“No, it’s okay, Bry. Don’t worry about it. I’ll take a cab.”
“I’m sorry, Zoe. It’s bad enough I’m not in the office. I can’t miss this call.”
“No problem.” She flung open the door, trying to hide her relief. She should never have asked him anyway. It was much wiser if they parted company for a bit. “It’s fine. I’ll be back in a little bit. Bye.”
When she reached the street, she felt oddly light, as though she’d escaped a confined space. Her apartment had suddenly seemed way too small with Bryan in it.
She recalled how Julian had seemed to fit right in…standing by the living room windows, scowling and sweating and hammering things. Her lungs contracted at the thought of him. She couldn’t allow herself to think about him right now. Her first order of business was business. Putting her professional life back together would be easier and probably much less painful than repairing the gaping hole in her heart. If she didn’t want to fall apart, that’s what she had to concentrate on at the moment.
She hailed a cab and put all thoughts of men out of her mind.
Julian sat in the dark in a place deep beneath what had once been his townhouse. The scent of burnt wood and ozone filtered down this far and had become trapped in the damp pockets of air underground.
He hated it here. How could he have once felt at home down here where the rats scuttled and vile water ran down the grimy walls? How could he have once taken comfort in this uppermost layer of hell?
He fingered the glass vial Hester had given him, tipped it in the dimness and strained his eyes to watch the dark liquid roll toward the small cork stopper.
Zoe invaded his thoughts, again. In fact, all night long while he’d wandered aimlessly through the tunnels, he’d thought of nothing but her.
If he saw her again, Lambert would kill her, and her end would be neither swift nor painless. Julian could still stop him, could still regain his power with one swallow. And then the only threat to Zoe would be himself. Would he be able to keep his promise to Hester to leave her alone? Probably not. Already he’d started back toward her apartment twice. His blasted conscience had stopped him both times. He could not put her in danger just because he selfishly wanted to be with her again.
If he could barely control himself now, what would he do when his inhibitions were stripped away? When logic and reason were permanently replaced by greed and insatiable hunger, nothing would stop him from doing exactly what he wanted with her.
He willed himself to breathe and to make his final decision. After a moment, he pulled the tiny cork from the bottle.
“That went well.” Zoe sighed as she climbed back into a cab and flipped open her cell phone. It was just getting dark and after two hours of filling out forms with a surly insurance agent and watching the man take digital photos of the broken fire door, she was exhausted. Her stomach was in knots from trying to placate her landlord, and she was genuinely worried that he would cancel her lease despite his reluctant promises to give her a second chance. No amount of creative explaining seemed to convince him that she hadn’t somehow invited someone to crash into the back of the store and ruin a fire door which wasn’t up to code to begin with. She suspected a large part of his anger stemmed from the city building department threatening to fine him for not only the door, but a few other violations they’d found during their recent inspection. Though the other things weren’t Zoe’s fault, he apparently felt that if the break-in hadn’t occurred, he wouldn’t be in the hole for what was turning into an exorbitant amount of money above and beyond what insurance would pay.
So now on top of worrying if she could make her next rent payment, she had to hope there would be a next payment to make. She faced the upsetting prospect of asking her parents for a small loan. She needed moral support, and she started by dialing Tanya, who picked up on the first ring. “Where are you?” her friend said without preamble.
“Hi yourself. I’m in a cab on my way back to my apartment from the shop.”
“I was just at your apartment. Bryan is waiting there to take you to your parents’ house. What happened to your car?”
“I left it in Ocean City. Actually I was wondering if you might want to take a ride with me to get it back.” She could drop in on Hester and say hello and spend a little quality time with Tanya.
“Why me? I know Bryan spent the night with you, Zoe. You can stop lying to me.” Tanya’s voice turned cold, and something began to curdle in Zoe’s already upset stomach.
Oh no. She couldn’t lose a friend too. She’d never manage to get through losing Julian if her whole support system came crashing down around her now.
“Yes, he did stay with me last night, but…I was sick.”
