Withholding Nothing

by Victoria Bright

  And I didn’t disagree with him.

  This man resurrected things within me that I thought I’d lost when Steve and I split. He made me feel sexy, a blush touching my cheeks as I remembered his heated gaze when he saw me in my lingerie last night. His passionate strokes, kisses, and tender words as he thrust inside me made my heart flutter in my chest. The fact that he’d chipped away a few of my barriers in the short amount of time he’d been here was daunting. I’d been able to stay out of the dating pool since my break-up, but something about him made me want to reconsider.

  But I knew better.

  There was no need to confess feelings for a man who wanted to play the field. I was still getting over my current heartbreak; I didn’t want to complicate things further with another one.

  After putting my dishes in the dishwasher, I made my way to the bathroom and turned on the shower, letting the water pelt down on my skin. The hot spray felt good on my sore muscles. More images of O’Shea and I in the shower played through my mind, causing heat to pool between my legs.

  I closed my eyes and leaned against the shower wall, stroking my clit and caressing my nipple as I thought of his tongue lapping at my juices, the showerhead spraying us both. My groan echoed off the shower walls as I slipped two fingers into my core, imagining his hard cock pumping into me while pinning me to the wall. The memory of his strong, toned muscles flexing beneath my hands as he moved within me sent a wave of desire surging through my body.

  “O’Shea,” I whispered, moving my fingers quicker as my legs began to quiver. I gripped the shower railing, bracing myself for yet another orgasm as the tingling took over my body. It wasn’t as intense as it was when he caused it, but it would have to do. “O’Shea!

  His name echoed off the shower tiles as I repeated it over and over in a whimper. A sudden bang on my front door startled me, nearly causing me to slip and fall in the tub. A wicked grin crossed my face. Ditching work because you can’t wait, huh, I pondered, turning the shower off and wrapping myself in a towel. I stepped out and walked to the door, not bothering to fully wrap myself in the towel. It wasn’t the mail because it was far too early for them to be here and I wasn’t expecting anyone else. Even my parents didn’t come out this early. I unlocked the door and yanked it open.

  “Couldn’t get en—OH MY GOD!” I shrieked, scrambling to cover my naked body. Ava and Alex screamed and covered their eyes.

  “Jesus, Ashton! What the hell?” Ava protested.

  Alex laughed and waved her hand at me. “I know I like to joke around and proclaim my lesbian love for you, but this is a bit much,” she said.

  “Wait here and let me put on something,” I said, slamming the door shut. Shit. This man was already knocking me off my game. I cursed him and myself under my breath as I hurried into my bedroom and pulled on shorts and a tank top. After gathering my wits and calming my racing heart, I went back to the front door and opened it.

  “I’m really sorry about that, guys. I…I don’t know what I was thinking,” I said, palming my forehead.

  “You thought your sexy roommate was coming back,” Alex teased. My eyes widened.

  “What makes you think that?”

  “We passed him on the way here,” Ava stated matter-of-factly. I shifted in my seat, shrugging while refusing to meet eye contact.

  “Well, yeah. He lives here.”

  “Oh, cut the bullshit, Ashton. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to put two and two together,” Alex said with a wave of her hand. “So how was it?” Alex bounced in her seat as she awaited my answer. It was hard to stop the blush that rose to my cheeks as I thought about the events of last night and this morning.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said nonchalantly.

  “Well, something happened last night. You don’t usually answer the door damn near naked,” Ava said, in which Alex responded with an agreeing nod.

  “We just had dinner and talked and stuff.”

  “Right. So was he a good lay or what? Did you scream as loud as the lady that came over the first night?”

  I diverted my eyes away from them and pulled my legs up to my chest. “Why are you guys here, anyhow?”

  “Just wanted to make sure you were okay since we haven’t heard from you,” Ava said. I rolled my eyes and narrowed them at Alex.

  “I’ve just been busy lately with work and everything.”

