I twirled into the kitchen to make breakfast, stopping just long enough to scoop my phone out of my hastily discarded purse. Humming lightly, I dialed Nina’s number.
“You’re up early,” she said sleepily.
“Time is irrelevant, we’re in heaven,” I sang as I cracked eggs into a bowl.
“What? Did the world end? Did I die and nobody told me? Damn it, I knew that was going to happen!”
“No,” I laughed as I whisked my breakfast up into a frothy dream. “Seriously, Nina? Do you really think like that?”
“Well what do you expect when you wake me up with news like ‘time is irrelevant’?” she grumped. Noises in the background told me that she was out of bed brewing coffee.
“I’m sorry,” I told her, but I couldn’t manage to make my tone match the words. “I couldn’t help it, if I don’t tell somebody soon I’m going to explode!”
“That time is irrelevant? I mean, it’s one of those key epiphanies and everything, but it could have waited until my law-of-human-constructs-abiding-ass had at least sucked down some stimulants.”
“That’s not the news,” I giggled, rolling my eyes at her excessive drama. “Nina, it happened. It actually, finally happened!”
“Girl, I swear to God, if you don’t stop being vague… Oh, hold on, coffee’s ready. Hold that thought.”
I finished up my eggs, waiting patiently for her to fix and guzzle half a cup of coffee.
“Okay, go,” she said a few moments later, far more cheerfully.
“Blake stayed the night last night,” I told her with a tremble of excitement in my voice. “And… It finally happened!”
“Oh! Oh my gosh! Are you…? I mean, are you good? Was it good? Was it awful? It’s always awful the first time, don’t worry about that, there’s plenty of time to—”
“It was wonderful,” I interrupted her.
“Really?” she asked eagerly.
“Honestly, Nina, I couldn’t have lost it to a better guy. He was so…thorough, so…just perfect, Nina, he’s perfect, I’m perfect, this whole morning is perfect and I love everything!”
“Damn. I should have been pickier about my first guy,” Nina said enviously. “But I guess you can never tell until it’s time to do the thing, and without a frame of reference, you can’t really judge how bad a thing is I guess… Ugh, I’m rambling nonsense, more coffee.”
I ate as I waited for her to drink enough coffee to shake the last remaining cobwebs out of her head.
“This is awesome,” Nina said finally. “I’m so happy for you! I couldn’t be happier, but I could be a lot less green… I’ll handle my envy later,” she laughed. “You must have a fairy godmother somewhere. First the promotion, now this… Oh! What are you going to do about the promotion? Are you thinking a long-distance thing, or…?”
The promotion. Reality returned with a dull thud, and I realized that I was going to have to choose.
“I can’t ask him to do long distance, not this soon after establishing an…us. I could lose him. I almost certainly would lose him, and…” I trailed off, struggling with the decision.
“Is he worth it?” Nina asked.
“He is,” I said defensively. “He really, really is, Nina. It’s not just the sex—I mean, that was amazing, I had no idea it could be like that—but it’s so much more than that. He feels right. We can talk for hours and never run out of things to say, he likes the stars as much as I do, he’s so humble about his billions he doesn’t even make me feel bad about my pitiful savings account, and I…I know it’s early, and this sounds insane, but…I can really picture a future with him, Nina.”
“Oh no,” she sighed. “I was afraid of this.”
“Of what?”
“Of you falling utterly, completely, and destructively in love with the person who graduates you,” she said bluntly.
“It’s not destructive,” I assured her quickly. “Really. I’m not picking out wedding dresses or anything, I know that there’s a chance it might not work out for one reason or another and I know that I’ll be okay if it doesn’t. I’m not pinning my happiness on him, but…”
“But?”
“He feels like home,” I confessed in a rush. “And I’ve been homesick for so long, Nina.”
“Aw! Okay, I can’t even be cynical about that. You know what to do, Rhona, and I won’t try to talk you out of it. I told you Matchmakr was the best!”
