And my mother explained to me that going to the hospital is like me running. Running can be good or not so good. It's good when I run in races and win medals. But bad (my mom says not so good, which just means bad) when I run away from someone when I'm not supposed to.
So, my mom said I could go to the hospital for something good, just like I'd run for a medal. I had gone to see Sam and it was bad but going to see a new baby was good.
We picked up Declan from his job at Best Buy and we drove with my mom and dad. When we got there, I walked in with my dad. He told me I couldn't run in the halls, and he held onto my hand. Like, held it tightly.
"I won't run. Sam told me there's a time to run and a time not to run."
"Smart boy," said my dad. He let go of my hand.
When we got to Mary's room there were all kinds of blue balloons, like there was a party going on. Who would have thought going to the hospital was like going to a party? The baby was in a little bin-like thing beside her bed.
I stared down at Nathan, and I couldn't believe how small he was. Then I sat in a chair and my mother put baby Nathan in my arms. Again, I looked down at him only this time he was close to me.
He had his eyes closed. He had the tiniest hands I'd ever seen, and a tiny nose and mouth too. He yawned and stretched and I laughed. I thought he looked more like Mary than Owen. He had black hair and skin that looked like Mary's and not red hair or white skin like Owen's. But I couldn't see his eyes so I didn't know what colour they were. Maybe they were green like Owen's.
"Was I ever this small?" I asked.
"You were," said my mother.
I still stared at him. I couldn't imagine being this little. "Did I learn differently when I was just born? Like this?"
"You did. But you're who you are now, and that's special. Just like this little nugget." She stroked the baby's cheek.
Just then he opened his eyes. Were they green? They were!
"Hi," I said. "I'm your Uncle Stuart."
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I am always so appreciative of those who help me when I'm writing a book. Stuart was created because kind people took the time to talk to me about FASD, read my manuscript in its rough form, and offer advice. Thank you to Stacey Wakabayashi, for all of our back and forth emails, for answering my questions (and there were lots), for reading, and for all the resources you provided to me. Stacey Wakabayashi is a Senior Teacher Consultant for the Provincial Outreach Program for FASD in British Columbia. If you are a teacher reading this book please visit www.fasdoutreach.ca for more information on these beautiful children.
Speaking of teachers…I'd like to thank Michael Rossi and Caitlin Mann for their long conversations about the behaviours of children with FASD, especially with the track meet information; Katja Rossi for introducing me to Mr. Wakabayashi; David Rossi for his insight; and Lois Rossi for always reading my books. Yes, "Mr. Rossi," the track coach in the novel is named after the Rossi boys, including Ector Rossi.
Thank you to Jacqueline Popplestone for our long telephone conversations about being the mother of two girls with FASD. Jacqueline does not let FASD define her girls and is always championing the ABILITY within the word DISABILITY. Jacqueline, you are amazing. The world needs more people like you. And thanks to my fabulous author friend, Janet Gurtler, for introducing me to Jacqueline.
Another fabulous author friend, Debby Waldman, introduced me to Dr. Lori West (Lori J. West, MD, DPhil, FRCPC; Canada Research Chair in Cardiac Transplantation; Director, Canadian National Transplant Research Program; Fellow, Canadian Academy of Health Sciences; Professor of Pediatrics, Surgery, Immunology and Pathology/Lab Medicine; Director, Alberta Transplant Institute University of Alberta). As you can see from the list following her name, she was invaluable with her knowledge about Sam's heart condition. Even with her busy schedule, Lori answered my questions and read the parts about Sam.
Thank you to Elma Begovic, far all the Bosnian information and for sharing your story about being in a refugee camp in Germany. I named Sam's sister after you!
As for the many organizations I googled, the books I read, and the lectures I attended, thanks to all the writers, speakers and professionals.
And as always, thank you to Clockwise Press for allowing me to write this series and for being so supportive with each and every book. Christie, you are a brilliant editor. Thank you.
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