by Vivian Wood
“You have to tell me, I’m dying over here,” Penny said. “Can I turn around? Or—”
The excitement in Penny’s eyes was unmistakable. She'd known Sarah and Ryan would be here. Poppy didn’t know how, but somehow Penny knew. That realization broke the spell cast over her.
“I don’t know what game you’re playing,” Poppy said as she stood up with determination. “But I think it’s cruel. Childish, and cruel.”
“What are you talking about?” Penny asked with a sniff. “You’re acting crazy.”
“Apps are here,” announced the cheery waitress as she arrived and slid the hot platter onto the table.
“She’s paying,” Poppy said. Penny’s mouth dropped open.
“Seriously, you’re going to ditch me here with the bill and a bunch of food that you ordered?” Penny asked. The waitress’ eyes widened and she scuttled away.
“Yep,” Poppy said. She turned on her heels and made a beeline for the door.
“You’re a fucking bitch, you know that, right?” Penny called after her, but she didn’t care.
In her car, she struggled to keep the tears at bay. She didn’t know if it was seeing Ryan and Sarah or what. Maybe it was Penny. But none of them really owed her anything, so she didn’t know why she was so emotional.
Ryan was just moving on like she told him to. Sarah was just being herself. And Penny—well, she was always strange.
“What’s wrong with you?” she asked her reflection. Some of the tears had escaped down her cheeks and took what was left of her mascara with them.
Maybe Penny was sort of right. Maybe she was acting crazy. What did it matter to her if Ryan got a handjob in a restaurant? She shouldn’t care if Sarah gave him a blowjob or just rode him wild in plain sight.
Maybe she'd imagined the whole Penny thing, too. Sure, she could have known that Ryan and Sarah were at the restaurant. Maybe they'd checked in there or something. But there was no way she could have known they’d be going at it like rabbits.
As Poppy angled toward home, tears stayed on the brim of her eyelids.
When Will gets back, it will be okay. It will all be okay. Everything will go back to normal.
21
Ryan
“So? What do you think?” Li asked Ryan as they finished processing an Aston Martin Vulcan.
“Can’t complain,” Ryan said. “I was never really into cars, but I have to admit these things are incredible.”
“Sweeter than Mia Khalifa’s ass, wouldn’t you say?” Li winked at him.
“I have no idea who that is.”
“You’re a better man than me then.”
“But honestly Li, thanks for vouching for me. And you know, for hooking it up so I could train with you.”
“Not a problem, man,” Li said. “I’d take you over some of these jackasses that come through here any day.”
Right as Ryan headed to the parking lot, he got a text from Mason. Want to tube the Shenandoah tomorrow? Ryan smiled. He couldn’t remember the last time he'd hit the river.
Sure, time? he replied.
Early, 8, get a good spot.
Cool.
U got any friends to invite? Ryan knew what Mason wanted, but those days were over. The only women in his life weren’t Mason’s style.
Still, he shot a text to Sarah, who agreed right away. He knew she would, since she was good like that. Up for anything. Isn’t that what every guy wants? A cool girl who can hang with the guys?
His thumb hovered over Poppy’s number. Why not? He texted her the invite, but knew she wouldn’t answer. She’d been acting strange again, even though he thought the movie and pizza night—awkward as it had ended up being—had fixed things. He decided to call her as well, but she didn't pick up either.
“Poppy,” he said to her voicemail. “Either call me back, or you’ll find me on your steps again.” That threat didn’t work out as planned. It took him over an hour in rush hour traffic to get back to the neighborhood from his US Marshal post, and by then he was frustrated. Instead of taking his usual turn at the supermercado on the corner, he turned left toward Poppy’s place.
By some stroke of incredible luck, her car was parked out front.
“Open up!” Ryan called as he rang the doorbell. He tried to make his voice sound light and joking, but there was a seriousness to it below the surface.
Will opened the door, his mouth set in a hard straight line.
Ryan blinked. “Will. Sorry, man. I thought Poppy—I didn’t know you were back.”