“You were right,” I agreed, perking up once more. “And he is also the best. I mean, even if, for some reason, he isn’t meant to be my forever…I’ll always have the best deflowering memory.”
“All right, my morbid curiosity has gotten the better of me,” Nina said resignedly. “Details, give!”
Laughing, I tucked my feet up under me and regaled Nina with the story, in exquisite detail.
By the time I hung up the phone, I was feeling better about my decision. I’d spent my whole life chasing a career; wasn’t it about time I chased something more meaningful?
Chapter 11
Rhona
Simply having made the decision didn’t make it any easier for me to decline the promotion, I found. On Monday morning, struggling with my fear of failure and guilt about disappointing someone, I typed out an email to my boss.
While I appreciate the offer immensely, and I acknowledge that it would be the best possible career choice, and I am elated by the offer, I cannot…
“Ugh. Babbling in circles.” I blew a stray strand of hair out of my face, erasing what I had written.
Restlessly, I picked up a pen and began drafting bits and pieces of my email on a notepad, scribbling out my most insecure-sounding phrases just to clear them from my mind. This was my decision, I reminded myself, and I had every right to make it. Steeling my confidence, I returned to the email.
Dear Sir,
I regret to inform you that I will not be accepting the offer of promotion to…
I stopped typing again as the phone blared out beside me. “Of course the phone’s gonna ring right now,” I mumbled as I picked it up to answer. “Rhona Campbell, how can I help you?”
“Rhona, it’s Patty.”
“Patty! Hi, how are you? How’s the new job working out? We’ve missed you around here!”
It was a gentle lie, but she was worth it. As a person, Patty was interesting, fun, and wildly spontaneous. As a marketing professional, she was the same; which sounds like a good thing on paper, but in reality my team had spent as much time trying to rein her in as we did on our actual jobs.
“I’m awesome, the job is awesome, and you! You’ve gotten all awesome on me without even letting me know! How could you, I’m hurt,” she said the words, but her tone was as flighty and casual as always, not to mention the fact that I had no idea what she was talking about.
“So, how does it feel?” she asked eagerly.
“Uh…how does what feel?”
“Having your face on billboards all over the city, silly! When did you get into modeling, anyway? I had no idea! I mean, obviously, if any of us could have been a model it would have been you—maybe Nina too, she’s nice and tall—but you actually did it. When did this even happen?”
“I… What? I don’t understand.” I was beginning to feel insane, and realized how I must have made Nina feel that weekend. I made a mental note to buy her something chocolate.
“Okay, okay, I know, I know, industry secrets and all that, but I promise I’m already on board. I do advertising for Mr. Lexington… Blake to you, I guess!” Patty giggled in a pitch high enough to rattle my eardrum. “Not all of his stuff, just his Matchmakr app. We just went live with the campaign, and it looks absolutely perfect. You’re such a good model with those poses and everything, I could have sworn that you were actually head over heels for him; you should have started modeling ages ago!”
“Wait, what campaign?” My head was spinning and my gut felt like lead as I began to stitch her rambling nonsense together.
“The Matchmakr campa
ign, of course! Matchmakr, destiny’s shortcut; Matchmakr, rekindling old flames—I really love the photo you guys did for that one, the colors in the restaurant and the way your dress just pops, it’s absolutely perfect. I hope they let you keep that dress, it’s fabulous.”
“The coral dress?” I asked weakly.
“Of course! The other one was fine too, but that coral dress man, that killed me dead when I saw it, I need one!”
“Yeah… It’s a good dress…” I felt like I was falling down an elevator shaft.
“Anyway, you sound busy so I’ll let you get back to being your fabulous self, I just wanted to congratulate you! And tell you how jealous I am that you got to pose with Blake. Isn’t he just the studliest? I’d give my left pinkie finger to get as close to him as you did!”
It would take more than your pinkie finger to get that close, I thought. “Yeah, it was fun,” I told her, strength returning to my voice on a wave of anger. “We’ll do lunch sometime, all right?”