  “Or busy lying to your friends and keeping secrets,” Ava stated.

  I released an audible sigh and threw my hands up in the air.

  “Okay, fine. We had sex and it was amazing. Are you happy?” I exasperated. Alex squealed with glee and jumped up to hug me.

  “I’m so proud of you! Don’t you feel so much better now?” she giggled.

  I tilted my head from side to side. “Maybe,” I drawl with a giggle.

  I spent the next few minutes telling them about the arcade and dinner afterwards, leaving out the information about the bet and everything else in between. Alex pressed me to go on about our intimate time together, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to tell them without blushing or becoming aroused again.

  “Sounds like one hell of a night,” she said, resting her annoying questions.

  I nodded. “It definitely was.”

  “What happens now?” Ava asked. I pinched the bridge of my nose. That was still a question I was trying to figure out the answer to.

  “I can’t tell you right now. He’s fun to be with, but we’re not looking for anything—”

  “It’s okay to feel things, Ashton. You’re a human with emotions,” Alex interrupted.

  “I know, but I don’t want to rush into things. I just want to be sure this is what I want.”

  “How will you know if you don’t take a chance and just go for it?” Ava countered. I looked between the both of my friends with a frown. Because he already said he wasn’t looking for anything.

  I sighed and gave them a small smile. “I understand your concern, but this is something I have to figure out on my own. I can’t expect you guys to understand, but this is big for me. I just need you to support me and be patient,” I said. They looked at each other and shrugged.

  “It’s your life, babe. You have to do what’s best for you,” Ava said with a smile.

  “What’s going on with you two?” I asked, trying to take the focus off my situation. Alex stretched across the couch, placing her legs across Ava’s lap.

  “Do I look invisible to you?” she complained.

  “I knew you weren’t going to move, so I improvised,” Alex responded with a nonchalant wave of her hand and turned her attention back to me. “Anyway, I have some news.”

  “What is it?”

  “I’m dating someone exclusively,” she said, puffing her chest out a little. I gasped, my hands flying to my mouth.

  “You’re lying. Who is it?” I squealed. “Alex” and “commitment” never went in the same sentence together. Whoever had the balls to tame that wild beast of a woman had to be a good one. “Well? Tell me! Who is it?”

  “If I tell you, you won’t believe me.”

  “Try us,” Ava said, curiosity shining in her eyes. Alex laughed nervously and cleared her throat, meeting our impatient gazes.

  “Jared,” she mumbled, cringing as she waited for our reactions. Ava’s face wrinkled as she stuck out her tongue.

  “Ew! My brother Jared?” she exclaimed, slapping Alex’s leg.

  “Ow! Yes, your brother. And man, does he have a huge—”

  “Oh my God, shut up!” Ava shouted, covering her ears with her hands. I burst out into a hearty laugh, slapping the arm of my chair.

  “It’s not that funny, Ashton,” Ava snapped, folding her arms across her chest and turned back to Alex. “How long has this been going on?”

  “Why are you so upset? You don’t want your best friend fucking your brother?” she asked, pretending to pout. Ava frowned.

  “What if you guys break up? Then what?”

 
“Then we just break up. We’re sisters for life; chicks before dicks, remember?”

  The phrase made me laugh again, making them both look at me. “Goodness, did your rendezvous leave you with the case of the giggles?” Alex asked.

  I shook my head and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. “It’s hilarious that you and Jared ended up together. Him of all people? You hated him in high school.”

  “You hated the mechanic, but look at you now,” she retorted with a smirk. I glared at her.

  “Yeah, yeah. But I mean Jared used to harass you all the time when we were younger and now you’re dating?”

  “He obviously liked me back then. Either way, time can mature people.”

  “He’s not mature. He’s—ugh!” Ava grunted, glaring at Alex.

  “You’re his sister, so of course you’d think that. He seems mature to me.”