Will looked at him strangely. “And you’re upset that I’m the one who answered the door?”
“No, man, no. You just surprised me is all.”
“Okay. So what’s up?” Will leaned against the doorframe and held the door with one hand. It was clear Ryan wasn’t welcome inside.
“Who is it?” He heard Poppy’s voice from the bedroom. She bounded toward the door. “Ryan!” She was stunning, wearing a fitted baby blue dress with a sheer overlay that nipped in at the waist before it blossomed out into a full, knee-length skirt. Poppy looked like a perfectly coiffed housewife from the fifties, but sexier. Hotter. The red lipstick and upswept hair didn’t hurt, either.
But it was strange. Shouldn’t they both be tumbled in bed together? Will must have just got back. They haven’t fooled around at all? The idea that all was proper and stoic between them made his heart jump—even though he had no way of knowing what was really going on between them.
“Hey, Pops.” Will raised a smug eyebrow at the pet name. “You weren’t answering your phone. So…”
Poppy wrinkled her nose. “I’ve been busy,” she said. “As you can see.”
“Yeah, I didn’t know.”
“I’m surprised Pops didn’t tell you I was coming back this morning,” Will said. “I thought you two talked about everything. Being besties and all.”
“Will,” Poppy said.
“I’m serious! Maybe Ryan could have helped you bake me a welcome home cake or something.” The feeble attempt to emasculate Ryan didn’t work, but it was more covert than Will’s usual approach.
“Good idea. I do love cake, man,” Ryan said.
“Will’s schedule was bumped around a lot,” Poppy said. She directed her words to Ryan, but it sounded like excuses for Will. “I didn’t know for sure when he was coming back ‘til recently.”
“Surprise!” Will said as he raised both brows.
“Yeah. Surprise,” Ryan said. “So, how’d it go? Los Angeles, I mean.”
“Good, real good,” Will said. “A lot of networking, made a lot of connections, so it was a good trip.” Ryan could see that California had indeed treated Will kindly. He had a hint of a tan and his hair had lightened a touch.
“Awesome, man. GFY.”
“GFY?” Will asked, his head cocked.
Go fuck yourself. “Good for you,” Ryan said slowly.
“Ah, good for you. You kids and your textspeak,” Will said. He was only a year younger than both Poppy and Ryan.
“Will got some amazing stuff done,” Poppy said, desperate to fill the awkward silence. “He met with, who was it? Diablo something—”
“Diablo Cody,” Will said, and rolled his eyes at Ryan. “I swear, I don’t know how she’s a doctor, she can’t remember a thing. And I didn’t meet with her, Poppy, it was a panel discussion. A small, private affair and only a few of us were invited, but still.”
“Right,” Poppy said.
“Diablo Cody, no shit,” Ryan said. Poppy shot him a look.
“So. Ryan. What brings you barreling to the door?” Will asked.
“Oh! I just wanted to see… Mason’s putting together a tubing thing tomorrow morning. Did you want to come?” He looked at Will. “Both of you, I mean.”
“Oh. I don’t know—” Poppy began.
“Why not, Pops?” Will interjected. “It’s one of the first times you’ve had a weekend off in a long time. Why shouldn’t we go?”
She gave Wil
l a curious look. “You want to? I mean, I guess…”
“Great,” Will said. “Then it’s settled. You know what? Let’s invite Penny, too. That way it won’t be just a bunch of guys.”
“Sarah is coming, too—”
“Even better!” Will said. “I’ll message Penny and see if she’s free. Maybe we can pick her up?” It sounded like a question, but Ryan and Poppy both knew it wasn’t. Will walked away from the door and pulled his phone from his pocket.
A shadow fell over Poppy’s face, but she didn’t say anything.
“Are you cool with that? With all this… Penny coming and everything…”
“She’s fine. Right, Poppy?” Will asked from the couch. “Besides, I already messaged her and she’s in.”
“Yeah,” Poppy said. “Sure. It’s fine.”