“Right. I know. Look Z, I really don’t care if you two are together, but it bothers me that you’re trying to keep me in the dark about it.”
Zoe pinched the bridge of her nose. “We’re not. We’re not together. I know it looks bad, but really, there’s nothing between Bryan and me. You saw Julian. You know I’m involved with him.” Was involved. Was. Was. Was.
“I know you slept with Bryan last year.” Tanya’s response rang in Zoe’s ear. The silence afterward was deafening.
The cab stopped short at a red light just then, and Zoe had to grab the door handle to keep from falling out of the seat. “What?”
“He told me.”
Aw crap. Why? “Uh…Tanya—”
“He has feelings for you. What are you going to do about it?”
“Nothing! Absolutely nothing. I promise. Tanya, I don’t want to be with Bryan, I swear it.” Oh God. This was exactly the mess they’d hoped to avoid by agreeing to keep their one unfortunate mistake a secret. Why on earth had Bryan gone and broken their pact?
“It’s all right, Zoe. If you want him, you can have him, because I don’t anymore. I’m done pining away for Bryan James.”
“But I don’t…Tanya? Tanya?” Again there was silence. Zoe stared at her cell phone for two full blocks before she broke the connection. What was Bryan thinking? Had he lost his mind? Why should that surprise her? She’d lost hers this week, too, along with her heart.
When she regained her bearings, she tried to call Tanya back, but there was no answer. She wondered if she’d just been kicked out of their circle for good, and she hated herself for ever thinking it would be wise to keep a secret from her friend. It had seemed like the right thing to do at the time, a mistake best forgotten. Now Bryan was blabbing about it, and to what end?
By the time the cab pulled up in front of her apartment, she’d channeled her hurt over losing Julian and Tanya into a good solid mad. Tanya might have a right to be angry, but she was determined to make sure it was for the right reasons, and not because she thought Bryan and Zoe were having a secret affair.
She paid the driver and raced up the stairs, calling Bryan’s name as she flung her door open.
He wasn’t there. Not in the bathroom, the bedroom—thank goodness—or the kitchen. She found a hastily scribbled note on the table.
Z, got called in to work. Sorry. Here’s $ for the cab to your mom’s. Will call you.
B
A twenty lay on the table under the crisp sheet of white paper. She let out her anger and frustration in a long, loud sigh. Men! Never around when you need to yell at them.
“Fine. Fine. It’s better this way.” She jammed the money and the note into her purse, grabbed her overnight bag and headed back downstairs. Maybe a quiet evening at her parents’ house would do her some good after all. She could recuperate and figure out how she was going to grab the reins of her runaway life and get everything back under control.
Chapter Seventeen
“You look so pale. Everyone is afraid of the sun now because of the ozone layer, but you know, just fifteen minutes of direct sunlight a day can give you your daily allowance of vitamin D.” Anna fluttered around her kitchen, dusting crumbs from the countertops and arranging pretty dishtowels on a rack above the sink while she
rhapsodized about the condition of her daughter’s skin tone.
“I’m fine, Mom.” Zoe hated interrupting her mother’s lectures, since that usually led to another lecture, but if she heard how pale she was one more time, she’d lose it.
She’d made a quick trip to the garden this morning to assuage her sudden panic that perhaps Julian had turned her. She didn’t feel like a vampire, and she was pretty sure she was breathing, but the sunlight test put her fears to rest—some of them, anyway.
Now, while she stood in her mother’s spotless kitchen forcing herself to prepare a cup of coffee and a toasted bagel, she let her mind wander to the possibility that maybe Julian had been trying to turn her, to make her his eternal mate. She wasn’t sure if it scared her more or less that Julian might have wanted to claim her rather than kill her. The thought made her shiver violently enough to spill coffee all over the counter. She’d been cleaning it up when her mother appeared.
“I have some vitamins in the cabinet. Why don’t you take some?” Anna continued while Zoe dumped wet paper towels in the trash. She found herself a mug and poured some of the coffee Zoe had made.