  “How did you two end up together?” I asked. Jared was always an asshole to us, finding some way to embarrass us when we were younger. It wasn’t too surprising that he ended up with Alex. His friends used to tease him for liking her, but he always denied it, resorting to teasing her instead.

  “I was grocery shopping and he was getting pizzas or something. He came up to me on the aisle and started talking to me before finally asking if I wanted to go out and catch a movie or a drink at the bar. We settled for going to the movies and set up a few dates after that. The rest was pretty much history,” she said, staring into space with a dreamy expression.

  “I don’t want to hear anything about your relationship with him. I’m not getting in the middle of that stuff,” Ava said.

  “I won’t say a thing,” Alex said, swinging her legs down and sitting up. “Well, I have some errands to run, so we should get out of here.” They both got up to leave, hugging me on their way to the door.

  “Oh yeah, you should come with us to Mickey’s tonight. I’m sure you’re tired of being in the house,” Ava said.

  “That actually sounds good.”

  “Bring your sexy roommate with you,” Alex teased. I smirked at her.

  “I’ll pass the invitation along to him if he wants to come.”

  “Good. If he doesn’t want to come, text me and I’ll come get you. See you later, sweet cheeks!” Ava called as she walked out. I waved goodbye and closed the door, locking it behind them. My phone sounded with a text message alert. I opened the message and swallowed hard at what it said.

  O: Haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.

  I smiled to myself. At least the thoughts were mutual. I sent back a quick reply.

  A: Jesus, so obsessed with me.

  “Seen” displayed under my message and then the typing bubble came up.

  O: You damn right I am.

  A soft smile touched my lips as butterflies settled in my stomach. Or maybe he’s just joking with me? Dread quickly replaced my giddiness. Now I was confused again. I didn’t know how to feel about this man or how he felt about me. Of course guys said things all the time to get what they wanted from women, but he seemed different.

  I opened Alex’s text thread and sent her a message.

  Ash: Hypothetically speaking, what if I continued this thing with O’Shea and end up falling in love with him?

  I bit the inside of my cheek. Not that I planned to fall in love with him anytime soon. I didn’t plan on sleeping with him anytime soon, but fate had other plans. She wasted no time replying.

  Alex: What would be so bad about falling in love with him? You’re not still hung up on Steve are you?

  Ash: No. I mean I don’t think either of us are ready for this kind of thing.

  Alex: YOU’RE not ready, you mean?

  Ash: No. He even said that he wasn’t looking for a relationship right now and I just don’t want to set myself up for something I already knew in the beginning. I’m not the type of person who can do the whole friends with benefits things without involving my feelings.

  Alex: Well you never know. Time can change someone’s mind. Maybe you’re what the other is looking for.

  Despite her always joking around, she always gave me the advice that made sense. There was no telling what would happen in the future for me and O’Shea, but jumping the gun on an unknown situation wouldn’t help. For now, I’d continue this little situation I had going on with O’Shea. If I were being honest, it was fun, spontaneous, and exciting, but I needed to be careful.

  And do my best to keep emotions out of it.

  ∞∞∞

  I turned in the mirror for the fourth time, checking my outfit. The light blue halter dress I wore hugged my waist and flowed around my legs, stopping mid-thigh. The front door opened and closed, signaling that O’Shea was finally home from work. I teased my hair a bit with my hands and took a deep breath before leaving my bedroom. He stood in front of the front door, shifting through the mail as I walked toward him.

  “Sup?” he said, aware of my presence but not looking up.

  “Hey.”

  He glanced my way, doing a double take when he noticed my dress. “Damn,” he murmured. “Going somewhere?”

  Butterflies filled my stomach as I shyly tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. The way he looked at me made me warm all over, almost as if he only had eyes for me. “Going to Mickey’s with the girls. Kind of need to get out the house for a little bit.”

  His gaze traveled up and down my body, lingering longer on the swells of my breast before he met my eyes. “Sounds cool.”

