Daddy Dearest: A Christmas Story

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Daddy Dearest: A Christmas Story Page 18

by Rachel Burns


  He went to her without looking at her face and tucked the blankets in around her.

  “You shouldn’t be out of bed,” Morgan protested.

  “I wanted to get you the pictures of your mother. We’ll go visit her tomorrow. I think she’d like that.” Martin gently laid his hand on her shoulder for a moment. He felt so lucky to have her.

  “Okay. Umm … Sawyer had to go home. There was something that he needed to do.”

  “I understand. Sleep tight, honey.” He went to the window and closed the curtains, wishing that he could take her pain away.

  Softly, he closed the door as he left.

  Then he went down to his office and got out the files that he kept about the only two women of real importance in his life: Stephanie and Morgan. He needed a moment to catch his breath. Merely walking down the stairs had become a difficult task for him.

  He spent hours looking at both of their pictures, going through them over and over again.

  The servants brought him his meal at his desk so he wouldn’t have to stop looking at the pictures. He wondered if Stephanie would be waiting for him when he died. When he looked at the pictures of Morgan, he noticed that she had a spark in her eyes, and that her smiles were bigger before she came to live with him.

  That sparked dwindled with the years and became replaced with a rather fake-looking smile towards the end. But on her graduation day, the smile was back. He could almost taste the freedom she must have felt that day.

  But the spark had been gone again when he met up with her and Robert. He only had a couple of months to live. Would he be able to bring that spark back in that short amount of time?

  Exhausted, he put the pictures away in their file. But he didn’t return them to the cabinet, knowing that he would want to look at them again every day for the rest of his life.

  As he had so many times, he went into Morgan’s room to watch her sleep. She had grown into a beautiful woman, one who was lean and pretty. She wasn’t the sexy type like Stephanie had been, but she had attracted Mr. Dalton. He loved her. He just needed time to remind himself of that. With time, he’d come around.

  Martin went to bed, knowing that he had to use this chance that he was given to help his daughter get a better impression of him.

  ~

  Martin was puffing for air as he stood beside Morgan. They were both fixated on Stephanie’s grave. It was getting difficult for him to stay on his feet, but he knew that he couldn’t cut this moment short. Why had he never come here with Morgan before?

  The truth was that he had never thought to come. He never worried about how she was mourning her mother. He figured that she was too young to understand. Now he could see that she still needed a lot of time to recover from the loss of her mother.

  “I don’t know what to say to her,” Morgan whispered.

  “Neither do I,” he confessed. “I’m certain she’s just glad to see us.”

  “You’re making it sound as if she can look upwards and actually see us in spite of the dirt.” That thought spooked her.

  “No, darling. She’s looking down at us.” He laid his arm around her and gave her a hug. It was the first one he had ever given her.

  Martin was choking from the tightness in his lungs and from thinking about how he was going to miss her. He was so thankful that she had come home to him. He’d repay her generously for this. Morgan was going to be one of the richest women in the world.

  And he was certain that she wouldn’t give a shit about the money.

  Chapter 30

  Sawyer found himself trying to drive away from Morgan again. The last time he tried to do it, he hadn’t been able to do it. He’d gone back for her, and he’d been right to do it.

  When he thought about the life she’d led before him, he had pictured her dirt poor, being white trash that lived in a small house where the carpet was old, dirty and sticky. No one had ever taught her how to clean up. They’d lived in their junk.

  But the truth was that she didn’t know how to clean up because she was rich and had servants who cleaned up after her.

  It was ridiculous to think that they could be a couple. Oil and water didn’t mix.

  Morgan was a rich kid. Sawyer may not be a beggar, but he knew when he was out of his league.

  Only a handful of men were in her league. Men who were bound to own islands or become president. Men who had their own helicopter.

  Heck what was he thinking. Those guys didn’t have a chance with her either. The man who married her would need to have a jet to impress her. Her father was the richest man in the country. No one was good enough for her.

  A guy who owned a truck stop wasn’t up to snuff. That was for sure. Her father would tell her that too.

  It was starting to get dark, and because Sawyer was being plagued by his thoughts, he decided to pull into a motel and get his bearings.

  He checked into a room, thinking that this was money that he could have saved if he could have driven straight through to home, but his body was exhausted from driving here the past couple of days.

  Sawyer turned on the TV to try to get his thoughts somewhere else. He needed a distraction.

  It didn’t work. Nothing could stop him from thinking about Morgan.

  Giving up, he flicked off the TV and decided to take a shower and get ready for bed.

  Once he turned the light out, he realized how cold the room was. He wasn’t used to sleeping alone. The bed was too big, and some kids were partying in a nearby room.

  He lay in bed awake and mad that Morgan had never told him the truth about her past. She had misled him.

  A large part of him wanted to drive back to her and ask her why. He wanted to demand to understand what was going on in her messed-up head.

  Another part of him thought about her wanting to jump off of cliff. Who would do that if they were happy with their lives?

  Was she a poor little rich girl? Or was she his little angel who had spent over a year with him, obeying him and doing scenes with him?

