by MJ Brannigan
“Well, I’d offer you a fish taco, but apparently I scarfed them all down looking out to see if… well. Once I saw your truck, I started looking out on the water to see if you might be there. I ended up eating four of them before I knew it,” she rolled her eyes and smiled.
“Haha, that’s funny,” Kamea replied. “What’re you doin’ tonight? Like, do you have any plans for the evening?”
“No. Was just going to go back to the B&B, maybe just do some reading, you know.”
“Just wondering—that is if you’re not totally stuffed from your fish tacos, maybe we could eat one of them here on the beach and watch the sunset?” Kamea asked.
Rebecca felt all warm at the thought; even if she didn’t feel hungry at all.
“Just wondering is all—don’t feel you have to or anything,” Kamea continued.
“Actually, that sounds nice. Can we do that?” Rebecca asked, looking around at the sand and sea, beaming.
“Sure. I can clean the fish on the back of my truck. There’s a little market about half-a-mile back up the road. We can get some butter and seasoning—foil and charcoal too, and just cook them on one of those grills over there.” Kamea raised her eyebrows, questioning what Rebecca might think about the idea.
“Sounds like a plan,” Rebecca placed her hands on her hips, and smiling; “You clean the fish, because, well, you know how. I’ll go up to the market and get a few things. How about some beers too?”
“Great! Let me put my stuff away while you do that. A cold beer sounds good too,” Kamea smiled and brushed the hair from her face. “Do you need some money?” she added as she turned to pull the kayak further onto shore.
“I got it—no worries,” Rebecca replied, surprising herself at using the phrase she’d already picked up from Kamea.
***
Rebecca found the market with ease. A few locals and tourists were milling about the store. Things were a little pricey, but from the looks of the clientele, they would have no trouble affording anything here.
For the few items she would be picking up, it wasn’t an exercise in high finances anyhow. The beer looked good—she found a local IPA that sounded appealing as she read the label, and the cans were ice-cold. So she made sure to pick up some cups too. Being from Michigan, one thing that she really appreciated was craft beer. And this was one she had never heard of before—well, worth a try, she thought.
Rebecca pulled her car into the spot closest to the little two-track next to the truck. The late afternoon sun still shimmered on the water; a gentle, cooling breeze still blowing from the north.
This is fun, she thought. Serendipity, running into Kamea like this. No pressure of who was going to call whom first. How had this happened? What kind of game was Maui playing with her?
Try as she might to put Kamea out of her mind for a while, and the thought of her tainted just a little from Laura’s admonition earlier, she couldn’t help herself from feeling happy at the sight of her. There she was, wetsuit pulled down around her waist, focused on cleaning today’s catch on the tailgate of her truck. She was a sight, to be sure.
Rebecca stopped in mid-stride with grocery bags in hand, and stood watching her new friend. A feeling of admiration sunk into her and a warmth grew in her breast; seeing Kamea so in tune with her place in the world.
CHAPTER 13 - KAMEA
“What do you think of the Kumu?” Kamea asked as Rebecca pulled apart another piece of the delicate white flesh, held in the makeshift foil plate.
“It’s delicious! I could eat like this all the time,” she replied, her eyes wide with delight.
The way Rebecca smiled as she was devouring her meal, a little butter dripping from her chin, Kamea knew the answer before even asking but thought it polite to inquire—and to break the silence that had hung between them since sitting down to eat.
They sat cross-legged on their towels in the sand, elbow to elbow, touching on occasion. Kamea could feel even the little hairs on Rebecca’s arm almost as a caress when they brushed hers.
Both faced out to sea, and toward the soon-to-be-setting sun. A few clouds had rolled in from the north above the horizon, and another set drifted in high overhead. Families, and lovers holding hands, had walked down from their condos to watch the evening light show. It was sure to be another spectacular Maui sunset.