  “Um…do you want to come with us? They wanted me to extend the invite,” I said.

  “Isn’t it supposed to be a girls night?”

  I shook my head. “Not necessarily. Alex specifically asked me to bring you,” I said with a playful grin. He chuckled.

  “I guess I can make an appearance. Do I have time to take a quick shower?”

  “As long as it’s not as long as the one you took the other day,” I teased. He smiled and shook his head.

  “It won’t be. Hang tight,” he said and headed toward his room.

  My phone vibrated, showing a text message from Ava.

  Ava: Hey! We’re about to leave. Need me to pick you up?

  I look toward the hallway, hearing the shower running. He can just meet us there. I made my way to the bathroom, knocking on the door.

  “Yeah?” he answered on the other side.

  “I’m going to catch a ride with Ava. Meet us there?” I called out.

  “Yeah, that’s cool,” he called back.

  Ash: Yeah, you can pick me up. He’s going to meet us there. He’s just getting home and is in the shower now.

  Ava: Cool. Be there in 5!

  No sooner than I read the text, my phone rung, displaying a picture of my mom and I on the screen.

  “Hey, Mom,” I said upon answering.

  “Hey, sweetie. How’s it going lately?” she asked. I walked back to the living room and sat on the couch.

  “Everything is pretty okay right now. I, um, have a roommate now.”

  “Oh really? One of your friends?”

  “No, its…” I hesitated. “It’s a guy I met—”

  “A guy you met? Met where? You’re dating him?”

  “No, Mom. He works at Rocky’s Repair Shop, you know, Ava’s uncle’s place?”

  “Oh good.” She breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m sure Rocky would’ve warned you if the guy was up to no good.”

  “Right. So right now everything is going good so far. He paid a couple of months in advance, so I was able to catch up on a few bills.”

  “That’s good, dear. What’s the situation with your car?”

  “My roommate is actually the one working on it. I’ll have to ask him about it,” I mused. Considering that O’Shea and I had been focused on other activities, my car repairs were at the back of my mind.

  “Did they give you an estimate on it?”

  I cringed slightly, fiddling with the fringe on the throw pillow next to me. “Like…$2,500 or so.”


  “Jesus, Ashton,” my mom fussed. “I talked with your dad about it and he says that you’re going to have to choose between us paying your car repairs or helping you with Steve. We don’t have the money to help you with both.”

  I sighed inwardly. “I understand, Mom. I can deal with Steve. If you guys could help with my car, I’d greatly appreciate it.”

  “Okay then. I’ll let your father know.” She was quiet for a moment. “So when do we get to meet this roommate of yours?”

  “I’ll have to ask him about his work schedule. He works a lot and everything,” I mentioned, just as I heard a horn outside. I crossed over to the window, seeing Ava’s Jeep in the parking lot. “Mom, can I call you later? Ava’s here and we’re supposed to be going out.”

  “Okay, sweetie. Oh, I was calling to see if you were coming to dinner this Sunday? It’s been a while since you’ve come over,” she said.

  “Uh, sure. That’s fine.”

  “And if your roommate isn’t busy, bring him along as well! We’d like to meet him,” she added.

  “Um,” I started, hearing the horn again. “I’ll ask him. Talk to you later, Mom.”

  “Okay, love you!”

  “Love you, too.” I hung up and dashed to my room, grabbing my purse from my bed. The shower still ran as I rushed past the bathroom and out the front door. My stilettos clicked against the sidewalk as I hurried to Ava’s Jeep, climbing into the backseat.

  “Look at you, sexy mama,” Alex exclaimed, turning to look at me. “Trying to impress your roommate boyfriend?”

  Even though I rolled my eyes, her words made me feel warm all over. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

  “Yeah, yeah.” She looked toward the apartment. “Is he not coming?”

  “He’s going to meet us there. He’s in the shower now,” I answered idly, typing him a quick text.

  Ash: Just left. See you when you get there.