by Betty Neels
After tea she went up to her room, to find that someone had unpacked for her, so that all she had to do was to take a bath and change her dress. Mevrouw van Germert had told her that there would only be the three of them and that a short dress would do, which was a mercy, since Annis had brought only a long evening skirt with her and a couple of silk blouses to go with it. She would have to go out in the morning and buy something… She got into the silvery grey silk jersey which offset her hair and eyes so well, put on the strapped sandals with their ridiculous high heels and went downstairs, not hurrying in case she tripped up in them. She was on the last graceful curve of the staircase when she saw Jake watching her from the hall. He was sitting in a high-backed chair, his crutches on the floor beside him. Before she could reach him he had picked them up and was standing to meet her.
‘Hullo, my dear. You look good enough to eat. Have you enjoyed your day?’
‘Very much.’ She was surprised to find that she had. ‘And you?’
He bent and kissed her before he replied. ‘Oh, yes, I enjoyed my day too. I’ve had my leg looked at and we’ve decided to keep the walking iron for another month; the tib’s fine but the fib’s not quite as it should be,’ and at her anxious look: ‘No, nothing wrong, just being slow to knit.’ He began to walk along the hall beside her. ‘I’ve settled all the forms and so on for our wedding—three weeks tomorrow. Mama will see to the actual reception and so on, I’ll see about the church ceremony—all you will have to do is let us have a list of people you would like to come. Would you like to go over to England before we’re married? Clothes? Go into a huddle with the bridesmaid? Hairdresser…what else do girls do when they get married?’
She laughed. ‘All those, but I don’t think I need to go back. I’ll buy what I want here and I shall only need my hair trimmed, I do it myself.’
He stopped to look at her. ‘Your hair is glorious. Do you mean to say it curls like that without any of the hairdresser’s arts?’
‘Well, yes.’ She couldn’t think of anything else to say; he had paid her two compliments in as many minutes and he had sounded exactly like Freddy when he, on rare occasions, told her she looked all right. Probably Jake looked at her with the same brotherly eye as Freddy, she brooded gloomily, and wished heartily that she had had a new dress to put on—something to make him raise those thick eyebrows of his.
But it was impossible to feel gloomy for more than a few minutes. Dinner was a lively meal with Mevrouw van Germert full of ideas and plans while Jake sat back, smiling and listening, and Annis, quite carried away by the idea of a big wedding, joined in enthusiastically. Over coffee in the drawing room later she produced her list of guests, a small one compared to her hostess’s, who explained that the family was a large one and if one invited one cousin or uncle one must invite all the others. ‘You will be at my house, of course,’ she decreed, ‘and Jake will fetch you…’
‘Oh, will he?’ asked Annis faintly. ‘But what about being given away and all that?’
Jake laughed. ‘We do it rather differently in Holland, my dear. The groom goes to the bride’s house with her flowers and they go to the Raadhuis together; everyone else goes first.’ He grinned at her. ‘Will you mind stomping up the aisle with me on crutches?’
‘Heavens, no.’ She smiled back at him, rather mistily; it could have been so much worse than a fractured leg—head injuries, a broken back…
‘For a bride,’ said Jake very softly, ‘you’re looking uncommonly sad.’
She shook her head. ‘I’m not. Are you going back to work straight away?’
‘Tomorrow morning. I’m afraid we shan’t see much of each other, but I’ll take you down to the consulting rooms one morning, and the hospital—not a large one, but very efficient. I sometimes go to Utrecht and Amsterdam and the Hague, too; you must come along.’
‘I’d like that.’ She glowed at the thought that he wanted her company.
‘Mama will be here until the end of the week,’ went on Jake. ‘When she goes back I thought it would be nice if you stayed with her. I’ll see you each day, of course.’
She agreed pleasantly; he had arranged it all already and she wanted to do exactly what he wished. She wasn’t going to be a doormat with no mind of her own, but on the other hand, she wasn’t going to go against him without good reason. Presently she went up to bed; her future mother-in-law had given her a warm kiss as they said goodnight, much warmer than Jake’s.