  She had never asked for anything, let alone demanded anything. Had she gone without things that she normally would have had?

  Of course, she had. He wasn’t in a position to give her the life she was used to.

  But she had been the perfect slave. She took pain expertly. She responded to his every touch, never complaining.

  No, that wasn’t true. She was often cold with him.

  But then he remembered how upset she had gotten when the chain of her necklace broke. She thought that it was gone. It had been clear that she had never had anything like it before. It had meant a lot to her.

  The same could be said about her tips. Morgan never spent them. She liked having them, but not because she preferred to live off of him. She was never greedy when he took her shopping. Sawyer picked out her things, and Morgan never complained. In fact, she tried to slow him down. He had always hated that. It bugged him when she rejected the things he offered her. He hated her take-him-or-leave-him attitude.

  But in the end, he had been the strong one. He’d left her. He was the one who broke their ties. Secretly, he was proud of that. She didn’t know it, but he was the one dependent on her.

  He thought about her jar of tips. It was still at home. She hadn’t taken it with her. Should he see it as his? It could be the payment he got for her room and board.

  But on the other hand, she had worked for him for free. Maybe he should send it to her with a nasty note?

  He pictured her opening the package and seeing the money. The look on her face would be one of devastation, but she would quickly mask it and pretend she wasn’t hurt.

  She had looked that way when they parked in front of the grand house, the place where she had grown up. She hadn’t been happy to be home.

  Then Sawyer began to wonder if his own jealousy and feelings of insignificance were the problem. Morgan hadn’t told him that he wasn’t good enough for her. He had been the one who was haunted with those feelings.

 
When it was time for him to get up, he realized that he hadn’t slept yet. He got up and took another shower ready to face his day.

  He knew what he needed to do, but when he returned to his truck, he couldn’t do it. Her father was dying. She didn’t need any drama from him. He drove home instead.

  ~

  As soon as Sawyer parked, he had to answer questions about where Morgan was. Horace had been taking out the trash.

  “Morgan’s father is in a bad way. She’s going to stay with him for at least a couple months. That’s how long the doctors gave him.” That was the truth. He had only left out the fact that he had left Morgan, and that she would never be coming back home.

  “I’m sorry to hear that. We’ll include both of them in our prayers,” Horace assured him.

  Horace and his wife found comfort in religion. Morgan had been Sawyer’s comfort. Now that was gone too.

  Sawyer nodded at him and went inside to get back to his life. He needed to pick up so many pieces before he could move on.

  Chapter 31

  Morgan slowly walked into her father’s office with him beside her. Whenever anyone looked his way, he would force his body to straighten up. No one knew the truth yet.

  Martin began listing people that he wanted to see in his office, and his secretary jumped into action, picking up the phone right away.

  “Do you want something to drink, darling?” he asked her. He used the word darling so often that Morgan was starting to get used to it.

  “I’m fine, sir.”

  He stopped what he was doing and looked at her, giving her a smile. “You don’t have to call me that anymore. You can call me dad if you like.”

  Morgan wanted to point out that the reverse would have been normal. Calling him dad or even daddy as a child would be normal. Calling him sir now was a sign of respect.

  She did indeed respect him. He had built himself an empire. A few of her teachers had mentioned him in college, explaining how he had taken his inheritance and turned that million-dollar company into a multi-billion-dollar company. That was impressive, and she doubted that she could have done that.

  Yesterday, he had talked some about his parents. His mother had died when he was around twelve. They hadn’t been close, and she hadn’t spent time with him. His raising was left to nannies. Morgan listened to his excuses politely, but she still didn’t trust him. She only recognized the fact that he was trying.

  There was a knock at the door. Morgan turned to look at who was arriving.

  “Mr. Parson is here, sir.” The secretary announced him.

  “Thanks, Mrs. Glover. Could you please take Morgan’s coat and hang it up for her?”

  “This is Morgan?” she asked, beaming. “It’s wonderful to finally meet you, Miss Swift.”

  “Thank you, Mrs. Glover.” Morgan reached out her hand and shook the secretaries hand before she gave her the coat to be hung up.

  “Jim, this is my daughter, Morgan,” Martin announced almost a little too loudly. “I want you to show her your section as if she’s going to take over the company one-day. Because she just might.”

  “Yes, sir. It will be an honor.” The man’s eyes clearly said that he had no idea that Martin had a daughter.

  “Have her back here in an hour. I want her to see every department today. Take good care of her,” he called after them. His voice even cracked as if he were worried about her, making Morgan turn back to him and give him a slight wave with her hand.

  “Your father must have had you locked away in a convent. I didn’t even know that he had a daughter,” Mr. Parson commented.

  “He’s protective of me,” Morgan lied, but her lie made the man happy.

  “Do you go to college?” he asked her as he waited for the elevator to arrive.

  “I went to Yale for a couple of years, but then I stopped to travel some.”

  He nodded at her, accepting her answer.

  “So did you like Europe?” he asked her, trying to keep the conversation going.

  “I didn’t go there. I backpacked through America instead and got to know our country.” That only felt like a white lie because she had talked to so many truckers and people from all over the country.