But for sipping on beer, and small talk about their meal, they had remained quiet. Kamea was wondering what was going through Rebecca’s mind. She felt so at ease next to her. A bit too much at ease, compared to previous dates. But this wasn’t an actual date, though, was it?
Kamea watched as Rebecca gathered the remains of their meal; the foil and scraps of fish and lemons, placed it back into one of the grocery bags she had brought down to the beach and hiked it all to the nearest big plastic drum that served as a garbage can. Hips swinging side to side as she made her way through the deep sand, she walked back a couple more beers from the cooler in Kamea’s truck, and bending down, handed one to Kamea.
As their fingers touched, Kamea felt a tingle of warmth run through her. And as Rebecca sat back down next to her, she felt her press her arms against hers and tilted her head to rest briefly on Kamea’s shoulder.
“Thanks for dinner,” she said, sitting back up, the almost setting sun flooding her face with warm, orange hues.
“You’re quite lovely,” Kamea found herself saying before she could filter her thoughts.
Rebecca smiled and turned her head down to her hands.
“Did I just say that out loud?” Kamea asked with a little chuckle; “Must be the beer.”
“Thank you,” Rebecca replied. “Beer or not, it’s nice to hear it, even if I don’t quite think it’s true.”
“No, really,” Kamea responded, a little wide-eyed. She didn’t want to tell her that she hadn’t stopped thinking about the beauty of the afternoon light on her since yesterday, let alone start a painting of her to express what she felt in seeing her.
She had only gone spear fishing today—gotten out on her kayak for a paddle to get her mind on other things—back to the life she knew before Rebecca entered it. That she had shown up like this was, well, just what were the chances?
They sat in silence, enjoying the beautiful spectrum of colors as the sun disappeared over the horizon. The light continued its show long after, painting the clouds overhead in oranges and then magentas, only to leave them as silent gray witnesses against a darkening sky.
Kamea felt Rebecca’s head on her once again, moving side to side to nuzzle herself deeper into Kamea’s bare shoulder and the tender hollow below her neck.
This time, she kept it there. “That was lovely,” she said.
Kamea laid her cheek against the top of Rebecca’s head, feeling her hair tickle her face as she nuzzled into her.
Her lips brushed against Rebecca’s forehead, her breath feeling warm as it escaped her parted lips. It must be the beer. This is too cozy, too nice, maybe…
She felt herself drift into the moment, absorbing the warmth, the affection that she had almost forgotten existed. Her body followed, sinking deeper into Rebecca, surrendering into the moment of unspoken tenderness.
As Kamea let herself drift deeper, turning her lips to Rebecca’s forehead to plant a small kiss, Rebecca eased herself away, sitting erect, as though something had dawned on her, breaking whatever spell they found themselves under.
“I’m not here for a fling, really,” she said, looking at Kamea’s face in the fading light. “I… I just want you to know that,” she continued.
Feeling herself jolted awake, as though out of a dream, Kamea couldn’t quite gather her thoughts fast enough, “I… I believe you. I’m not looking for a fling either. I want you to know that too.”
Rebecca fiddled with the cup in her hand, looking at it as though she might find an answer inside it.
“But that was nice too,” Kamea said, after a few moments of silence. “It was so very nice.”
* * *
Kamea, not wanting the evening to end, but wanting to ease the tension of the moment, stood up. Reaching out her hand to Rebecca, “Put on those beach shoes—let’s go for a walk.”
Rebecca took the offered hand and allowed Kamea to help her up from the beach towel. With their fingers still intertwined, Kamea led her along the beach to a path between the rocks.
Rebecca kept her hand in Kamea’s, following behind her as she inched them up a narrow, winding trail through the rocks, higher and higher, step by careful step to a spot that overlooked the expanse of beach north and south. To the south and east, the darkness was drawing up from the horizon, with stars beginning to appear in the inky blue above.