The week went quickly—there was so much to do; the house to explore, sometimes with Mevrouw van Germert, sometimes with Cor or the housekeeper, and just once or twice, with Jake. It was beautiful and it was loved as well, its many rooms still furnished with pieces which had been made when the house had been built, polished and smooth with their age. What was more, they were used. Annis, smoothing a careful hand down old damask curtains and touching the silver on the massive side-table, knew that she was going to love the house just as much as Jake so obviously did.
She went with him to his surgery too, in the heart of the little town. It took up the whole of the ground floor of an old house let out as offices. His partners welcomed her with patent pleasure—Wim, the younger of the two, and Huib, married and only a little younger than Jake. It was a busy practice with many patients living in the small villages around Goes, and as Jake was at pains to explain, it was the other two who did most of the work, because he was engaged on research work which took up a good deal of his time. Annis met the receptionist too, a young woman who had been with them for some time, and the nurse, a middle-aged housewife who ran her home and the practice with equal efficiency. And watching Jake talking to them, immaculate in his dark suit and sober tie, it was hard to equate him with the sweater-clad man on Spitzbergen, although he himself hadn’t changed. She wondered now how she could ever have disliked him, even briefly. And even more she wondered how she could ever have thought that she was in love with Ola. Life, thought Annis, nipping down the narrow passage ahead of Jake so that he had room to use his crutches, was very strange. And exciting; there was always the challenge of making him love her. She turned as they reached the waiting Cor and the car to smile at him and say: ‘It’s all so different, isn’t it? Don’t you miss Spitzbergen?’
‘Yes; life was simple there, wasn’t it? One day we’ll go back there, but not yet.’ His dark eyes had rested on her face and she knew that he was remembering Ola.
By the end of the week she was beginning to feel at home. She knew the several servants by name, could find her way round the old house without getting lost and had made friends with Mike, the Irish wolfhound, as well as the kitchen cats. She had gone shopping too, refusing Jake’s offer to drive her to the Hague or Amsterdam, for as she pointed out sensibly, she didn’t want a great deal; undies and one or two dresses and slacks and sweaters. They wouldn’t be going on a honeymoon; it would have meant taking Cor with them to drive the car, since she still had to apply for a driving licence. They would travel later, Jake had promised her, and she had been content with that. Just being with him would do very nicely; she didn’t ask for more.
The move to Mevrouw van Germert’s house was made majestically in a large BMW because, as she observed to Annis, she liked to travel comfortably. A short square man was at the wheel and was introduced as Hans. He loaded Mevrouw van Germert’s luggage into the boot, helped her in with care, did the same for Annis and got behind the wheel where he sat patiently while Cor had a few last words with Annis and Mevrouw van Germert. Jake wasn’t there; he had left the house early, although he had left a message to say that he would see them both that evening.
The BMW proceeded at a stately pace through the centre of the town and out the other side and, rather to Annis’s surprise, picked up speed on the main road, leaving the town behind them.
‘Have we far to go?’
‘No, my dear, it’s not too far away. Just this side of Bergen-op-Zoom. We have a small house in the Wouwse Plantage, which is this side of the town. My husband left
it to me during my lifetime; it has always been the custom for the wife, if she is widowed, to leave the house in Goes to the eldest son, so that his wife may live there with him without the hampering presence of a mother-in-law. I find it a splendid idea.’
It was, but Annis wasn’t sure if it would be quite polite to agree. She said with some diplomacy: ‘I hope we shall see you often, Mevrouw van Germert.’
‘I shall come when you invite me, my dear,’ said her companion crisply, and went on: ‘This is a dull road, but the country is very pretty presently.’
She was right. Once across the narrow neck of land between Goes and Bergen there were small woods, even a hill or two, and pretty little villas tucked in between them. A few miles short of Bergen Hans took a side road towards the Belgian border and after five minutes’ drive turned into a sandy lane between trees. The house at the end of it was much smaller than the one in Goes and quite different, with an elaborate roof all gables and little windows and balconies, and a pretty garden.