“Come now, Poppy,” Will pretended to chide her. “You can’t have all the men to yourself.”
Poppy blushed.
“Damn, this is a work call. I need to take this,” Will said as his phone rang. He went into the bedroom and closed the door.
“Are you really okay?” Ryan said quietly to Poppy. He searched her eyes for a hint of what was wrong. He knew she and Penny had their ups and downs, and it would certainly be strange—to say the least—to see Will tubing. But Poppy had seemed more upset at the idea of Penny coming than Will.
She looked back at the bedroom door. “Of course,” she said. When she turned back to him, a smile was stretched across her face. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Before he could respond, she shut the door in his face.
What the hell is wrong with her? With both of them? They were both acting weird—even by Will’s standards.
As Ryan slipped into his car, a Snapchat from Sarah came through. Thoughts? she asked, and attached an image of her in a skimpy bikini. He had to smile. This better? she asked as another photo came through. She pretended her bikini top had fallen off and she covered her bare breasts with a mock look of surprise on her face.
Careful, he replied. Tubing is serious business. Don’t want to give the guys more adrenaline than they’ll already have.
Then this one’s just for you, she replied. There wasn’t a trace of a swimsuit left in this one.
Ryan laughed as he drove home. Sarah had a way of lightening everything up, but the interaction with Poppy and Will still nagged at him. What was going on with those two?
When he got home, Sarah’s Snapchat messages had already disappeared. She pretended like she used the app just because it was fun and trendy, but he suspected she was savvier than she acted. Sarah protected herself, but in a quiet way few noticed.
Hey, he texted her. Send nudes. He smiled at their inside joke. When she’d told him “send nudes” was a popular opening line on dating apps, he hadn’t believed her. She'd had to show him old messages from her Tinder account.
She replied right away, but on Snapchat.
Text it to me, he said. He could have easily screenshotted it, but had learned quickly after Sarah installed the app on his phone that doing so notified the other person. Besides, it was just creepy.
Naughty boy! she replied. But there was no follow-up photo. They were both silent, a standoff. Wouldn’t you prefer the real thing? she finally asked. She wasn’t very patient. He always won these little games.
Always, he replied.
Want me to come... she asked. She waited a moment before following up with, over?
Ryan looked at the clock. It was getting late, and as much as the idea of a warm body sounded tempting, something stopped him.
You’ll wear me out for tubing tomorrow, he said. Need my beauty sleep.
I’ll skip mine if you skip yours.
You don’t need it, he said with a winky face, although he hated emoticons. Pick you up at 7:30 tomorrow.
Ugh, fine, you’re killing me, she said.
In just a few hours, he was going to witness the most bizarre tubing outing that ever existed. He was sure of it.
22
Poppy
She stood by the river bank and clutched one of the extra tubes Mason had brought. Even this early in the morning, beneath the vanilla sky, the river was swamped with people. All of them, the motley crew she was with included, laughed and splashed as they sailed onto the dark blue waters in their tubes and cheap rafts. A few yards downriver, she watched a gaggle of teenage girls as they launched inflatable unicorns and pizza slices onto the waters.
Murder, she thought. They should call groups of teenage girls a murder, like crows.
The morning drive had been tense to say the least. Mason had reserved nearby cabins. It was clear he expected a weekend-long party. Will had complained when the WhatsApp group text decided on busing it from a rural town instead of taking cars up the winding roads. You’d need a 4WD in some spots, Mason had messaged.
Still, she had expected Will to complain more than he did. Instead, the lot of them were dropped off at the Shady Pines cabins, walkable to the river’s edge.
At the cabins, they shuffled around and dragged their bags full of river gear from room to room. Finally, it was decided—Will and her would share a cabin with Penny and another couple Mason knew from college. With just two bedrooms, one featured a bunkbed and the other a queen-size bed. The couple they bunked up with claimed the private room. Will, Penny and her would share the bunk.
“I should at least get to be on top,” Penny said. Neither her nor Will argued.