  “Really. That’s fascinating.”

  She told him about her experience working as a waitress at a truck stop, and he was all ears, commenting how down to Earth she was.

  ~

  Morgan spent the day being passed from one department to the next. Her only break was when she had lunch with her father.

  Martin asked her about what she saw, and what her opinions were. At first, she was careful with her answers, but with time, she opened up, telling him what she really thought.

  “It’s all yours. You can sell it, keep it, and even run it to the ground if that pleases you. I’m leaving you everything.” He gave her an encouraging smile.

  “You know I can’t possibly run it like you did.” She worried aloud.

  “You can practice. If you’d like, you could hire someone to teach you the ropes until you feel comfortable doing it on your own.”

  “I wouldn’t know what to look for. I’m not a very good judge of character.”

  “I could help you while I’m still here,” he offered, making Morgan swallow hard. It was hard to hear him talk about himself that way.

  “I’ve gotten to the point that I’m accepting it. Before you came, I wanted to just get it over with. But you need me. I’ll help you sell the company if that’s what you want, or I’ll help you keep it.”

  “You have to prefer one over the other,” Morgan said, trying to please him as she always had.

  “Not really. I’m not a religious man. I’m going to return to the earth. I don’t believe in the hereafter.” He shrugged his shoulders.

  “Then why did you send me to a religious camp every year?”

  “I didn’t.” He looked surprised.

  “Yes, you did. I went to the same one every year.”

  Morgan watched him roll his eyes. “My secretary arranged your camps. You can thank her.”

  “Are you upset?” Morgan asked him.

  “No, but you have to admit that it was very sneaky. I can’t believe she got away with it for so long. She was the only one here who knew you existed.”

  Morgan felt a sharp pain in her belly as she wondered why he had gone to such lengths to deny her existence.

  “I’m not ashamed of you. I just knew that it would be better for you to stay away from me. I wasn’t the fatherly type.”

  “But why are you interested in me now, sir?” she dared to ask him, knowing that he didn’t have the strength to punish her.

  “Because I know what’s important in life. While I was waiting for the doctor in the hospital to give me my test results, all I could think about was you. I knew you were close by. I was in Texas at the time. But I also knew that you were happy with Sawyer.”

  “You knew where I was?” Morgan was shocked to hear that.

  “Yes. I hired private investigators to find you. But it was Nils Patterson who told me where you were. He hates my guts, but he hated the idea of a father not knowing where his daughter was even more. I owed him for that information.”

  “You don’t own him anymore?” she asked him.

  “No, I was able to pay him back. One of his kids needed help, and I saw that he got it. He’s happy now too.”

  “That was nice of you,” Morgan commented.

  “No. I didn’t do it out of kindness. I’m a strong believer in one hand washes the other. That’s how business works.”

  “Would you want me to operate your company that way?” she asked him.

  “You could operate it anyway you like to. I don’t care anymore. I wasted too much time here. I was obsessed, trying to be like my father.”

  “What was he like?”

  “He was exactly like me. Very concentrated on the business. Nothing else mattered to him. He had several affairs while my mother was still alive too. He was
an asshole. For some reason, I looked up to him and wanted to be exactly like him. Perhaps even better.”

  “Do you think I run the risk of being obsessed with the business too?” she asked him softly.

  “No, because you don’t want to be like me. That makes you the smart one in the family.”

  The word smart resounded in Morgan’s mind. She remembered the endless punishments she got when her grades hadn’t been perfect. She had suffered so much as a child.

  Morgan could see that he was trying, but it was nearly impossible not to see the little girl, who still lived inside of her heart. That girl had needed so much love that she had been starved for it.

  Morgan would give anything to be able to go back in time and tell that little girl that she was loved. She longed to hug her. But it didn’t work that way. She could still tell herself that a million times, and she’d never believe it. Someone else needed to convince her.

  ~

  Morgan stood beside her father’s bed. He hadn’t been able to leave the house since the day he took her to see his company. Three times a week she went to the company to check on things and let people get used to seeing her there.

  Because she hadn’t heard from Sawyer, she decided to go back to Yale and to run the company with help, lots of help. She was going to keep it for now. There was nowhere else for her to go.

  The doctor looked at her and shook his head. Every day her father had gotten closer to death. She spent a lot of time with him, getting to know him. In the meantime, she got the impression that he liked her. His eyes lighted up when she walked in the room. The staff said that he coughed less when she was with him.

  Today wasn’t a good day for him to die. It was Thanksgiving, and the doctor wanted to go home to his family. There was a thick layer of snow outside. This wasn’t what he wanted. He’d wanted Morgan to wear a black dress and carry a red rose and lay it on his coffin. How could she do that with a winter coat on? The rose would wilt and die in the cold.

  Martin looked at his daughter. Tears were running down the sides of her face. He didn’t deserve them. He hadn’t been the father she needed and certainly not the one that she deserved. “Morgan, I love you.” Speaking those words cost him the last of his strength. His head turn a little, and his mouth was open, and his eyes didn’t blink.

 

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