuckled. “Sure you are.”

  Instead of arguing, I picked up my fork and slammed it into my hand. Boone’s eyes widened and he reached for me, but I pulled away, withdrew the fork, and held up my hand so he could see. It wasn’t that I didn’t feel pain, because I did. It hurt like a son of a bitch, but it was short-lived and the wound immediately began to close.

  Boone was unblinking as he took my hand and felt the spot I stabbed. Seconds turned to minutes and neither of us spoke, but at least he didn’t run away. I could hear his heart beat faster in the silence.

  “I’ve never met a vampire,” he said conversationally.

  A giggle broke from me and I clapped my hand over my mouth, but kept laughing. Telling him was a completely selfish thing to do. I knew that, but it felt so good to not be isolated. I didn’t have to tell him about the rest of the Abyss. He only had to know about me. “Half, actually.”

  He rubbed his jaw. “That’s what Garret knows about you?”

  My leg bounced up and down. “I don’t know what he thinks he knows. He saw me heal this morning, sort of, by accident. I told him it was just a scratch, but well, you saw the blood in the kitchen. Oh, and he caught a glimpse of my eyes.”

  “What’s wrong with your eyes?”

  “My irises are red—and they’re brighter when I haven’t fed and it’s been a while. Again it was an accident. He wasn’t supposed to see either and now both of our lives are in danger. If he talks about it or, worse, reports it, then…let’s just say there are repercussions.”

  “From the other vampires?”

 
; “Sort of.” Not really, but I’d given Boone enough to swallow for one day. “So that’s my secret.” I picked up the cupcake I brought over for desert and offered it to him. “I didn’t want to freak you out.”

  “I’m glad you told me.” He accepted the cupcake, carefully peeling back the paper. “You’re going to need a better taste tester than me.” He took nearly half of it in one bite. A smile melted over his face and his eyes closed a little as he chewed. “It’s good.” He took another bite. “Really good,” he mumbled around the cake and oozing chocolate.

  Warmth spread through me and I grinned. It was like a huge weight had been lifted from me. I wanted to hug him, but managed to keep my hands in my lap. “You’re not scared?”

  He nodded. “Relieved actually. I didn’t know why you were inspiring so many visions. Maybe it’s because of what you are. You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll keep your secret.” He polished off the cupcake. “But what are you going to do about Garret?”

  “Nothing,” I said automatically. “He can’t go around accusing me of being a vampire. Who would believe that? Vampires aren’t real. You’re a psychic and even you didn’t believe me. I’m just going to let this blow over.”

  “What about the repercussions?” he asked.

  “He has as much to lose as I do,” I said. “Surely he won’t destroy his own life for an article no one will believe, right?”

  Boone shook his head. “I don’t know. It doesn’t feel like he’s going to let this go.”

  I cleaned up our dishes. Calling in Holden was like calling the army about a shoplifter. If I wanted to live in the human world, these were the things I needed to handle on my own. “I have another option, but it’s strictly a last-ditch measure. I want to give Garret a chance to move on first.”

  Boone reached across the counter and took my cupcake. It would have been so easy to ask him about the guy in the alley, but I didn’t. He’d already shut me down twice, and right now I wanted to live in the happiness of finally having someone to confide in. “How many people know about what you can do?”

  He swallowed his bite. “No one. You’re the only person I’ve told.”

  “Why?”

  He shrugged. “I haven’t always been able to do it.” His phone chimed and he pulled it out of his pocket, then hopped up, plopping the last bit of cake into his mouth. “I completely lost track of time. I have to go. I’ll try to think of something you can do to convince the reporter that you’re just like everyone else.”

  He grabbed his tools and was out the door in a flash. It occurred to me that I didn’t know anything about him. Was he married? He didn’t wear a ring, but not everyone did. Did he have a girlfriend, a family, a dog? And if yes to any of it, why was he willing to put anything on the line for me?

  Almost the instant Boone disappeared, Phoenix stepped up to the bakery’s front door. He was wearing all black, mostly leather, and his dark hair was brushed back from his face. He nodded to me, the left side of his lips curling into a sexy half smile as I let him in.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked as I pulled the shades, keeping my distance from him.

  “I’ve been thinking about you all day.” His voice was low and too close to me.

  I whirled around, inching as far away from him as I could. “Stay back.” I raised my hands, almost taking a defensive stance.

  “Why?” He slowly advanced.

  “I don’t want to hurt you,” I whispered. If he touched me tonight, I wouldn’t be able to stop feeding.

  His tongue traced the edge of his top lip. “What if I like it?”

  I laughed nervously and moved toward the kitchen. “You might not like being dead, though.”

  His grin widened. My back hit the wall. I had misjudged where the door was. He stood in front of me, nearly touching, but not quite. “About that deal,” he said smoothly. “How would you like a free sample to help with your decision?”

  “I already said no,” I managed to say somewhat normally.

  Phoenix winked. “Never take a first answer. Holden taught me that.” His cheek was so close to mine I could practically feel it. “I can give you want you need.”

  I closed my eyes, having trouble breathing. “I could kill you,” I said slowly, with emphasis, hoping this time he would understand.

  “Not tonight.” Something soft hit my chest and I cracked open an eye to see my white blazer lying over me. “Put that on and come with me.”

  I slipped my arms into my jacket and didn’t argue as I followed him out the front door, locking it behind me. He didn’t wait for me so I rushed to catch up. “Don’t you have a nightclub to be at?”

  “Yes,” he said. “But you weren’t going to come back to me on your own.”

  That was true. “Where are we going?”

  He flashed a grin. “Not knowing is half the fun.”

  This was wrong. Whatever we were doing here was wrong, but I kept with him. I had come this far and I wasn’t going to turn back. Phoenix was friends with Holden. Apart from that, I didn’t know a ton about him. He now had Holden’s old job of being in charge of this region of jinn, but what that meant in the wake of their freedom from demon control, I had no idea. But I knew him well enough to know he wasn’t going to hurt me. Not because of any emotional connection, but because he owed too much to Holden and Olivia.

  Phoenix stopped outside a red leather door and looked me up and down. “Lose the contacts.”

  I shook my head. I wouldn’t have anywhere to put them and it wasn’t like I had sunglasses with me. “Someone will see.”

  “We want them to see. That’s the point. Trust me.”

  I swallowed back my fear and plucked out my lenses, sighing with relief as the burning sensation I lived with all day finally ceased.

  “Feels good, doesn’t it?” Phoenix said, leaning in too close again.

  I met his dark stare.

  “The contacts, the bakery, the starving, that’s not who you are.” I swallowed, my mouth watering and my thoughts fuzzy. “I saw you last night. The real you. The one who takes what she wants.”

  I shook my head because I couldn’t speak. That wasn’t the real me.

  “On the other side of this door, you can be her any time you want. No one will stop you. Do you want me to show you?”

  He was the devil, but the offer was too good to refuse. I gave into the temptation, dragging my lips along the column of his neck, taking what I needed from him. His fingers threaded through my hair, but he didn’t pull away. A coarse rumble started deep in his chest as he lifted me against the door, using his body to pin me there, blue flames dancing in his eyes. I cupped his face, pulling him against me harder, sinking my teeth into his lip, making him hiss. He slowly slid me back to my feet.

  But it was too late to stop what he’d started. The hunger wouldn’t be beaten down again. I reached for him, but he pulled away and managed to avoid me. “Not me,” he said, taking me by the shoulders and turning me toward them door. “Them.”

  He opened the red door and I stepped inside.

  Chapter 5