“Maybe after breakfast. I’m sorry about barging in here last night.”
“Honey, you can’t barge in here. This is your home too.” Anna put a warm hand on Zoe’s arm. “Now, why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you? It’s the break-in, isn’t it? If you don’t feel safe living in that neighborhood anymore, you’re welcome to come back here, you know.”
“No, it’s not that at all, Mom. I…Bryan’s been acting weird around me, I had an argument with Tanya, and she hasn’t answered her phone since yesterday. I think everyone is mad at me, and I don’t know how to fix it if they won’t talk to me.”
Anna nodded. “Don’t worry. I’ll call Mrs. Hayden right now—”
“No!” Zoe practically leapt across the kitchen when her mother reached for the phone. “I’m not twelve. I don’t need you to mediate for me.”
“I’m just trying to help. You look so miserable.”
“I am, but I’ll get over it. Eventually.” She checked her watch after a quick sip of what was left of her coffee. “What time is dinner tonight?”
“Seven. I thought maybe you and I could decorate the garden beforehand. I bought some of those Chinese paper lanterns that Gregory likes.”
Zoe cringed. Any other time she might have enjoyed the relative normalcy of a day spent puttering in her mother’s garden, but she wasn’t sure she could handle all the peace and serenity today.
She set down her mug and pasted on a fake smile. “Actually, I have a ton of errands to run. Can you drive me to the bus station?”
“The bus station? You’re going to run errands on a bus?”
“I have to pick up my car, then I have to…uh…pick up Gregory’s present and work on getting in touch with Tanya.”
“Where’s your car?”
Zoe avoided her mother’s gaze. “Long story. I need to get it. I’ll be back by seven. I promise.”
Anna looked bewildered. “All right, but I could just drive you wherever you need—”
“It’s a long ride, and you need to decorate the garden. I’ll be back later, I promise.”
Looking only mildly disappointed, Anna grabbed her car keys and purse and headed for the door with Zoe on her heels.
“I don’t know whether it’s bravery or stupidity that brought you back, Julian, but I will confess, I’m glad to see you.”
“I’m not here to give you everything you want, Enoch. But I am willing to negotiate.” Julian stood just inside the french doors of Lambert’s second floor office. Two steps behind him, bright sunlight lit the small balcony that overlooked a landscaped garden complete with koi ponds and banks upon banks of night-blooming flowers.
Sitting at his huge desk within the shadowed recesses of his dark-paneled office, Lambert smiled. He’d always liked to live dangerously, conducting business during the day with a view of the sunlit garden, enjoying a real wood fire in the middle of winter. It seemed as if Enoch wanted to appear human, to test the boundaries of being what he was. Another nod to the power of pride. “Are you really in a position to negotiate, Julian?”
“I think I am. I’m willing to relinquish my place in the hierarchy entirely and remain human. If I allowed you to sire me, you could compel me to turn Anton’s holdings over to you, but I’m here to offer you access to his accounts and his files, even his private library—what’s left of it—willingly.”
Lambert’s unctuous smile became a frown. “You don’t think I’ll fall for this, do you? Last night you had a wooden stake poised above my heart. Why would you change your mind about killing me today?”
Julian took a deep breath. Weakness. He’d learned too well that being human was all about being enslaved by one’s weaknesses. He still wasn’t sure he’d ever get used to it, but now he had no choice. He’d made his decision.
“You taught me something last night, Enoch. Or rather, I learned something about myself because of your actions.”
Lambert raised a sculptured brow and steepled his fingers in front of him. “Go on.”
“Here’s my proposal. I’ll give you what you want, all except for my private company. I’ll stay out of your business and you stay out of mine, and you agree to leave Zoe alone. None of your men are ever to touch her again.”
Lambert squinted. “The girl? The one who took you in and pulled the thorn from your paw?”
“Don’t waste my time playing coy, Enoch. I always knew you had the power to hurt her. I just never expected that it would bother me if you did.”