They could see clearer to the north as the West Maui Mountains were free of clouds for the evening, their hushed mass bathed in the afterglow of the remaining light. At their base, just above the level of the water, they could make out twinkling lights running back and forth as cars made their way along the road to and from Lahaina. Most looked like they were heading towards Lahaina Town, perhaps for an evening meal.
“It’s beautiful,” Rebecca whispered, as though the oncoming darkness demanded the quiet.
“Thought you’d like it,” Kamea replied, echoing Rebecca’s hushed tone.
“You probably can’t tell in the twilight, but, well… my eyes are all watery. It’s just so pretty.” Rebecca exclaimed, still in her whispery voice.
Kamea looked at Rebecca’s eyes, and could see the teared-up pools with what little light remained reflecting in them. She could see how it touched her and was glad to share the beauty of her home with this woman whose face she also loved to look on.
They sat looking out to the expanse, much of it in silence. Their hands still together, fingers intertwined, taking turns with light caresses over the backs of each other’s hands.
Kamea couldn’t help but wonder what Rebecca was thinking—not about the view, but about them if there was a ‘them’ at all. She didn’t like the insecurity of not knowing, of the fate of her heart and happiness determined by someone else. This is why she didn’t let herself get too involved, too committed in the first place.
Now, along comes this mainland woman—this business woman, that seemed to get inside her and touch her heart. What was she to do? How involved could she allow herself to be? How close could they actually get if Rebecca was going to go back to Detroit in just over a week?
Her father was from the mainland also, from an Irish immigrant family. But he was over here for months in the army before meeting her mother. And then he stayed for years before having to go on tour elsewhere. This was different. There didn’t seem to be enough time to get to know one-another well enough, or form a long-term bond. Was there?
“What are you thinking… if you don’t mind me asking?” Kamea inquired.
Rebecca turned her face from the lights along the road to Lahaina and looked into Kamea’s eyes. “Just wondering,” she answered. “I keep thinking this had all been so different from what I expected. I thought I’d be spending my vacation like a hermit, away from emotional entanglements. Away, well… just away.”
“Maui will do that to you,” Kamea replied, attempting to lend some ease to Rebecca’s confession.
“But then you showed up to pull me off the rocks and pull me out of my self-absorbed isolation. And you, well, you’re just so different from anyone I’ve ever known. I love how you fit in here, to this magical place. How you have made a life all your own. I admire that. And, well... you’re beautiful too,” she continued. “So beautiful.”
Kamea looked down to the fingers still entwined in hers, and away from Rebecca’s gaze. Whether she could see the expression on her face in the encroaching darkness, she didn’t know. But she felt shy, like a little girl, for someone to compliment her on her life as well as her looks.
“I thought there was some sort of rescue-crush thing going on,” Rebecca continued, “I put it down to that. But now, I can’t help but find myself thinking about you a lot, and fearing it just a little bit too. I know you like to be something of a loner, independent—it’s your way, and I respect that. But...”
Kamea lifted her free hand and placed a finger on Rebecca’s lips to quiet the moment from any further confession. She didn’t want to hear Rebecca’s protest of her feelings, lest it all be an illusion in the end.
She ran the side of her finger along Rebecca’s parted lips and watched the way she closed her eyes as though to feel the moment deeper.
Rebecca turned her head, weaving it from side to side, inviting Kamea’s finger to brush each cheek, her chin, and then back to waiting lips that kissed her finger in tenderness.
Kamea felt the warmth of electricity run through her as Rebecca’s lips parted, taking the tip of her finger between them in a delicate kiss. Taking Kamea’s hand in hers, Rebecca held it, palm open to her cheek as though to feel its warmth against her.
In hushed darkness, Kamea could only surrender her being to the moment; stars overhead, waves lapping below them, and the last light on the horizon giving itself up to the night.
CHAPTER 14 - REBECCA
Rebecca spent her morning in the gardens at the B&B. She found a bench drenched in sunlight with flowers planted on three sides. Banana trees waved their broad leaves again in the morning breeze. A carpet of lush green surrounding her, prompted her to slip her feet from the sandals she wore and feel her toes wiggle in the cool grass, tickling her with delight. I could get used to this, she thought.