‘Very quiet,’ stated Mevrouw van Germert, ‘and safe from traffic; excellent for the children.’ She smiled and her handsome face softened. ‘Jake must have climbed every tree here. I daresay his sons will do the same.’
Annis blushed, not because she was shy about future children but because she felt guilty because Jake’s mother didn’t know that he was marrying her more for convenience than anything else. She got out of the car, resolving that she and Jake would have to have a talk. The prospect of a little Jake and perhaps a sister to even things up didn’t worry her in the least; indeed, she liked the idea very much, but Jake might have different ideas.
The house inside was pretty, its furniture mostly Regency, its delicate lines surprisingly at variance with Mevrouw van Germert’s imposing person. They went at once to a small sitting room, where they perched on unlikely gilt chairs while an elderly woman served them sherry. ‘Antonia,’ introduced Mevrouw van Germert. ‘She has been with me a long time now.’ She sipped for a few moments. ‘You shall go to your room presently, my dear. Look upon this house as your temporary home. I hope you will be happy here.’
She had spoken so kindly that Annis got up and went to kiss her cheek with an involuntary: ‘How kind you are! You know so little about me and yet you have made me welcome.’
Mevrouw van Germert patted the sofa beside her and Annis sat down.
‘But you are welcome. Oh, my dear, if you knew the number of times I have had to welcome Jake’s girlfriends and how I longed to show them the door. Beautiful creatures, all of them, and not one of them loving Jake. Just, I am happy to say, as he didn’t love any of them. All the same, I had some bad moments.’
Annis took a gulp of sherry and told herself she was a fool to mind about Jake’s girl-friends. He was good-looking enough and rich enough to pick and choose—besides, his mother had said that he hadn’t loved one of them. She went upstairs presently to the charming room prepared for her and sat down on the bed. She gave herself a lecture on being jealous about something she knew almost nothing about—after all, it could have been Mevrouw van Germert’s own opinion of the girls—and promised herself that she wouldn’t think any more about it. She didn’t keep it, of course. The rest of the day was filled with speculation, doubt and a vague unhappiness, despite the fact that most of it was filled with an inspection of the house and the garden, and a long session with her hostess, looking through a family album in which photos of Jake in various stages of growing up predominated.
He came that evening, after dinner, and she felt shy of him as well as peevish. He was quick to see it and she realised that for each time she looked at him he was staring at her with half amused speculation. When his mother went away presently to telephone, he wasted no time.
‘You look ready to burst into tears, Annis. What’s happened? Aren’t you happy to come here?’
‘I’m very happy here,’ she told him stiffly, and bent her head to murmur to Mike, who had come with him.
‘Then it’s something I’ve done—or not done?’ he persisted. ‘Come on, don’t be a silly girl—tell!’
Just like Freddy, she thought bitterly. Why did men always call one a silly girl when all one wanted was a little sympathy?
‘There’s nothing to tell.’
‘No?’ He got up and came across the room to her and pulled her to her feet, wrapped his arms around her, gutter crutches and all, and kissed her gently. ‘Well?’
It was impossible to keep silent. ‘You’ve had so many girl-friends,’ she muttered miserably into his shoulder. ‘So why pick on me…?’
His eyes were dark and she couldn’t read the expression in them. ‘Isn’t it obvious, my dear Annis? I didn’t want to marry any of them, but I do want to marry you.’ His hands tightened on her. ‘None of them were serious.’
Which made her feel mean because he could so easily have reminded her of Ola and he hadn’t. She managed to smile. ‘I’m sorry, I am a fool, aren’t I—It’s just that I’m not quite used to it all, I expect.’
He took his arms away and put one hand into a pocket. ‘Which reminds me, this may make you feel it’s all deadly serious.’ He took out a little box and opened it. There was a ring inside, a huge sapphire surrounded by diamonds. ‘I hope it fits, it’s old and been in the family for years.’ He slipped it on her finger. ‘Good, it does. We must go shopping for wedding rings, mustn’t we?’