Leaning back in his ornate leather chair, Lambert looked satisfied, if a little confused. “You’re giving up your claim to Anton’s legacy in the vampire world for a human? Have you lost your mind as well as your fangs?”
Julian held his temper and his ground. He wanted nothing more than to pick Lambert up bodily and toss him into the brilliant late morning sunlight. That would solve his problems quickly and cleanly, but it might not guarantee Zoe’s safety. “I’ve lost more than I care to discuss, Enoch. You should be enjoying your victory.”
“Oh, I am, Julian. More than I would have imagined possible.” Lambert rose and held his hand out to Julian in a very human gesture of good faith. “I believe we have a deal, old friend.”
The look of surprise on Hester’s face was almost worth the amount of time and trouble it took Zoe to make her way back to the witch’s front door. Sympathy replaced shock in Hester’s smoky eyes all too quickly, and Zoe knew she probably looked like a woman with a broken heart. If nothing else, she shared that with the voluptuous spellcaster.
“Is he…?” Hester couldn’t complete her question. She held open her front door and waved Zoe inside.
“He’s alive—well—undead, I guess. I went to Fairmont last night to look for him, to try to help him.”
Hester made her way to the kitchen, and Zoe followed. “You shouldn’t have done that. He could have—”
“He did.” Heat crept into Zoe’s cheeks at the admission. “He bit me, so I’m told. I don’t remember anything.”
Hester turned a stern look on her. “I did warn you.”
“I know.”
The witch began setting saucers and tea cups on the small table, and a moment later a kettle rattled on the stove. Zoe rubbed her eyes and ran her fingers through the wind-tangled mass of her hair, which she hadn’t bothered to tie back today. “I came here for more than my car.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I don’t have anything that can make you fall out of love with him.” Hester dropped aromatic tea bags into the two cups. “Vanilla and chamomile. It’ll dull the ache a little.”
“Oh, I didn’t come for an anti-love potion.” With her thumb, Zoe traced patterns on the fanciful tiles that inlaid the top of Hester’s kitchen table. “But there’s something else I think you can help me with.”
“I’ll do what I can.” Hester sounded sincere, and the knot in Zo
e’s stomach that had formed at the thought of asking her for help began to unravel.
“When I was with Julian, he told me you had power—ways of defending yourself against vampires. What did he mean?”
Hester eyed the tea kettle which suddenly began to whistle. She poured water into their cups and sat down opposite Zoe before answering. “Vampires are deceivers by nature. They have to be to survive in a world overrun with humans. Most people would never know they’d met a vampire. Some never even know they’ve been fed on by a vampire. I have ways to negate their influence. That’s why Julian and I…got along so well. I saw him for exactly what he was. He had to be honest with me all the time, and I think he appreciated that. Having to lie to everyone around you takes a toll.”
Zoe knew that all too well. “Is it something I can learn?”
Over the rim of her tea cup, Hester’s eyes widened. “You’re not planning on confronting him, are you? You can’t be around him, Zoe. In fact, you should disappear. Go somewhere he can never find you.”
“No. I won’t. I won’t try to see him, but I won’t leave town either. I would have given up everything for him, but I won’t do that for a vampire. I refuse to run away and hide.”
Hester sighed and sipped. Zoe breathed in the vapors of the tea and let them soothe her.
“I can do a few spells that will help protect you. He won’t be able to influence you, but if he wants to hurt you, he’ll still find a way. He did make me a promise that he would honor my request to stay away from you. I don’t think he’s above finding ways around it, though. He’s clever, and if he should find out that he can’t lie to you, he’ll be angry. With both of us.”
Zoe nodded. At this point, she’d take whatever she could get. She needed some real magick, not just a bundle of sweet-smelling herbs…which had strangely disappeared. At least she hadn’t found the smudge stick Hester had given her anywhere in her apartment this morning. She met Hester’s gaze. “Julian respected you because you were strong. I need to be strong, too, so give me everything you’ve got.”
Uncross My Heart Page 18