“Sure thing, doll. All right, gotta go, kisses!”
Confusion, hurt, and anger swirled through me as I hung up the phone, leaving me frantic for answers. I googled Blake’s name again, and this time I didn’t skip the details. Opening the full article, I read every single word. There, near the bottom, was the phrase I was looking for in the hopes that I wouldn’t find it.
“…Inc. is the parent company of such household names as FarmCraft LLC, JobFindr, SpaceView, and MatchMakr.”
“You son of a…” My throat closed with emotion and I ground my teeth. I was trembling, my blood running cold with icy fury as I realized what must have happened.
Unable to resist, I searched for Matchmakr’s newest campaign. Fury blinded me in a rush of red when I saw the pictures. Me, six years ago, flirting with him in the photo booth. Me, from mere days ago, doing it all over again. How dare he. How dare he?!
“Hey, so my station’s low on toner, could you…? Oh, no. What happened?” Nina leaned over my cubicle wall, examining my face in concern.
“Coffee break,” I growled through my teeth.
Nina didn’t say a word as she followed me back to the breakroom.
“He lied to me,” I told her, my voice trembling as I grabbed the coffee pot. Hands shaking, I poured too quickly and splashed hot coffee all over my feet and the counter, which only served to infuriate me more. Nina swept in with paper towels, cleaning up the mess and herding me to a chair.
“You mean beyond failing to mention that he was a billionaire?” she asked.
“Do you know why he didn’t mention that?” I asked explosively.
“Well, no, to be honest, but I was going with the assumption that he was looking for love and didn’t want his money to cloud the issue.”
“No, that’s what a good person would do,” I said bitterly as I took my cup from her. “Blake didn’t tell me he was a billionaire because he didn’t want me to know that he owns Matchmakr!”
Nina sat down hard, her eyes wide. “He owns it?”
I nodded miserably, uncomfortable with the intensity of my own fury.
“Well… That doesn’t mean anything, not really. I mean, what if he designed the app because he was lonely? I mean, it’s kind of overkill, but it might be perfectly innocent, right?”
“I could have believed that if it wasn’t for…” Embarrassment set my teeth on edge and I gripped the cup hard enough to turn my knuckles white. “He used me. This whole thing was a sneaky way to get a unique ad campaign going for Matchmakr, and get his rocks off in the process. My face, all over the city, telling the world how he suckered me into promoting his business for free.”
I paced, trying to breathe against the ball of rage in my chest. “Those first pictures? Some of them were his, he had them already, but he had the other ones too. Do you know where those were?”
“Where?” she asked hesitantly.
“In a seventh-grade science book on the shelf of a dusty second-hand bookstore. And I told him this, because he asked, and I thought he was actually interested in me, actually wanted to make up for what he did, actually… God, I can’t believe him!”
“Oh, honey,” she gushed sympathetically, reaching a hand out to me. Nina’s pity only stoked my fury, and I held back tears as I pulled out my phone.
“What’s done is done,” I said through gritted teeth. “But I’m not going to keep playing his game.”
I pulled up the message thread between Blake and me, reading his messages through a new filter as I began to type. His sweet, funny words only compounded my outrage, and I didn’t hold back.
You can forget the trip this weekend. You can forget everything. Now that I’ve served my purpose, I’ll be taking a new job in Iceland. I hope you’re satisfied with yourself. No more second chances.
Nina, reading over my shoulder, gave me a shocked look tinged with respect. I took it as approval, and sent the message.
Rising to my feet, I drew power and confidence from my anger. Blake had just made my choice clear, and I wasn’t going to give myself time to talk me out of it.
“Where are you going?” Nina asked as I strode from the break room.
“To talk to the boss,” I told her. “It’s time to make a change.”
I barely knocked as I swept into Charlie’s office. He glanced up in surprise, and welcomed me with a smile.