Annis had done some shopping while she had been in Goes, one or two pretty dresses, a jersey top and skirt, some super slacks and several silk blouses. The boutique had been expensive, but she felt justified in being extravagant; one didn’t marry all that often. And she bought boots too, long tan ones which showed off her long legs to perfection, as well as a pair of high-heeled pumps. She was glad she had now, for when Jake came the following evening he suggested that they might go out. ‘Put on a pretty dress,’ he told her. ‘I’m going to take you to Schudderbeurs—it’s a small hotel on the other side of Zierikzee and run by a charming couple.’
The Bristol made short work of the journey through the early September dusk; the lights of the hotel twinkled invitingly as they drew up before its open door. Inside it was charming, pleasantly warm, dimly lighted and with a wood fire smouldering in its great open hearth. Originally an inn, it had been modernised so well that it was impossible to see the difference. Mevrouw Bouteka met them as they went in, shook their hands, assured them that she had a table ready for them and invited them to sit by the hearth and have a drink while they chose something to eat. The chairs were comfortable and the Madeira excellent. Annis felt happiness steal over her, listening to Jake telling some trifling story about one of his partner’s children. They ate presently—lobster Thermidor, with avocado pear stuffed with shrimps first and fresh fruit salad with lashings of cream to follow it.
‘What a heavenly place,’ said Annis, pouring their coffee. ‘Do you come here often?’
He smiled at her and said deliberately: ‘I’ve brought various girl-friends here from time to time. It’s cosy, isn’t it?’
Her little glow of happiness flickered and died. She supposed he had brought her here because all the other girls had liked it. She said shortly: ‘Very cosy. Will you have some more coffee?’
He passed his cup. ‘Thanks. You look nice in that dress—did you buy it in Goes?’
‘Yes, a very nice boutique down a side street, I forget its name.’
‘We’ll go up to den Haag when we’re married and you can buy anything you want.’ He put down his cup. ‘I quite forgot to ask you. Have you any money?’
‘Yes, thank you, quite enough.’
He stared at her, his eyes narrowed. ‘Now I wonder what I’ve done…’
Annis opened her green eyes very wide. ‘Done? Nothing at all.’ She looked around her. ‘This is a delightful place.’
‘You said that just now,’ he reminded her, and leaned back in his chair, very much at his ease. ‘Since you like it so much, we must come here often. By the way, I fo
rgot to tell you there will be two English girls at the wedding, they’re married to two friends of mine—one lives in Zierikzee and the other in Middelburg. I think you’ll like them.’
‘Oh, how nice! Have they been here long?’
‘A few years now.’ He looked across to where Mevrouw Bouteka was sitting at a small table in the middle of the restaurant, writing, and she got up and came over to them and gave him the bill. ‘Don’t go before Arie has seen you,’ she begged. ‘He’ll be out in a minute.’
So they stayed another half an hour, talking to the proprietor before they finally took their leave. They drove home in almost complete silence and when they reached the house they went in together, still not speaking.
In the hall Jake said: ‘I don’t think I’ll stay, my dear. I’m off to Utrecht in the morning just for a couple of days and I must make an early start.’
Annis hadn’t expected that. All the way back she had been telling herself crossly that she didn’t care if she didn’t see him for days; let him take out one of those girl-friends of his—and now that he was going away even for so short a time, she was miserable. She longed to ask him why he was going, but since he never volunteered any information unless she did ask, she hesitated. She said lamely: ‘Oh, are you?’ And then in a rush: ‘We’re getting married in twelve days’ time…’
He stood in front of her, leaning on his crutches. ‘I hadn’t forgotten, my dear.’ He bent and kissed her with sudden urgency so that she kissed him back before she could stop herself. She said goodnight then, and started for the stairs, not looking back, so that she didn’t see the smile on his face.
It was three days before she saw him again and this time his kiss was a casual light affair on one cheek. All the same, she was so happy to see him again that she didn’t care; just seeing him was enough. He told her a little of what he’d been doing, too. ‘Though there’s still a lot to do,’ he observed. ‘Research is something which lasts one’s lifetime.’