Last night still hummed in her chest. They had not kissed—not yet. A parting embrace had their foreheads touching, breathing nose to nose, feeling the growing warmth each one already held for the other. Kamea’s hands held the curve of her waist, hers around Kamea’s neck. That was as far as it went, standing next to the rental car, saying their goodbyes in the half-light of evening.
She remembered the hush of their breath, her heart beating in her ears, and the only witnesses; the stars that hung above, and the lapping of waves against a sandy shoreline.
Now, in the full light of morning, Rebecca was swimming in feelings she hadn’t experienced in a long time.
Kamea would be working at the coffee shop in Paia today. Rebecca almost went there for her morning coffee, then thought better of it. Too soon. Instead, she went to the General Store at the bottom of the hill.
She stayed only long enough to buy coffee and some sticky buns and cart them back up to her room, in case she ran into Laura again. Hadn’t she invited her up to Makawao today? To the farm? Hers was a path she didn’t want to cross again anytime soon. Not yet.
She didn’t know what was going to happen with Kamea of course, but she didn’t want what little illusions and fantasies she courted, tainted with possible half-truths and warnings from a jilted ex. If there was anything to explain further, Kamea would tell her in time. But something about Laura didn’t feel right—not that she was bad, just—well—Rebecca couldn’t quite put her finger on it.
Rebecca couldn’t imagine Kamea as being anything other than a genuine, caring soul. Her manner—what little she had seen of it, at least, was one of genuine warmth and tenderness. Nothing about her made Rebecca imagine she could be insincere. Kamea seemed almost as confused by this entire attraction thing as she was.
And what of Auntie’s visions? What did she mean about a rainbow, and that it would answer the questions she held? Before coming here, Rebecca didn’t feel as though she had any questions to ask at all. She had resigned herself to mourning a lost love and focusing on her work. But she lamented it having made her stiff, reserved, and somewhat of a recluse as well.
But before now—before this—Rebecca felt she didn’t have any questions, or anything she longed to understand anymore. She just thought someday she would get over her breakup and move on. She hadn’t considered how that might actually feel though; how it might happen for her.
She had become comfortable, keeping her head down, working her life away. Now the doors of her comfort zone had
been torn away, and she didn’t know what to make of it. Maui. Why did I come to Maui?
Now, though, there were all sorts of questions. She swam in questions above a seabed of feelings. Feelings that had been lying dormant only to have them rise in the light of this place, this magical land of Maui. It was as though the island had a life and a Spirit of its own and it would not see her rest on her past. Auntie most likely understood this and saw this for her.
She turned her face to the mid-morning sun, her eyes closed, absorbing its warmth. In a half dream, she saw Kamea’s face once again, her liquid brown eyes expressing only tenderness, her lips in a gentle smile.
Those lips. She felt as though she knew Kamea’s kiss already—the taste and feel of her lips pressed against hers, her warm breath across her cheek. How could she know this? It was as though dreams had carried the kiss on beams of morning light, to brush against her face and then her lips with its tenderness.
* * *
Rebecca let herself bask in the daydream for a short while, and then her thoughts turned to plans for the day ahead. Kamea had suggested if she wanted to—no pressure of course—that Rebecca come over for dinner. She’d be working till about two, then take care of a few errands before heading home.
“Maybe you could come by for dinner, watch a movie? JonJon has quite a DVD collection too,” she had said, “And he and Brenda will be there, so it’ll be easy just to hang out and have a laugh,” she explained further.
“That would be nice,” she had responded. And it did sound nice. It was an ordinary non-vacation thing to do, and a no-pressure date too—just hang out at a new friend’s home, doing what people do all the time. No romantic pressure would be perfect, she thought. She would pick up some more of that beer they enjoyed last night on the way too, and maybe something for everyone to snack on during the movie.