“I wanted to tell you that I am officially accepting the promotion,” I said. “When do I leave?”
“We already have your apartment ready for you,” he told me with a sly grin. “I can get you on a plane tonight.”
“I’m ready,” I said recklessly.
“Excellent,” he said, shaking my hand. “Welcome to management, Ms. Campbell.”
Chapter 12
Blake
“No more second chances?” I read the text out loud as if that would change her meaning.
“Hey, man, you good?” Josh, my best friend and a terrible trust-fund bum, rose languidly to his elbow on the couch in my office, squinting at me through bloodshot, hungover eyes.
“She just blew me off! Completely! She’s taking a job in freaking Iceland!”
“Oh, she’s one of those,” Josh said disparagingly, flopping back onto the cushions. “Dodged a bullet there, my friend.”
“What?!” I snapped.
“Whoa, man, chill. I’m just saying, Iceland’s like the feminist center of the world. Not that I begrudge the ladies the vote or anything, but a girl seduced by feminism in this day and age is gonna be rebelling against everything you say just to assert her dominance or whatever.”
“You’re an idiot, Josh.”
He shrugged. “Whatever, man. I’m just saying, if it was going as good as you say it was and she’s doing what you’re saying she’s doing, then it’s already started.”
“She wouldn’t do that just for the sake of it,” I insisted.
“Really? Then why is she doing it?” Josh kept that practiced lazy tone in his voice, but his eyes were studying me sharply.
“I don’t know,” I admitted in frustration. “She seems pissed. ‘No more second chances,’ what does that mean? I didn’t stand her up, I didn’t wig out, I did everything right! Didn’t I?” I read the message again and again, searching for insight that wasn’t there.
“Hold on a second,” Josh said suddenly, sitting upright. “Dude, is this the virgin?”
“No,” I hedged. She technically wasn’t anymore, after all.
“My ass. She’s why you were poking around last week, searching up best and worst deflowering experiences, isn’t she?”
“How many times have I told you to stay off my laptop?”
“Whatever, man, your search history don’t lie. You nailed a virgin, and now she’s gone nuts. Man, I warned you about this exact thing years ago! Remember that girl you met at the observatory who you were so stuck on for a minute? Do you remember what I told you?”
“Yes, I remember,” I snapped. “You said that virgins go nuts and imprint
on you like baby ducks. You told me half a million horror stories about girls going full stalker after their first time. You got me so worked up that I didn’t even call her to cancel the date because I was afraid she would pull some Shakespearean drama, and it was the worst mistake I ever made.”
“You say that but look at what’s happening now. What is it with you and virgins anyway?”
“Not virgins in general,” I told him angrily. “Just her.”
“And the last one.”
“Same girl.”
“What?!”
I ground my teeth as Josh started pacing the room, shoving his hands through his messy hair. “Dude, are you insane? Of course she’s gonna pull something like this. Not only did you take her virginity, but she’s got all this revenge crazy built up from the first time around!”
“Which would never have been an issue if it wasn’t for you,” I pointed out. “So maybe shut up and let me figure this out myself.”
“Nah, man, just let it go. Leaving the country is the best thing she could do; you’re lucky she’s not burning her name into your buildings or something.”
I granted him a stunned look, giving him my full attention for a moment. “Dude. Have you ever even talked to a woman?”
“Yeah, man! The cuter they are, the crazier they are, and that goes double for virgins.”
“Maybe the girls you meet are crazy,” I countered, typing out a line of question marks in response to her text and pressing send. “But you go looking for crazy.”
“I do not.”
“Do too. Have you ever met a girl somewhere that didn’t have a bar, where people weren’t actively chasing oblivion, where there wasn’t music loud enough to drown out any coherent thought process?”
“Like what, church?” he scoffed.
“Middle ground, Josh, middle ground.”
I checked my phone, but Rhona hadn’t responded. I began typing actual words, but before I could finish the text, a call came through, interrupting me.
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