Poppy changed in the cramped cabin bathroom. As she pulled on her monokini, she listened to Will and Penny as they chatted away. Throughout the morning drive, she’d kept an eye on Ryan and Sarah, too. They seemed like a natural couple as they joked and teased one another. But Poppy had barely said a word to anyone.
“Poppy! Come on!” Will called to her from the river, his tube attached to the floating raft that carried coolers of beer. Slowly she lowered herself, flanked in striped rubber tubing, into the cold water.
She was behind everyone by a few feet. Why do I feel like the fifth wheel in all this?
As she brought up the rear, she watched the couples unfold before her. They seemed comfortable alongside the hodgepodge group of bachelors, led by Mason. Will said something to Penny that made her shriek with laughter. Poppy was surprised to find she didn’t feel a smidge of jealousy. Why aren’t they together?
That was a strange thought, but it made sense. They liked each other's company, Penny was quick to dote on Will and feed his ego, and as for Will he seemed to actually like Penny. And Will didn’t like anyone. They looked in sync, and made Poppy feel like the intruder. Had it always felt like this?
She floated lazily behind the group. The morning sun started to heat up, warming her skin. Maybe she wasn’t the only one stuck at a fork in the road. Down one path might be Will and Penny, and the other was Ryan and Sarah. But what about me? She couldn’t sit at this impasse forever. She felt stuck, unable to move. The paralysis made her uncomfortable.
The water lulled her into a light sleep, the kind where she was half awake but her body felt too heavy to move. With the sun streamed across her face and the contrast of the cool water on half her body, she let nature have its way with her.
Behind her trailed soft murmurs and giggles. Poppy forced her eyes open and saw that Ryan and Sarah were somehow behind her now. Their fingers were lightly intertwined to keep their tubes together. A bolt of jealousy shot through her. What do you have to be jealous about?
“Poppy! Hey,” Ryan called. He saw that she had looked back at them. “Come this way.”
Sarah smiled at her and released Ryan’s hand. Poppy dutifully started paddling toward Ryan as Sarah made her way to Mason’s group with the coolers. “Beer?” she called to Poppy, but Poppy shook her head.
“Hi,” Ryan said as her tube bumped into his.
She smiled, but didn’t say anything.
“Seriously?” he asked.
“What? I’m here.”
“Yeah. Here and being
a pain in the ass.”
“Yeah, well. You don’t need me to have a good time. You have Sarah.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he said, and tied the strings of his tube to hers.
Why wouldn’t he just take her hand like he did Sarah’s? She knew how melodramatic she acted, but she couldn’t help it. It’s like everyone’s ganging up on me these days—even you.
“Ry!” Sarah called from the floating bar. “Come here a sec.” Ryan gave Poppy an annoyed look, untied their rafts and started toward Sarah.
Fine. Let him go. Poppy melted into her pout the rest of the way down the river. By noon, the water started to get fiercer with traces of baby rapids. Poppy knew how to navigate choppy waters thanks to an entire childhood of escaping to the river. However, Sarah started to panic.
“Sarah, stop!” Ryan yelled at her. “You need to stay calm.” When Sarah started to get dangerously shaky, Ryan slid out of his tube to steady her. In seconds, his tube was lost down the river and he latched onto Sarah’s tube.
“Ryan! You’re going to flip us both—”
He let go and was instantly pulled under the water. She couldn’t bring herself to move.
En masse, a group of the guys dove into the water after him. Just Penny, Will, Sarah and Poppy remained on their tubes. They locked eyes with one another and continued to float.
Around the bend in the river was a tiny rocky beach. There was no need to speak. The four of them started to paddle like mad toward the shore. By the time they’d all dragged their tubes behind a piece of driftwood on the beach, the guys had followed with Ryan in their arms.
He was limp. Poppy could tell he wasn’t breathing.
In the distance, she could hear Sarah’s screams, but Poppy was on autopilot. She pushed through the guys and heard someone say, “I’m a doctor, I’m a doctor,” over and over. It didn’t register that it was her.